Spider-Man #19

Boring-Ass storytime....

YES miles storytime.

And I mean REALLY fucking boring....

And I can already tell that review sites will give it a 9 out of 10.

...any Bombshell?

...

Nope.

So college girl and Gawke are a item now. Whohaddunt.

...waaaaait a second...this whole issue is about Ganke, isn't it?

Is ganke going to be killed?

Well that was pointless.

It wasn't pointless, giggling fangirls giggled insanely over that. You know, giggly fangirls.

Goldballs still feeling the effects of the cucking.

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...

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I flipped through this comic.

This is pretty dull. Bendis is really phoning it in.

Bendis has been phoning it in for years. It's what happens when you write like 6 books a month or whatever he does.

Kek.

Oh. It's just a pointless filler dream.

...

Do your fucking schoolwork fag

*gasp*

So Miles has time to play videogames, play paintball and watch TV with the Champions but now with his supposed best friend?

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What the fuck even is this dialouge.

I feel like this could all have comfortably fit on three pages.

Bendis has been phoning it in since Avengers Disassembled, where he got the freedom from editors to do whatever he wants.

Ok I will admit this is cute.

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Jesus christ who the hell cares.

This bait and switch was not worth the buildup.

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Jesus christ who needs an entire fucking issue dedicated to the possibility of a name change.

Cleavage?

SJW!!!!!

I still don't get why the cops didn't arrest him. He's a wanted fugitive that escaped from jail multiple times.

...

The cleavage is somehow the most interesting thing in this issue so far.

But Hammerhead DID beat Miles, the only reason Miles isn't dead is because Goldballs saved him.

New character? Old revamp one?

Probably pay off the cops or lawyers or judges.

...

He's getting played

Did he pay off SHIELD too?

I think she might be a minor deadpool character.

And done.

This was a complete waste of my time doing.

I get why they had that dream sequence at the start now.
Without it there would have been asolutly nothing fucking happening all issue.

Can you do Jessica Jones and Avengers?

So who's this fucko?

I'll say. Literally nothing happened.

There's a storytime with Superman on fucking vacation with his family that had more happen than this issue

>44 texts

oh no

And then she joins the Sinister Six.

SOON

worst girl

Ganke, weren't YOU the one who insisted Miles be Spider-man in the first place?

Why would people buy a spider man book where there is no spider man or powers or anything, just miles talking to his friend for twenty pages?

Why did Bendis decide to devote a whole issue to the supporting cast when they already dominate 75-80% of the comic?

I doubt Bendis cares about what's going on with Miles in other people's books.

good other feel the same about him else they'd have no personality development with Miles.

Thanks, OP.

My God

I don't hate this book as much as everyone else, but the actual fuck was this issue?

This issue was wathever

i like this artist. doesnt hold back on the chubby

It's such a shame that Hammerhead finally gets used as a major villain again and finally gets to stomp a hero again, but it's in such a lame comic by a lame writer.

I also think Hammerhead working for Black Cat is stupid. This is the guy that not only hunted down Felicia like a dog before, but has managed to go neck and neck with Cage and Ironfist before.

>People just talking and talking about nothing

Yup, it's a Bendis comic alright

Yes Miles, Talk about how you are actually spider-man in front of more people, especially people whom are actually being paid to listen to you incase you ask for something.

>44 text
Thirsty

>not one man gank

Miles' book was never great or anything but it was never this bad.

>"The new and improved Spider-Goldballs"
>110/10, 10m sold in the first week.

Does Bendis not know where to take this comic?

Part of me thinks the wheel-spinning is due to not wanting to give Miles things that'll be appropriated by MCU Peter later

(e.g. Lego-Loving Ned in Homecoming)

It's funny really... Miles survived the end of the Ultimate Universe only to be perpetually trapped in Peter's shadow

Does Miles have his own villains or just he just fight Peters villain set

I wish.

Here's the biggest secret about Miles' ongoing: Bendis doesn't actually give a fuck about Miles. Miles is just a vehicle for him to write about his supporting characters. He clearly cares more about Ganke, Jefferson, Rio and even Goldballs than Miles. Even back in the Ultimate Universe, he spent a significant amount of each issue on what Gwen or Aunt May were up to. The Roxxon arc was more about Spider-woman, Bombshell and Cloak & Dagger than Miles. There was an entire arc about Jefferson, and the Ultimate Civil War tie-in arc spent more time on Jefferson dealing with the hydra insurgents than Miles did.

He clearly hasn't known where to take it since Miles was brought to 616.

Then why is he even there and why does the company keep trying to push him?

> "Bendis, Spiderman sales are not low enough! We want America Chavez-type sales, can you do something about it?"
> "I'm on it boss!!!"

Well, that was a waste of space & time.

< joins and leads the Sinister Six.

So that's how Ganke remembers it? He doesn't remember about Ultimate Peter kicking the bucket?

>former agent
>bowler hat

Dum Dum Dugan

It's fucking Jason Macendale isn't it? Goddammit Bendis!

It seems to be building at least 3 story arcs

>Lana wanting Miles dick/Goldballs getting cucked
>Hammerhead wanting to kick Miles ass
>Rio/Jefferson drama

Sure, we didn't get the payoff in this issue, but the foundation for bigger things is being laid out. That's how Bendis writes. Slow burn building up to something else. Don't expect to get closure out of any one single issue.

Well, yeah, this is 616 Ganke: he doesn't remember Peter dying because in his universe Peter was never unmasked or killed.

It *is* 1616 Miles, who survived the death of the Ultimate universe because of interdimensional travel bullshit.

We won't find out anything about 616 "Scarface" Miles until the next issue of Spider-Men II.

Jesus Christ, this is embarrasing

So Miles will change his code name?