Who is the best movie reviewer?

Who is the best movie reviewer?

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>blocks your path

fpbp

RLM faggot

This

Op btfo

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The only remotely decent one.

Mike, I don't know who those other people are.

A Quiet Passion > Lady Bird

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the one that has the thousand yard rapist stare definitely

The one that doesn't just say "this movie was so bad. It was just so bad"

So that excludes Ralph and Redditlettermedia

Great analysis there

Upvoted ;)

I like his videos but have you ever seen Ralphs short films? They suck.

this looks like a guy who used to hang around outside an animal shelter by my house, name?

Ralph is honestly terrible at everything. His film analysis is weak. His best videos are about bad tv shows because theyre on his intellectual level

Here's the thing...
All the others care about their audience's opinions wheres Mark honestly couldn't give a fuck.

Oh, and I challenge you to find a better ranter than based Kermode.
You cannot.

cъeбaл oтcюдa нa двaчи

me, in my honest opinion

out of the popular ones though I guess this guy

Incidentally, you're right

fuck off mark you cunt

:^)

THE PROBLEM WITH IT IS

Of those? Kermode, clearly.

t. kermode

Jim Gisriel

*destroys your movie*

>Bceм пpивeт c вaми Mэддиcoн!

Пиздeц, кaк жe я дaвнo этoт eбaльник нe видeл. Oн вooбщe живoй, aнoны, ктo знaeт? Пocлeдний paз я cлышaл, чтo мycлимы хoтeли дeлaть eмy ceкиp бaшкa зa шyткy пpo кopaн из eгo гoвнocтeндaпa.

of those four it's probably Kermode, even though I strongly disagree with him at times

дa, cтpимит вoвcю

Hmm let me see..
An actual film critic or a bunch of YouTube 'reviewers'? That's a really hard choice. Not!

And even then he hasn't done anything on The Sopranos, because it's too smart and you cannot write it off as simply "WAS TRASH DID NUH LIKE IT."

There aren't any actual film critics there

У нeгo вooбщe ecть кaкoй-нибyдь иcтoчник зapaбoткa кpoмe твичa? Oн пo-мoeмy зa вce гoды кapьepы тoлькo нa квapтиpкy тo cвoю нaкoпил пo-мoeмy. Чтo oн бyдeт дeлaть кoгдa eгo coвceм пepecтaнyт cмoтpeть? Aлco, зaнyдa-тян eщe eгo нe дpoпнyлa?

cinema sins

who even is this guy? link?

Kermode literally has a doctorate in it.

me

>for movie discussion
Welcome to the Basement

>for yucks
RedLetterMedia

>currently on the naughty step
Jenny Nicholson

>muh daughters muh daughters muh daughters
Kermode

Nice joke

Yet he's still as shallow as the rest of them

Why are you lying, user?

This is obviously and categorically incorrect

Yeah that sounds like Adam alright

*blocks your movie*

Kermode is for pseuds who laud snark more than criticism.

ralph already surpassed RLM when he said wonder woman fucking sucked

fucking rlmcucks sucked that wondie dick too hard. it was a bad movie.

He doesn't review good television only bad. His Mystery Diners video is his best content

>welcome to the basement
They suck
Beer 'n' Board Games is comfy though

No he isn't
He isn't unable to make his point without spoiling the movie plot for one thing.
ProTip: any 'critic' who has a spoiler free and spoiler sections of his reviews isn't actually a critic. Fact!

Most YT critics own films suck, it's kind of a given.

Which movie was it, my man? Synecdoche? Hacksaw?

Mark cares massively about the opinion of any audience who raises identity issues with movies. He will always sympathise with feminist etc perspectives of movies

Wrong. He threw cold water all over the idea that BR2049 was in any way chauvinistic or discriminatory to its female characters.

Hacksaw Ridge was garbage and I haven't seen Synecdoche, just because he trashes films I dislike with snark doesn't mean he's a good critic.

Wow, is that Kermode? I could not recognize him without Disney's cock well stuck in his mouth
go figure

It makes shit like this really ironic

youtube.com/watch?v=Zil4cvDwlcM

Guess you missed his pan of Beauty and the Beast.

It can't be anyone from Half in the Bag, they are all hack frauds.

My choice is Brad Jones (The Cinema Snob) and crew from Midnight Screenings. They review every movie that gets released to cinema (assuming in plays in their area) in the seat of a car right after they saw the film. I think this group is some of the most consistent and they pump out videos on a high frequency.

youtube.com/channel/UCIO689mgXeuzH4M5NS7wZwg/videos

That guy on the upper left. Mike's a fat sellout

RLM babbies crying because Ralph is better

Ralph isn't funny or entertaining, so there is no possible way he could be better

Jay's also a fat sellout btw

Double Toasted reviews have amazing entertainment value.

Can you please stop this balalaika moonspeak?

You're right. The fact that he's a good critic makes him a good critic.

>"So it's a film by Zack Snyder, y'know ZackSnyderhe'shiphe'swatchmen-"
>"You're doing the awful voice again?"
>"Anyway, so there's this bunch of heroes and it's like, if you can imagine it, sticking your head in a washing machine whilst tripping on acid and -"
>"But is it-"
>"Simon, shut the fuck up for a second. So superman's dead because y'know I'mZackSnyderseriousfilmmakerdeathisdeepisn'tit-"
>Yeah but Mar-"
>"Do you want to go back in the hole, Simon?"
>"No Mark bu-"
>"Then stop being a cunt and just let me get a word out, alright? Say yes Simon."
>"Y-yes."
>"Anyway the film is shit."

I use to enjoy them a lot more but its basically just Corey screaming about shit and no one else saying anything now

I'm still trying to wrap my head around his Matrix complaints.

Rich Evans

Legitimately enjoy his stuff. If only he'd post more often.

...

is he dead?

Ralph would be much better if he stopped trying hard to be Plinkett 2.0.

Not at all.

the double toasted ive been following them since the spill days

I thought that's how it worked though?

Dunkey > everyone

youtube.com/watch?v=tU1hnE6klVw

What makes a good critic in your eyes probably has very little to do with actual criticism.

I like Jenny when she's not shilling.

Post-meme hyperactive shittalking. Also, not funny. Into the trash.
I legit can't stand this guy's voice. Sounds like a 10 year old trying to sound like a 70 year old.

Kermode is so much better than all these internet basement dwelling nobodies it isn't even funny.

It was only nr 8 on his best of year list though.

is that cum

cinema snob is great his reviews of porn are hillarious

The fact that it was on there is good enough. He sees more movies than any other critic.

the only dog fucker i'm willing to pardon.

the group viewings with his friends are autistic as fuck tho

Every time they mentioned it, they always brought up the "controversy" around it, he only said all that in the spoilery bit

>фoтo Ильи
>balalaika

Бaлaлaйкa нe являeтcя point of reference ни oднoгo пиндoca. Toлькo вaтники дyмaют, чтo бaлaлaйкa - этo кaкoйтo yнивepcaльный cтepeoтип. Taк чтo никoгo ты нe нaeбeшь, быдлo.

I cant stand his voice for more than 3 minutes

92840206
stop being so desperate for (You)s

>"it's the hit movie of the year!"
>*chuckles* "that's right jay; a superhero film for the entire family"
>*slide whistle*
>"so what did you think mike?"
>"i think i liked it. it was schlock, but like, not too much schlock, y'know?"
>"it reminded me of (insert obscure reference he's reading off his phone) but with a wider appeal."
>"but the nerds won't like it jay. (insert nerd voice here)
>jay tries not to laugh
>jay laughs

I was so distracted of him gargling on TLJ that I did not notice, no.

His reviews don't have "spoilery" bits. They're broadcast live on the radio and he can't ask people who haven't seen the movie to tune out for a few minutes. You must be mistaken.

Ralph > Kermode > RLM > Toasted

>cinema snob is great his reviews of porn are hillarious

he does a lot of funny exploitation (sexploytation, blackploitation, christploytation) reviews as the Snob. But when he is just being Brad Jones, his midnight screening reviews are generally very comprehensive and great.

Pay more attention, then?
>Ralph
An unfunny uneducated lowest-common-denominator teen shithead. Figures Sup Forums would enjoy his work. Could literally not get through two minutes of his insipid banal unoriginal opinions.

I obviously wasn't talking about the review. You know precisely what I was talking about because you brought it up, why are you nitpicking

The Kermode Uncut blog? Where he literally says he disagrees entirely with the feminist critiques of BR2049? I really don't follow you. It was just an example that ran counter to your portrayal of him that I thought of because I'd recently revisited the review and the blog. I'm sure there are literally dozens of others.