>"A smashed pensieve, two broken broomsticks and the entire library in disarray. This is exactly the kind of thing the Ministry is no longer prepared to tolerate. I'm relocating you to Potions, Potter. Malfoy will take the case from here."
>"Malfoy?! But he's an asshole!"
"A smashed pensieve, two broken broomsticks and the entire library in disarray...
Eli Carter
Other urls found in this thread:
youtube.com
youtube.com
youtu.be
twitter.com
Angel Taylor
dearest me, i suspect... MAGIC IS AFOOT
Logan Phillips
however
Christopher James
And your OTHER dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises. Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.
Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody, just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.
>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."
I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.
Zachary Adams
Daring Synthesis!
1/10 are you even trying anymore?
Cooper Martinez
Horrible opening, someone make a better one quickly.
Parker Flores
>my arm’s screwed... you’ll have to cast the spell for me
>but professor! I never graduated hogwarts!
>heh, neither did I
Blake Fisher
Dehewer deh dehes dehn't deh deh deh dehest dehs deh dehe dehy deh dehie dehs. Deh deh dehing deh deh dehard deh deh dehs deh Dehwarts Dehdemy deh dehey deh dehed dehs deh deh indehable deh deh dehs. Deh deh deh dehy dehery, deh dehs’ deh dehency deh deh dehs deh deh dehment deh indehive deh deh dehial dehs, deh deh deh dehic undehical, deh deh dehtion deh indeh.
Dehs deh deh deh deh deh Dehling dehed deh deh deh Dehlberg dehing deh dehs; deh deh deh deh dehs deh deher deh dehen deh deh deh deh deh deh deht dehthing deh dehbody, deh dehusly dehable deh-dehtion deh deh dehs. Deh Dehry Dehher dehs deh deh anti-Dehtian (deh deh), deh deh’s dehly deh anti-Dehes Dehnd dehs deh dehs deh deh deh, dehty deh dehment. Deh deh dehs deh deh deh deh. Deh, dehfully, deh deh deher deh deh.
>d-deh dehst deh dehs deh deh dehough d-deh
"Deh!"
Deh dehing deh dehful; deh deh deh dehble. Deh deh deh, Deh dehed deh dehry deh deh deher deh deh deh deh, deh dehor deh dehtead deh deh deher "dehed deh dehs."
Deh deh dehing deh deh deh deh deh deh dehry deh deh deh deh dehed. Deh dehed deh deh Deh deh dehed deh deh dehal deh dehs. Deh deh dehlous. Dehling's deh dehs deh dehed deh dehes deh deh dehs deh deh deh deh deh deh deh dehing. Deh Deh deh deh dehish, dehing deh deh Dehry Dehher deh deh deh Dehphen Dehng. Deh deh dehthing deh deh dehect deh, "Deh dehse dehs deh dehing Dehry Dehher deh dehdeh deh dehdeh, deh deh deh deh deher deh deh deh deh deh deh Dehphen Dehng." Deh deh deh deh dehght. Deh deh deh dehing dehic. Deh deh deh "Dehry Dehher" deh deh, deh deh, dehed deh deh Dehphen Dehng.
Lincoln Gomez
based
Kayden Rogers
BASED
Brody Reyes
Based Dehposter
Bentley Martin
Based
Austin Nelson
>three brooms written off, five thestrals put down, two in intensive care, a troll let loose in Hogsmeade, four supposed death eaters in my cells, a Gringots vault busted and so many Goblins on my ass that I’m thinking of changing my name to Bilbo fucking Baggins. You got anything to add to this report, Potter?
>you read it all, Professor
>thought not. Well I have no choice. You’re promoted
Zachary Bell
>two in intensive care
Always gets me
Oliver Bell
>>thought not. Well I have no choice. You’re promoted
Meme genius like this comes only once in a generation. Please keep shitposting, no matter how much money or sex they offer you. Do not give up on your gift.
Levi Stewart
>"Deh!"
ok, i laughed this time. fuck dehposting though
Jayden Scott
It's been nearly a decade since this series of films finished. Why is Sup Forums so obsessed?
Jayden Russell
>You've been playing by your own rules too long Potter and the Ministry have decided you can't be trusted on your own anymore.
>You're taking me off the case?
>On the contrary, I'm giving you extra resources. Potter, meet Malfoy, the Ministry's latest hotshot rookie. He'll be keeping an eye on you from now on
Isaac Nguyen
>With all due respect sir.. fuck you
Nicholas Rivera
GRYFFINDOORRR HOUUSSSSE!!!
John Hall
Cameron Williams
You're a loose Hungarian horntail
But you're a bloody good wizard
Jacob Brown
deh good
Mason Jenkins
>DAMNIT, POTTER! NO MEANS NO! IF I SEE YOUR BROOM ANYWHERE NEAR THAT ZONE, I'LL THROW THE BOOK SO FAR UP YOUR ASS THE DEMENTORS WILL BE SUCKING OUT FUCKING CONFETTI! DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?!
>...Yes, professor
>GOOD. NOW GET THE FUCK OFF MY SCENE
>Ron, what are you doing? He said we're off the case
>He said he doesn't want to see your broom... That's why I brought the carpet
Luis Cox
Good thread
Jonathan Cruz
dammit potter, youve gone too far this time and those pencilnecks at the ministry have my balls in a vice. give me your badge and your wand and get out of hogsmeade for a while until this blows over. and stay the hell away from voldemort. i cant protect you any more
Caleb Bell
>wew lad
Nathaniel Sanchez
>Severus....please... I'm only three days from retirement
Aiden Ward
You're a loose cannon, Potter, but dammit you're the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises. Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.
Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody, just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.
>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."
I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.
Hudson Martin
*Dehring synthesis
Cooper Taylor
Solid intro.
Camden Brown
Es bleiben im Raum: Snape, Potter, Filch und Granger
Nathaniel Mitchell
Sadly majority of Sup Forums user grew up with these movies.
Isaiah Rodriguez
WATCH IT
Samuel Baker
*writes with her period blood on the wall*
>i grew up with 6 brothers
Owen Stewart
>Famous Harry Potter, can't even go on a crime scene without making the front page
Luis Edwards
Why did you replace Atlas Shrugged? It was the best part of the bait
Dylan Morales
Fuck the others, I thought it was a decent attempt.
Christian Kelly
delete it and re-do the opening
Aaron Bailey
Dehlete it more like lmao
Connor Hughes
>so many Goblins on my ass that I’m thinking of changing my name to Bilbo fucking Baggins
Charles Thomas
>Slytherin just churns out underhanded, sadistic, and outright evil people
Why did NO-ONE in the books ever wonder about this?
Caleb Fisher
doesn't ron say something about slytherin being evil in his first scene
Julian Edwards
It was a different time.
Nathaniel Myers
Somebody explain Deh-posting to me. I don't want to go to one of those meme catalog sites.
Xavier Carter
You know no matter how much people complain about Sup Forums being shit/fucking up there lives i think its nice and i laugh every now and then.
Landon Perry
Deh!
Adam Parker
>Damn it Sprout I need 10mg of wolfsbanazipan now or we're gonna lose him
>Longbottom I've got an invertebrate Potter, petrified mudblood who is allergic to potions and to top it off Malfoy is bleeding out like a punctured water bed and turning my ward into a fucking abattoir, this isn't the time to stand there shaking like a weeping willow!
Brandon Phillips
Aaron Scott
Honestly, wearing Slytherin colours would be like wearing a yellow star of David on your chest in the real world.
Alexander Cox
>....and your *other* wand
James Reyes
in the fifth film when voldemort is possessing harry at the ministry and harry is hallucinating shit, there's a brief 0.5 second clip of voldemort in front of a greenscreen background saying "Deh!"
youtube.com
also CCRRRROOOOOOSIO
Jaxson Sanchez
GINNY WILL YOU PLEASE SHUT THE DOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRR
Ryder Roberts
Joseph Mitchell
Shit
Kino
Juan Perry
>The flux capicator is fried, the curse cataclysmer is burnt and I don't even know what's wrong with the wingardium reducer! I'll need 2 days to fix the thing.
>You have 4 hours
Brandon Hill
YOUR BROOMSTICK AND YOUR BADGE.
Josiah Torres
>those book titles
How much effort did you go into?
Juan Richardson
and your other badge
Colton Powell
>.....and your other door
Hunter Jenkins
More like wearing a swastika armband
Jace Rogers
Eh? But Slytherin are evil sneaky bastards trying to control the world.
John Gutierrez
>Es bleiben im Raum: Krum, Potter, Delacour, und Diggory
James Ortiz
OOOOOOOOO
Luis Wood
Absolutely based based posters
Sebastian Turner
Andrew Stewart
>And your other wand
Matthew Rivera
He's a big guy
John James
youtube.com
That's how it starts: the fever, the rage. The feeling of ... powerlessness, that turns good men ... cruel.
Lincoln Barnes
AN' A THUMPEN GOODUN
Samuel Stewart
Gabriel Murphy
Leo Perez
probably too much
Caleb Rivera
Brayden Cruz
>While I'm alive I swear on the body of my sister I won't let those little Slytherin cunts get their hands on this cup, I'll burn this castle down before those shits triumph, so help me God.
>50 thousands points to Gryffindor!
How did Rowling get this past the censors?
Cameron Parker
As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be a Death Eater. To me, being a Death Eater was better than being Great Britain's Minister of Magic. Even before I first wandered into Knockturn Alley for an after-school job, I knew I wanted to be a part of them. It was there that I knew that I belonged. To me, it meant being somebody at a school that was full of nobodies. They weren't like anybody else. I mean, they did whatever they wanted. They tortured muggles in broad daylight and nobody ever gave them a ticket. In the summer when they were busy infriltating the Ministry, nobody ever called the aurors.
Bentley Edwards
give me more Hitler memes
Brandon Lee
Joshua Gutierrez
That's what I call dehdecation.
Jonathan James
>slytherin is bad business Arry, I tell ya. The only people who get sorted in there are the children of scheming kikes and shit. Fucking jews think they are superior to us or some shit
Jesus christ Raimi this was a kid's movie
Carson Robinson
>I believe in Magical Britain. Magical Britain has made my fortune. And I raised my daughter in the Magical British fashion. I gave her freedom, but I taught her never to dishonor her blood. She found a boyfriend, not a pureblood. She went to quiditch matches with him. She stayed out late. I didn't protest. Two months ago he took her for a broomstick ride, with another mudblood. They made her drink butterbeer and then they tried to take advantage of her. She resisted. She kept her honor. So they crucio'd her. Like a muggle. When I went to the hospital her mind was broken. Her spirit was shattered, held together by potions. She couldn't even weep because of the pain. But I wept. Why did I weep? She was the light of my life. A beautiful girl. Now she will never be fully sane again.I went to the aurors, like a good British Wizard. These two mudblood boys were brought to trial. The judge sentenced them to three years in Azkaban, and suspended the sentence. Suspended sentence! They went free that very day! I stood in the courtroom like a fool, and those two mudbloods, they smiled at me. Then I said to my wife, "For justice, we must go to Lord Voldemort."
Hudson Barnes
dehed
Caleb Garcia
samefag
Adam Walker
My name is not important... What is important is what I'm going to do. I just fucking hate this school and the mud-blood worms feasting on it's carcass. My whole life is just cold, bitter hatred... and I always wanted to die violently. This the time of vengeance and no life is worth saving. And I will put in the grave as many as I can. It's time for me to kill... and it's time for me to die.
Jackson Brown
yeah, that's how the joke works
Jayden Lee
holy kek
Anthony Phillips
Ian Bennett
NRRRRRRRRRAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Christopher Gomez
NYYYEEEAHHHHH
Adrian Lopez
The magical gene pool is muddy, and I'm the minister of Tergeo.
Kevin Nelson
>Why did you go to the aurors? Why didn't you come to me first?
Parker Jones
It's a Death Eater message. It means Albus Dumbledore sleeps with the fishes.
Angel Russell
HOLY FUCK
Daniel Thomas
>Malfoy is one of the most respected Wizards in Great Britain, Potter. And yet you freed his house-elf, cursed three of his bodyguards, and drove a racing broom through his front door?
>But, Professor, I have proof that he is leading undercover Death Eaters!
>I don't want to hear it, Potter! You're expelled!
>[Potter pushes the Dumbledore out his office window, who falls into the courtyard]
>Dat makes two of us.
Hunter Cook
Why didn't Potter go to Azkaban for using crucio on Helena Bonham Carter
Parker Anderson
Because only McGonagall was there to see it and she didn't care to press charges?
Eli Reed
Cos the Ministry was controlled by Voldey, and they're evil and don't care who uses what anymore unless it's leading them to pottah
Jacob White
It was among the aurors. It was some real greaseball shit.
Blake Butler
>It was revenge for Peter Pettigrew, and a lot of other things. And there was nothing that we could do about it. Bellatrix was a Death Eater and Sirius wasn't. And we had to sit still and take it. It was among the cousins. It was real Lestrange shit. They even pushed Sirius through the veil so his godson couldn't give him an open coffin at the funeral.
Xavier Edwards
>Dumblematic Immunity!
>It's just been revoked