What's the single most stupid...

What's the single most stupid, convoluted and downright impractical "master plan" ever featured in a movie or Sup Forums show?

dawn of the dead remake
>lets go to an island but try to drive through hordes of zombies that have shown to have super strength first

who in their right mind would leave the mall

capture dr. pavel
have yourself taken captive in disguise to hand over dr. pavel to CIA
endure super annoying interrogation by CIA
all of this is to find out what dr. pavel told CIA
even though the only reason CIA has dr. pavel is because you just delivered him to him
force one of your men to stay on board and die, even though you yourself just called CIA's bluff about the agency expecting one of them in the wreckage
crash the plane miles away from its wings with the cockpit blown off and a corpse that contains a few drops of dr. pavel's blood
?????
the fire rises, I guess

...

>yfw this flashes before your eyes when you die

They were in the middle of nowhere, why didn't they just kill them from the start?

Skyfall

Lex Luthor in BvS

>Take entire city hostage.
>Say that if anyone tries to intervene you'll blow up the city.
>Later reveal that you were going to blow up the city no matter what.
>Your social expirament literally only served to delay your plan long enough for the hero to stop you.

Genius

they were running out of food.

Sherlock wins, easily.

Not using eagles.

...

Not really. His goal was killing Superman (either as an idol or in the flesh). Had a bunch of options to go with. Wasn't actually dependent on Batman doing it or even playing a major role in it.

*preferably ending the idol and later his life

Oh I don't know, ever heard of a little movie called THE DARK KNIGHT RISES??

ah, a classic

And he did it all just to fuck with Batman for beating R'as Al Ghul in the first movie, on orders from R'as' estranged secret daughter because he's loved her since she was 6

I haven't but it sounds racist

> It's simple, we fuck the Batman

I never quite understood that element of her plan

There was an old shitty film called Reindeer Games with Ben Affleck and Gary Sinise. If I recall correctly, Ben Afflecks best buddy faked his own death to push Ben Affleck down a path that would eventually lead him to rob a casino and kill off Ben Affleck's friends former associates. He shows up at the end and reveals all of this.

It's really fucking dumb.

>Unestablished character.
>Foreign accent.
>Knows about the reactor.
I, personally, was SHOCKED when she was revealed to be a villain.

usual suspects

Whatever Waltz's plan was in Spectre

Literally any season of 24. Every time it seems the heroes have saved the day, it will turn out that everything that happened so far is just a distraction for something bigger.

Also this.

I was going to post this. Talk about retarded.

what was his fucking plan anyway? and was his motivation really as retarded as "daddy is kind to that orphan kid and i dont get enough attention. lets kill them both."

Skyfall and Spectre were both cursed with retarded villain plots but Spectre retconning the other Craig films made it especially egregious.

The Game gets pretty retarded towards the end.

its for this reason i dont get the craig haters on this board. hes not acting badly, they just give him retarded villains and stories to work with. the one time they had a decent story and a decent villain he knocked it out of the park.

>everything goes the heroes way time and time again
>villain at the final shot of the show"all according to plan...muahahahaha"

You PLANNED to be soundly defeated? You PLANNED for impossibly convoluted events to happen? You PLANNED for all this? Fuck you. Pic related.

That fucking wart on her forehead singlehandedly ruined the movie for me.
You cant fucking tell me she cant afford to have it professionally removed.

>accio-dullpasta.jpg
subtle kek

HEEEEEEEEERY POOTER
DIDYOUPUTYOURNAMEINTHEGOBLET ERRY

I disagree about skyfall. His plan workd, he won but then died in the end. I can't even remember spectres plan other than he was arthur from allyearpeign

I liked Skyfall a lot more than Spectre but there was still too much Dark Knight style villain plotting. The bit where Silva lures Bond into the tunnels in perfect timing to detonate a bomb and drop a tube train on him is the worst example. Skyfall's fine but there are major signs of what was going to be so wrong with Spectre.

>hold poo in loo for ransom
>force him to change robocops code
>steal Robocop
>use him to steal shit
>he's actually alive
>he's also dying
>need new Robocop body
>need money
>try to steal money
>Robocops shut down
>wolverines is antagonist too
>is çoding the path to enlightenment?
>chav dies
>lady robot

lel

I forgot about the train thing

god fuck this movie, such potential ruined by that retarded wigger band

why not grow food on the roof?

The worst part is that the trailers were dank as fuck. They made me think chappie was gong to kickstart a new era of artificial intelligence kinos.

Star Wars

This. This, the Plane Scene, the Joker's heist, and Zemo's plan all rely on events entirely outside the antagonist's knowledge or control.

Also Khan from the newer Star Trek movie.

Fall under that category of "Getting caught is part of my plan"

To be fair tube trains are every 2 minutes.

Exactly. He really didn't care who won, though he was pretty obviously betting on Superman.

>ctrl+f
>"vertigo"
>0 results
literally the worst Hitchcock ever.

>guy kills his wife
>hires an impostor, and asks his friend Jimmy Stewart, an ex-cop, to follow her bc she's behaving strangely like she's suicidal, Stewart has to save her a few times from apparently trying to kys
>she then leads Stewart up to a bell tower, knowing that he has a fear of heights, so that he will fall behind, and she and the guy simulate her suicide but throw the real, already dead wife down
>All of this to get Jimmy Stewart to be the perfect witness of her "suicide"
>even though he obviously didn't see her jump
>and noone ever notices the switcharoo
>nor does anyone notice that the body had been dead for days when it's thrown down
fucking 11/10

Casino Royale and Skyfall being part of Blofeld's master plan makes no sense. Le Chiffe was just desperately trying to get back the money he lost before African warlords murdered him and Silva was on a personal vendetta that had no benefit at all except giving him vengeance. But they were working for Blofield all along apparently, and even had special rings that you never saw. It's just a cheap way to build up Blofield as a villain by piggybacking off of the earlier villains, pretending that it was all part of his master plan.

The entire plot of die hard 2

>Planes have enough fuel for loitering for hours above dulless
>can't land in Baltimore or any other airport within gliding distance

>Halfway through the movie a plane crashes on the runway and burns
>End of the movie bad guys plane crashes upon takeoff
>burning wreckage from bad guys plane is used to guide planes in
>but not from the first plane that crashed and burned

>Also in order to get pilots license you have to be trained to land upon loss of instrumentation
>No emergency response vehicles or flares or any kind of temporary lighting on at least one runway

Terrorists should have been laughed at when they made their threats for the many ways this could have been avoided

god's plan for getting rid of all the bad people. uh Lord? you forgot the minorities???

>Harry is protected in the summer holidays because the Dursleys are family and that means he's still protected by his mothers magic.

>Death Eaters don't think of simply killing the Dursleys the second they leave the house then sending 10 death eaters to kill harry straight after.

Zemo arguably had a plot device that would allow him to see into his actions

The Joker getting caught plan would work if it was smaller scale, since he arguably had control over key people. But in the scale that he went, it's nigh impossible, especially the fact that nobody shot him in the head when he started firing bazookas here and there.

TDKR is a mess from start to finish, not single thing makes sense.

Gone Girl was pretty out there, but I liked how she changed her plan midway through

Literally nothing in HP follows any kind of logic with the "rules" of magic that are established in the series.

Bad guys had control over the radio and navigation beacons. Way too high risk of them fucking over the planes again until they were all dead.

How about the phenomenal coincidence of them:

1) Suffering from such catastrophic brain damage that they hook the tech-savvy villain directly into their network, releasing a virus that wreaks havoc on their systems and releases him, and

2) They just so happen to do this at the precise day and time where M will be at a public location providing testimony, and

3) His plan somehow accounted for 1 and 2 in advance, and he knew exactly where M would be and how to get there.

This. Why the fuck does Voldemort take the summers off? He gains nothing from attacking Harry in the wizard fortress where he goes to school surrounded by some of the best wizards in the world, including Dumbledore. It makes no sense that he waits until every spring to attack Harry and his friends.

>be under attack by homicidal maniacs in your school
>oh no the instant kill spell is against the rules, guess we’ll just fight deadly force with stunning and disarmament spells

Harry Potter is blatantly retarded

>need to kill all dumbledores army
>NEED to kill them with magic, on the spot

None of that would have happened if voldemort would have just grabbed the baby and threw him out the window

Why not just eat the zombies?

That's how retarded you sound

Why didn't anyone gun down the wizards?

>death magic is unforgivable
>"garroting gas" that could kill dozens instantly is perfectly fine

>mind control curses are unforgivable
>permanent date rape love potions are fine

Even Pratchett put more care and attention into how magic works than Rowling did and his books were comedies.

someone post the webm with dumbledore

>DID YOU PUT YOUR NAME IN THE GOBLET OF FIYAH HARRY

The better one is that he bombed MI6 so that they would move to a new location underground (which he would somehow know of), so that when he gets caught and put in a cell (which he knows will happen and where), when his master plan goes off and the virus opens his cell, he can retreat into the sewage/subway system which has an entrance right next to his cell (which he knows this already), to be able to escape that way.

And best of all, all of this he knew like months in advance at least, because it was the secret purpose of the MI6 bombing.

Though really what gets my goat the most about that scene is that when the virus goes off and opens all the cells, there's still armed guards (I think it was 2?) between him and escape in a completely open room, while he is totally unarmed. That, and if I recall, he wasn't supposed to be some super skilled fighter anyway, he was mostly just a data analyst and hacker for MI6, not a sort of "in the field" double 0 type spy/hitman.

Not even 007 could believably have escaped just a wide open room with no cover from some armed guards while himself unarmed, but a data analyst did?

it also makes no sense how he didnt see the spell-rebound coming. yeah he cant feel love/is a sociopath/whatever, but he doesnt need to understand the emotion to understand that it could fuck him up. the topic itself is just as much about killing people(about which he is supposed to know everything) as it is about love. i mean, this cant be the first instance in the wizarding world where someone took a bullet for someone else out of love. and here is this great murderer who doesnt see this basic obstacle in his way? how does the greatest killer not know about something like this??

You could probably write a reason like he could sense attempts against his life and fuck over snipers and that he'd mind controlled law enforcement and military but that would require smart writing so she just ignores the elephant in the room for the entire series.

It also never explains why the Wizard world is stuck at Victorian era technology either.

This movie made me really mad with its tonal shifts and moral contradictions. Especially the ending. Holy shit, I forgot how much I hated this movie.

Unfortunately even then it falls short, because Rowling herself said in like a duel or even just random mugging situaiton, a wizard would get utterly BTFO against an armed muggle because a gun would trump a wand and sorcery without question.

it could have ended thirty minutes early and not been as shit

Admiral Purple's brilliant plan in Last Jedi
>top secret plan that no one involved especially the main characters can know the details of
>pretend to not have a plan
>Leia wakes up out of coma to put disobedient male in his place for not trusting in the plan
>the plan is literally to just use cloaking escape pods to get to salt hoth
>somehow hacker man knows this and tells the empire
>Rey can literally see the "cloaked" ships out the window
>the admiral ends up kamikazing because her brilliant plan failed
>they get to salt hoth, where they have one radio which they use to call for help in a galaxy where literally any ship can send distress messages, and no weapons, and no other way to escape

The Joker's getting caught plan was pretty bad, mainly because it relied on this:

1) Sewing a bomb inside a schizo
2) Having to trust a schizo so fucking nuts that he'll *agree* to let you sew a bomb inside him
3) That schizo not getting taken to the hospital immediately because of the tremendous pain he's in
4) Him even being held close enough within the HQ to provide your distraction
5) The explosion disorienting and incapacitating everyone but you

It should have been a gas attack. I'd buy him sneaking implanted nose filters in faster than that shit. And the heist at the beginning relied on everyone doing *precisely* what he expected them to, up to and including how many and which thugs the bank manager would kill, and exactly how far into the bank the bus crash would enter.

wasted potential? What type of potential did you see in the movie? It was fucked from the start. I mean, sure, robots are cool but besides that there wasn't much going on to make me think "wow, this movie could be great if... it wasn't this movie."

so why does nobody just conjure up an uzi with infinite rounds in a fight? firesabout 500 death curses a minute and id have to imagine its easier to aim than a literal stick

I'm throwing an obvious, but Suicide Squad its so stupid its infuriating, I didn't really expect something so inept, i knew it was going to be dumb, but it was trying to break records in incompetence

Voldemort is a metaphor for finals in school.

Also the fact that being a multi-cop killer, in a city like Gotham where the police aren't saints, the moment Batman leaves some cop doesn't just put a bullet in his head.

Though I also thought it was retarded how the Joker in the state he was in after a savage beating which could kill someone from Batman just moments prior, as well as being in a serious truck accident maybe an hour before that, was still able to get the upper hand on that detective in the room with him who wanted to beat him up more.

Wait, why was there a detective in the room with him? It was a locked room, might as well have been a cell.

>Wait, why was there a detective in the room with him?
didn't he want "some time alone" with him to beat him up?

the fat black wannabe tough woman who got her job thanks to some quota fucked up everything thanks to her own incompetence.
sounds realistic to me.

the part where she kills all the CIA guys bothered me

Well wizards don't use guns just because. But why you don't get, say, the British government sending some SAS team after Voldy when the death eaters start doing terrorist attacks on muggles with lots of deaths, and killing muggle politicians, is beyond me.

Pretty sure the difference with Joker's convoluted plans was that he didn't actually care if they worked or not.

IT WAS ALL ME, JAMES. THE AUTHOR OF "OLIVER PAYNE."

I don't think so? I know the detective resorted to doing that, but I don't think he or anyone says why he was in there after Batman leaves.

And if he was in there to beat him up, why was he just standing guard, *until* the Joker started insulting his dead cop friends? You think he'd have waited outside till Batman was gone, then enter and attack the Joker, not be left there to watch him while in the room, and then attack when provoked far enough.

I mean it's still stupid anyway though, the Joker shouldn't be in a state to fight off a child after all he'd been through in the last hour or two. But he beats and holds hostage a seasoned cop.

Why didn't Voldemort just get a knife from the kitchen and stab baby Harry, or throw him against a wall, or choke him or set the house on fire or any other way capable of killing a newborn baby?

This is why he worked so well for the odd episode of Doctor Who but never as a showrunner. He revered smart people like The Doctor should be seen to be, but he's fucking dumb.

Guys, did I get this scene in TDK right?

>Bruce finds the bullet fragments stuck in a wall
>grabs a similar round
>loads it in a completely different gun
>shoots it at a different angle
>at a different distance from the brick
>inside his lab, completely different enviromental conditions
>the data allows him to reconstruct the first bullet
>the reconstruction shows a fingerprint

This is all highly dubious, but not what I really gives me troubles. Again, I have to double check with you guys just in case I am making shit up... but the Joker actually COUNTED on all of that shit to happen? As in, it was part of his plan for Batman to literally conjure up the bullet using bat-magic and find the fingerprint?

The original xXx

>"we can't send in a spy, these guys are EX MILITARY, they can smell a spy a mile away"

Yeah you can't expect a spy to spy on military targets!

Hell, in that fucking fable of the deathly hallows the oldest brother had his throat slit in his sleep. Why don't wizards ever just beat the shit out of each other? Or stab each other? Or poison each other? I'm not talking with some dumbass potion. I just mean something simple like milking some venom from a snake of some kind and putting it in someone's wine.

What does double secret probation even mean

that's why I like the Dresden Files, Harry will punch someone and it will knock them off guard because they're expecting magic, and usually carries a gun on him too.

>bashing little harrys head against the table
>screaming "YOU ARE AN INANIMATE FUCKING OBJECT" at the top of his lungs
damn that would be kino.

I haven't seen it in a long time but this scene always confused me. What was the point?

What plot device would that be? The most egregious parts to me were:

1) He knows what Tony does and doesn't know about his parents' deaths
2) He knows that Cap hasn't confided in Tony with anything about what he suspects about Bucky's involvement
3) He times an EMP down to the precise second he needs to bluff his way into where Bucky's being held, gain access to Bucky's cell, and activate Bucky's programming, and lastly
4) He anticipates that the exact three guys he needs to spring his final trap on will all be part of the team coming to stop him, in spite of them not being in communication with each other or working together in any way

why add all the other shit to his keikaku when he can just hypnosis anyone to do anything

he could just hypnotize him to fuck his own kid in the first place without all the other shit

its just to make things complicated for the sake of being complicated

all of the Nolan Batman movies,even though I still really like them the plots can be quite silly. Thats not to say that there wasn't silly 'master plans' in other batman movies but since the Nolan ones took themselves so seriously the master plans stuck out like a sore thumb

not only that, but "secret ancient magic" is *exactly* the sort of thing that Voldemort, having an autistic knowledge of this stuff, would know about and plan for

The muggle still wins because he can pull the trigger faster than Voldemort can screech a phrase.

I love "plans" like these. I call them "smartarded," meaning "plans and schemes presented in such a way as to portray the villain as a brilliant 12-D chess-level mastermind, but instead revealing that either the writer is retarded or assumes his audience is."