Why isn't beast the gay one?

Why isn't beast the gay one?

he doesn't even have a significant other ever

Just like Iceman and Angel.

He was like ten years ago.

That was retconned to just be him fucking with a woman he hated.

brand

BrandxMcCoy is my otp you fucking pleb.

Plus a broad, hairy gay dude is a bit on the nose.

>That was retconned
It wasn't retconned. He was lying to get a rise out of people. This was said several times by several people in that run you idiot.

unfair

because every person who wrote Iceman has retconned it so that every time they wrote him being an ass or a dick is was him hiding his gay away. Seriously, the Astonishing X-Men arc where he goes batshit crazy is now about him lashing out from being in the closet according to the writer.

YOU'RE the gay one

Because Grant Morrison tried it, and played it off as a joke when it was rejected by the readers.

Because they still cared more about the opinions of readers back in that pre-Social Media era.

Because nobody wants a gay furry

Uh user.....

it was always a joke. Beast was butthurt because his gf broke up with him because he'd become too furry for her to find attractive, so he tried to emotionally wound her back by implying she was so bad at sex its made him reconsider if he's even attracted to woman at all
her counterplay was to go and tell everyone beast told her he was gay, and his countermove was to embrace it and prop himself up as a flamboyant gay icon
the whole thing was two adults acting like catty teenagers from the onset
Grant made animal man an annoying preacy vegetarian, and had gorilla and a brain in a jar confess their undying life to each other right before being blown up
grant's attitude has always been 'i'm gonna do what I'm gonna do and whoever they replace me with can clean up the mess when I'm done'

I ship Hank/Simon

I'm not convinced that ANY X-Men mutant is strictly heteronormal.

Even Hank's mutant/alien crossbreed girlfriend is a freakin' furry with "compatible alien anatomy".

what kind of a man could possibly love a beast?

But how much of it was really just a joke?
Hank's always been smart enough to know the lines can get blurry.

>not knowing about Beast's womanizing ways

actually considering it was 70s NYC when he was peak dude is riddled with STDs/

Hey maybe that explains why he's been such a shit! Syphilis infected his brain

a Wonder

>he doesn't even have a significant other ever

she hasn't slept with Carol YET

Thank you for that.

Shut your posting-hole! Carol would NEVER cheat on Jess, for gosh sake, they have a child together!

I am Sorry user.

Also, why isn't Scott the gay one?
They were assassinating his character anyway with the whole Professor getting X'ed thing.

wait, it's not official?

Bendis is dumb and I'll never forgive him for making the star of Operation: Zero Intolerance gay

This reminds me:

What's going to happen to the whole "X-Men being a metaphor/allegory for diversity and sexual minorities" thing now that it's becoming more acceptable to introduce gay characters in books that aren't specifically about challenging bigotry?

plus gay people are not a big deal, its 2017, gay marriage is legal

I'm amazed they brought Northstar back just in time to shotgun him into a marriage once that advance in gay rights happened.
It's one in a dozen crazy coincidences that Marvel comics has benefited from over the years.
He was basically a shunned non-character for a whole decade after they outed him and he's brought back with perfect timing to exploit the whole thing a few years later.

Either they double down on gender theory or they aim at a global market.

The far right in Europe and migrants / refugee provide enough for the latter.

Doesn't the Inhumans franchise exploit the immigrant/refugee allegory now?

Tale as old as time.

Context?

Dust solo when?

Bendis needed him to be straight to do his Beast/Jean/Scott love triangle. Angel had the even more dumb romance with X-23. So that left Iceman as being the most useless and Bendis made him the gay one.

I've read more than enough scifi and fantasy to declare confidently that Marvel has yet to scratch the surface of how queer things can get

(A)- Created by Morrison, who I contend didn't understand the allegories of the source material

and
(B)- They later on exposed her deep dark secret desire to be shallow and superficial, alienating her from the restrictive social norms she seemingly abides by but entitling her to be recognized as a fellow typical mutant outcast by virtue of her shameful hidden abnormality of hypocrisy.
(that House-of-M crossover event 'academy story exposed that)

they're actually Marvel's best relationship?

You sure there, user?
Because if you read closely you can notice that just like Bobby a great many X-muties are hiding what they are:
Storm, Rachel and Kitty are way overdue to come out as lesbians.
Quicksilver and Wanda, Colossus and Magik are shipped as incestuous for a reason.
Xavier and Magneto had a gay affair in their youth.
A number of their villains are sicko psychosexual stalkers.
(not that Psylocke minds that much)
... and then there's all the trannies. I count nine now.

Oh yeah, and the furries like Hank are still there too...

They haven't really had a buddy-buddy relationship since Hank went full-tilt mad scientist.
Remember that issue during Secret Invasion where SkrullHank taunted Wondey about how Hank had changed too much to still be friends?
That was a thing.
(although I was kinda hoping that when Rogue absorbed him she would have turned into more of a Hank friend in a nod to how she used to have other personalities influence her so much)

I can't even tell you how many times X-Men word balloons have pregnant pauses, unspoken words, hesitations, potential double meanings, and their newest trick: interruptions, often with an assumption of what the character was just about to say...

Is there an essential reading list for Simon and Hank Bro-ventures?

Yeah i know WCA and Busiek's Avengers, but particular issue numbers?

Whenever I get an itch like that I do my basic net research, go over to Simon and Hank's Wikipedia pages and make a list using the footnotes.
FYI: their last night out painting the town red was in the pages of A+X

any excuse I have to post this, I take

>he doesn't even have a significant other ever
sure he does Simon

I say Hank's not gay.

I say he's a crossdresser.

cause he has a big dick. Those telepath women wouldn't let him get away they need the big one eye

Remember when Cyclops was Hank's best friend on the X-Men?

Huh. I just always figured their love went beyond the crude lusts of the flesh and was more a spiritual bond.

remember when Jean was killed by Terrorists and Hank tried to argue that only happened because Scott had a psychic affair with Emma?

I loved these two together, they were so happy

>a bit on the nose

They had Logan/Herc who are the most bear-ishly bearish bears around and that was actually enjoyable.

Cherik is cancerous.

Remember when Hank was so angry at Scott that he somehow decided it was a good idea to bring back past versions of themselves into their universe?

This is already 5 years old holy shit

I'm not so sure that he isn't still.

>I'm not convinced that ANY X-Men mutant is strictly heteronormal.

So, uh, you think Wolverine's ever played the skin flute? I mean... he IS over 100 years old.

Marvel needs to retcon this whole gay stupidity with issue #1 of iceman solo. of course we've seen the solicits, not gonna happen. Marvel could've had something with this ressurxion bullshit, but instead we got
>only females can lead
>Gaygaygay
>Whatever they're doing to rachel

Well to be fair, Scott doesn't have many legitimate "friends" on the team. Everyone respects him sure, but the only ones he's actually bonded with are Hank, Ororo, and Logan

Imagine all the bara porn.

without a doubt.

That wasn't entirely spiteful.
Hank was doing that as an alternative to murdering him, like everyone wanted to. Even Kitty!
The plan was that the O5 would kick his ass, lay on the mother of all guilt trips, and remind Scott of who he used to be and inspire him to reform.
That expectation was just as delusional as expecting the O5 to discover what horrors await in their future and volunteer to go back to live them out.
Of all of them, only Bobby was unscathed ... and that's because he had been stuck in perpetual immaturity for his entire history.
(and that just-so-happens to be symptomatic of unresolved personal issues)

is this what homos do? sit around and dream up context to justify their self insert?

tfw they're coming back

To be even more brutally "fair",
Scott and Ororo have been fighting over who's the boss ever since She took over the team, and it's turned into a nasty personal feud between them.
And Logan might respect him as a combat leader but he's put the moves on Scott's wife, criticized all Scott's many personal failings, and never failed to attack Scott outright when things got too hostile between them.

Hank actually is Scott's best friend. And his oldest friend now that Jean's dead and Bobby hates him.

Bobby is gay because he's a twink with powers that make for a good thematic contrast with any number of fire based guys; he's prime bait for fujoshits.
Beast is straight because he's a nerdy bara type when he's not a furry and thus doesn't invoke "squees" as hard.

It's too late Beast will forever be Frasier in my mind.

>pompous ass that no one wants to hang out with when he's with his family
>GOAT bro when he's with his friends
Like fucking pottery, it rhymes

First of all, it's called "gaydar", and it's more accurate than you'd think.
Second, 'shipping characters as a hobby involves looking for these connections.
Third: What? You can't even imagine that self-inserting's a hobby for the incestuous, tranny, or furry too?

>First of all, it's called "gaydar"
This kindof delusion is pretty intense.

One thing that pissed me off was how many shitposters put up threads saying that Johnny Storm and Ben Grimm would be the next characters to "be made gay".
It's like they never noticed how many Marvel characters had superpowers that reflect bad puns: Johnny's a hothead, Ben is as reliable (a rock), and Iceman's transparent and cold to women.

>the intention of making Bobby gay and not Beast was to pander to annoying teenage girls from tumblr instead of actual gays

Hm, why am I not surprised?

>people want Johnny to be gay so him and Daken can fuck

Disgusting.

So is thinking that your pop-psychology buzzword usage makes you qualified to pretend to diagnose anons over the internet.
Or did you think qualified professional psychologists spend their time on chan boards analyzing random posts for hints of madness?
Or that anyone not as delusional as you would believe such a thing is a sane thought to have in your head?
"Gaydar" is a word in the common use of the English language, you can even use it in Scrabble, it's a known concept ingrained in the popular culture of modern society.
Declaring otherwise in opposition to the obvious reality of the world, and expecting others to believe your posts over their own lived experiences...
Isn't that clear evidence of madness?

oh god you're the tard from the Bobby thread from earlier

I recognise the autistic ass way you format your posts oh man

because bendis is a homophobe and racist who sublimates those beliefs into virtue signalling

Hahahah...hahahahah ohwow.

Please stop shitposting every X-Thread with these constant posts about your deep-seated hangups.

Your containment board already created a containment thread for you to shitpost about your personal issues on Sup Forums, go use it and stop shitting all over actual Sup Forums threads with what comes out of your obsessive little shitposting mind.
And for fuck's sake, your "pray-away-the-gay" camp wouldn't want you obsessing over gays anyway.

Ahahahah...AAHAHAHAHAH. This guy is a gold mine of comedy.

>getting this mad over the fact that people hate your husbando's gayness and want him to go back to being straight so you can't self insert as his spic boyfriend anymore

Young Beast being gay would've made more sense, he'd catch that bara audience.

But fuzzy Beast is very specifically furry territory, so.

I'm telling you, one day their going to catch him wearing stars with little tassels on his nipples and a garter belt on his waist to hold up stockings.