Aladdin (2018)

Would you watch this version of Aladdin?

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Hell yes. As long as there is gratuitous nudity.

>Using a whore that got popular with a sex tape with multiple people as a stand in

The market for trashy shit women like and Disney are not the same crowd.

Actor, yes. Actress, no.

>A half Egyptian and a half Armenian playing Persians
Fucking White Washing.

Moon Knight when?

Never because Moon Knight is just a jew merc in egypt land.

He's too ugly to be a Disney prince and she's too lewd to be a Disney princess.

I'm pretty sure they'd cast the guy from slum dog millionaire. Unless they actually go out of their way to cast Bollywood actors.

>He's too ugly to be a Disney prince

Hahaha no. He is a qt. Would bang the fuck out of him and make him my wife.

Would he have the charisma to play Aladdin?

Aladin isn't Persian. In Disney he's a from a fictional nondescript place in the middle east and in the original story he was from China.

No. Rami is qt.

But he's too pale skinned regardless of what he is. People would bitch.

WHITEWASH
WHITEWASH
TRIGGERED

Wait, which is which? Everyone seems to know who the guy is, how out of the loop am I?

he was just in a reasonably popular show and a reasonably popular video game

Kim is the Armenian

I haven't had cable in a long while.

Also oh shit, Kim Kardashian is still relevant?

it was an Amazon Prime show which is taking off in a big way for some reason

and no, her main claim to relevancy now is "Kanye's wife/baby momma"

>gratuitous nudity.
Aladdin's for the kids.

>a Kardashian

You couldn't pay me enough to.

When has not having charisma ever stopped someone from getting a lead roll before?

Shut up, Boco. Nobody wants your money anyway.

>Kim Kardashian is still relevant?
Reality tv is a cancer that never goes away. Also helps that she's married to one of the most popular artists in america at the moment.

Mr Robot is on USA m8.

Yes to the first, no to the second.

If it's a porn, I'm in..

I know which he is because of this.

He's also got a pretty unique face I think. So he's not too hard to recognize.

>Dan Lin, who was a producer on Holmes, is also producing what Disney calls a 'nontraditional' take on Aladdin

It's shit, no Robin Williams, nobody will be able to capture the charm of characters like Aladdin, Genie, the Sultan, Iago, or Jasmine, the Genie, Carpet, Abu, and Iago are gonna be shitty fucking CGI, they'll probably try to shoehorn in some anti-Trump shit about the travel ban and that brown people can do no wrong, the songs are going to be butchered, they're going to ruin my favorite Disney movie, and I'm mad.

Then you better pray Beauty and the Beast tanks.

Jim Carrey is a good sub for Robin Williams
Jay Pharoh too

>gay autistic hacker plus Barbie's vaguely ethnic friend

I'd sooner watch an orphanage burn down.

>kardashians
>white

>half Egyptian
since when is Rami mixed?
And Aladdin and Jasmine aren't Persian, they're just Arab, Armenians and Egyptians are Arabs.

Indian and Arab aren't the same thing.

Kim is a bimbo (not necessarily an insult) so this movie wouldn't work and if they tried it'd be goofy as fuck

delete this post and yourself.

>Rami Malek
I will watch anything he's in.
>bitch
no.

Rami Malek could work for Aladdin. Your choice for Jasmine is fucked, though.

Ashman's original version of Jasmine was a bimbo.

youtube.com/watch?v=lsC98YQb6vM

Rami is a very languid dude he doesn't have the energetic presence needed for the role, and Kim K is a fuckdoll, so no

>bitch
haha lol! epic.

The Beauty and the Beast remake made me lose any hope of having a hot Jasmine. Maybe a generally attractive, slightly above average Jasmine, but not the Jasmine that kickstarted my and countless others' puberties.

Also, I'd only watch a movie with Kim in it if she gets naked and is pretty close to naked the whole time. Actually, I'd wait for someone else to watch it and compile all the hottest scenes.

Ehh idk that's more of a diva not that there's a huge difference, the most significant one being that a bimbo is overly sexual which was my key point

Not really kid's movie material

Yes, sex is evil and will corrupt children.
Violence and destruction is a-okay though.

What about the snake in Jungle Book that tried to rape the boy?

does not look street rat enough

>implying both dont have the same schickt
look i love Robin Williams, but the man is gone, so he's gotta be replaced

Kardashian isn't an actress
Frida Pinto is real choice

Hell no, Aladdin is suppose to be cute.

Would it even be possible to make an Aladdin movie without parents groups losing their shit at the potential Disney Muslim indoctrination movie?

Alabama would have that shit banned ten times faster than Beauty and the Beast

>Dev Patel as Aladdin.
>Freida Pinto as Jasmine.
>Mark Strong as Jafar.
>Ben Kingsley as the Sultan.
>Dwayne Johnson as the Genie.
>Gilbert Gottfried as Iago.

Jay Pharaoh can do impressions, but outside of that he doesn't have an iota of talent or heart.

Jim Carrey could do it, but I'm not sure.

JASMINE AND ALADDIN ARE NOT INDIAN.

>Americans giving a shit about anything but brown skin.

Fox News would take a live action Aladdin as another War on American culture

>'nontraditional' take on Aladdin

Translation: Making a big budget live action movie starring nothing but arabs is a risk we're not willing to take so we're gonna make sure we get some whites up in this.

No one knows who keny is outside America, Kardashian is a famous whore in the western world.

>amazon prime show
it airs on the USA network you idiot

They were Persian. Aside from Arabian nights everything else was Persian

that's incorrect.
Persian's aren't even Arabs.

Rami Malek is actually 7/8 Coptic Egyptian and 1/8 Greek.

>Coptic
NICE.

Aladdin and Jasmine are "Chinese" people from an Arab tale of unknown origin. Armenians aren't Arabs and some Egyptians don't consider themselves Arabs either (Copts).

I mean to be fair aren't Arabs technically just people from the Arabian Peninsula? Egyptians are North Africans.

Where are the brown people?

Is Kim going to show me her big fat ass in some revealing Arabian panties? Because otherwise I'm not interested.

No. Arabs are a pan-ethnic group. What matters most is language and culture. Egyptians are North Africans but Arabization has led to many of them adopting Arab identity and joining Arab societies. They only have about 15% Arab ancestry (this is much lower for Copts) but their use of Arabic as a language and participation in Arab culture has had them being accepted in the Arab world.

They are both. Most Egyptians tend to stress Egyptian identity over Arab or African. Copts on the other hand detest Arabization and only identify as Egyptian and African.

>Is Kim going to show me her big fat ass in some revealing Arabian panties?
possibly.

someone should commission this.

>PRAISE ALLAH

Good thing the original came out before 9/11. They would never get away with that line today.

>Persians
I'm almost positive that if we're talking about the Disney version, Agrabah is supposed to be somewhere in Arabia, not Persia, and if we're talking about the original, Aladdin was supposed to be Chinese. Yes really.

>Aladdin and Jasmine aren't Persian, they're just Arab

Wrong. Completely fucking wrong. In the original story they are Chinese Muslims.

Multiple people thinking Aladdin's characters are Persian or Arab. People think Mr Robot is an Amazon Prime show. People thinking no one outside the US knows who Kanye is.

This thread is hilarious on multiple levels

THIS IS A DISNEY ADAPTATION OF A DISNEY MOVIE, WE ALL KNOW THEY WERE ORIGINALLY CHINESE, BUT IT'S NOT RELEVANT BECAUSE WE'RE SPEAKING IN A VERY SPECIFIC CONTEXT.

FUCK OFF.

Because he won an Emmy?

Armenians aren't Arabs, they're """non-white""" Caucasians, who are literally from the Caucasus mountains.

Do you want someone to draw Kim Kardashian AS Jasmine, or do you just want a drawing of Jasmine with a big ass?

>all those Indians

Let's be fair to dumb user. Aladdin and Jasmine look like light skinned Indians/Pakistanis, especially their noses which are always drawn like that for Indian characters in TV shows.

>Coptic

He's a little fair to be Coptic, I thought they were a little bit darker than that. Still, except for the Greek ancestry which probably gave him his eye color, no one can tell him he's not a "Real Egyptian", especially not Afrocentrists and Nordists.

Chinese Muslims eh? So they were Turkish Chinese people?

>He's a little fair to be Coptic

How? I know two female Christian Copts at my workplace. They have the same skin color as him, and one of their kids has colored eyes (the father is also Copt).

Kim, I'm sure there's a lot of drawings of Princess Jasmine with a big ass.

Uyghurs?

Malik may look young, but he's still too old.
And Jasmine really shouldn't be a gigantic whore.

Alabama banned Beauty and the Beast?

I thought they'd be into fucking an oxbear.

>And Jasmine really shouldn't be a gigantic whore.
she canonically is, Aladdin is a cuck.

>He's a little fair to be Coptic, I thought they were a little bit darker than that.
While Copts are generally darker, they come in all shades. Egypt has a long ass history so they've been conquered and trading with other ethnic groups for ages. This eventually leads to intermarrying. Copts do share more DNA with other people from the African continent such as Ethiopians and Nubians and they have a lower percentage of Arab DNA due to their refusal to convert to Islam or be Arabized.

Yeah those guys.

Oh okay, my mistake. I met a family of Copts a while back and they were light brown, but it's pretty foolish of me to assume one ethnic group only has one color.

So really, the Greek ancestry doesn't matter.

Most Copts actually have some Greek ancestry considering the Greek presence there until the 1950s. Rami is just one such example. Egyptian Muslims on the other hand would have avoided marriage with Greeks due to the difference in religion.

Rami probably has more Greek ancestry than 1/8 if you go further back but there's no point in splitting precise percentages like that. He's still Egyptian.

Greeks are black.

t. Nigerian Greek

But seriously, why are Nigerians everywhere? Besides rich black Americans, I swear that the majority of black people who aren't descended from slave populations are fucking Nigerians. Japan, Italy, China, Australia, etc.

They both seem kind of old. Aren't her sisters in their early 20s? Why not pick one of them instead?

who's the one on the right and is there any more of her?

Because most blacks in America are too poor/scared to travel internationally.
So you get a bunch of Nigerians everywhere scamming people.

I'll just watch the 90s animated Aladdin, and maybe the sequels if I have a weekend to myself.

>Aladdin
>not Chinese

Her sisters are white.

How do you not know who Kim Kardashian is?

Isn't Disney's Aladdin a bizarre mix of Golden Age era Baghdad, Mughal era India and some elements of Persian influence? They can't possibly thread that needle in a way that would please everyone.

I'd watch an Aladdin that's just a Ritchie movie for all-ages audiences. Modern day crime film in London with the basic plot points of the Disney move grafted onto it. At least it would be something new.

>rami malek singing
That sounds like a bad idea