The Great X-Men Storytime - Vol. 5: Fall of the Mutants (Part 17)

Christmas is early for X-Factor!

PREVIOUSLY ON X-MEN:

>and then Jean let them all fall to their deaths

Jesus Rusty, not very tactful are ya?

when does this get fun

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This issue is pretty much nothing but MUTANT ANGSTâ„¢, so I guess it depends on your definition of fun. I'm just gonna sit here and enjoy the Walt Simonson art.

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Knock off the Batman act, Warren.

Oh boy, here we go again...

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I love the way Simonson draws Iceman's powers.

I just don't like this team really

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>Like something out of a Star Wars movie
Oh, for crying out loud...

Who does really
Other than Kurt Busiek that is

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Well, I guess this is a Christmas gift as good as any.

Aw, Leech.

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Oh Jean, you and your conspiracy theories.

Classic New York.

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Angst with actual payoff, what a rare thing in a X-Men comic.

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but seriously when will the team change at all

>Guest-starring: THE INHUMANS
Oh fuck.

But hey, at least it's written by Jo Duffy.

At least he's nice enough to wish them merry christmas before killing them.

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Everybody likes Christmas, even a Ra-worshipping pagan like Paco Lips!

>X-user is back and seemingly doing regular storytimes and the mega might soon be updated.

Life is good, folks.

I am almost certain the line up doesn't change. The whole 'point' of this book initially to be a place where the original five X-Men could have adventures, now that they were a little older and a little wiser.

I think if they kept Jean dead and let Dazzler onto the team like they originally intended, the series could have been a lot better.

Hey, at this point, the Inhumans were great. Seriously, if they were pushed by people like Priest, the way he intended, instead of Soule things would have been great.

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I never, ever liked the Inhumans and I mantain that people kept writing them wrong and are now irreversibly fucked. If I ever got my grubby hands on them I would reboot them, I even got a whole publishing plan and overarching plot figured out in my head, it's kind of weird.

... I am intrigued.

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It's really raw and unfinished so far, basically I would relaunch the characters completely and launch two initial ongoings and one mini, the ongoings would be about the court of the Inhumans and all their intrigues and backstabbing, I would introduce dukes and counts and barons, and make Old Attilan and New Attilan city-states reigned over by them, with the different nobles ruling over different parts of it, and the King and Queen over all of them. I would also introduce the idea of bigotry among Inhumans, and how the less human-like ones are second class citizens, and Gorgon and Triton are seen as the "pets" of the royal family. The other ongoing would be the nuHumans done right, with a more genuine look at what a group of millennial superheroes would look like, none of that masturbatory bullshit Marvel publishes nowadays, I would try to write it as fair yet also critical as possible, and no, I wouldn't make them a bunch of self absorbed social media-crazed idiots, I think millennials, despite what Sup Forums may tell you, are a bit more complicated than that. Oh, and the Alpha Primitives would still be around and used as slaves. The last series, the mini, would be a retelling of their story, from their creation all the way to the present. I would keep some aspects that I like from previous runs, but most of it is going out, like those garbage not-X-Men Soule wrote.
Anyway, that's the broad strokes of it, there's also other details I forgot to mention, like that I would give them their own language and architecture, and I would even create a map for New Attilan, shit like that. There's also a fourth solo series but I don't want to get into it right now because, hey, I'm hoping this won't just be glorified fanfiction and I'll see it published some day, at least one hopes.

Shit...that sounds good. Although I don't think it could work in the 616 verse, if you did a stand alone verse based on this concept, it would be great. I hope one day you work at Marvel X-user, either as a X-Writer or an Inhuman one.

Or an Eternals one, because I have feeling you might be good at that too

Sorry bout that break, we're back in business now.

Aw man, thanks a bunch. Yeah, it's funny, I like the X-Men a lot more than the Inhumans (as in, I actually do like the X-Men), but I have more ideas on how I'd "fix" the Inhumans. I would like to do a X-Men series eventually, but definitely not Uncanny or whatever is the main series then.

Also fuck yes Eternals, that does sound fun, especially since unlike the Inhumans they haven't been ruined by anyone so far (other than, arguably, Sersi joining the Avengers, that was weird)

This art makes the Inhumans look even goofier than usual.

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Fair enough. Hopefully one day you will work there, I'd love to see what you can come up with the X-Men. As for 'fixing the Inhumans' I get that. It is an interesting concept, and you already have a per-established cast so you have a bit to work with.

Out of curiosity, what is your favorite X-Kid generation?

Oh look, it's CG-Dog.

>"fix" the Inhumans

I mean the status quo of ruling over the Kree was one ripe with possibility, they didn't even bring Ronan back to The Moon with them.

Royals is doing something with that. Goddamn it, I love that book. Mainly because Erwing doesn't hide or justify the fact that most of the power he has as members of the crew are awful people. Yet somehow, he makes you care about their journey.

Oh man, that's a tough one. It's definitely between the X-Babbies, Gen X, and the Academy X kids.

I think I'm going to have to go with the New Mutants, if only because, well, they were really genuine kids. Bob McLeod designed the hell out of them, making them look like actual kids instead of whatever teen singer was in vogue or whatever. They're also really likeable and they're the only generation so far that has been allowed to grow up and become adults, and sure, maybe they didn't take over the "old" X-Men, but they're still a bunch of cool characters that remain well-liked and with a decent fanbase.

Eh, it definitely had possibilities, but after the whole Soule/nuHumans fiasco, I really do believe the whole thing is utterly ruined. I don't know, I feel like you could have built a really cool, morally grey sci-fi franchise out of them and they kept trying to force them into being superheroes, which wouldn't really jive with what I'd do with them.

>the dog would attack children
Worst petfu desu

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Is the dog a traitor too
It's all really confusing

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I miss straight Iceman
Nothing beats the original

Fair enough. The New Mutants are pretty great, I don't think you'll have anyone disputing that. I do like the fact that they have grown up a bit, I think that is great.

Me personally, it's the Academy X kids, but I presume nostalgia plays a big part in that as they were the ones I grew up with.

I wish that they grew up and had their place on teams in modern marvel. Then again considering the state of some of the titles...

if Dazzler was on the team, I'd be 100% down
her solo was weird but fun

I don't get why people don't make fun of Medusa more often, she's literally the Aquaman of the Inhumans. Lamest power ever.

Iceman has fans? Huh, go figure.

Yeah, I think it's better to give them a rest for now. At least they didn't die of Terrigen poisoning, not that I know of anyway.

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Aw shit, gotta go walk the dog, brb

now I cant help but see this as flamboyant behaviour

I think the only X Factor I like is the one with Maddrox, and also the AoA in which Cyclops has one eye and Havok wants to kill him to get his job

the only new mutants I like are Wolfsbane and Karma. I do think Magma should be an Omega Mutant.

I liked Tarot and Empath from the Hellions, Catseye too.

In Generation X I liked Emma and Banshee more than the pupils. I would like Monet more if she still were two twins who can fuse into a super powerful mutant super saiyan style. I guess I like Penance too, and Mondo only as in his power is cool.

I think the Morrison kids were the best ones, I always want Ernst to become Cassandra Nova Xavier, and I like the Cuckoos and Glob too.

After them I like Hellion, Blindfold, Eyeboy (in my mind he should be super bullseye, telescopic vision, microscopic, infra red, x ray, 360 degrees, perfect aim, perfect measuring by sight, slow motion vision which would give him super human speed, he could even shoot beams from an eye) and Sharktits.

The best Teen books are Claremont new mutants, and the first years of Gen X.

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Haha

Generation X got me into comics and I'm constantly confused why nothing is as fun

Man, Iceman here looks more like fucking Crystar than anything.

A giant ice sculpture on top of a skyscraper seems like a significant safety hazard

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Ah yes, remember when the Inhumans were nothing but Fantastic Four supporting characters? Good times.

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>WHAMMO!

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>ooh ooh ooh ooh
kek

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Whoops, something just turned up, gotta run, see ya next time, yadda yadda yadda.
Thanks for reading!

Courtesy bump.

I missed the New Mutants story time, but I'll catch up.

The X-Men proper storytimes, and the Excalibur ones, those are the issue.

X-user please, this isn't BRIAN MICHAEL BENDIS'S ALL NEW, ALL DIFFERENT JEAN GREY

I like how incredulous Bobby is towards the X-Men dying, as he speaks to a woman he's known to have died.

There is very little that Simonson draws that isn't top tier during this period. He's a bit more... unrefined now in his older years. Might be the product of things going so digital though.

Jean is actually a good example of why they would still be alive. Remember that at this point the explanation for Phoenix/Jean is that the real Jean was still at the bottom of the bay while a the Phoenix force created a copy of her that died on the moon.

Trish is the worst girlfriend.

Better than some future Jean-based interactions they're faced with.

Namely the Shiar murdering them, because reasons.

Artie and Leech alone justify this book's existence.

Like... 91, when it switches wholesale to Peter David's Freedom Force replacement as the O5 rejoin the X-Men and banish Havok to eventual heel turns.

Hey, the kid really liked the Myrrh he brought on the first Christmas, so he's been celebrating ever since.

I struggle to imagine a way that Dazzler would have worked in this book at all.
Having even a moderately successful celebrity on the team would have rendered the double agent mutant hunters thing even more ridiculous, she had little connection to basically any of the guys, and wouldn't have been a unifying factor almost certainly being the center of a Bobby-Hank-Warren love tug of war.

late x-bump

Basically this annual was them cleaning up Englehart's wholesale character assassination of Quicksilver, given that he had Crystal whore around on him and rather than have Crystal treated as the villain, made Quicksilver become "evil" and everyone shit on him for not being a good little cuckold.

One of the last issues of Dazzler (when she got her spandex aerobics outfit) revealed that she had been secretly training with Scott for a while, to train her in how to use her powers properly beyond just randomly blinding people.

They could have her be Scott's protege and do a love triangle between her and Iceman and Angel while coping with Beast's ex Vera showing up in full New Wave scene whore mode, potentially exposing her role in the team.

That said, they really should have just made Maddie=Jean, damn what Claremont said and wanted. It would have been the easiest fucking way to cut the gordian knot of how to get rid of Maddie while preserving what Claremont did with Scott's character by having him wed Maddie.

The Logistical dangers of Ice Powers are almost invariably handwaved away with rule of cool.