/SJC/ Save Jonahs Career

Bring out your best comebacks, I'll counter every single one of them.

*sizes her up, looks up and down at her*
*raises eyebrows*
*scoffs*
That's fucking it.

Who's this peen dean?

>What's that Jonah? Food stuck in your throat?

>"I have that same fantasy but instead of me leaving we all rape you and cover it up with our money and influence"
>french audience now accustomed to and lowkey loving rape cheers

>How is that bad for me? I get the dinner, Leo and Brad get the syphilis.

Kek

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>Keep dreaming...

Who's this brap trap?

Not gonna lie, lads - I am fully devoted to protecting Jonah's pride, but I wouldn't mind getting a piece of that sweet French ass. I would fuck her hard to avenge /ourguy/, but I would also be gentle because Ornella is a sweet flower meant to be loved. At the end of it all, during the moment of climax, I would dedicate it to Jonah. As I shoot my fluids inside the lady with the force of a thousand black holes, I would scream with all my might, "FOR JONAH!". That is the moment I would prove my worth as a proud member of the Jonah defence force.

The pasta where he pulls out a gun, and holds everyone in the room hostage is the only correct response. It’s even more correct when accompanied with the shooped picture.

This is it. This is the one. Someone get in touch with Jonah NOW, he can salvage this

Sup Forums and Jonah remain BTFO to this day.

Wow, even better than, "Me leaving would be the most realistic part of that fantasy."

Who's this fluid druid?

>I don't see why you would need money and influence, seeing as your frame is enough to cover it up.

>You thought I was after sex? Non mon amour, I was planning on watching your movies and having a good laugh. I'm not talking about your comedies.

...

Who's this dick tick?

>Haha fair enough, I can't compete with Leo and Brad on the looks front! They're both great to work and hang out with too, I'm lucky to call them my friends.

No risk of looking butthurt, diffuses her insult with some self-deprecation that makes Jonah seem charmingly self-aware, quickly moves topic away from the joke into some touching insights about the superstars to win the audience over.

If she tries to insult him again at this point "Yes you don't even come close to them!" then the audience turns on her for being overly cruel.

Who's this drool ghoul?

>yeah, I figured you were vain

This is maybe the greatest meme in the history of this website.

Who's this suck cuck?

Who's this masturbation instrumentation?

Well memes are cancer and this one is pure, unadulterated cancer so, by that metric, I suppose it is

Who's this rape cake?

>Hahahaha. Hold up? So you'd single me out bit let two goyim stay? A-are you an anti-semite?

>Look straight into camera and shake your head in disaproval.

Her career would be over before he'd left the studio. Jews are to French what cows are to hindus.

Who's this shute brute?

damn, and here I thought you enjoyed my dick in your mouth in your audition yesterday

Who's this shitter licker?

>Oh you do like to eat Jonah, do you?

Ornellapostin and Jonahpostin are saving Sup Forums.

>Jonah, you're giving up so soon? Is this the reason you've yet to find a girl?

Well Mr. Detective, can you figure out why you're still single?

Thats just weak now
>Yes, I do

Who's this fuck duck?

No, these don't work

French lady loses if she uses either of these

>My cock is too big for you anyway

life is cancer my friend

Those comebacks I responded to were self-defeating and not on the offensive which is hard to respond to anyway.

...

WE DID IT

WE FUCKING DID IT!!

>I know you are but what am I?

Does she have noods pls response

Nothing you can really say, it's her show so you'll never win the crowd over. I would just furrow my eyebrows and give her an odd look if she said some shit like that to me. Then I would finish the interview a little early and go on with my life making movies,

this is how you win, undercut the joke/insult and win the audience support
there's no winning by going on the offensive, you treat her like she's a kid making a joke and you're the adult that can handle it/doesn't care

kek based jonah

lol

sincere and charming
t-bh the best one

So you would go through all that just to get rejected by them?

>Oh Jonah, keep your chin up, and your other one. Your charm will win a girl over one day.

>What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the North Hollywood Acting School, and I've been involved in ...

>"Brad Pitt and Leonardo DiCaprio? Yeah, I know those guys. So you kick me out, and then they come over... You're losing me here, sorry. I'm just not sure where this is going. What happens next?"

Well you know Ornella, I usually play a character who is kind of a sick in my movies, on the other hand playing with dicks seems to be your character

Did I win?

>keep your chin up, and your other one
what did she mean by this?
>Your charm will win a girl over one day.
is this supposedly to be funny

dick*

a fantasy that, believe me, will never happen

Guess I can't afford you

No charge for them. They are no my friends.

>They prefer blondes, like that lovely lady over there.
He could have pandered to PC crowd to the adulation of people back home, joke that she ranks lower than Daniel Craig in a wig while complementing the tranny, stealthily call his friends faggots which he got in trouble for saying all in one swoop while appearing classy and above her joke.

She's race mixer anyway.

>How am I supposed to respond to that?

not solid enough

i'll leave the room just to look for my wallet

*stare at her with a stern countenance*

*symphatetically*
oh sorry, they prefer pretty women

Jonah BTFO french slut

fair enough. after all, I only pay for one hour of your services

>you sure you don't want any of this? I am packing a foot long after all
>Jonah proceeds to whip out his handy pocket sub, put it on his crotch and flail it around while oil, vegetables and meatballs fly everywhere

MONTHS OF BRAINSTORMING HAS PAID OFF

GET JONAH ON THE PHONE BOYS

It only took a year, but this is it. Pls include me in screencap.

we planned to go to our fitness class together, we assumed you weren't into it

someone tweet this comeback to jonah pls asap

this and emphasize the working with part so she spends time thinking about her own dead end career instead of a witty comback

>picking on the weakest comeback in the thread
surely the french bitch got BTFO

still no rebuttal, i think we found the one

>I mean, yeah sure. I didn't know your boyfriend was into that kind of thing though

SOMEONE CALL JONAH NOW.

>Jonah mon chéri, you'll never have to worry about stds... you have to have sex to actually get them!

Could this be it?

you fucking CUNT

But the point of the original joke is that Jonah isn't having sex explicitly so he doesn't get STDs.

>lol what I'm I your pimp or something?

that's it, i'm done with diplomacy
i'm solving it the american way BITCH

It's hopeless, isn't it