So Sup Forums hows your sex life?

So Sup Forums hows your sex life?

Pretty good, I have sex with my gf regularly

Nonexistent.

I'm a 25 year old kissless virgin. How do I convince a girl to give me pity sex?

With sand.

saw this movie last night. it's okay -- nothing amazing, but not awful. my only real observation is that Dave Franco is not handsome enough to play that Greg guy.

Haven't fucked since 2013.
I don’t know if I will ever again or if I even could.

Show them your Movie/Anime collection. They love that shit!

I'm 27 and have never put the benis in the bagina.

...

how do go for as to gay sex do penis swivel with the lube buttcheeks? thanks

My gf just had my kid so only anal and blowjobs...

You find a girl who is just as desperate as you. She probably won't be attractive.

It had been nearly a decade since I had any pussy, but that's actually changing since I've dropped the weight.

Son was born almost a year ago, wife got hormonal implant for BC and it KILLED her sex drive stone dead.

first few months hurt but I think i'm getting used to it

I broke a 9 year dry streak last summer. At least I didn't make it a decade.

Pity sex doesn't exist, its a pathetic male fantasy that stops beta males like you from killing themselves. Pity is probably the least sexual emotion on the planet, no girl is going to want to bang you because no one else will. Just do what says

>wife got hormonal implant for black cock
Sorry to hear man

I think I may have gotten my gf pregnant...fuck this gay earth Sup Forums I’m too young to have a kid

Leave.

>doing sodomy with your wife

absolutely disgusting

i found it insulting to tommy more than anything
franco plays him as a retard
dave is a short failure with a nothing face
the plot takes so long to get to the shoot, and those scenes are all but shelved in favour of the troubled relationship fast forward version
i was looking forward to it, i was pleasantly surprised by the reviews, and i was let down terribly
completely unnecessary film, and a jack off exercise for francos ego

I don't have one, but that's almost a good thing because I'm terrified of STDs. I can juat fap anyway.

Been 4 months since I last had sex. Chick I dated abroad is coming for a visit in a few month so I guess that's nice.

I used to know a girl, she had a dozen guys. One of them found out about it... beat her up so bad she ended up at a hospital on Guerrero Street

hahaha what a story mark

GET OFF MY BOARD CHAD

once a year with a hooker

she probably doens't exist at all

DUDE MARKET SHILLING ON TV LMAO

just rubbed one out to a new piss jav i hadn't seen, so according to my brain, it's almost like i'm impregnating a new woman for the first time. shit was pretty cash.

>Son was born almost a year ago, wife got hormonal implant for BC and it KILLED her sex drive stone dead.
>first few months hurt but I think i'm getting used to it
divorce if you're brave enough
live for the rest of your life in sexual frustation if you're a coward

Why once a year?

kid's in the hospital...it's very stressful...

That's not funny you sick fuck.

Haha what a story

fucking deletet this

>Grandma asks "are there any girls in your classes at school?" out of the blue
>AKA why doesn't a handsome young man like you have a gf?
>Can't just call them roasties
>Uh, uh, there are a few
>Grandma probably thinks I'm gay now

Haven't told anybody in my family that I actually did go on one date, but the girl who asked me out turned out to be a stripper so I cut contact with her.

25 year old kissless virgin. Not too good.

How do I convince my girlfriend I need to have anal sex? She has IBS and doesn't want to try it.

money

"They're not my type", user. It's not a hard question

tell her it'll fix it

Honestly man, it's a terrible idea. I have IBS and shit three to four times a day. Staying clean is one thing, but the bleeding is a whole other matter. She probably doesn't tell you this, but I bet her tissue paper comes up with blood at least half of the time. Bleeds and tears are a major reason why so many gays get STDs.

She wants you mate

>but the bleeding is a whole other matter
Why would IBS make you bleed? I thought you just shit a lot? We both are clean so there is nothing to worry about with that.

>Why would IBS make you bleed?
Because when you're wiping your ass four times a day, every day, it gets mighty raw.

holy shit dude nice. me too. extra lonely since i threw out my dildo at the beginning of the year. sad!

Well, I kinda feel like a dick asking her so much now.

>16
Alright no biggie ill lose my virginity next year
>17
Ok shit happens maybe next year
>18
whatever its going to happen eventually right
>19
>20
>21
JUST

ask her out through dance

29 years old in a month. Have never had a girlfriend or kissed a girl. Much less had sex.

Somehow I haven't wanted to kill myself yet.

Everytime I get wanting to have sex, I fap, and then I feel fine for the rest of the day.

#MakeHerDay

>30 years old
>kisslesss
>handholdless
>direct eye contactless
>haven't had friends since 2004
hi Sup Forums

I'm a 20 year old kissless virgin.
I went on a date once when I was 16, but we didn't connect. Then when I was 18, a 22 year old autistic girl really quickly showed me her pussy on Skype. During my last year of high school I became good friends with a girl, but I couldn't get any because I was fat, autistic, and she had a bf.

Is there any hope for me?
I've lost a lot of weight and I act less autistic now.

Not with that attitude weirdo

>Lost mine at 15
What the fuck are you guys doing to take this long?

I'm 31. Got a chubby girl with great tits that I fuck once a week or every two weeks, but I won't take her out on real dates or with friends and family unless she loses the weight. She'd be a solid 8 or 9 if she trimmed down the gut. Her tits are ginormous and she's got a nice ass and a pretty face.

Still on the lookout for a slightly younger, even more attractive chick though. Plus she's 33, and I want a girlfriend no older than 29.

20 ain't shit man, if you truly have lost weight and are better at hiding your power level then you'll be fine as long as you're not the ugliest motherfucker on the block

That's pretty much how you'll feel when dating as well.

pick up smoking

>haven't had friends since 2004
you have us user

Not so good Tommy, I had a friends with benefit I fuck regularly but I fell in love with her and confessed my love to her and she left me.....

I knew this kid who got pity sex because he was graduating a virgin. Our friend felt sorry for him so she fucked him. She didnt fuck me though

What a fucking loser