We need a Zelda trilogy as epic as LotR

We need a Zelda trilogy as epic as LotR.
This is one of the good things that can come of Hollywood being as unoriginal as they are.

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Who would you cast?

...

dan schneider could help us cast this one

>Zelda
The manchild faggot epic trilogy xD

Gal Gadot in blackface

so remake legend?

>zelda
No thanks. I don't want a soy boy faggot character like Link.

I only can ever see it working with Ganondorf as the anti-hero/sympathetic villain

John Boyega as Link
Idris Elba as Gannon
Maisie Williams as Zelda

They would make Link a trans or something anyway

How to you make a movie trilogy out of a video game that has no stories or characters?

h-he's not a soyboy!

Uma Thurman

>entire culture of warrior women
>6-8 feet tall
>still believe in romance and want to find true love
>variation in outlook... some want to woo their ideal man, others would be fine kidnapping him and taking him back for "fun"

God, that Nintendo polish somehow goes right into their fetish fuel

young Mark would be the perfect Link.

NO!
ZELDA IS BETTER THAN A MOVIE.

YOU ARE CHEAPENING THE ZELDA BRAND BY MAKING IT INTO A SHIT PLEB MOVIE.

I BOUGHT A GAMING SYSTEM THAT I DIDN'T EVEN WANT AND $60 JUST TO PLAY BREATH OF WILD
I WON'T EVEN PAY $5 TO SEE A MOVIE.

>Kills entire armies himself
>sumo wrestles gorons
>is desired by half the women he runs across
>his soul is tempered across generations, constantly fighting evil

Beta faggot

Link is canon faggot.

>We need a Zelda trilogy as epic as LotR.

Dude, I love LoZ as much as the next nerd, but it's not even in the same league as Lord of the Rings.

>self inserting this hard

Nintendo made Link a literal faggot tranny in BotW and Mario a beta cuck orbiter in Odissey.

First film is an adaptation of Zelda 1.
>an unknown actor as Link
>some lesser known actress as Zelda
>Steve Blum as Ganon
>some bollywood actress as Nabooru
Second film is stopping the Return of Ganon.
As for the third one, I'm drawing a blank.

As someone who has read Fellowship I agree. Zelda has deep lore, though. So it would make a neat movie.

even better

Ah yeah, I remember the questline where you go in to get your dick chopped off and then suck a million cocks.

Oh wait, you mean the one joke where you go undercover in a dress? FFVII called. Not their fault you jack off to it.

This desu

I want Liam Neeson as Ganondorf. I don;t care about the rest

Maisie Williams as one of the Goblins

user I'm sorry, but cucks and tranny fags are the label of Nintendo, just like their customers and fanbase

>says the man with that image saved to his computer

Can you give me an example of anything that's been (remade) in the last 5 to 10 years that's actually been exceptional? Remakes/Adaptations are damn near assembly line productions now. I honestly can't understand what would lead you into believing that this is a good idea.

If you enjoy something leave it the fuck alone. Just be happy with what you have.

No. We don't need it.

If I can see Orlando Bloom as another pretty boy elf doing acrobatic shit with a bow, yes please. Add on top Master Sword, and I offer my asshole in all its glory.

Yeah, nevermind the fact that almost all of the "epic"ness of LoTR was one fucking skirmish after another that would never happen in a LoZ movie. But then again LoZ wouldn't be hard.
>Link learns Ganondorf is up to no good and has Zelda
>He's the hero, he gonna do this
>gets BTFO and falls in a river left for dead
that's the first 20 minutes
>found & tended to by an old swordsman
>[hero's journey intensifies]
>first dungeon is old swordsman talking about his life as a sellsword and gives exposition about Ganondorf's rise to power and how he needs Zelda to rebuild the Triforce for that irresistible wish granting ability
>first boss shreks Link but the old swordman kills it
>Link realizes he's in over his head
That's 40 minutes in
>Next we have a fast track training arc where Link trains under the swordsman
>they're tackling dungeons together
>New gear and a bottle
>hot fairies
>red tunic
>hot villagers from Gerudo village
>blue tunic
>hot Zora babes
>Zelda spending years being locked in a tower as a typical damsel in distress
About 3 years pass in this arc. We watch the world get progressively worse and Link's maturation as a human. Somehow drive home that Link feels responsible and has to make things right, but still feels too weak to do so. That's 60 minutes in.
cont.

>plays zelda and mario
>thinks he's not a manchild cuck

>so weak willed he cares what other people think he enjoys

When did "internet macho" become such a fearful, self presenting exercise in faggotry?

>Link's maturation as a human
>Link
>human
Fucking humanwashing. LoZ live action was a fucking mistake.

>time has come to face Ganon
>Ganon: "lol fuck that"
>undead army swarms Link and Swordsman's home
>Old Swordsman says only thing that can save them now is a sword in the Temple of Time.
>tosses Link a device that looks like a handle attached to a small coffee can attached to a really aggressive spike
>the last we see of Old Swordsman is him kicking Link out a window to escape and the sound of sword cutting flesh
>Old Swordsman dies
Arc 4 finished. Movie is now 80 minutes in
>Link journeys to temple of time
>Ganondorf is waiting for him
>Sword is stuck in a pedestal
>[fighting intensifies]
>Link grabs sword in stone, retrieves it
>suddenly massive uppercut tosses Link flying
>Link hookshot's back with the device in previous arc because the hookshot is symbolic of the whole franchise and delivers a death blow
credits start rolling at hour and 40 minutes
>because Disney's bullshit everyone expects something between credits
>link gets to castle tower with Zelda
>reaches the top
>gets the girl and pisses off all the girl power fags
>Ganon shows up
>does his transformation into a pig thing
>ohfuckohfuckohfuck
>battle on the side of the tower with Link hookshotting around slashing Ganondorf
>typical final fight scene with Link hanging by a ledge managing to take Ganondorf's head after losing hookshot
A few more credits
>suddenly shaking
>tower is going to collapse because this is fucking Legend of Zelda
>cut to Gerudo village
>everyone is watching the ower collapes, fearful over their fate
>cut to little girl tugging her mom's clothes
>"where is Link? Where is Princess Zelda"
>"I'm sure they're all right"
>final Credits roll on a static shot of a single lane dirt road leading to the tower
>just before movie ends see two silhouettes, one obviously in a dress riding a small horse side saddle and one limping beside her
>obvious outcome is obvious.png
>Sup Forums will be forever laden with "is Link kill?" memes

You're welcome to make a better story, but if you make Link a one dimensional force of nature like in the games he'll be the same as a certain Disney heroine in a recent movie that isn't going well. That or it'll be the same as the marines in Ultramarines; their behavior fits the lore right but you don't fucking care about any of them.
It's a movie. Link needs to be human, he needs to feel and think and fail and fail again or nobody will connect with him. He also needs to have zero speaking lines at all or it's ruined.

That chink shit is too fucking weird for general audiences, I wouldn't pay to watch it.

does Zelda even have a fucking story?

Or maybe their shouldn't be a shitty zelda movie fuckface. Just make an adventure movie that's not zelda.

That would be a different thread then, genius.

I couldn't insult your shitty ideas there. Well I could, but the likelihood of you seeing it would be lower.

Fuck yourself and your shit movie idea. If you're so fucking clever just write your own fucking movie, instead of trying to mutilate a simple game story and defile it by transforming it into some shitty mutant of a movie.

zelda.gamepedia.com/Ancient_Battle

The joke was that Link is a Hylian, not a human.

Yeah. But Zelda has the potential to be like Dark Souls: a well-liked franchise that appeals to a niche audience.

You couldn't write a Dark Souls movie either. A few lines of background lore and some murals in the environment a movie does not make.

except zelda is shit

Only if Link doesn't talk at all.

Ah shit and I fell for it too. Totally did not see that coming.

I'm a bit done with 'epic trilogies' and forced pop-culture phenomenons at the moment