FUCK MAGPIES

FUCK MAGPIES

>Going for a jog
>see 10 fucking magpies infront of me.
>SPRINT AS FAST AS I CAN TO GO THOUGH THEM
>FUCKING MAGPIES.
>THEY ALL SWOOP AND BITE AT ME
>FUCKING MAGPIES

youtube.com/watch?v=ozS2N3NtcQU

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=Eh_NAd2ygRI
youtube.com/watch?v=EV4qZ_lgStw
youtube.com/watch?v=BbRS9K4rZ8Y
twitter.com/NSFWRedditGif

I was chased by about thirty of them when I went for a jog a few weeks ago. They kept hitting me, and swooping at me. One of them ended up slicing my head open with their beak.
I ended up getting pissed off, and when I turned around, I saw one flying at top speed directly towards my face. I punched it as hard as I could. Killed it, but broke my hand. All of them freaked out and flew away after that.

Feels good man

Fucking brutal man.
I hate these fucking magpies.

Magpie kill things for no reason.
youtube.com/watch?v=Eh_NAd2ygRI

Yeah, they're flying rodents. Fucking shits. We should nuke them like we nuked the Emus.

Last spring one tried to rake me across my eye the little cunt. If I didn't close my eye in time I don't know what the fuck it would've looked like, luckily ended up with just a cut across my eyelid.

MAGPIE GENOCIDE WHEN? COLLINGWOOD SUPPORTERS INCLUDED.

But... You guys lost

Magpies are redpilled as fuck tbqh.

>It's an Australian has an aneurysm over a magpie episode

The bird?

Australian Magpies are cute

youtube.com/watch?v=EV4qZ_lgStw

m8 u have no idea

CAWCAWCAWCAWCAWCAWCAW

We use the Emu breeding grounds as nuke testing sites these days, friend. We may have lost a small battle, BUT WE WON THE WAR

>implying Plovers aren't deadlier

>that drifting car
Australians, shiposting everywhere.

Fuck these guys. STOP LAYING YOUR EGGS IN MY BACKYARD EVERY YEAR AND SWOOPING ME WHEN I GARDEN.

...

Feed them you dumb fuck!!!
>They will attack everyone BUT you
Try it and get back to us.

Next time post a trypophobia warning you nigger.

Canada ain't got nothing on us cunt.

STOP YOURE TRIGGERING HIS FLASHBACKS OF WHEN A MAGPIE ATE HIS KANGAROO

>bird feeder for the sparrows on balcony
>magpies fly in, look at me to see if cool, it is
>make pleasant warble noises as they get some seeds
It's only when they're teaching their young how to caw that I think they're cunts.

>have magpies in street
>feed them some nuts and dried fruit every couple of days
>its magpie baby season
>magpies chill af to me for the whole season

Wow that was hard sounds like you need to learn to make friends with the animal kingdom op

This.

Most people don't realize that they actually remember individuals.

Smart little cunts.

Reminds me of this

youtube.com/watch?v=BbRS9K4rZ8Y

Get rekt m8.

>getting cucked by magpies

How is this any different to if there was an abo at the end of your street who said "got a durry cunt?" every time you walked past and you gave him some each time so he wouldn't bash ya

Magpies are such assholes. I want nothing to do with their young, im just passing through but because they have such a shit attitude they fucking swoop me. Fucking fight me you heartless, cunt birds.

Since this is obviously a slide thread, what are we sliding this time my shill?

This is a legit happening thread you stupid Finn, is bloody magpie season

I'm not gonna walk around the whole damn country side befriending birds.

I've noticed a lot of magpies flying fast and at low altitude lately, ominous desu

You're all faggots. It's swooping season because they have babies in the nests. Lots of birds do it in spring. You should know this. Are you all new Australians or something? Give them respect. They're smarter than black people including every Indian doing a full fee paying IT degree here. Walk across the street.

>slide thread
This is a happened thread you fucking Chink! This is the beginning of the War.

They don't give me any respect though, their attitude is shit.

All of the birds from the corvus family are pretty smart
if they attack you it means that you either fucked up or you failed to befriend them
or australian magpies are just cancerous compared to ours, i don't know.

If I was good at drawing, I'd make a magpie one.

The abos will turn on you when you give them stuff
>magpies will watch your back and swoop abos that are annoying you

The worst part is they are legally protected so you can't do shit to move or kill them, putting the lives of a shitty bird above the physical safety of people is fucked.

10 months of the year they're chill AF, they just get hyper protective when they've got eggs/chicks to protect

most of ours don't do that (jackdaws, hooded crows, magpies, ravens) but I guess it depends on where they place their nests.

>cucked

Lol no enjoy getting cucked by your lack of almost Druid tier power over the animal kingdom. Enjoy your lack of summons you god damn pleb.

kek, This.

>jog

magpies know that cardio kills gainz, unlike you cucks

I've never seen these guys up close before. What the fuck kind of monstrosity are they? They have goddamn spikes on their wings

>lest we forget

The daily life of an australian

and then you shipped the noisy buggers here

Australian magpies looks like real dicks. Euroasian ones are chill as fuck.

You're pathetic its a bird

>We use the Emu breeding grounds as nuke testing sites these days, friend
holy shit, you're asking for a Emuzilla

>be aussie
>pay tribute to your feathered masters

THE ENDS JUSTIFY THE MEANS. IF WE GET EMUZILLA, THEN THE WHOLE WORLD WILL BE IT'S PLAYGROUND. EITHER WAY, WE WIN. WE WILL FORM THE ALLIANCE OF EMU HUNTERS.

what the fuck, that's just wrong

>Australia
>Peaceful animals

Choose one Ahmed

>SHANNON? what are your thoughts on Maurice?
>Maurice? HES A FUCKING CUNT

>britbong makes fun of aussies

you guys are the softest men in the anglosphere

>see image
>filtered

P O L I T I C S
O
L
I
T
I
C
S

THAT FUCKING SKID AT 1:10

Please take me Straya

>buy a shitton of 5k v8 sedans/coupes
>ship them to aus
>get my dodgy mate trev to ADR them
>sell them for 80k each

No, it's a bad photoshop of a lotus seed pod on a finger. Literally 2 minutes or less to create this exact image.

>plovers start attacking the weaker rugby players