B-b-but sir I want to write about Batman

>b-b-but sir I want to write about Batman

nah

Let me tell you something about Batman, Smallville.

Klark you filthy bitch ass nigger pice of shit! This isn't 1938 you cancerball shitlord dick sucker! No one cares about some retarded dressed like a Batman jumping from buildings

WRITE SPORTS FAGGOT NERD

OR I WILL FIRE YOU AND FUCK YOU IN THE ASS

You know how in Marvel comics, Spider-Man takes pictures of himself for a newspaper? What if Clark is doing basically the same thing, reporting on himself, aka BATMAN???

Hmm. He has the right build for it... And he IS constantly disappearing to Gotham...

I could believe it.
He does have the serial-killer vibe of someone who's killed a man with his bare hands.

Literally Jeffery Dahmer. I wouldn't be surprised if he kept dismembered victims frozen in his fridge.

he has a very Patrick Bateman vibe

... o - key.

Cuck.

Clark is DC Comics and the we, the readers, are Perry Black

Can Bateman be Batman?

Bateman Batman

Oh snap!

Whoa-whoa-whoa! How is a reporter going to afford all those wonderful toys? His parents are just farmers too. Batman would have to be someone of means, someone with great wealth and no day job.
Someone like... Oliver Queen.

>Oliver Queen

Ollie is poor in this universe, which is why he won't even exist other than as a cameo and will probably get shot for begin a hippie, just like Jimmy was executed as a spy.

This is indeed a disturbing universe.

>his parent's basement

Really makes you think...

What I don't get is why Clark as assigned the sports beat when the planet has a dedicated sports writer already, and we saw him in Man of Steel.

And that's not even considering the fact that what he wanted to do with Batman wasn't just covering a story, it was writing a damn editorial. So naturally he's gonna be told to fuck off with that.

>we saw him in Man of Steel
Maybe he died during Zod fight.

Clark never went to college or studied how being a reporter on this universe.

He has no idea on what he is doing there.

He probably broke the neck of the guy that did sports there, to take his place.

He was a stringer and was taking any assignments given.

He didn't. Steve and Perry pull the girl out of the rubble.

I told you to write an editorial about why Batman must rape the Joker and you're gonna do it! I'd do it myself but James Gordon's revolutionary idea inspired me too, I'm busy writing an editorial about why Superman must rape Lex Luthor.

No, of course not. It would take someone who had a motive. Clearly, Lex Luthor is backing the bat in order to stifle competition in Gotham.

I'll break your neck if you keep saying bad things about Clark! :^(