Would your years at Hogwarts actually be that memorable?

Would your years at Hogwarts actually be that memorable?

yeah, magic is fun

May you live in interesting times is a curse, not a blessing.
Let me pass my GEDs in peace without war fucking breaking out

I assume all the years between the chamber of secrets first being opened and the first rise of Voldemort were pretty fucking boring.

>SNEEDSEVERFUCKINGSCENEPOLTURDREDDITPEDO
Was this spell only in the movies? Always kinda irked me

>Always kinda irked me

What irks me is that Harry Potter is the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises. Each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the seriesüf only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but itüfs certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books are g-g-good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King

Grow up

>replying
>boring, short opening sentence
delete this and try again

I would've raped Cho, so yes

Nerd culture was a mistake. I'm studying CS and pretty much every single day I see or hear shit like this. Today the winner group of a contest got Nyan Cat shirts as their prize.

try again with the family dog, virgin

90% guranteed the person who has this in their house watches the big bang theory religiously.

where did the sub culture come from where its okay to "pretend to be nerdy or geeky to an extent" its so fucking odd.

My highschool years sucked donkey ass and I still carried a lot of it to adulthood. If I could have even a little bit of what Harry Potter experienced then I would remember it forever.

>No!
Gets me everytime

Big Bang Theory started it, the marvel movies entrenched it in the mainstream. It's now mainly corporate driven in the same way anime studios in Japan drive oktaku culture so they can sell figurines and body pillows.

ugghh.. I don't know how i'd react if someone showed me they have a poster like that. I'd probably just pretend its funny because eeeuuuuhhhhhgggg

>Answer to everything is 42
i have only seen the movie once, and i know that's wrong. Normie geeks should be removed

Well I would learn about magic so I hope so. Also I'd hope I'd be in Hufflepuff so I don't actually have to bother with saving the world/ being a wizard nazi. I'd also wouldn't want to be a nerd.

deez

haven't heard that insult since I was 13

>shit hits the fan once a week
>people fuck up spells all the time
>treason and fuckery at every corner
>official sport includes heavy metal balls attacking you at high speeds while flying on a clearly unsecure vehicle

It's gonna be memorable alright

>Americans call this guy "Professor Kwerl"

lmao

how do you pronounce his name? and where are you from?

I'd probably just use magic to do good at sex.
Or polymorph into a woman.

How hard would it be to transfigure, say, a melon, into a passable facsimile of Hermione Grainger's head?

Doctor Squirell. Sneed's.

it's pronounced queer-real-mc-turban-head

Depends on the size of the melon. Also, first year or seventh year Hermione?

>Doctor

Howd you get that pic of my poster?

>Learn plenty of spells
>get myself friends
>having a blast doing shit
>as the time go on realize there are more to life than this
>start reading up dark art and other shit that could be around the world
>get told in the muggle world you cannot do magic or you get the magic feds
>wonder why voldemort is such a piece of shit that can't kill a kid
>school is finished
>never learn about how to make money
>Have to decide between dead-end bureaucracy job or do a living doing whatever as long as i earn gold
>decide to travel the world searching lost glory and doing random shit
>finally end up doing horcrutch and become the greatest threat walking on earth

I think solely on the basis of cantaloupes being much more common than bigger melons like maybe a watermelon and cantaloupes being generally smaller than your average watermelon it would have to be somewhere 3rd year or under, based on the size of available melons and no other determining factors whatsoever

>Black/Potter gang years
>boring

I'm from the UK

It's pronounced like "quick" but replace the "ck" with "rell"

Koo-ee-ral

I think I would have developed charms or runes that could build little structures. Like a house token. I liked lego and shit around the time I first was read HP.

I went to a coed boarding school for 3 years, only memorable shit was boning whores in skirts and sneaking in weed

I guess that shit's better with magik though

and now you post on Sup Forums

why wouldn't I

That scene is so kino. Flying pumpkins. Purple turban. Kid's in weird britbong uniforms. Long wooden tables with holiday food.

K I N O

Galleons, the largest currency in the Harry Potter world, are made of pure gold. Sickles, the second most expensive, are made of pure silver. The exchange ratio is 7 sickles to 1 galleon.

Obviously those greedy Jew goblins had never heard of arbitrage, because whenever the rate of gold to silver in the muggle world outstrips 7 to 1, you could just take a meltdown a shit load of your galleons, exchange it for silver bars, have them stamp out new sickles and trade them back for like 50 times the amount of galleons you started with. I wonder ((((who)))) owns Diagon Alley now.

...

>the answer to everything is 42
Like the number of times your resume was rejected when they saw "liberal arts major" on it.

>teacher catches me in the forbidden part of the library
>tell me he'll get me expelled if i don't behave
>turns me into a girl
>fucks me
>while his dick is inside me he casts enlargement spell
>have to spend rest of school pretending to be new female student
>have to pretend to be a boy during holidays at muggle parent's council flat
>mfw

dont you have school uniforms in burgerville too?

With all that magic and shit around and a huge ass school....honestly speaking could you actually go to school without knowing about jackass potter and his bullshit till like the very end?

I always thought it'd have been such a big school like some kid maybe from Slytherin just did his shit, got super good at that broom stick game and was trying to go pro or whatever in it without even knowing about harry potter outside of hearing his name

Given that he and his family threw Wizard Hitler into hiding after years of terror, there's no way you wouldn't hear of him at least a few times (especially with the events of Half-Blood Prince and Deathly Hallows).
I don't imagine there were more than a few thousand students at the school at a time, which from my experience in a bigger school people still at least knew about the top jocks and winners of big events no matter where they were on the chain.

>"No!"

BASED POTTERPOSTER

The castle is pretty big but the number of students is pretty small. There is only around 300. You'd probably run into the little shit more than few times over 7 years

Fucking ragheads teaching our kids? Did we vote brexit for this lads? Fudge is a massive KEK.

I'd love to see the Sup Forums of the magic world. There would be a whole board about multijuiceing hookers as your crush.

>pronouncing it differently from the way it's spelt

>there will never be a Riverdale type show about those years

why live

Would wizard traps use the magic potion to turn themselves into qt grills?

>>Is it still gay?

>potter pissbaby is a riverdale roastie as well
OF FUCKING COURSE

No, but I wouldn't want to put myself through the same turmoil Harry and the other kids who had to live through Voldemorts second uprising went through.

A normal 7 years at Hogwarts, maybe a Triwizard Tournament I don't have to participate in myself would be enough for me.

Yeah, and not at all unless you're said trap

>How does Brexit affect the economy in the magic world?

>How about the wand taxes?

Cs?

Cocky suckyy

>mfw

chad seduction

It's missing the WUBBA LUBBA crap.

>Cunt Slurping

better adaptation desu

Child Slavery

it is watered down nihilism anyways
these normies don't even use it properly

...

Imagine using a hot girl's hair and making polyjuice potion and convincing your roommate to drink it and get nailed by everyone

christian soulsearching

Hogwarts, despite being this massive castle always seemed to give off the impression that the class sizes were like 30-50 kids a year. No way there was close to 1000 kids at a time

How would you get the polyjuice potion? The ingredients are extremely rare and expensive, and it's notoriously hard to brew correctly. I don't think you've thought this through to be honest.

>Go to Hogwarts
>Get your Basic Spellcaster Diploma, mediocre grades all around
>Work moping floors at the Leaky Cauldron and save up some galeons for a couple months
>Move to some shitty third world country where magic goes almost unchecked
>Bone every single bitch you ever see using the love potion
>Fuck around with your muggle friends and make them believe there's a ghost in their houses
>Magically forge muggle money as it is stated in the books only magic money is impossible to falsify
>Become a god among ants

Why did wizards ever broke a sweat is beyond me.

Well I suppose I could pick some up from the room of requirement

That's what normies get in CS, if they're lucky.

Chuck Sneed

>That power, though hard to learn, can endeed be acquired
>Not acquiring it

It's like you're gay or something

Cuck Soldier

because wizards also realised that they needed law and order to cooexist and not cause horrific damage to the world? Humans by animal standards are incredibly powerful as well yet we set up checks and limits. Wizarding world is the same.

Clam Savouring

Probably special magical gold/silver or some super secret spell to make it wizard money.

Because just mining out massive amounts of gold with spells seems rather easy.

Somebody linked Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationaility in one of these threads last week and now I'm nearly 30 chapters in. There's no way he'll see this post so I guess linking it is a good way to thank him.

www.hpmor.com/

Basically it's the first book but Petunia married an Oxford professor instead of Vernon Dursley so Harry isn't an idiot. Hermione also gets put in Ravenclaw and Neville Longbottom goes in Hufflepuff.

so they say, yet they make it all the fucking time

It's pretty OK but harry is kinda obnoxious and Mary-Sue. Lots of nice ideas though

is there anything more exciting happening besides that premise?
Is it basically just "Harry Potter, but instead of HP we get a main character who isn't a complete retard"?

cringe

>"""professional""" fan fiction

It's like Choir-ull

>Implying the ethnic group holding the most power in the world would just suck it up and hide from the peasents

Have you been living under a rock m8?

It's pretty cool how he tries to rationalize magic. But it's way too long and the author uses the same trick over and over again.

Really enjoyed it though

Christ that is cringe.

That's kinda hot actually

Would you tell all the others it was actually your roommate or would you let them think it was the hot girl

>get invited to hogwarts
>actually really religious
>magic is the work of the devil
>go undercover
>start an underground clan with the plan to end the wizard kind
>purge the school of heretics
Pretty memorable pham

I mean, if it bothers them it's their loss

reminder that memory-magic is a thing and if you don't completely fuck up like this guy you can get away with anything....ANYTHING

>ywn purge hogwarts with a battle sister
Why even wake up in the morning?

Is this what the average Sup Forumsedditor day dreams about?

I never thought Kenneth Branagh could be so comically over-the-top. Fucking perfect for Lockhart

Harry potter flicks in general were filled with so many talented actors