300 human kills

>300 human kills
>btfos hipposhits
>kills for the sport, not the food
>effectively bulletproof
>survived a fucking rocket launcher hit
>the size of a crocodile twice his age
>worshipped by his prey as a literal god
>already had a shit movie adaption
when will the biggest chad of the animal kingdom get the kino he deserves?

Attached: Crocodile-gustave.jpg (550x297, 29K)

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=eu1by5-BpTA
youtube.com/watch?v=6Hnv_YzJQYU
youtube.com/watch?v=NhrQZoO2fYo
youtube.com/watch?v=OMXnhiv3NqY
ourplnt.com/worlds-5-largest-crocodiles-ever-recorded/
youtube.com/watch?v=TXvUKSJvk_g
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

>effectively bulletproof
is this what noguns believe?

He's literally so big and bulky and his skin so tough that bullets have little effect on him.

Crocodiles are insane. Did you know they don't die of old age? Their cells don't decay like ours

What about .50 BMG

>can shoot through an inch of steel
>but not aligator skin
if there is a problem its either from shooting at him while hes submerged, or they arent using a rifle cartridge on him, not that he has superman skin

>survived a fucking rocket launcher hit
really

thanks for the cringe
noguns are pretty uneducated

LOL A NUKE IS A BULLET AMIRYTE???/////

So then put 50 bullets into him and see what happens.

He hasn't been sighted for a while tho

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W-what do they die from then?

They don't.

Wtf is in his mouth?

predation

Me

Starvation. A crocodile grows until it can no longer sustain its body size, then it dies. Their only limit on life is how much food they can get, and they never stop growing. The only reason you don’t see 500 foot crocodiles is because they could never find enough food to live that long.

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Why does nature allow such monsters to live?

How come science hasn't found a way to use this to our advantage?

>Wtf is in his mouth?
A zebra, obviously

A zebra

Faggot

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Real or fake?

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Why don't we just put one in a cage and repeatedly feed it until we have a mega crocodile then

No. They keep growing and suddenly an organ stops working right, usually the heart

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ultimate animal chad, fuck me

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They're trying all the time but it's hard

Are you saying crocodiles die from a broken heart

Their hearts are too big :3

:(

You have it wrong user. At this point it's the crocodile that allows nature to live

They were here before us. They will be here after us. We think we're the pinnacle of evolution, above nature somehow, but we're not even close

youtube.com/watch?v=eu1by5-BpTA

Crocfags can't recover from this.

>caiman
lets see that toxoshit try that on a real croc

would take more than a hundred years, they have an incredibly slow metabolism like whales

I find it hard to believe.

>They were here before us. They will be here after us. We think we're the pinnacle of evolution, above nature somehow, but we're not even close
We could literally exterminate 99% of their species tomorrow if we felt like it. They only live because we permit it.

>we think we're the pinnacle of evolution, above nature somehow, but we're not even close
YEAHHHH PICKLE RIIIIIICK WUBALUBBADUBDUB AMIRITE XDDD?!!?

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Crocodiles are my favorite animals and definitely the most efficient predators in the world, but they can't fuck hippos up, nothing can, not even lions and some lions will kill crocodiles.
I mean, unless there's an actual account of Gustave killing a hippo.

>youtube.com/watch?v=6Hnv_YzJQYU
>tfw no chill as fuck midget alligator bro

Don't you love these stupid hippies that spout shit like "man we're still a part of nature man like the world and shit energy vibrations" they really should be exterminated.

HISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

what's that, you got scared for a moment there? Yeah, let that sink in

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youtube.com/watch?v=NhrQZoO2fYo

We're still a part of nature, tho. Do you even thermodynamics?

*blocks your path*

youtube.com/watch?v=OMXnhiv3NqY

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this is some supreme bullshit

see

Putting them in captivity fucks with their growth and health, happens to a lot of species

They are right. Factories are also part of nature. Nuclear reactors are part of nature.

>guy dies from heart attack
He is old. It's natural. Man naturally does when he gets old.
>croc dies from heart attack
HURRDURR CROCS DONT AGE THEY ARE GODS!!

I don't know where you are taking this to
>old man sits all day and does nothing
He is old it's natural that old man does nothing
>old croc sits all day does nothing
!!!

Real photograph, though probably a case of forced perspective.
Crocs did use to grow bigger in the past, humanity taking a big chunk of their potential food and hunting for their leather doesn't allow them to grow as big as they used to.
I have no doubt that there were 7+ meter monsters swimming around a couple hundred years ago, though anything above 8 is probably out of the question.
You want the real big monster like that pic you gotta go a couple million years back to the likes of purrusaurus, sarcosuchus, ramphosuchus, or deinosuchus.

No, just because we can effect nature doesn't make us a part of it. Nature is our bitch go fuck yourself hippie.

nuke the hippies

You live on Earth. You're part of it, sorry

>In captivity, some individuals are claimed to have lived for over a century

>Crocodiles have the most acidic stomach of any vertebrate. They can easily digest bones, hooves and horns.

>Unlike other reptiles, a crocodile has a cerebral cortex and a four-chambered heart.

>The jaws can bite down with immense force, by far the strongest bite of any animal. The force of a large crocodile's bite is more than 5,000 lbf (22,000 N), which was measured in a 5.5 m (18 ft) Nile crocodile, on the field,[54] compared to just 335 lbf (1,490 N) for a Rottweiler, 670 lbf (3,000 N) for a great white shark, 800 lbf (3,600 N) for a hyena, or 2,200 lbf (9,800 N) for an American alligator.

>Crocodiles can move quickly over short distances, even out of water. The land speed record for a crocodile is 17 km/h (11 mph)

>Four species of freshwater crocodile climb trees to bask in areas lacking a shoreline

>In captivity, some individuals are claimed to have lived for over a century

Literal monsters.

>even hippos respect gustchad

We do need to handle global warming though.

>you live on earth so you're on the same level as a rat that also lives on earth even though your species could wipe out all of the rats if it wanted to
Huh, brain thingy hurt when you try to use logic?

>cerebral cortex
SMART LIZARD

Point still stands, even Gustav was too beta to take on the Chadopotamus

Crocs are closer in relation to birds than they are to lizards.

Again, laws of thermodynamics.

>cerebral cortex

They have achieved consciousness

you guys ever see that video of the croc trying to open a door?

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Why are ambush predators so successful? Crocs and sharks are older than dinosaurs and they're still around to this day.

lmao your argument falls apart because of your weak human perception

you don't see all of time at once so you don't realize that there's an entire web of life connected by generational cells and shit. we're part of nature because nature is a vague enough concept that what we actually are is a part of nature

>find gay herbivore in a vulnerable spot
>bum rush that faggot and kill him
>easy meal pretty much every time

Maybe because they save a lot of energy by ambushing instead of chasing prey

they're irl campers. they get just enough kills to live for long enough

when you ambush your prey they never learn to adapt because they fucking die in an ambush. You waste no time fucking around, you only sleep, mate, eat or ambush niggas

>it's another "some high as shit faggot tries to start a philosophical argument" episode

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>too stupid to understand the complexity of systems on Earth
>lol u high nigga

>humans could wipe out all rats if they wanted
i dont know how you came to that conclussion, but i dont think its a true statement. rats are pretty damn hardy animals

abso-fuckin-lutely it is

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20 feet long... That thing would tear you to shreds...

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FMJ goes right through them. The problem is bullets break up on impact with water like a golden gate jumper.

How are we not part of nature? Tell me one unnatural thing about us. Everything we have ever done has come from nature, everyone we have ever eaten. Your computer came from nature, your clothes, your house, your electricity. There's no such thing as "unnatural"

>The most deaths in a single crocodile attack incident may have occurred during the Battle of Ramree Island, on February 19, 1945, in what is now Burma. Nine hundred soldiers of an Imperial Japanese Army unit, in an attempt to retreat from the Royal Navy and rejoin a larger battalion of the Japanese infantry, crossed through ten miles of mangrove swamps that contained saltwater crocodiles. Twenty Japanese soldiers were captured alive by the British, and almost five hundred are known to have escaped Ramree. Many of the remainder may have been eaten by the crocodiles, although since this incident took place during an active military conflict, it is impossible to know how many deaths can be directly attributed to the crocodiles instead of combat-related causes.

>"That night [of the 19 February 1945] was the most horrible that any member of the M. L. [motor launch] crews ever experienced. The scattered rifle shots in the pitch black swamp punctured by the screams of wounded men crushed in the jaws of huge reptiles, and the blurred worrying sound of spinning crocodiles made a cacophony of hell that has rarely been duplicated on earth. At dawn the vultures arrived to clean up what the crocodiles had left.... Of about one thousand Japanese soldiers that entered the swamps of Ramree, only about twenty were found alive."

forgot article
ourplnt.com/worlds-5-largest-crocodiles-ever-recorded/

That's because he's confusing crocodiles with amoebas.

>AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH SAVE ME GUSTAVE

pic related is the only genuine kino croc movie.

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why do they kill them like giant faggots?

>In this moment, I am euphoric. Not because of any phony crocodile's blessing. But because, I can exterminate 99% of their species with my intelligence.

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That's Lolong, he wasn't killed but died in captivity

Thank you, Mr. Rogan.

Looks like they are just moving him or some shit. Notice he muzzle and blind fold

Serves 'em right for swimming through croc territory.

>really long
>named lulong

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>There is no corroboration of the event by contemporary British military reports or by interviewed Japanese soldiers and local Burmese. Wright's account is the only known source for the mass crocodile attack and his figures have been disputed by other historians, who call the event an urban myth.
>Most of all, there is a single zoological problem. If 'thousands of crocodiles' were involved in the massacre, as in the urban (jungle) myth, how had these ravening monsters survived before and how were they to survive later? The ecosystem of a mangrove swamp, with an exiguous mammal life, simply would not have permitted the existence of so many saurians before the coming of the Japanese (animals are not exempt from the laws of overpopulation and starvation).

You're telling me. That if all of us got together and we're dead set on killing every single rat on the planet, that it wouldn't be possible? Are you joking?

I didn't say unnatural. However, just because we take things from nature that doesn't make us a part of it. Nature is just another machine working for us at this point.

youtube.com/watch?v=TXvUKSJvk_g

SHHHHHUSH I left that bit out for dramatic reasons

Woah! A .50 BMG? Heh, I doubt it...
^This guy knows his stuff!

lol'd

>not that he has superhuman skin
But he's does he's a crocodile

Daily reminder Hippos are the most dangerous animal in terms of people killed per year, and they're 100% herbivores.

Name an animal more alpha. Also croc-shits BTFO

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I would fuck her

I really want to see a Virgin Croc vs Chadopotamus edit now

Hippos are the shittiest animal in the world. They literally poop all the time and use their little fat gross tails as a fan to fling as much shit as possible to every surrounding. Because the smelliest they get the more pheromones will be released, so they are always shitting and pissing themselves.