“That’s a pretty big wand you got there, Potter. Overcompensating for something?”

>“That’s a pretty big wand you got there, Potter. Overcompensating for something?”

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ywn a femdraco

"NO!"

Why did they put as many cop movie tropes into harry potter? I guess the confusion was meant to distract from its status as one of the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises. Each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody, just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowlings mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read Harry Potter you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

absolutely 100% based

Why are all your threads always such fucking garbage, mobile numale?
Why are you so bad at posting?

Moar FemDraco pls

i only enter these threads for this based man and then leave

Should’ve just launched into “Overcompensating? Maybe for its status as one of the dullest franchises in the history of movie franchises.”

Weaker than usual. I'd wait a few more posts for a better hook.

if dubs she gets blacked instantly

:(

This, but unironically.

>no femdraco vs hermoine bitch fights
it hurts

i just want a scene where harry's got femdraco on her knees deep throating him is that too much to ask?

femdraco should be fucked in the ass with her hair pulled back

pleb taste
for slytherins, it should always be in the missionary position with the sole purpose of reproduction to produce genetically superior wizards

checked und agreed

>not wanting a bj from femdraco

>b0buh the slitherins
shut the fuck up, retard
it's HARRY fucking femdraco, some bitch who's been on his case for years
she's getting it in the ass and that's that

Why is she so smug?

god i wish that was me

>Gryffindor=against the wall, standing, cowgirl
>Slytherin=bondage shit, low-key missionary
>Ravenclaw=Doggy so they can still study
>Huflepuff=Anal because they're too stupid to find the pussy

She's superior and she knows it.

>not wanting to see femdraco stalk harry and bully him into making a pureblood baby with her
plebeians

>you=faggot

harry's not pureblooded
shit fanfic

>hufflepuff- virgins
ftfy

they really should have made malfoy a girl, it would have been so much better

>Ayn Rand
Absolutely trash

t. collectivist commie faggot

I'm an ethno nationalist.

A genderswapped Harry Potter would be fantastic. I want my magic Mean Girls. One of the few times I'd say good work, Tumblr.

then you're equally retarded, just retarded in the opposite direction

>then you are equally retarded
What about arguments, smart guy?

What is your ethnicity and gender?

Caucasian male
Instead of being infatuated with ideology, I try to look at things objectively and make my own individual conclusions.

lol gay

That's what I thought, you are a "man" without balls or instincts. Stop eatning so much soy.

>Instead of being infatuated with ideology, I try to look at things objectively and make my own individual conclusions.
Me too. This is not an argument.

kek, get more presumptuous and project harder, pinko
if you want peer-reviewed sources for every opinion, then straight back to r3ddit you go

No, I want some arguments. Clearly you are just a soyboy and less of a man.

>first female of his age Harry meets
>he and Draconia hit it off well
>become actual friends despite being sorted into different houses
>rather than a forced, horribly written rivalry, a tragic friendship that manages to hold despite the two growing further and further
>Harry wonders often whether he was supposed to be in Slytherin with Draconia. All of his problems would be gone; no conflict between friends, his Parseltongue would make sense
>book 5-6 their friendship frays horribly, ending with Harry carving her up with Sectumsempra (seriously, imagine how emotional that would have been, slashing up your longtime friend and partial love interest in the heat of the moment)
>covering for him at Malfoy Manor actually makes sense
>Harry sees Snape's memory of Lily and realises they actually have something in common

Stay based my friend

To be fair the ideas are sound but Ayn Rand's books are garbage

BASED!

The meme pic invalidates everything else but I applaud your tenacity forcing this pasta. Have this (you) and carry on

Unironically far better than anything ham-fisted JK feminism shit
Nicely done user

It would be more humiliating for her if he made sweet and tender love to her. Forcing her to have intimate sex is worse than rape.

>femdraco but with a feminine penis
I'd go to theaters, pay a ticket and watch this

muh fuggin DICK

Who dis?

>"Look girls, if it isn't the famous Harry Potter. You think you're such a big man now, don't you Potter? Well I'm sure you won't mind showing us just how big you really are."

>Tattoo

Based "No!" posters

She needs BIG ASIAN COCK

I want a scene where femDraco and Harry are having some sort of conflict and then Harry draws his wand and femDraco pauses for a second before walking slowly over to him, putting the tip of his wand in her mouth and licking it in a sultry manner (with the implication that the wand could be a penis)

subtext is very arousing

Based Mein Kampf poster.

>Instead of being infatuated with ideology, I try to look at things objectively and make my own individual conclusions.
>doesn't realize this in itself is an ideological statement
Mein Gott...

>missionary
Fuck off Satan

...

>with the implication that the wand could be a penis
wow, thanks, i never would've picked up on that if you hadn't written that part

>with the implication that the wand could be a penis
Thanks man, I really didin't get it until you explained.

You lost me.

i mean pureblood or not it wouldn't be too far fetched for harry to have his own harem after saving the wizard world, i'm sure a few slytherins would try to get in on that

>everything is ideology, so nothing is
great rape of the english language dickbags

femdraco is pure

we sucker punch now

who's this poor mans Natalie Dormer?

Eesh this one is rough huh
Not your day

>le hack conservitard objectivist """""philosopher"""" of 1300 page garbage lit

Socrates debunked her retarded bullshit literally 2500 years ago

i didn't know he'd done a follow up

*these based men
it's a copypasta

shut da fuck up

tsundere femdraco would be better

This is an old /lit/ pasta circa 2012

Kino.

>chinese fireball oooooooooooo

hufflepuffs are dumb happy sluts. ravenclaw are the introverted autists who stick to lewd wizard webcomics and shit. probably weebs too

women with tattoos are ALWAYS trouble. they're trying to cover something up

someone hire this man he has a gift

It's pasta?! Thank god you were here to tell us.

t. "individualist" bootlicker that will gladly prep his own wife for the "almighty jahbgiver".

based bada bing bada boom man

Wizards probably wouldnt date since they could mindfuck anyone into being sex slave or lover, a wizard boy could look at any gorgeous muggle girl or wizard girl and make her fall in love with him while a wizard girl would have a harem of brainwashed Chads.

>make my own individual conclusions.

The Legion is their numbers, kek.

>(with the implication that the wand could be a penis)
Oh so that was it

>Hitler and Rasputin

>hufflepuffs are dumb happy sluts
sounds like the best house to me

>students can drug each other with love potions and have no consequences
hogwarts was pretty fucked up

>t. Commie cock puppet

Not so different you an i.

in a lot of ways, yeah

Nigga what are trying to say?

>putting the tip of his wand in her mouth and licking it in a sultry manner
What is the implication of this?

it's implied that hypothetically femdraco would do the same thing to a penis, given the opportunity

...

I need a female tough but hot crabb and goyle please

i was born in that feel, molded by it

good taste

>youtube.com/watch?v=zqSlOIqyT7k

absolutely BASED centrist where my /sargon/ bros at
#liberalists
#bothsidesaredumb

Oh what could have been.

>with the implication that the wand could be a penis