Why should I keep the faith?
I've tried to live righteously, I've been shit on most my life and thought, I'll be happy when I'm older, I'll have a good job, I'll have a dog, I'll have a woman, I'll be fit, I'll have friends.
I've been praying everyday for a simple 8-5 deskjob that pays $15 so I can move out, afford a dog, cable, food, phone, medical, and not live in a slum. So I can finally start my life.
I've been working retail for 3 years now, my feet can't take it, I'm fucking fat now because I can walk it off after work like I did before, my hours are shit, I hate customers I can't grin and bear it no more.
And despite accepting the Lord at a young age, despite reading the entire Bible, despite being baptized life has not got better, despite going to church, despite confessing the faith when the opportunity is before me like when people say Jesus is dead or the like, despite last year my family dog and my last grandparent dying in the same week last year, I just said the Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away, it just keeps getting worse and worse.
And just today I lost my credit card and a group of "friends" I pray for everyday rejected me for good.
So I have an ultimatum. Either he delivers me the job I've been praying for by Monday, or Trump wins the election AND I get the job I want Tuesday.
If not I'm done. I've never seen a real miracle, I've never heard his voice. I've never had a vision. I've never had an angel come down to talk.
Nothing
He said ask and you shall received.
Nothing.
He said blessed are those who have not seen but believe.
When people back then could see him. People could grab his robe and be healed.
I think between 15 years of faith deserves a miracle, a voice, an intervention, some proof.
If not? Who cares? Why fear Hell with no proof? Why work for Heaven with no proof?