Aren't horror movies supposed to be scary??

Aren't horror movies supposed to be scary??

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Yeah, and this was a great example. As long as you werent shitposting and snacking while you "watched" a couple webms or a camrip.

Fuck off

Aren't horror movies supposed to be audible?

Isn't life meant to be lived deliciously?

Objectively wrong

Literally Neon Demon in the woods

What was it lacking? Take your time.

Movies arent scary

>movie
>scary
How is this even possible? It's a fucking movie, it didn't happen. Do people look under their bed at night?

Not when you're older then 16.

Whats with all the reddit plebs suddenly jumping on this movie? It was a fucking awesome horror movie, but morons like you would never appreciate it, since it wasnt full of cheap jumpscares and shitty cgi.

Shouldnt you be watching the new thor, you fucking reddit cancer?

>nothing imagined is scary

This wasn't a horror film. It's a period piece.

>period piece
>real witches

Yeah, nah. It was just a shitty hipster horror movie that scared nobody.

no, they're supposed to be horrific.

it showed horrific things. like smearing a smashed up baby on yourself.

horrific

You must be a child if you still find movies scary. Thats explains your inability to appreciate the great filmmaking that went into this movie. Seriously just fuck off, its faggots like you ruining the board. I half expect you to start whining about pol at this point.

What are your "scary" horror movies then? Clearly you must have exquisite taste if this film is beneath you.
>paranormal activity
>shIT
Ah thats what i thought.

>great filmmaking

You must be a teenager hipster to think this is anything but lowbrow pretentious garbage.

>hipster
Imagine being this retarded.

>Imagine being this retarded.

Don't have to imagine, just read your stupid hipster posts

What horror movies are actually scary? Mario Bava films are excellent, but not scary. Even the 80s classics went for camp and absurdity, which is fine, but is that more scary than the terrifying mis-en-scene and build up of the Witch? What's actually scary?

t. reddit nu-male
Youre actually too stupid to appreciate the film, theres really nothing more to say. Go watch guardians of the galaxy, sweetie.

>le hipster
Will you actually explain why the film is bad or are you just going to keep repeating the same buzzwords since you cant actually do it?

Are you the fag who makes this thread almost every day? The one whos still scared of the dark? The nightlight fag who can never name a scary movie?


t of

What's scary is the characters' superstition and hysteria, and it works because it takes those ideas and the history seriously. Most horror movies would spoil it by revealing too much too soon.

>literally posting reddit memes
Oh my....

Were still waiting for you to tell us what movies you think are scary. I suspect you never will tell us, since youre a reddit pleb

Shit for reddit

Rosemary's Baby of course.

You put your signature at the end of the post, not at the beginning, mr. reddit numale.

It utterly fails at building up any dread yet that's the only thing it's going for. It's a total failure from beginning to end.

Samefag some more, bitch.

The Mothman Prophecies exudes weird dream. There's some unbelievably subtle scenes in that movie.

1922 is literally better than this shit in every way, and it's not even horror.

>another reddit reaction image
>naming one movie which would never be criticized by anyone
>mr. reddit numale
Sorry, try again sweetie. Oh and your film analysis is laughably incorrect. How much glue did you sniff before coming up with that? This is a waste of my time, im arguing with a literal retard from reddit.

I'd like to know the prequel of how they acquired satan the goat instead.

>dude im just gonna throw away my soul and join satan and his witch cultists lmao
What a dumb movie

>watching vvitch
>qt ayy lmao cleavage scene
>turn it off and fap
>havent returned since

Feel ashamed tbqh

Just because you dont understand it, doesnt mean its dumb. Youre the same as an idiot flipping through a math textbook thinking its all stupid bs since you dont understand it.

>nothing fucking happens the whole movie
>everything is brown and grey
>for some reason all the voices are super-quiet but it does the shitty thing where the soundtrack gets super-loud so you have to keep the volume low
also what the fuck did people like about this

>naming a good movie doesn't count
>continued white noise bitching
>sweetie

Looks like we got ourselves a tumbrlette.

Embarrassing

I understood it just fine. But it just wasn't a good movie. The pacing was shit, the jump-scare where the witch comes again was awful, not to mention her make-up. The dad dying was dumb and clunky. The point of her sending the boy back as a messenger was pointless. Them not even attempting to get help was dumb. And her just on the spot deciding to join satan was dumb. She didn't even try to get away. No teenage girl, or anyone would just stay after their whole family was murdered. They cared more about wanking to "accuracy" than they did making a movie.

>inb4 walloftext

The witch is only liked by pussies scared of jumpscares

Run away where? To the village which they were banished from? They were in the middle of nowhere with no food to eat, she doesn't have any choice whatsoever other than to kill herself

>hah i got btfo and dont have an argument so heres my 3rd shitty reddit image oh also le tumblr haha am i fitting in?
How are you this much of a faggot and havent killed yourself yet? Tell us which movies you think are scary, i highly dont youve even seen rosemarys baby, because if you did youd be whining about how shit it was too

Usually most of the people complaining about the witch wanted more jump scares because it was too boring, nothing happened.

So it was a bad movie because you disagree with their actions, which were mostly logical and befitting of the time period? Youre a fucking pleb

>still not a single intelligent thing said
>can't tell the difference between a good movie and this trite garbage

>Watch The Witch with sister
>She complains that it wasn't scary

>Watch The Wailing with sister
>Literally gets angry because "It doesn't make any sense"
>Also complains that it wasn't scary

>Watch Mulholland Drive with sister
>Get to the failed murder scene
>She starts to get frustrated because "I don't know what the fuck is happening"

>Watch IT with sister
>She loves it
>Only complaint is that she wishes it was longer

how do i get my sister to appreciate and enjoy kino?

No one is "scared" by jumpscares, you just involuntarily react to a loud sound, it might aswell be a disney cartoon.
That's why normalfaggots love jumpscares, they think they get scared, say "heh that was spooky" and then immediately proceed doing whatever inane shit they were doing before and forgetting they experienced anything at all.

I think they'll be a little understanding of a lonesome girl on her own, having watched her family killed, on the verge of death. The whole reason they got kicked out was because the dad followed the bible more differently, which could have also been a thing if they had brought the witch to the settlement.

I just think the movie was a wasted opportunity, and again they spend more time at museums, than they did thinking about a compelling plot.
>logical
No, i don't like the movie because it's bad and thew away all of its concepts, and used them terribly. Even the best scene where the boy starts screaming before he dies and everyone looses it, was weak.

Daily reminder that OP is an actual mentally challenged spamming turboautist who keeps making the same exact thread every single day with a bunch of meaningless overly general "it's boring not scary xD" posts
archive.4plebs.org/tv/search/image/YMI7_bjrDHuJvOFTpVkJuQ/

>I think they'll be a little understanding of a lonesome girl on her own,
Are you retarded? "A little understanding" in 16th century New England? You are aware that people back then burned/hanged entire villages of females for something far less than a runaway sinner girl who maybe is cursed and maybe killed her whole family.
This must be bait

>far less than a runaway sinner girl who maybe is cursed and maybe killed her whole family.
Like I said, wasted opportunity because they could have explored that concept as well. Satan could have even tricked her to go instead so he could kill more people or get more witches.

Every other scene is just full of wasted ideas.

Everyday, this faggot posts the same thread.

People want to get scared with horror movies, not a random snooze fest with some bullshit meaning nobody cares about

Compared to the witch... That doesn't even make you react or get scared or feel anything other than boredom

>Satan could have even tricked her to go instead so he could kill more people or get more witches.
Sounds pretty damn retarded. So your idea of a "good plot" is just a bunch of ebin twists and slasher kills? Who cares about family relations, character development, paranoia etc when there can be more epicc satan kills right?
There is a reason why you're not an actual screenwriter, these posts are just embarassing

"Boring" is not a valid argument, it only says what your mood was while watching the film.
Same as saying "it was fun", that does not indicate anything about the actual quality of the film whatsoever.

I felt completely transported to that time period, i believed everything I saw on-screen, I was unsettled and entranced in it. At no point was I ever even slightly bored, I wouldn't watch the film 3 times now if I was.

plot Device != desired outcome
I want the plot to move forward somehow so interesting things can happen. It's not like the movie had any character development in the first place.
>lets kill the father and son dynamic
>oh no the mother is a cunt
>the little twins are brats
>everyone might be satan
>let's just disown my daughter off accusations from little kids

I could literally go on for hours about the copious amount of shit in this movie.

>gets btfo
>n-no ur dumb
Ahaha what a fucking faggot. Back omto reddit, you double digit iq cum gargler

Its probably hopeless. My sister also likes shit movies.

Listing out plot points in a blatantly braindead overly general manner is no argument forming. You could say the same thing for every film ever.

Literally every single character changes from the start of the narrative till the end, you can be delusional and spew meaningless points all you want

>Literally every single character changes from the start of the narrative till the end,
Not meaningfully though, the mom and twins are walking tropes. The dad is the only interesting character and they kill him off in the shittiest way possible. The daughter was okay, but ultimately useless.

I've given so many points to this movie being shit, and all you've done is throw out insults and strawmans. it's okay to like a shit movie user, but pretending is pretty sad.

>I've given so many points to this movie being shit
Not that guy but you really havent. All youve done is list things about the characters/plot you disliked with a few genuine criticisms thrown in. Not enough to explain how the movie was shit. By your criticisms most movies would be shit.

The daughter's arc tied the entire plot together, if you think she was a useless character you missed the point

>I've given so many points to this movie being shit
user just naming film elements and saying they are "shit" is not valid argument forming. Same goes for just naming film element and calling thrm "great". Say why is it bad exactly, what is badly executed in those parts

Good movies don't waste their plot points.
>The Witch
>starts out good, we see her once as a savage
>first abduction is good
>meeting with the son is where it jumps the shark
>complete change in tone, the witch is now a generic disney villain
>the next time we see her, it's a jump-scare which is the antithesis of the movie, due to it trying to subvert tropes

>The family
>half are tropes
>father/son which was set up as important is killed off for a lazy "theyve all gone mad scene", that also was used as a foreshadowing device
>the twins are literally only used to throw in your face that satan is the goat without really saying it until the end
>the mom, again does nothing but the same old crazy mom stuff, never anything meaningful with her daughter or anyone

Instead of developing any of those, they just throw them away in favor of shock value. And no fucking way, is a seasoned farmer going to die by a fucking goat and then wood fall on him. It was fucking stupid.

>imb4 lmao autism

>seasoned farmer
All he could do was chop wood.

Well the witch cursed their crops, and It's safe to say he was probably a farmer in England. It just felt like they had the ending but no way to fit the dad in there so they just decided to lazily kill him off.

The movie was utterly boring. Using that time period in england was a mistake for the setting. Who actually appreciates a time where almost no culture exists? Place it in china and it will be more interesting.

>And no fucking way, is a seasoned farmer going to die by a fucking goat
But user that's not just a goat, it's a literal evil demon black goat, literally Satan himself rammed him.

I sincerely hope this is bait

The whole scene was clunky, and felt forced.
In a moment like that, they were all filled with adrenaline too.
So i go back to: they had their ending idea before the rest of the movie was written.

Adrenaline doesn't mean shit if you're being rammed by the fucking Devil

>rammed by the fucking Devil
The movie was relatively grounded though. The goat didn't appear special at all, nor did the scene imply it could over-power the dad. He just sort of stumbled about and didn't put up a fight. Now maybe it could also work if they assumed we knew they were weak from hunger, which is /plausible/. But even then, there was barely any struggle.

>movie

You are all in a contract with me now

Boring movie

Yeah, I didn't find it scary either. I will probably say the scariest part was when she spoke with the goat. His whisper was just... unnerving. Other than that, I've been through worse.

That said, the acting was really good. Namely with the lead actress.

>look mom, i posted it again
kill yourself

See here

>this guy's directing a Nosferatu remake
tentatively hyped

Shit you're cool

I said the movie was boring no that I was in a bored mood

To you, of course

why the FUCK is it VVITCH

What did you mean by this? Why are you afraid of moving images?

>ask for horror movie recommendation
>get sub par drama
Every time on Sup Forums

>didn't shit yourself with fear at The Witch
pleb detected

Yeah being scared of shitty drama is what us patricians do

Probably bait but otherwise unironically visit a doctor of some sort.

Normal adults are afraid of movies?

Yes you sheltered autist

Not with based Ralph Ineson and his awesome voice no.

Boring movie. FACT!!

what a fucking shit thread. i'm not even gonna post hre

Kyd

>rosemary's baby
Epitome of unscary "horror" for hipsters.

Why do numales hate jumpscares so much?

Jumpscares are for women and plebeians.

This. I've seen plenty of horror movies, but I think about that scene more than any other film. Still creeps me out.

No, you are just a contrarian

the wailing is fucking garbage user, IT is better.