What’s a historical event that would make a kino movie?

What’s a historical event that would make a kino movie?

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en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_for_Castle_Itter
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Cortez when he first makes contact with the Aztecs

not exactly a historic event but based in one while being fiction, I would like to see a miniseries adaption of Northwest Passage by Kenneth Roberts

Harambe

>not the Inca empire’s downfall at the hands of Pizarro

My home videotapes

Your mother's stay in the delivery room. The earth hadnt seen a retarded faggot of such magnitude born until that day.

Andrew Jackson biopic

napoleon's whole life

>LE I KNOW MORE OBSCURE HISTORY THAN U
fuck off spic no one gives a fuck about that shit.

How is that obscure?

Abatar 2

I would want something about Teddy and Taft. Imagine the kino when they run against each other in 1912

Three Kingdoms would be kino. Like actual kino instead of FLYING FIGHTING.

Winged Hussars
Constantinople
More WW1 stuff.

Polish Winged Hussars
Hannibal crossing the Alps on elephants
Cortez and friends
Magellan
Gilles de Rais
Ancient Babylonian paganism
Diogenes biopic
Something exploring old Roman festivals like early Valentines Day or Saturnalia
Medieval kino about sacrificing humans that end up being found as bog bodies 1500 years later
Plague doctors as more serious players in the 1300s
Charlemagne's paladins
Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec
Bela Kiss

Cast them

the holocaust

The Greeks
The childhood story of Buddha
Franz Ferdinand getting his pudding splattered

You mean what really happened?

Yeah I'd like to see a kino about workers performing plays and raising rabbits and horses and such. Would be a nice slice of life movie.

Not sure on specific historic events, but movies based on feudal Japan and the conquest of the Americas would be pretty kino.

>no Gilles de Rais period horror/thriller
Why is hollywood so gay?

This man’s entire life
>Ungern was an arch-conservative pan-monarchist who aspired to restore the Russian monarchy under Grand Duke Michael Alexandrovich of Russia and to revive the Mongol Empire under the rule of the Bogd Khan. During the Russian Civil War, Ungern's attraction to Vajrayana Buddhism and his eccentric, often violent treatment of enemies and his own men, earned him the sobriquet "the Mad Baron". In February 1921 he expelled Chinese troops from Mongolia and restored the monarchic power of the Bogd Khan. During his five-month occupation of Outer Mongolia, Ungern imposed order on the capital city, Ikh Khüree, through fear, intimidation, and brutal violence against his opponents, particularly Bolshevik supporters.

>In June 1921 he went on to invade East Siberia in support of supposed anti-Bolshevik rebellions and to head off a Red Army-Mongolian partisan invasion; this action led to his defeat and capture two months later. He was taken prisoner by the Red Army and a month later put on trial for counterrevolution in Novonikolaevsk. After a six-hour show trial he was found guilty, and on 15 September 1921 he was executed.

Kino

Zimmerman trial

Liam Helmsworth as Cortez
John Leguizamo as Montezuma
ScarJo as female Alvarado
Miguel as Montezuma's musical brother
I'd like a Justinian II film and a Papal Schism one directed by Mel Gibson, imagine a war of the 3 popes Christian kino

iktfb

Justinian II is too edgy
Better a kino about Basil the Bulgar Slayer

add some Khazar milkers from 1000 AD and you got a deal

Jewish persecution of the early Christian church

hindenburg reboot

>God will save us from this storm if you swear to forgive those who wronged you
>Fuck that, if God saves me then he wants time to kill them all

Proceeds to kill them all
Where are all the honest leaders who fulfill their promises?

>time
Me
tired phoneposter

Donner Party

Is there more like this

ah-bloo-bloo

No u

probably, i saved it from a thread on teevee a while ago mate

Add Belisarius to that list, kind sir.

It'd appeal to both the Irish-American MUH HERITAGE crowd and the silly DUDE THE VIKINGS WERE SO BADASS XD crowd

14th century papal conflict sounds kino as fuck

This

...

Biopic of Salahuddin, his rise to power and culminating with his victory in the crusades and an epic battle of Hattin

A film about the end of charlemagne's reign with Charlemagne played by Daniel Day Lewis.

>when you know you fucked up big time

got your Academy Award winning soundtrack right here guv

Ever since i watched Apocalyptos ending i craved a Cortez film. Sadly historical epics dont get made in this day and age. Its all about muh superheroes

John Brown's raid on Harpers Ferry Armory..

Czechoslovak legions' journey from European Russia to Vladivostok

fuck off Andrej

Rurik and the creation of Kievan Rus

No

damn that could win an oscar

This is the only right answer

The siege of Munster has it all
Sex, madness, torture, more madness and communal sharing of wives and genuinely bizarre characters
Dan browns podcasts wet my appetite for 12 part miniseries
If only German TV had a few euro to spare

samefag
harambe is reddit as shit, eat my dick Sean it was NEVER fucking funny
take your (You) and get your fat faggot face out of here

Aleister Crowley's failed attempt to climb K2. I've wanted this movie made forever. The mutiny scene and subsequent death of several climbers would be kino indeed.

Check out the Cradle of Filth album Godspeed On The Devil's Thunder. It's very cinematic and the closest thing you'll get. Doug Bradley (Pinhead from Hellraiser) does spoken word pieces as Gilles throughout.

Thanks for the rec user, noted.

Why does Archduke Ferdinand look like Mario

Because be was shot by a demon furry

i dunno bro i didn't draw it i only posted it

this

I'd love to see a movie about another non-Lincoln president

Leo was set to play Teddy I thought.

The Great Emu War

ah-bloo-bloo

An adaptation of Oliver Wiswell, a kick-ass story of the American Revolution told from the Loyalists' point of view.

Korean independence movement from 1910. Would make for great science fiction if you rejig the setting.

The real Mulan

Somerton Man would make a very great espionage thriller if done right and padded with enough interesting background.

The Hinterkaifek murders would make a creepy horror movie, especially if you just never saw the killer's face or knew who it was.

>we'll never have Kubrick's Napoleon movie

Disco Demolition Night/Ten Cent Beer Night

I just want to see hapless promoters watching on in horror as a baseball games turns into a bizarre, apocalyptic riot.

The Jewification of the West

Last fall's mass shooting in Las Vegas, told from the perspective of the Mossad perpetrators

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_for_Castle_Itter

But looks like there's a kino coming out later this year.

The Münster rebellion would be the ultimate kino.

>Liam Helmsworth as Cortez
>John Leguizamo as Montezuma
>ScarJo as female Alvarado
>Miguel as Montezuma's musical brother

They could do a bunch of movies about the CIA fucking multiple countries by rigging elections and instigating wars or assassinating leaders of countries

The eastern front from a german devout nazis perspective ,without holocaust tearjerking or extremely exaggeratted massacres and evil for evil sakes commander but a film about war ,with not thousand of moral questions but more like about the war mentality ,abit like apocalyspe now i would do it