Looks like Rock kino...

Looks like Rock kino...is back on the big guy 4u what did he mean by this oh nooo no noo noo pissing themselves with laughter menu boys

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editorial.rottentomatoes.com/article/jumanji-welcome-to-the-jungle-buzz-critics-say-its-a-funny-holiday-season-surprise/
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love it

my family wants to drag me to see this

wat do

>not unironically enjoying all rock kino

I officially give you permission to have dumb fun now and then

>nigger
>island nigger
>fat Jew
>ginger brit

Why are white men no longer allowed to star in big budget movies anymore?

#LITTY

I'm literally in love with Karen.

So two thirds of Justice League on its opening weekend?

>not loving the rock

Pretend you have cancer

ill go see it so i can jerk off to karen in the theater. I have a tradition of jerking off and cumming on the cinema floor during every one of her movies.

wow rude

Prepare you're piss bottles

Why does that bother you?

how? Its not my fault shes a literally flawless semen demon

shes not hot outside of nebula makeup

WRONG

got my portable piss reservoir cleaned today because boy oh boy I know me and my BROS are gonna need it! I pre-ordered the tickets in may and fuck me sideways I'm gonna bring my FRIENDS and LOVED ONES to the cinema to watch this LIGHT HEARTED, fun-filled jokes bonanza

>it's another "Sup Forums attempts to ruin ANOTHER thread" episode

Who /RAUNCHY/ here? Seeking some RELEASE from numbing ANGUISH me and the boys rolled up to DAS KINOPLEX last night after a harrowing forty mile TREK through the frozen WRAITH-ZONE making it just as the ravenous TYRANT MOTHS began their pre-mating MANHUNT. The distant FOG-HORNS gradually being overtaken by the deadly, silken FLUTTERING of their sable WINGS.

The EMBERS of the last audience were dying down in the CREMATORIA, needless to say we had a good LAUGH in the PENIS INSPECTION line when my bro Skyler got DRAGGED OFF by the guards to serve a fifty year sentence in the POPCORN MINES for wearing a non-regulation FALCONER'S GLOVE. The SHOWERS were pumping that good-ol' ZYKLON-B that gets you extra loose for the RAUNCHY fun; trying to hold your BREATH is good practice for trying not to PISS yourself later.

My man ROBERT served us up some tasty and very litty CRAB LEGS with extra 'BUTTER', well worth the SEVEN HUNDRED and EIGHTY TWO dollars FIFTY for the TIP.

Once we were INSIDE the film hadn't even STARTED before the first drips of PISS came out. An y'all just KNOW that nothing sets off the bloodlust of a TERROR-GHEIST like warm, 'buttery' PISS. Half the SQUAD was DRAGGED into the OUTER-DARKNESS before our BLADDERS were half-empty but even the keening shrieks of the ORPHANED ONES couldn't drown out this raucous COM-BOMB.

When the GUARDS came to finish off the SURVIVORS I was able to ESCAPE by using the CORPSE of my bro JONNY D as a CANOE when the lake of PISS was drained down the sluice normally used for flushing blood and FLESH. I only had to wait THREE HOURS in the rank soup of run-off MEDICAL WASTE and avoid the TELEPATHIC SHARKS that make the sewers their HOME. It wasn’t so bad except for being driven MAD by the hungry WHISPERS of all the GHOSTS.

10/10 SUMMER FUN, would SEE again!

it's another spiritual wickedness in high places movie

"oh look, being a tranny and being inside the other person's gender is totally fun and kewl!! just try it out yourself kids :)
cross dressing is fun XDDD
drag queeen YASS""

She looks so dumb but so cute.

Why do you hate fun?

REAL fans know what's up, not these OUT OF TOUCH jabroni critics

Just by that litty poster alone you can expect these few thing:
- a good time if you aren't too serious about things and know how to have a good time
- a lot of RAUNCHY HUMOUR... guys and gals DON'T bring your in laws they will not get it. this is the type of movie to have a GOOD TIME and let's face it sometimes that means things get a little RAUNCHY.
- nerdy library type people ARE NOT going to ENJOY this much of a SPLASHY Summer ROMP. It's not for them! Ignore all the critics or as my boys and I call them HATERS. They don't know how to HAVE A GOOD TIME THIS FILM ISN'T FOR **THEM** IT'S FOR US. LAID BACK NO STRESS GOOD TIMES GOOD VIBES FUN PEOPLE SO DON'T LET THE HATERS SCARE YOU AWAY. THEY ARE PAID TO HATE NOT HAVE A GOOD TIME YOU KNOW WHO YOUARE OUT THERE SO GET DOWN TO THE CINEPLEX AND LETS GET IT ON.

My two cents on what to bring:
- okay, guys, listen up. you're going to get wet. just ACCEPT it right now because it's going to happen so don't stress. my bro Forest went to Costco before the show and picked up a bulk pack of socks... YOU. ARE. GOING. TO. NEED. EXTRA. SOCKS. I can't overstate this point. Guys, you're going to the SMASH COMEDY ROMP of the Summer, possibly the decade. You're going to get piss on your feet.
- Always recommend a sleeve of AMERICAN BEER for summer hit raunchy flicks. ENJOY YOURSELF RIGHT!
- COOL PEOPLE. MY PEOPLE ARE GOING TO HAVE A GOOD TIME AT THIS FILM. ROLL DEEP ROLL EARLY ROLL OFTEN. PEOPLE GET OUT AND GET TO THE SHOW THIS IS YOUR TIME TO HAVE A GOOD TIME.
- Sunblock! Just kidding dudes, you are going to probably think you need it with all the HOT PEOPLE IN THE SUN on screen, but trust me guys, you can't get sunburned from a movie screen even if it feels like A BEACH PARTY.

who can guess what type of role kevin hart is going to play and what cliche jokes he will be apart of

>big guy in the rock
>fat nerdy white guy
>unrealistically sexy white girl
>short black comedic releif
this shit is a caricature of everything that is wrong with holywood

The theater I work at was told to cancel all advance showings by Sony due to low ticket sales. Sony has no confidence in this. Opening it against Star Wars is a dead giveaway.

Mana is the hawaiian word for FORCE SPIRIT my man, when you watch ROCK KINO you know you're overdosing on MANA man. The only spiritual thing that's going on in this movie is SPIRITUAL AWAKENING, for only those who laugh with the best unlock their full potential. I for one am ready to TRULY KNOW MYSELF and UNLOCK the 5th prana mana powers that lie within me.

>>unrealistically sexy white girl

>reality is unrealistic guys

Sir we provide piss buckets for Rock movies by default.

Murder them in their sleep.

hope you can buy pre-filled piss buckets, I can't piss in public and I wouldn't want to look bad in front of my friends

Bring your own candy

Looks like a fun and raunchy little jungle romp. Let me guess: assblasted critics are already pretending to hate it.

...

>unrealistically sexy white girl
Why do you hate yourself man? That's not unrealistic, believe in yourself. You can get a girl like that if you put your mind to it, and if you're a girl yourself you can get fitter and more beautiful than her with some hard work. Fuck do not give up on life, do not hate, always be a peace bringer, remember that good times bring good times, enjoy life, go to the cinema and enjoy this litty soon to be classic JUNGLE ROMP

0/10 made no effort it’s not a summer movie set at the beach it’s a holiday movie set in the jungle, you have to adapt the pasta for the situation

The point is the ugly nerd girl becomes the sexy white girl while the popular hot chick becomes Jack Black.
It doesn't mean any of what you said.

your family are nigger lovers? at this point I'm assuming your sister's boyfriend is black, is that right?

Just cut contact with them. It's better this way

>unironically disliking The Rock
go suck a tailpipe numbnuts

...

The Rock is /ourguy/
you have to go back to r*dd*t

It's such a nice way to describe Gillan.

THIS LITTY PANTS PISSING ROMP SHOULD DO MODERATELY WELL, BUT DONT EXPECT A SEQUEL

BASICALLY JOURNEY TO THE CENTER OF THE EARTH 2

Why is this allowed?

What exactly am I supposed to be mad about, autismo friend? That a woman has less muscle mass than a man, that’s she’s white and he isn’t, something else entirely...?

>tracking

Fake news based on shit statistics someone pulled out of their ass.

so just how raunchy is it going to be?

just a lil' jungle raunch romp that would make you PISS UNCONTROLLABLY, nothing special

turn that into a Sup Forums happening

say that you've forgot to take your falcon to the mandatory check up
they'll understand

i need karen gillan tummy pics

>ywn have nebula hate fuck you for days while angrily berating you the entire time

>I'm assuming your sister's boyfriend is black, is that right?
fiance actually

ITS GETTING LITTY #senpaitachi

editorial.rottentomatoes.com/article/jumanji-welcome-to-the-jungle-buzz-critics-say-its-a-funny-holiday-season-surprise/

>PiiPOO
lmao XD

I think this movie will be unironically good

Short sleeves?

Jewmanji

fucking EPIC

white "men" everybody

Why do you want to see muscular women? Are you some sort of soyboy?

>Christmas
woah, I thought this was a January movie.

>it's another white female surrounded by an all non-white male cast episode
Wh*te """""men""""" are irredeemably pathetic at this point HAHAHAHAHA

I'm just waiting for the web rip and eventual Karen webms

Yaaaas #OscarsSoWhite

>niggers and Jew foursome with white woman
Of course it’s going to kill at the (((box office))).

Kevin Hart is hot sweaty garbage

Him being a nigger is irrelevant. He's absolutely awful

Sure but you should probably support this litty flick and go see it with your pops on Christmas

Jack Black

the trailer looks pretty decent famalama. Looks like a fun #LITY family action comedy.
whilst i agree that making it jumanji 2 seems a tad forced (could have been any video game) that doesn't detract from a great cast and a funny premise for a movie.

>stuck up girl learns not to rely on her looks when she's stuck as Jack Black
>jew nerd learns to be more assertive as the Rock
>tall guy learns that being Kevin Hart and helping others isn't bad
>mousey girl learns to be attractive or something
looks like LEARN A LESSON KINO is back on the menu MMMMMMMBOYS

I'm tired of seeing Karen "no-sex-appeal" Gillan

He isnt a male, he barely qualifies as a numale

>only one white male
>named black
seriously?

formerly cluck's

Actually looking forward to this

kill your familty

JumanREEEEEEEEEEEE!

Go see it, spend time with your family.
Ain't like youre paying for the ticket.

Well the jokes on you, user, crossdressing girls are my fetish.