/trek/

That one random Cardie helmsman edition

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>that universe where the Bajorans are the ones who conquered the Cardassians, not the other way around

>Dukat was Kira's mother's comfort man
oh wow

The mirror universe? At that time they're about to be raped by the Dominion.

A spy no doubt

>ds9
so much fucking babel just get to the war

No the one described here in TNG "Parallels"

wtf delete this

Was it rape?

lol what episode is that?

It was just a friendly shoulder rub between two totally heterosexual male buddies. No homo.

Pretty sure it's Future Imperfect.

...

Get lean
Get fit
Get outta my way
Cardassian fucking shit

He learned from the best.

Test

>get lean
>get fit

reminder that even Picard said that Cardassian children are empty and have no soul
literally nothing wrong in killing them

>lean
>fit
>O'Brien
not so fast, Mr Tubby

What was her problem?

I did some seraching and its actually Parallels, the one where Worf starts experiencing alternative realities. Future Imperfect has a Ferengi helmsman in it which you see when Riker gets trapped in some big planetary holodeck with that child alien and is made to think he's woken up 20 years in the future.

Hot good looking woman married to a fat guy with no career prospect

Why was she always trying to make virgins feel better?

MIIIIIIIIIIIIILES

you're watching it wrong

AYIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Attention spoonheads.

I have your fertile women. Hand over the potatoes or you'll never breed again.

Tiocfaidh ár lá!

>O'Brien gets a job on Cardassia Prime to help rebuild their planet after it gets fucked by the Dominion
>Secretly modifies all transporters so it fucks with their DNA and makes all their offspring sterile
Make it happen, pls

Can imagine Kira now
>Attention Cardassian workers...

I like the slice of life episodes of DS9 the best. Like the one where Jake gets a baseball card. If you concentrate just on the Dominion war you're going to miss a lot of good character development and drama. It's about the journey not the destination.

Is that the Weinstein maneuver?

Ummm... A-attention Bajoran workers.

I made a holosuite program. It's called "Kira's Mother Interspecies Gangbang 053". Y-you can use it if you want.

Uhhh... That is all.

Oh, I also disabled the safety protocols.

My dear doctor how would you like to be in movies?

DS9 really strikes up a good balance of that, actually. I vastly prefer Babylon 5, but that show (especially with a condensed 4th season) really went all in on the conflicts and overall arcs, with a few half-scenes of levity at most, while DS9 had the time and still episodic nature to do both silly and fun stuff (Bada Bing, Bada Bang, Magnificent Ferengi etc) or ones that went to the real, personal lows (that one with the completely cracked Vulcan who killed people with photos that had smiling people, or the episodes of O'brien dealing with the Orions).

>the Federation takes the Chin'Toka system from the Dominion
>establishes the base AR-558
>we even have a whole episode about them
>later on they probably all get killed when the Dominion retakes the system

...

Can I bring friends?

Agree 100%. Comfy DS9 is best DS9.

Bajoran workers, their attention needed
dukat and kira's mom on terok nor
kira's mom, her legs wide open

...

I want to hear O'Brien sing my little armalite.

youtu.be/P8wgrZ6t5BA

What the FUCK was his problem?

why are his ears so big

So he can hear the Cardassian women scream for their lives from a long distance.

Mother of Kira, her will bending. Mother of Kira when the moans echoed.
Dukat of the sown seed.
Terok Nor, when yoked Bajorans Heeded the Call.

Say what you will about voyager, but it had the best character and doctor.

emh>every other character.

>haha what a wholesome episode
>wait what

>That subtle grin at the audience.
That man is perfection.

Perfect well played.

>tfw you will never have a three way with these two foxy grandpas

>could have been a gangster rapper as chief engineer

Bashirfag x Bashir x Garak at STLV
Someone write this fanfic

Today I will remind them about qt Cardie girls

Neither of them were at Vegas this year. I just wanted to suck his dick in a gondola at the Venetian.

I've been thinking about about the writing in Discovery. I've only seen the first 3 episodes, so if something drastic was revealed in E4, I'm in the dark. That said my biggest problem is core concept of the Burnham character. Specifically, why she is Vulcan raised in the first place?

Obviously, the show is going for a "torn between two worlds" thing, but that's what has been done with Spock for decades. The other concept is that she has PTSD/emotional problems surrounding Klingons. That I think could be convoyed without making her Vulcan raised. She would work better as a survivor of a human colony that was destroyed and then became an enlisted starfleet member. Her idea to shoot first at Klingons could be based on her childhood experiences where she sees her parents try to peacefully greet the Klingons before being killed in front of her. Same effect without shoehorning in Sarek.

Next thing is that the pilot episode feels like it is missing a character. Burnham (as a senior enlisted brought in) should have been at odds with the Captain and Saru, but she should never have resorted to violence. She should have instead been a bit more rough and tumble and decided to go behind the captain's back. Her and a character established to be her friend should have beamed over to the Klingon ship while the captain made diplomatic contact. When the klingons started firing they should have overwhelmed the Federation ship, and Burnham aboard the Klingon ship should have worked to stop the attack and her like minded friend should have been killed, causing her to kill the head Klingon. The federation ship still gets destroyed by the Klingons but Burnham's actions bought enough time for away pods to partially launch. This can lead into Saru surviving and him being now awkward around Burnham who is both proven to be a loose cannon and who saved his life.

Burnham gets locked up based on the ship's log of her argument with the captain and the black box of transporter records showing she disobeyed the captain.

Ideally, in my world I'd change things more drastically, but these are ideas that feel like simple polishing of the existing idea and show direction.

There's always next year. Keep practicing!

>pimp my spaceship episode
>Geordi teaches Data how to rap

...

>Implying Data needs help with style.

I'll eat a banana every day.

I love Barclay. Best Trek character.

> Specifically, why she is Vulcan raised in the first place?
this has been bothering me as well. I really don't see any reason for it other than HEY REMEMBER SPOCK WELL HERE'S HIS DAD AND OUR NEW MC WAS RAISED BY HIM. So far there really hasn't been any point where her Vulcan training would've made her more useful than any other intelligent and/or creative member of the crew. Having her backstory just be about the whole Klingons-killed-my-parents deal would have been enough and you can easily build a character from that. Maybe have her be brought up in a more science-y setting by massive nerds, which made her a bit more awkward along with her past trauma. And I agree about her decision to go apeshit on the Klingons should've been based on her experiences and not whatever the fuck was going on there with her and Sarek.

Also, this is another thing that annoys me. I feel like the revelation that Sarek now fucked up raising three children sort of retroactivly sours his character even more. I loved his episodes in TNG and how they showed that deep down he always did love Spock and admired the man he had become, but also how he never could allow himself to show it. Those scenes with Picard were fucking great, but now Discovery going back and basically trying to do the whole Spock business again, this time with a non-Vulcan female, is confusing. It goes along with the question of why Michael was even raised by him - why was Sarek needed by Discovery?

I dunno, it just feels like they're shitting on his character for no reason at all. He's not at all sympathetic in the new show.

>that episode where he became ultra alpha and almost got Troi to fuck him.

I'm sort of able to compartmentalize and ignore the Sarek stuff if I have to. My big issue with Burnham being raised Vulcan is that it makes her entirely flat. Somebody should have realized that a "Vulcan" character is a horrible option for a show trying to have a single main character. It makes Burnham flat and lifeless- except for the odd random line where she has spunk which then seems horribly out of place.

If she were human raised then the show could play her more as somebody from the edge of space where stuff is rougher vs most of Starfleet which is from safe planets. She would be immensely more likeable to audiences which is what the show desperately needs.

Thinking for a bit, in the first episode it could have been really neat to show her and her BFF (who gets killed off) immediately grabbing phaser pistols and putting them on their belts as soon as they recognize they are near Klingons. Maybe just have a bunch of scenes in between where it isn't even verbally mentioned but just there that she geared up and nobody else did. Then have the captain notice the phaser pistol on her belt when there is the arugment in the ready room about what to do. The Captain, as a proper Startfleet officier, can then be agast that one of her crew's immediate response was to grab a gun rather than use diplomacy.

I dunno, this show seems sort of hard to comment on fully because I STILL don't know what the premise is, but the character herself is ass.

...

Why do people shit on 24th century Trek now?
It's become an internet-wide meme since at least 2009.

what do you mean by that? like, people saying the TNG-DS9-VOY era is shit/was never as good as remembered compared to a newly updated (alternative) TOS + now STD?

Literally nobody says that except for STD nutjobs who go overboard and attack all other Treks.

Ever since the first JewJew movie came out people have been endlessly shitting on the TNG-DS9-VOY era, calling it "talky", "preachy", "franchise-killing"

because now people think that ST is communist propaganda or something

If you were to go on TrekBBS you'll see life-long fans say "wow, I just realized that everything that came out in the 90s sucked, why couldn't it always be like TOS/JJ Abrams"

TOS and JJ movies are incredibly different from each other. People who say that haven't watched TOS.

hmm, well I'm a newer fan to Trek so I can't comment on the JJtrek era fandom, but I have seen that sort of talk towards the old shows begin around the time more info about STD started coming out. But then again, it's like this guy said . It's just a very specific group of people.

You'll be surprised. These guys born in the 50s or whatever will tell you the first JJTrek was "better than anything in the franchise since 1979/1982/1986 (pick a year)"
>what is Yesterday's Enterprise (1990)
>what is The Best of Both Worlds (1990)
>what is The Way of the Warrior (1995)
>what is The Visitor (1995)
>etc.

(It's unprovable of course-) Pretty sure a lot of the online talk you see when people hold up STD at the expense of other shows is started and fomented by CBS shills. I don't like being "that guy" but some of the things I've also read are so out there that I discount it. It's either shills or people who have never watched any of the Treks and just use their vague cultural osmosis knowledge to paint a picture of what they *think* old Trek shows were like. In any case it's not worth dwelling on what those idiots think.

I btw like TOS the best, but it's because I have a love for the 60s style of acting that's big and theatrical, and because TOS had hands down the best lighting of all the shows. TNG and DS9 are still GOAT. ENT and VOY are still super fun.

Were they really born then or are they just pretending? Remember, on the internet nobody knows you're a dog.

You want talking? Go watch a Shakespeare play fag. This is Star Trek. I want my green wimmin and pew pew space battles.

woah, finally a nice looking space gun in Star Trek

Bev, dear, just let me put the tip in. Just the tip! This will be the only time, I swear. Oh, come on!

Data x fat Riker fic when? Sounds kind of cute

>I btw like TOS the best, but it's because I have a love for the 60s style of acting that's big and theatrical, and because TOS had hands down the best lighting of all the shows. TNG and DS9 are still GOAT. ENT and VOY are still super fun.
TOS is really fun, I'm still working my way through it, but I appreciate the acting style as well. Also McCoy is best boi, I didn't even realise before watching it how much he actually shits on Spock, thought it was a meme.

>implying he isn't Wesley's father
in hindsight, putting the tip in wasn't really worth it

>franchise-killing

that makes no fucking sense considering those are the bulk of the francise

Yeah, McCoy's acting is great. I actually love the scenes of him doing surgery in Spock's Brain (...yes, that one...). He does a great intense face while being hit some some ultra extreme lighting.

Also, that John Carpenter Whumwhumwum noise in sickbay gives him an intense presence.

>Also, that John Carpenter Whumwhumwum noise in sickbay gives him an intense presence.
yup, the sounds on TOS are really interesting as well. I notice them a lot more than in the other shows (though I guess you could also argue it's because they're replayed all the time, but still).

At least you can still sexually harass Frakes

TOS has much less subtly when it comes to damn near everything. That includes the sounds and the lighting. They have it cranked up to 11 compared to the other shows where those things are much more subdued. Some people find it too campy. I dig the stylization.

The downside is that some stuff like the uniforms are just horribly cheap no matter which way you cut it. Except for those turtlenecks and jackets in The Cage, those were the shit. Too close to Forbidden Planet though, probably why they changed it.

Of all the things JJ Trek did right, casting Carl Urban as Nu-McCoy was spot on.

I don't want to sexually harass him. I just want to go to the Cheesecake Factory with him for a nice dinner.

>that episode where they send Riker to a weight loss center and he starts going crazing and having hallucinations

>Star Trek Discovery Sneak Peek
youtube.com/watch?v=5PgltWGSjKQ

>The Orville Sneak Peek
youtube.com/watch?v=pd1rnASDoUI

Thoughts?

The teaser dialog for Orville was actually more dramatic and resonate than STD and its tryhard epicness.

What was Kirk's problem?

What does he want Spock to pinch, the fucking cage?

>The downside is that some stuff like the uniforms are just horribly cheap no matter which way you cut it.
mhm, the costumes can look really shit if you look at them closer. The formal/Admiral uniforms suffer the most. But from afar they're nice enough and iconic. The simplicity made them easy to replicate on your own and is probably the reason why they're still the main uniforms people imagine when you talk about Star Trek.
>Of all the things JJ Trek did right, casting Carl Urban as Nu-McCoy was spot on.
this too. that was a good casting choice. the others were a bit hit or miss and there's something about Quinto's Spock that I don't like. Pine is fine, but only if you keep in mind he's playing the pop-culture version of Kirk.

Is there a picture like this but of Frakes?

I like the *concept* when it comes to the simplicity of TOS uniforms. Just a solid colored long shirt over a black undershirt. Very simple and easy. The problems were the details- the sewn on irregular Starfleet "badges", the shitty looking cufflinks, and other small oddities. Also the fact that Kirk wore bizarre shit like his karate top half the time.

A modern production that legitimately wanted to follow the TOS aesthetic could easily fix these small, but numerous problems.

Am I literally the only person enjoying both The Orville and Discovery? They fill two different niches.

>Bashirfaggot hasn't written a lewdfic with fat Riker and fat Kirk
get to work, >woman

His stomach looks photoshopped in that pic even though it's not

...

Miles "You can't trust the cardies" O'Brien
Miles "Keiko I saw you in Garak's shop again you know what I think of the God Damn Cardies" O'Brien
Miles "Cardie Killer" O'Brien