ITT - Celebrities who have never committed a crime

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Other urls found in this thread:

web.archive.org/web/20160720045115/http://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2016/06/16/482323615/fbi-asks-for-tips-in-decades-old-cold-case-of-golden-state-killer
web.archive.org/web/20111230164816/http://www.marcad.net/mrcd61_20_18.html
youtube.com/watch?v=cWjrS4uftXQ
twitter.com/NSFWRedditImage

He killed his wife and he will kill again.

>Hilary is perfectly health
>t. Patton
ey if dis nigga so good at keeping a womans health in check how come his wife dead

This man.

Oswalt being a moron and a killer are two different things. He's definitely a moron, but the "he killed his wife" bullshit is retarded alt-right nonsense because he said some mean things on twitter.

>wife dies suddenly from an OD
>1 year later the goblin marries a woman far out of his league, a complete fucking upgrade

>pic related

seems legit

I don't know who this is but I fucking hate Patton Oswald. He gets shimmied into cameo roles all the time and no one knows why

You can just picture him murdering his wife while "Yours Truly, 2095" plays in the background, will be kino when finally filmed

This would be great without the nigger vernacular but I'll give you a 1/10 for having a pulse

Did I hit a nerve, Mr Oswalt?

i only take my doses of anger over twitter, then create conspiracy theories based on that
please direct my way in the form of a tweet

His wife researched the golden state killer.
web.archive.org/web/20160720045115/http://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2016/06/16/482323615/fbi-asks-for-tips-in-decades-old-cold-case-of-golden-state-killer

This is a picture of his father:

web.archive.org/web/20111230164816/http://www.marcad.net/mrcd61_20_18.html

His whereabouts match up perfectly with all the killings.

Haha literally me but with darker skin. BASED!!!!!!

I think you underestimate what would bring a person to take another life. Domestic homicide is the most common type.

I think Patton has such an inflated ego and deep insecurities where he'd definitely kill his wife to marry the upgrade that he did not even a year later. His house apparently had a bunch of pills, and he is known to have had a coke problem in the past.

You need to watch more Cold Case / Forensic Files episodes man.

I bet Mr. Oswalt was having an affair with Meredith and just became infatuated with the woman. She is about 2 light years out of his league.

we're all aware of the conspiracy theory, user
doesn't make it any less retarded

OJ_Simpson.jpeg

oswalt, go "sleep until you wake up" okay? that is what you told your wife before she died right?

Charlize looking over his shoulder like she knows what he did.

Charlize put the gun down.

that wasn't in the form of a tweet, user

more than that. His wife "od" from 3 different supplies of drugs, hers, his and then illegal drugs from an unknown source. His claim was she only took a xanax for bed and claimed he had no idea she was a drug problem despite living together. In the morning after she takes the pill, he's gone from 6am to atleast 3pm. All that time he doesn't once check his wife.

>There's another working theory that Patton was David Cross' accomplice in the "Ching Chong Ching Chong" racial attack perpetrated 7 to 8 years ago

>The second "Ching Chong" was actually Mr Oswalt

my parents have been married 20 years, they don't fucking call each other every afternoon while they're at work unless, y'know, there's something they need to communicate. Like "ayo I scored some food at work bringing that shit home" or "ayo could you get some mother fucking apples on the way home nigga"

Kek just imagine it

they didn't have half a store of prescription drugs laying around either

His wife found out that he was raping women so he killed her.

Patton Oswald has a taste for blood

aka: based BIBLEMAN

youtube.com/watch?v=cWjrS4uftXQ

btw, go to 45:08 into video for absolute kino

Redpill me on this conspiracy theory

Prescription? No.

My mother carries a fucking pharmacy of over the counter shit in her purse though, and they have shit stashed in their cars. Mostly anti-acids.

This thread is bullshit, everyone drives over the speed limit sometimes.

NOOOO

NOOOO

WHY

NOOOO


nice

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His wife is writing a book about a serial killer. She is stressed out. She takes Xanax, sleeps in, Patton puts a coffee spiked with fentanyl to her bed, brings his daughter to school, waits a few hours until she is certainly dead, call EMTs.

His father matches the description of the killer. He had military experience, like the killer. They lived in CA and when they move to Virginia the killings in CA stopped.

Exactly

I hate this example. Apart from Ferris and WarGames, he did NOTHING (lion king doesn't count). Name one good movie with him apart from these two. Inspector Gadget? Godzilla? He's a nobody. He got lucky once with ferris.

*besides murdering their wife

Hey he murdered his wife so he could marry someone else a month later.

The Producers

the cable guy, the freshmen, election.

also can't tell if this is bait
>aside from his 3 best movies which are also some of the best of all time name something he hasn't done!
>he's a nobody!

autism

He was in manchester by the sea lol

Inspector Gadget you dumb nigger

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>a shitty remake
playing a minor character
>I don't know how to read
he made these films BEFORE the car accident. that's the point retard

god that kid is ugly

It started as a Broadway adaptation

people are going to think that poor girl has down's syndrome when she's older, but its just shitty genes

Poor thing never had a chance.

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I love seeing strong genes like that. She's gonna be a funny adult.

She looks exactly like him. It's scary.

eat shit, whife murderer

This(though he was charged with verbal assault I think)

Also everyone in this pic