What Would Bendis Do?

If Bendis was put on your favorite title, they he hasn’t worked on yet, what would he do to it?

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But he already ruined Moon Knight, user.

And Iron Man, and Ice Man...

Pretty sure he ruined X-Men. He'd ruin Shazam by replacing Billy Batson with Moon Girl and making Dr. Sivanna a fundamentalist Christian since scientists can't be evil.

For those of us that don´t read Marvel could you give us a quick run down of why he is so awfull?

But he already ruined Moon Knight and Iron Man user. I'd say he could ruin Doctor Strange, but Aaron took care of that already.

What kind of argument is that?

We're done here.

Okay, real question.

What would he doe to this bastich? I want your opinions, because I cant/wont think about that evil thing, that would come out.

He's a major player behind the recent trend of doing away with marvel's most famous, popular heroes and replacing them with more diverse knockoffs. He acts like he's a big defender of the downtrodden and speaker for the oppressed, but the truth is, he's doing it for money. If Marvel keeps using the characters he's created, he gets royalties.

He's also just terrible at what he does. His dialogue is infamously bad, his writing directions force otherwise good artists to do closeup after closeup so that the issue looks boring, and he doesn't seem to grasp that different people have to be written in different voices. Almost nothing happens in his issues; he drags things on and on, and then one minor thing happens at the end that really didn't have to be a cliffhanger. He's influential at Marvel, and poisons the entire line. He is in no small part responsible for Marvel's state of nonstop events, personally writing CW2, and has managed to force the company as a whole to adopt his decompressed writing style.

The already tried to ruin Lobo and it wouldn't take.
>On a related note where is the Main Mans "Bite me Fanboy" half shirt?

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He’s the lead marvel SJW, and the editors can’t reign him in. He made Iceman gay, he benched Tony Stark and turned Iron Man into a 15 year old black girl, they brought his alt universe black/Hispanic Spider-Man to maim continuity and tried to sideline Peter Parker, but fans weren’t reading black Spider-Man so they brought Peter back and now there are to Spider-men. Any character he writes will get sidelined and replaced with a minority or woman.

Someone already did what he would do, except Bendis would make him extra gay

Did you just assume my gender?

This is not Lobo. I am talking of the real bastich. I fucking hate Bunn for this little dibshit, but we can atleast say, that this is not the original bastich.


Imagine Lobo and Jonas sitting in Al's Diner. How would bendis speech sound like?

You asked what Bendis would do, I told you...

Also, what are you 12 refering to Lobo as the “bastich”?

>Also, what are you 12 refering to Lobo as the “bastich”?
Whats the Problem?

Probably replace them with a black teen

>Bendis on Spiderman

At least Peter will be put on rest
>Bendis on PK, MMMM and other Italian comics FUCK YOU, DON'T EVEN TRY. DO.NOT.EVEN.

>Bendis takes over Ms. Marvel
Kamala is replaced by Becky and everyone tells Becky how brave she is and how she's doing such wonderful work. Becky kicks a puppy and is given a Nobel Peace Prize for it.

Nah, he wouldn’t touch Kamala since she’s already a Muslim girl, except maybe to make her gay, but he wouldn’t do that because it would piss off her Muslim fans and SJWs turn a blind eye homophobia and my misogyny in the Muslim community.

You are probably a Battlestar fan that uses “frak” in regular conversation and on message boards.

Don't forget that if a character doesn't belong in a close proximity of his circle of favorites, they are prone to being considered "lame" and will be ridiculed by everyone in the book.

Or that he has a weird inability to grasp science fiction concepts, so he ends up bungling them in his writing.

Or his inability to write even a decent villain that isn't his spirit animal, Kingpin.

Or the fact that he can barely end a story without a built-in Deus ex machina, having the hero just punch until they win, or just having an entire battle happen off panel.

>Link is now black and bald
>Ganon is an evil businessman
>Link is given the Triforce of Courage by an older father figure who dies
>Link talks now, a lot
>when you stop for a moment his companion du jour has a meandering conversation with him about unimportant shit
>sometimes this just happens in the middle of combat
>often it's the same fucking conversation but slightly different
>you have to get through dialogue trees of similar writing to purchase anything or interact with any NPCs
>all male characters speak the same way, all female characters speak the same way - like 18-25 year-olds from Los Angeles
>Ganon wants to oppress Hylians and put them in ghettos or something
>three sex scenes minimum between Link and Zelda, complete with close-ups of his huge black dick tunneling into her puckered ass
>tons of plot threads lying around that lead to dead ends or nowhere at all
>one of the side characters is a bald white fat guy with a heart of gold
>there's an entire quest line about him becoming a hero and dating a brown haired Hylian girl with ghost powers
>side quests with literally no resolutions, sometimes no quest, just the ping for one or the journal update

The masochist in me really wants to see his and Jim Lee’s Legion of Superheroes

Bendis? Like the writer?

You couldn’t figure that out?

What about him?

Holy shit, are you a sperg? Read the thead like a normal person.

Maybe I fragging am, but no. Battlestar galactica sucks, like pretty much every scifi-shit.

I guess Daredevil is my favorite and he did a decent enough job. He's not Miller or Nocenti but his run is recommended reading.

Which thread? This thread? What do I need to read this thread for?

How many pages of the run were people sitting around talking or exposition?

Don't forget that if he gets put on a book that doesn't interest him, he'll put as much work as possible into destroying it and fucking with any canon he can get his hands one. See: Moon Knight and GotG

Not to say that he doesn't already destroy books that he DOES care about, but at least there you can see that he thinks its good. With the other stuff, it just feels fucking malicious.

>Bendis on Superman Rebirth

well he would break up the happy family dynamic, because whites aren't allowed to be happy or have kids

the anger i feel cannot be matched

You guys act like his only two crimes are making shallow legacy characters and making characters gay

Realistically, he'd write Kamala as a vapid teen that spouts migraine-inducing generic teen dialogue and memes ("Can you even?" "Mic drop"). Occasionally, she will take the form of Bendis' mouthpiece whenever he feels he needs to make a #woke observation of how minorities are treated in America.

Mystique would be her main villan for the duration of his run because she has a tangential connection to Kamala through Carol, and she's an X-men character Bendis grew up with. He'd probably have her try to set up a mutants crime syndicate in Jersey, and Target Kamala because she's Inhuman. Her story with Kamala would go on with little to no substantial development until the last issue where Kamala beats her by punching her in the face really really hard.

Armadillo would show up periodically to get beaten up and remind you that he's a loser.

There would be a love triangle between Miles and a random Inhuman that keeps getting teased, but never goes anywhere.

Several potentially interesting plot threads would be introduced, and quickly forgotten.

And then there would probably be an arc about someone in Kamala's family being deported.

Why would he make a new character when he can ride off the success of a relatively new one with a "definitive" run?

It's like you anons don't even know how the guy works.

I...
I don't even know what to say. What editor would approve this? What sane person would look at this and go: "Yes, this was a page well worth the ink."

Man I've actually kinda like the recent Ice Man series and wouldn't mind if they just fucking retconned that conversation
>"Yeah I just figured it out on my own. Jean keeps lying and bragging about invading my mind and forcing me out, though. It's kinda creepy."

i bet Dobson would love this

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Can't for wait for #188. Don't they have the guy who did Necronomicon doing the art?

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Yeah, Jacen Burrows. Did Neonomicon and Providence. I actually just came off Providence and absolutely loved him on it. I'm super excited to see his work on MK.

You mean Alan Moore :^)

Burrows was the artist you pleb

The most common complaints about Bendis are: he's bad at dialogue, ignores continuity, creates new characters for the royalty money. This kind of also goes under bad at dialogue, but he also drags out panels to pad the length of his books.

They're making fun of how Bendis writes.

Make Red Sonja black. Put clothes on her. Shrink her tits. Give her a big afro.

That and he’s the most white guilt ridden SJW of all comicdom.

>Green Arrow
Man. I just don't know. He'd probably be worse than J. T. Krul's New 52 stuff.

Green Arrow is already established as a liberal, but he’s still way too white for Bendis. He’d get sidelined for a minority.

Series that Marvel won’t cancel any time soon, no matter how shitty they perform.

Was supposed to be a new thread, I fucked up because autism

This is probably the most accurate post in this thread.

How Bendis ruins stories:

jinxworld.com/wordpress/?page_id=32

>Iron Fist
He would probably make it a stealth Luke Cage book.
Misty Knight would be wrested from the hands of Falcon though, which is a possible plus.

>Judge Dredd
>"It's time for Dredd to retire, for real this time!"
>his replacement is another clone, but a black teenage girl called Dredda
>doesn't even have the chin
>Dredda never went to judge academy, she never trained and is just naturally amazing
>Dredd shows up from time to time to tell the reader how Dredda is better than him in every way
>Dredda and Hershey have no conflict and agree on everything
>she never makes a tough moral choice, the world alligns and events happen so she never has to