Character is a 27 year old virgin who sits at home all day browsing imageboards

>character is a 27 year old virgin who sits at home all day browsing imageboards

you mean 37

Here's another sad story. I'm 27 years old. I've met my first love in January before it I didn't have any relationships at all because I'm a bit of a loner. Everything with her was hunky-dory. But the disaster was about to come...We broke up in April. She was disappointed by behavior of my mother who stashed away bank cards from her in my house. In fact she even doesn't know my mother in person. I shoudn't have told her this fact at all but I was too careless at the moment. And it's brought the disaster. I was persuading her to chill and to talk in person but she was determined not to do it. And I freaked out ! After 3 days of belligerent talking on the internet she decided to break up with me. I should have just used no contact rule but I didn't know about it ! I went off the deep end with my emotions ! I started to beg and plead like crazy, the whole week I was asking her to talk in person and she has just blocked me. But it didn't faze me because I went to her house like a fool. She didn't talk with me at all in person and threatened me. After a while I started to write from another account but once again I went off deep end when she started to insult me and refused to meet in person. To make a long story short I've been blocked 10 times on the internet - all my 10 accounts. I've been chaisng her one month and a half. 2 stupid visits to her house were futile and brought nothing but the rage frm her (she threatened to call the police the next time she sees me). Also I lied to her about money which I didn't have ( I wanted to show off because I was unemployed at the moment) but my friend betrayed me and told her the whole truth. And to make it worse - her son 15 years old is hating me too ! He used to respect me but now he considers me a sick individual.

>not that user, but...
>am actually that user

He told me to quit bothering his mother for good and that she will never love me again. I'm heart-broken as it can get ! My love one 35 years old and she was married two time whereas I was just 27 years old virgin and loner the whole life. She was my first woman. Damn, I was so happy with her ! We used to talk every day on the internet for hours ! It was love at first sight as she has told me. Right now she tells me I'm a wuss and not a man, poor, worthless and good-for-nothing. She insults me like crazy. She even told me how much I sucked in bed. She's completely lost it with her rage !

Do I still have chances ? I'm using no contact rule right now. 2 weeks have passed. I'm thinking about her every day. What a pain ! It's like a curse. I see her in my dreams almost every night. I hope we will reconcile our love one day - it's my biggest wish in life !

So you think you had a hard childhood? Well Fuck you, its got nothing on mine.

My mom practically kicked my ass out of the house before I even hit 13, and I never even met my dad. My only friend till I was 10 was the faggot prick next store who was always beating the shit out of me and telling me I wasn’t worth shit. Its not even like I had a choice, the town fucking had something like 9 people living in it, I shit you not. My entire adolescence was just moving around from place trying to get along with people who didn’t even want me.

You think that’s the worst? My only friend was an Asian guy in his thirties or something, who only kept me around because he thought I could help him get laid. The only perk was that I also got to hang around with this cute ginger chick, she was flat as a pancake sure, but damn she was a total nymph. She must have been a sadist or something cause she always took pleasure in hitting me and telling me how she loved to get wet.

But dear god the bane of my existence was this adult couple that I could NOT seem to avoid. You know these types of couples that are absolutely sickening, like they wear matching outfits and finish each other’s sentences? Yeah they were fucking creepers, and they had a cat, which was at least twice as annoying as they were, I swear this thing would never shut the fuck up.
Like I said I ended up moving from town to town getting into fights with other kids my age, even adults from time to time.

The only thing that kept me going was my dream to become a pokemon master.

Nigga, that's your biopic

this isn't Sup Forums

Jesus you have some fucking problems. Learn when to take a step back damn

/thread

Kek

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My sides

heh

>posts nearly a minute apart

you couldn't have made the samefag more blatant

>losing an argument
>start pretending to be the other guy and argue with myself
>commit a lot of fallacies on his behalf and start losing against myself
>the real him starts butting in saying that's not him
>it's too late
>use insecure Wi-Fi in my neighborhood to get a bunch of new IPs in the thread clowning on him
>actual other Anons start clowning on him too
>he gets overwhelmed and gives up
That was a several hour thread with at least a couple meal breaks throughout, never went in that hard but it was worth it.

It wasn't that funny

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I'm the king of false flagging and samefagging. It's the most effective means to make the other guy give up. I don't care if he's right or not.

Put me in the screencap

LMAO!!!

>character is a 47 year old virgin who sits at home all day browsing imageboards

lol

This is a good setup for an autism psa

You have zero chance, she hates you and thinks you're insane and obsessed. Try to forget about her, for everyone's good.

haha i got him beat by 3 years

oh wait

LOLOL UPVOTED

DOES ANYONE HAVE ANY ORANGE SLICES?

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>there's a movie made about your life

well i'm put down now
thanks bro

HOLY SHIT

>OP posts a green frog

No

ebin

include me in the screenshot. HAI /r/Sup Forums!!!!!

Now THIS is comedy!!!

Put me in the screencap pls

Did that really need to be labeled "peanuts"? I think it's blatantly obvious what they are.

I don't get it.

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It's there so blind people can know which bag is which

>Character is a 31 year old virgin and only has Internet friends

Holy shit my sides!

Well done ya cunt

Fucking gilded and upvoted man!!!

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To the front page!

leddit here we go

Posting on a EPIC thread!

the
> !
thing makes this fucking hilarious

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HOLY SHIT THATS THE JOKE THANKS MAN I DIDNT GET IT AT FIRST

Good one

etc.

i havent seen you do this in a while man how has life been

Wtf is going on? It wasn't that funny