Fuck this shit. Really, fuck this shit

Fuck this shit. Really, fuck this shit.

How is it that even in-universe the "Aquaman is lame" jokes are perpetuated? What the hell even started them?

Namor never gets shat on like this in-universe.

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>What the hell even started them?

Actually, I can totally imagine Black Manta spending his spare time creating new shitty Aquaman memes to spread on Facebook and 9gag.

Two Reasons:
1. DC itself never tried to cull the Aquaman jokes because he never made major money for them until the New 52 or back in the Hook Hand Days. When WB told them they're making an Aquaman movie, they decided to replace his character wholesale with Hawkman acted by a Samoan rather than tell people to stop making the jokes.

2. The Surface World has no idea how dangerous Atlantis is. The only time they saw a glimpse of it was during Throne of Atlantis arc, but that was only a major problem in coastal cities and Gotham, who deal with crazy shit every two hours. The public shrugged it off but all of the nations in the world took notice.

You'd think that with China making such a big deal out of trying to own all the seas surrounding it, Aqua-man would be a top priority.

That was my line of thought too. Aqua-Man of China would be an insanely valuable asset.

Mmm, I'll admit that I've followed DC a lot less since New 52 so I'm unfamiliar with how much coverage Aquaman has had in the new timeline. But surely he hasn't been so ineffectual that he's seen as a joke? Especially by government officials with extensive resources of information who'd absolutely know about the Throne of Atlantis events?

That, and Atlantis and the US almost went into full-out war with each other recently in the Rebirth series.

>. The Surface World has no idea how dangerous Atlantis is.
Like, disruption of overseas trade alone would ruin the global economy, and nobody could do shit about it due to surface worlders having all told pretty shit submarines and virtually no ability to field sub-aquatic infantry.

Well, of course they wouldn't make jokes like that about Namor. He has powers outside of water, like the tiny wings on his ankles that let him fly. Does Aquaman have wings on his ankles? I think not. I bet he couldn't even inflate like a puffer fish.

...Manta actively spreading Aquaman sucks meme to shit on Aquaman's reputation, too.
A hobby he took during one of his prison stays, as he wasn't doing anything illegal noody ever cared about stpping him

>Namor never gets shat on like this in-universe.- 8 posts and 1 image reply shown.
Namor's first big public appearance was trying to drown New York with a gigantic tidal wave and duking out with the then-strongest hero around, the original Human Torch.

Also, women crave his atlantidean dong, finely outlined by his speedos.

Japan gets mosts of the givant monsters

Part of what bugs me about Aquaman comics (at least recent ones) is that nobody really fleshed out just how fucking huge and powerful Atlantis must be. Every time we see it it looks like Arthur's a king of a small town or a village, rather than a force which controls 70% of the planet.

bitch didnt see a point because aquaman is the aquaman of the whole fuckin world

True but I doubt that was the intent of the line.

But the dude is the ruler of like 70% of the world.

As we often see in sci-fi, writers tend to have a rather poor sense of scale. The ocean is fucking huge, not just in surface area, but depth. Around 10,000 ft maximum, holding the vast majority of life on the planet. Yeah.

Atlantis surely doesn't actually feasibly control the entire ocean though, right?

Who the fuck else has an ability to control any of the ocean? It's practically all the kingdom of Atlantis by default.

They do.

There are insurrections across the kingdom and so they knock them the fuck down. But the ocean is his and his peoples domain. Atlantis is Rome, the ocean is the roman empire.

There would have to be hundreds, if not thousands of outposts fucking everywhere though.
And maybe comic universe is different, but there's quite a bit of the ocean that is actually claimed by countries. I doubt they'd just cede that sovereignty because a flashy git in an orange and green jumpsuit told them to

except the ocean is apparently mostly empty of human life

Not really. If nobody is competing with you for your kingdom then you don't need outposts there. It's like if America had somehow claimed the moon as sovereign territory. Maybe it's not exactly enforceable but who the fuck else is there to even bother trying to take it?

So the solution is to give Aquaman more cleavage, right?

>maybe comic universe is different
I wonder if you read them.... would you find the answers you seek?

why the fuck are you here?

We use the ocean every fucking day. At any given moment there are hundreds of ships out there, puttering around.

PAD did it. Hell, he straigth-up wrote Blonde Namor.

It wasn't enough.

It's the dong, I tell you.

I don't read Aquaman comics. I do read New Super-Man though, so that's why I clicked on the thread

Id say that this makes more sense, as they operate in China. Aquaman, however strong he is on land, is stronger in the water, no? So they could just be saying that the doctor didnt see the point in an aquatic fighter on the land.

>Using
>Competing for control of the kingdom

These are not the same thing at all. Atlantis merely tolerates us being there until it decides it doesn't want us in that particular bit of ocean, then heads over there to tell us to fuck off and we can't do a damn thing about it.

We've learned by now, mostly at least, that it's better to just allow Atlantis to operate as it does and they let us do our thing.

Pointy ears, small shorts and magnum dong, then? Because I'm sure the ears are part of it, it's the same thing that makes elves hot.

>The Chinese don't desire total control of the South China Sea

Yeah, okay

I never said that, I said if theyre stationed on land then the doctor might not care for an aquatic fighter.

I hope Yang changes his mind because China is a maritime nation.

I don't think it's even the matter of having no sense of scale, but simply the fact that portraying a whole society is fuckoff different from portraying a superhero team and their extended supporting cast.

This is primarily a criticism of Johns, who really only knows how to write superheroes already living in our society, so when it comes to fleshing out a different one he is hopelessly lost, and his Atlantis is either brushed aside as unimportant or barely fleshed out enough to affect the image of a small neighborhood, rather than a whole culture.

This is also a problem I had with his GL.

I imagine he will, he seem to be gradually introducing other league knockoffs, if Lantern Academy is anything to go by.

super friends

Yeah, but that's basically saying that the director of a government department centred around making China more self-sufficient and capable of defending its own people, territory and ideals somehow doesn't think that the maritime territories of China are worth anything, and that literally nobody in the Chinese government who are aware of this operation pointed this out to her, even with all the current desires to control the SCS.

It paints the Chinese government as incredibly moronic for the sake of a hurr hurr aquaman is laem joke.

Comicbook writers are hacks

>who the fuck else is there to even bother trying to take it?
I feel like China is petty and powerful enough to. Maybe Russia.

Eventually, maybe, sure. But for now the moon is the ocean, and America is Atlantis, in this comparative example. For now, even without having thousands of outposts guarding all corners of the kingdom, the whole ocean is essentially under the control of Atlantis because nobody else is there claiming it as part of their own territory. Or at least not with enough force to be able to control it against even a small Atlantean skirmish force that might be dispatched to take it back.

To be "fair", that's not exclusive to Johns by any means. Many many writers are terrible at properly portraying a fictional nation. Culture is a large, and complex idea that encompasses everything from etiquette, art, media, demographical expectations, stereotypes, attitudes toward various subjects, fashion, economic systems, etc.

That takes a lot of time, thought, and effort to figure out how a country made of whole cloth works. And this is superhero comics, so you're usually shit out of luck regarding anything not involving cape fighting.

Like how they are doing Avery, maybe they will have an Asian Aquaman, just not created by Dr. Omen

I do agree, I singled out Johns because he set the tone for the new Aquaman, and because I think he's inordinately bad at it.

And because I like bashing Johns.

They could've just said something like, "Because Atlantis is not in the Indian Ocean."

Don't mind me, just posting the objecyively best version of Aquaman.

Totally OUTRAGEOUS opinion.

How can you be so wrong? It's just OUTRAGEOUS.

I agree, but he kinda joins Momoa in the "screw it let's just write a completely different character" bin. He's basically Incredible Herc with less fucking.

I really wanted one of those jacked on Smallville back in high school
I still do now, it's just a pain finding them.

He's the best because he knows that he's awesome so all of the jokes roll off his back. You can't help but like a guy with that much confidence, something most incarnations of Aquaman don't have.

It's hard to escape the public perception with the fucking fish joke being so ingrained in their minds, so they need to do something drastic and dial it back later

youtube.com/watch?v=yE8C1WWixgc

I actually really liked Aquaman on Smallville for some strange reason.

I was young and foolish.

Writers in general have it much harder imagining humans living in space than underwater. Especially underwater in the middle of the ocean. And since humans don't live in the water and cannot settle it -- like even the most hostile deserts and mountains and jungles have been -- people naturally underestimate the value of sea trade.

>Are you aware of exactly how much ocean connects to China?
Well over a thousand kilometers

In theory yeah. But the Justice League is basically guaranteed to side with the surface world no matter what. Meaning that Atlantis have no chance of winning in a conflict.

What actually is the character of Aquaman? What would you say are his defining characteristics?

This is because Namor has a really distinctive personality and feel compared to many superheroes.

I don't dislike Aquaman, but when I try to summarize him, I realize he's just absolutely ridiculously boring as a character. He has the Default Superhero Personality and not much else going, which is probably why the DCEU are doing him as an edgy sea Khal in the hopes that GoT hype can prop him up.

It should also be noted that Namor is one of the most powerful superhumans on 616 Earth, whereas Aquaman is kinda overshadowed in every way by how OP guys like Superman and Wonder Woman are. It's much harder to be taken seriously as a flying strong guy in DC when you can't throw a paper airplane without hitting fucking Superman or one his various clones/cousins/etc.

I'd say he tries to keep his superhero life separate from his personal life. He's interested in going in, getting the job done, and leaving; he doesn't stay to celebrate his success very often. The recent Rebirth story also showed that he's very proud and feels like he has to prove himself as a king and a League member.

Can't be that, it's cannon that Namor has a small dong.

Supers aren't as much of an ace when you remember that Atlantis has institutionalized magic use. Not to mention having a few of their own supers. Just Mera alone would be especially tough to deal with.

>he never read the chronicles of atalantis.

Maybe he stuffs? Because those short sure look full as hell.

But don't readers like it when comic book characters talk like comic book fans?? There was a choice bit during McDuffie's JLA Run.

>Black Canary: Man, our remaining group is worse that our Detroit roster.
>Vixen: Trust me, nothing is worst that the Detroit roster.

It's funny!... because most of her teammates died.

>Vixen is an insensitive cunt
What a shock. It's like she keeps finding new ways to suck.

>listening to a fat seahag in prison

>When your hometown squad fucking sucks

Well, Namor is a funny asshole

So of course people like him

It's funny because nobody cares about justice league detroit.

it's funny because nobody gave a shit about JL Detroit

Comic *fans* don't care about JL Detroit and laugh it off. Having the characters themselves do it is a bit too meta. Imagine if fire fighters or police in different cities gave each other crap for not being popular enough.

Aquaman Rebirth said the Super Friends cartoon exist inuniverse. Arthur didn't mind because it's better people think he's a joke than then fearing Atlantis for being the largest country in the world

>Imagine if fire fighters or police in different cities gave each other crap for not being popular enough.
They do.

Namor doesn't get them because he isn't lame. He's a scary motherfucker who has invaded the surface as many times as he's saved the world. The only sea life Namor controls are sea monsters.

Namor is one of the best comic book characters ever created. He's arguably the first anti-hero in comics, and he is not someone you fuck around with.

He has the highest death-count out of nearly everyone in the Marvel Universe.

These guys get it.

>There is no Aquaman of China.

Well...yeah? Isn't the whole point that he's king of the entire ocean?

>Namor never gets shat on like this in-universe.
gee maybe because he's a hot head who used to pull shit like this constantly

>Namor is a scary motherfucker
user he has tiny little ankle wings.

...

Remember that time he flooded Wakanda?
Good times.

darkseid wears a skirt

Sue is such a slut.

>Namor is cool because he's an edgy tryhard.

>I'm a retard

Anti-life is getting a glimpse of Darkseid's testicles as he sits on your couch.
>basic instinct style

Because most of the MU is lamer than Aquaman so there's not much of a standard.

He did in time and tide

An edgy try hard with a cleavage, a huge dick and pointy ears. Haven't you been listening at all?

They really aren't.

Aquaman is extremely lame. I'm tired of this weird contrarian movement of people trying to make out that he's some great underappreciated hero. Liking him in Brave and the Bold does not mean you have to pretend his canon iteration is worth defending.

He barely has a personality.

youtu.be/WYQ3O8U6SMY