Just got back from Nu Diversity Wars. What an absolute piece of shit

Just got back from Nu Diversity Wars. What an absolute piece of shit.
I'm struggling to think of anything I enjoyed in 2 and a half hours. George should have never sold it to Disney. I didn't think it could get worse after Foce Awakens. How wrong I was.

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I am so fucking confused by what I just watched.

You just watched the thing you loved as a child slip into a coma and get hooked up to life support. It's breathing, but it's not alive.
The plug should be pulled. It would be the merciful thing to do.

I had some hope that the trilogy could have ended up half decent as a whole, but what the actual fuck did I just waste two and a half hours on? I can’t believe people actually clapped at the end of that piece of shit.

thank you goyim for watching my propag...I mean my awesome movie.

Yesssssss... more shekels for Moloch.

Where did you see it? I mean the release date on the poster you used in your OP isn't even for two days yet.

I can't believe the teviews. I just checked and its averaging 85 on metacritic. What the fuck did these people watch? Their bank accounts get a boost courtesy of Disney?

>George should have never sold it to Disney
selling it was the best move on his part. people kept shitting on him but now they will learn true horror

Melbourne, Australia. It's 3:50 am Thursday here.

First screenings finished about an hour ago in Australia. I just got home.

Got back home and looked that up as well, how does this have an 8.5 while Rogue One is a 7.8?

Major plot points and the juicy details please?

Reminder that Blade Runner 2049 is only 81.

Is this starting to feel like one of those girl movies? Like Hunger Games, Divergent etc?

I didn't even watch Rogue One because I was a bit disillusioned with Star Wats after Force Awakens. Thought I'd give it a second chance and my god what a waste of time and money.

The main plot leaks by Pawn are all true, even the superman Leia, though it is a bit exaggerated. She holds her arm outwards when she flies back to the bridge, in a 45 degree upright angle.

As my mate put it, ‘what the fuck was up with the “Ban the Melbourne Cup” scene’

How does Luke die? I read he disappears while staring at the sunset or something, but why?

So Leia just becomes a super Jedi out of thin air just because?

I don't even fucking know. It feels like I just took a really fucking bad acid trip. I'm going to wake up in a few hours and go see a safe, boring and ultimately relatively competently made Star Wars.
Used up all his force juice to prank edgelord.

Yes. He dies looking at a sunset/sunrise, briefly imagining the sun as twin suns. That was actually a nice moment.

He dies because of the effort of doing a kind of Force projection of himself across the galaxy to confront Kylo.

Smoke dies in an extremely anticlimactic manner at the hands of Kylo.
Like does a long distance force hologram then does because reasons.
Yoda as a force ghost destroys all the remnants, texts and history of the Jedi with a bolt of lightning and suggests they don't need it because Rey is too good for the history.
The tone is awfully inconsistent and the quips are like 1 every 2 minutes which breaks up and dramatic tension built up.
It's utter shit. Don't let the reviews tell you otherwise.

The entire lot of Casino scenes should have been cut in my opinion.

After force projecting himself to stall Kylo he appears to be fatigued. The cut back to Achto is him on a ledge where he trained Rey in the sitting position, and a Binary Sunset is slowly being covered by clouds, he smiles and then fades away with the Sunset backdrop, then his robes blow away.

Yep pretty much, she's floating in space for a bit and he body is freezing (going pale and ice forming), then she wakes up and pulls herself back into the airlock door of the bridge. She does however pass out immediately after.

I thought Rey stole the books before she left. I think you can see them briefly on the Falcon in end scene.

>suggests they don't need it because Rey is too good for the history.
I think the idea is more that the Jedi are so up their ass about their jedi-ness that it's just going to keep destroying them.
Which is something that's come up in other Star Wars media before.

Didn't notice that.

>every single male is either traitor or full of fatal mistakes
>and females are all heroic and saviors

They are not even trying to hide their hate against men anymore. I was kinda surprised when I saw tumblr haired female captain that looked like a villain at first but nope. She was right and she dies a hero

>too good for the history
What the fuck does that even mean

It’s like that entire side story was written for the purpose of killing Phasma, it amounted to nothing else.

Yoda says
"There is nothing in those books that Rey does not already possess".
It was some metaphor for the ethics and moral codes of the Jedi already being inside Rey since she's inherently good natured.

For over a thousand generations they were the guardians of peace and justice but might as well forget about that, burn it down and start again because one Sith managed to infiltrate the government and wipe out most of them. K

I liked it a lot :)

>Too busy worshiping their own religiousness to do their fucking jobs
>This is fine

How exactly were they too busy worshiping their own religiousness? And even so how does that cancel out their contribution to more than 10,000 years of peace and prosperity?
As far as I'm concerned that whole scene is advocating destroying and re-writing history.

They forced Rose down our throats.

Literally FInn becomes a side character to her

>Wah wah wah misandry!

Of the movie's many, many problems that is lower on the scale.

>Yoda as a force ghost destroys all the remnants, texts and history of the Jedi with a bolt of lightning and suggests they don't need it because Rey is too good for the history.

If they got it right, its because Yoda has long since realized that the jedi codes and morals were flawed. The entire prequels are about this yknow.

I don't see this as a bad turn of events, to be on the light side of the force is to choose to do good its that simple. The rest of it was a perversion of the point.

You know, Death is too good for Dyke Kennedy and the House of Rats and decay. A hell, A hell that has lots of meat hooks, boiling pots, and acrid thick smoke, that's what they deserve.

It's something that the KOTOR games went over a lot too. It's a reoccurring theme of the franchise at this point.

Hunger Games was unironically far better than this new trilogy

Can confirm this happened.

His mitochlorian count dropped to zero

He gets tired and decides to pull a Ben and die by vanishing.

are we talking Marvel-tier quips, or just your average, run-of-the-mill quips.

>Nigs become pets to the Asians

It's like real life

Bastards

I think that was the meta message of the movie
"Get rid of the past". I felt like that was exactly what happened this movie. Don't answer any of the questions, don't pull any of the magic from the past episodes into the movie, just make a hollywood blockbuster cashcow. Fuck, man, I think I understand how OT babbies feel now. Grew up on the prequels, and this legitimately hurt to watch.

Marvel tier

in the books he had other masters to help him and they did it with ease. as has been said all along the "new" star wars is just Frankenstein of EU

Marvel tier. They're not fucking funny and they all happen at the most I opportune moment. Barely anyone in the theatre laughed either, it's the sort of shit hacks add a laugh track to in shitty sitcoms to tell their audience they're supposed to laugh.

so its just like when korra killed the spirits of the other avatars? If people were inherently anything they would not need contemplation, also was not "new" wars about how there is no black and white? They could have said the teachings would confuse her/muddy the path she must walk but then they could have done the same with Luke

Dude just destroy every record of history you dont agree with lmao

>movies gotta do well in the Chinese market ideas?
make the black guy subservient to an oriental broad that'll sell

>make the black guy subservient to an oriental broad that'll sell
Oh, herro brack gui! I can't tark wight, but I rove you!

Because she's Anakin child, duh. She can use force to some extent.

Why even watch it?

>the movies BAAAD
>can't even pay attention

They'll hate her even talking to a black guy

>whole scene is advocating destroying and re-writing history
it is.
>10,000 years of peace and prosperity
clearly that was a lie and there were discontent people around
you have learned nothing
youtube.com/watch?v=hzLEBtObYxU

How was the OST, aussie friend?
How would you rank it?

Because it's actually good and OP and others are just being contrarian

Serves you right for shitting on George

I just didn't feel it. I thought TFA was great, I saw it 4 times in the cinema, I don't know maybe I was riding on nostalgia but I did not give a shit about this movie. I was waiting for it to end.

whats a good way to spoil the movie for people?? Like we had HAN SOLO DIES for the episode 7

Fuck off.

nothing new, the only really powerful moments was leia plus the love theme with han, thats pretty much it. Other than that it was "classic" star wars with nothing particularly interesting.

Snoke and Luke die. Reylo is real.

Luke is a ghost.

Amazing argument.

It was so fucking boring at parts. I can't believe the space battle they open the movie with lasted for 80% of the runtime, and pretty much everything involving Finn was mindnumbing.

>Reylo is real.
Is it though? I feel like they doubled down on Kylo being evil and ditched the "conflicted" part of his character by the end of the film. He's the final boss now.

this.

This is actually what we get for all the prequel bashing. Say what you will about those movies, but they set up the OT really well. This new franchise is basically its own deal, not really giving a fuck about the rest of the saga

>Snoke is noone (not even plageuis, which would legit be an easier and better explanation than "haha yeah he's literally just dead idk"
>Rey's parents are noone (I guess its not technically confirmed but seemed pretty legit)
>the guy who swindled them LITERALLY WASNT EVEN NAMED. couldve been boba fett, lando calrissian, literally fucking anyone. It wouldve been so god damn easy to make this feel more connected to the saga.

Nah man

>but they set up the OT really well.
Eh, Anakin was too much of a sniveling bitch.

has anyone looked at the reaction on reddit yet? are they freaking out or shilling?

so its an allegory for the eu? and luke for the ot fans? is this movie just shitting on star wars nerds? whats the point?

I feel you bro. It was awful. Fucking tone deaf retarded plot that felt like a conglomeration of bizarre fan fiction.

It also felt like two different films fucking squished together into one incoherent mess.

And by god did they butcher Luke.

Im legit starting to feel this. George was not good with the movies but he put a lot of his money into the clone wars cartoon and they gave us the pathos we wanted (for the most part) Disney gave us nothing

>they set up the OT really well.
The lies you guys are willing to tell yourself now that something else has come along to be demonized...

>killing Luke

welp Disney just took the biggest shit on the franchise they possibly could have

oh and Leia doesn't die? good luck with that in the sequel JJ.

ok fair point. but besides i think that was mostly execution. writing for the character was bad, but the arc made sense.

The whole movie had a theme of letting go of the past, shoved down your throat by most of the major characters. So in a sense it might be a allegory for Legends being left behind.

The Jew nose on that rebel officer was fucking distracting. What a beak.

you don't go around burning ancient texts because you don't agree with them unless you are nazis or isis or some shit.

>"haha yeah he's literally just dead idk"
If plageuis had not been killed sheev would never take power. If plageuis had been alive in would trun sheev into sauron plotting against morgoth, it would really change how I saw sheev and not in a good way

George's movies had competent ideas but were incompetently directed. For Disney, it's the opposite.

Yeah the whole Luke arc just had a terrible feel to it, with no pay off at all. It didn't feel like it had continuity with ROTJ Luke, it felt like fanfiction.

And yeah, Leia should've died. The next film is fucked in that regard.

Can't believe i'd see the day where a star wars film would make the Phantom Menace look decent.

Reddit tends to just go along with what they're told is great. I'm sure they're loving it and a few ardent fans are getting shit on for bringing up valid criticism.

I never prequel bashed, honestly. They have pretty glaring issues but they're clearly still made with love and creativity, and despite all the hate for them they blew the star wars universe wide open. Every new movie has been so goddamn safe, which goes against the very spirit of star wars imo.

I think the most interesting aspect of the movie so far is people talking about how Kylo and Rey "play off each other" and try to recruit each other to the dark/light side.
Then apparently they disagree and leaves, with Kylo seemingly looking nice...then goes off and becomes "evil" again by taking the F-O's high command seat.

Can anyone who saw the movie explain the dynamic to me?

It mostly fit. It was rushed but with supplementary books it reached acceptable level

i wasnt asking a shill trying to make the movie sound like its anything other than propaganda. any actual regulars care to weigh in?

...

Just came back from a screening (Italy). I didn't hate it... but I did not like it either. It's just so... average.

>pros
I really liked how they ended Luke's story arc
I liked the coreography of the battles
I liked the sound design and most of the visual effects
>cons
the quips are fucking insufferable
the whole casino shit was forgettable (and preachy at points)
all the main characters manage to stay fucking uninteresting (besides MAYBE kylo ren, the secret protagonist of this whole thing)
general red-head hitler is reduced to a walking talking joke from the very first scenes
phasma remains useless
snoke dies in an hilariously anticlimactic (and, to be frank, kind of unbelievable) way
general Tumblrina Pinkhair is handled in a piss-poor way. at first she's basically represented as incompetent af, then she had a masterplan all along... but why the fuck didn't she tell poe??? "yo, my dude, we're just slowly making our way to a base, chill". I didn't get it. Also, since she already made her peace, why didn't she kamikaze immediately after they start blowing the pods up?

tl;dr the movie is visually entertaining and mostly respects the lore of the franchise, but the plot, the characters and the execution is pretty bad
I thought it was a "remix" of all things star wars, and it's not as good as it may sound

very bad writing

So if you can ram shit in hyperspeed for massive damage( One moncal cruiser hitting snoke's pizza slice basically blows up the whole first order fleet.) what is the point of flying through narrow passages to destroy the Death Stars?

this. rebels also gives off more a vibe of terrorism than freedom fighting

oh, I forgot that I found the ending sequence unnecessary and needlessly cheesy. if this was the end of a trilogy, it could've worked, but as it is just the 2nd movie, it feels off