Western movie

>western movie
>cactus rolls across the scene

>cactus

>scifi movie
>"it's just like an animal!"
>alien solves a rubicks cube

>cowboy walks into a saloon
>give me your a shot of the strongest thing you got

>American movie
>hamburger rolls across the scene

usually they are on motorized scooters

My things are too strong for you, cowboy.

It's a tumbleweed, dumb frogposter

>another patron notices cowboy
>shit Jim don't you know who that is

>western movie
>guy enters through revolving door and everyone in the bar stops what they're doing to look at him

>"you're not from around here are you?"

>""Western"" movie
>takes place anywhere East of the Rockies

are you retarded or just stupid

red dit

>porn movie
>cocks slides into some random hole including OP's mum

>dat desperate, pathetic attempt at damage control

Aw his feelings are hurt =(

Kansas is not the West. Illinois is not the West.

We don't watch it to see some mud farmer fight about slavery and alligators

Stagecoaches and Indians, not Corn and Buffalo thank you

>alien solves a rubicks cube
>so it's intelligent
>still eats people
>so it's an animal
Bothers me sometimes. Why can't alien not be an intelligent predator like us? Why can't it be an intelligent God?

there are some sci-fi villains who are intelligent and hunt humans like humans might if they were aliens, but that's almost the same as a human vs a human so it's not very alien

you should look up where the rockies are and see just how much you're excluding

>Tornado movie
>Pa Kent rolls across the scene

I know exactly how much I am excluding you flyover cunt

Western=Desert and Plateau

Is Texas and New Mexico western?

Texas only has two acceptable Western locations: Hill Country in the time of Mexican control, or the Rio Grande

Eastern New Mexico can only work as a true Western if the characters are just passing through. It is far too rainy.

Here is my quick guide to the acceptable historical genre that can be set in certain regions so that you all dont make any mistakes again

>Eastern movie
>Screen rolls accross cactus

Yes

>revolving door

then Cheech locks him in and shoots him through the glass

*shoots cowboy in the chest*

>cactus rolls across scene
>cactus
>rolls
fucking kek
how high are you right now user?

The Western is distinguished by the story being about the conflict between the personified elements of the human soul. A character who represents Death or Fear vs the character who represents Survival or Hope. The characters are purposefully one dimensional, at least as far as can be easily understood: the Greedy, the Liar, the Revenge.

Any story about the struggle of a character vs the land or against the unknown is Pioneer/Settler, which is why Western's pretty much never scenes where the character tries to stay dry in a rainstorm: geography is merely a backdrop for the Western

You were saying?

>*rolls across your screen*
>*blocks your path*
>*pokes you*
what do?

>western movie
>protagonist kicks in flippy saloon doors
>I reckons it's you what done killed my Pa.

Captcha: store fronts. Even the fucking beep-boop AI knows what's up.

>Wild west movie
>calls donkey an ass
I guess it was a different time

it was in the 1800s retard

>movie with a sex scene
>I'm not in it

Just admit you fucked up. That would at least be respectable.

>it aint me starts playing

>"Don't you know whose dog you just killed?!"
>"A fucking punk ass bitch?"
>"NO! He's literally the most famous person in the world! Literally everyone except you and your gang mates know who he is! Every random person on the street knows who John Wick is!"

>italian movie
>meatball rolls across the scene

>French black & white silent movie
>baguette rolls across the scene

Technically yes. Texas isn’t considered “The South” anymore. Texas, Arizona, and New Mexico are considered south west.

>western
>everyone has southern accent

>japanese movie
>gong makes the gang sound.

>arab movie
>heads roll across the screen

>London movie
>Irish movie
>Asian movie
>Saudi Arabian movie

>porn everywhere in vicinity of a grade school
>kids of a grade school read nude magazines
>teacher, priest, king gets caught diddling a young boy
ree

>japanese movie
>tentacle rolls across the screen

ITT: Things that never happened.

Name 500 times these things didn't. I'll wait.

>user movie
>joke rolls past his head

what's detective?

>canadian movie
>leaf syrup rolls accross the scene

YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooo

>Sup Forums movie
>brapping ass rolls by

>watch dutch movie
>boobs roll across the screen

>interracial couple rolls by

>oh no no no no rolls by

Total Recall by Paul Verhoeven even had three boobs rolling across the screen.

>marvel movie
>orange slices roll by

>16 year old posting black twitter meme rolls by

>man walks into a bar
>"Can I have a bear?"

>underage girl rolls by

>Sup Forums movie
>mommy issues roll by

>Sup Forums movie
>disney cunnie rolls across the screen

Dumbass

retards

I HEARD IT! SHlT!

That wouldn't roll you fucking inbred

>cactus
Dumb frogposter.

>
>

Test

whats a quick way to get a short boardwide ban, any board will do just want to test out my new ban evasion method

make your own thread you stupid fucking idiot

>idiot
stopped reading there

>Bartender, im going into a showdown and I need your strongest drink

>detective hasn't drink an inch of acohol in six years
>takes a sip
>next day he's plastered
>you are out of the case!

You're a treasure my user.

hi newfag

>Someone had a rough day
>I need a drink

No friend. I'm just having a really good day. I won't let you get me down. :)

>french movie
>group of poor, colored people ranting about rich people and racists

>French black & white silent movie
>nazi tanks roll across the street

>no one teaches her how to ollie

>irish movie
>the borgais rolls royce across the street.

whatever you say, newfag

I hope you have a good day user. You look real handsome today.

>cactus

Stop being wholesome, and I'm not a treasure.

>vietnam war movie
>it ain't me starts playing

That is a picture of a Compass Barrel Cactus. They always grow pointing South! It's a cool cactus fact! Tell all your friends!

Many places in the southwest were founded by pioneers that were confederate soldiers.

>kinoplex documentary
>crab leg rolls across the scene