ITT: We write joss whedon's "Batgirl" script

>"I like being all batty, bating around like a bat at night"
>"Quick robin! to the bat-car thingy"
>"Being barefoot all the time is empowering"
>Barbara is faster, smarter and stronger than bruce

Then Joss tries to fuck the actress playing Batgirl while Joss' s wife sits at home, crying.

I'd rather see what it looks like on Bendis

Am fine if he's writing and directing Babs OR Stephanie. Just not Cass Cain, pls.

There's this sensitive, nerdy guy in one of her classes in college that she falls in love with.

Ross Eden

More like he forces her to watch so he can force both the ex-wife and the actress to be stronger women under his twisted logic.

>cries loudly in a bathroom, naked and in fetal position, because of a boy

Main villain constantly spouts dumb unfunny lines taking away all the tension and when he starts getting even remotely menacing, he gets beaten in a "funny" way.

Whedon made JL better. Stay mad Snyder fag. His batvirl will be way better than anything Snyder ever made.

Why does Sup Forums hate Wheadon so much? I like his writing.

because you have shit taste

>Whedon made JL better.
Possibly, but he didn't make it good.

>Whedon made JL better

it was so fucking jarring all the subtle drama going when the movie started to cut to a news segment with an old lady yelling

''aliens took my husband and are going to put something in his BLEEEEEP, so I say BLEEEEEP those BLEEEEEEEEEEEP **censored cursing continues**

Because his style is very noticeable and quite stilted. When everyone is the funny quipster things get boring and when a villain can't stop hamming it up the audience loses perspective.

>someone gets raped and killed but it's cool because it's not Barbara.

We can only hope that Whedon spends two hours covering this iconic Batgirl story.

Barbara would just be Buffy/Kitty Pride but with a bat costume on.

How do you misgender Alyssa? She would have had to tell you she was a tranny because otherwise no one would fucking know. She's not realistically drawn like one.

He's a lousy writer and a lousy human being who made it to the top by "reinventing" drama with "let's make sarcastic jokes about the situation" ad nauseam, and is guilty of being the most uninspired, derivative hack in all of Hollywood.

Its so much worse than that.

Complaining about being misgendered from a fertility doctor. You know, the person whose job is solely focused on the biological reproductive organs and their carved-in-stone functionality, not genderfluid nonsense. You can call it a girl's penis or a guy's womb all you want, but to create a baby there is one and exactly one formula - XY sperm meeting XX egg. To a fertility doctor you are one or the other, and when discussing fertility options to get bent out of shape of the doctor referring to your biological reality is beyond insane.

I've tried to find the panel after this, when this person is reduced to despair and tears over a *pronoun", who then goes on about how strong they are. Dumbass, you're sobbing in your drink over a word, you couldn't be more weak.

And then there's his fanbase who believes he's the cleverest writer ever.
Shit, people were making fun of how formulaic and predictable majority of mainstream American horror is (slasher genre in particular) before he even got a job, for instance, yet everyone treats him like a genius for making slight twists (which was just as predictable as cliches he's mocking) and making fun of those cliches.

I have a transgender friend who cringes at the whole "HE MISGENDERED ME A BLOO BLOO BLOO" thing because, and I quote, "people are going to make mistakes, its annoying but it happens and turning into a whiny little bitch about it just makes you look like an attention whore".

Man, I wanted the scientists to win in Cabin in the Woods so fucking badly, if only because they were far more charming and believable than the retardedly hyper-aware stoner.

Is Whedon actually Hunter Zolomon?

SHE IS BAREFOOT.

>That's my sometimes-friend Catwoman. She was a villain but now she's good. She's like "The Vegeta" of the Bat Family.

>"Being barefoot all the time is empowering"
You can't prove it isn't...

>Jason whines "I thought I was the Vegeta!"
>Oh and that's Jason. He's like the Veronica to Dick's Betty.

This, whedon is a hack

>if batgirl was directed by tarantino

Buffy's romances were all sexy masculine chads, though?

You know the movie's not even going to mention Cass or Steph at all, right? They'll be scrubbed from existence and Babs will be the greatest and only Batgirl to ever live.

true but those she actually fell in love with (Angel, Spike) were both much older than her, and incredibly dangerous and manipulative.

Joss has a fantasy of young girl x older monster/killer

I see the Barbara/Bruce romance is on track, then

...

They're ashamed of having loved Avengers 1 and 2.

>"I like being all batty, bating around like a bat at night"

I LOVE the H.R. Geiger's The Rocketeer line.

Forget it MCUcky, you're a Whedon fan; don't try to hide it.

Literally who gives it 10/10

I dunno, I mean Cass has enough in common with River Tam to make me think he can do a semi-competent job at it.

...

This is something that I think bears repeating.

>The Joker: "How's this for a joke?"
>shoots at Batgirl
>Batgirl: "That's not a joke."
>audience erupts into applause

Which means Avengers never was good...

Brain gender is biological too and a doctor should know that, but I stll don't understand why they make such a huge deal out of being 'misgendered'. Tearing up like this is mental illness, you can't expect anyone to cater to your anxiety, dysphoria and whatever else.

>Something's definitely bleeding

I should hope so! Last I checked, Babs wasn't a tranny.

I liked Firefly

i'm sorry

Jesus Christ. And people cry about Marvel being SJW propaganda.

It's just an encouragement to be obsessed over meaningless bullshit while self-appointed superiors lead them around by the nose.

>XY sperm meeting XX egg

Only zygotes (fertilized eggs) have two sex chromosomes. A sperm has either an X or a Y chromosome and goes into an egg, which always has a single X chromosome (if the cells are healthy). Doesn't detract from what you're saying at all, but I just wanted it to be known.

That's a pretty based friend right there.

Yeah that seems about right

>''aliens took my husband and are going to put something in his BLEEEEEP, so I say BLEEEEEP those BLEEEEEEEEEEEP **censored cursing continues**
Haven't seen Jl yet but that sounds more like snyder when he is being funny (like in dawn of the dead) than Whedon, whose humour is limited to putting "y" at the end of every word like a fucking retard and OMG SOOO NEEEERDY jokes

It might be the autism but I've always wanted Tarantino to make a movie about Flash's rogues gallery

>then there's damien. He's like scrappy-doo, only with way more punching

Oh please. All three Whedon has wrote.
> Cass = River Tam in Firefly
> Stephanie = Buffy in BtVS
> Babs = Wesley in Buffy/Angel

>And then there's his fanbase who believes he's the cleverest writer ever.
This, he's supposed to be "the god of dialogue" but that title clearly goes to Adam Reed of archer fame

Don't let the internet fool you, this is the stance of a majority of trans people. It's when someone intentionally starts giving them shit about it to get a reaction that they'll actually get vocal about it. Which happens a lot, really.

Nah, you gotta expand the reply a little, try a close up shot of Batgirl shouting from behind cover
>"That is not a joke! You are ACTUALLY shooting people!"

Ooh, ooh

Then it pauses for a beat and Batgirl shouts
>"That is NOT cool!"

Peak Whedonism

I would pick Guy Ritchie. It's a heist film. First part is a jailbreak to get the Rogues all together in order to even the score with a villain that's out of their league. Flash investigates, and ends up joining their quest in the end to keep them from committing murder while still pursuing justice, but they still make off with some loot in the end, leaving Flash in an awkward position.

>"Being barefoot all the time is empowering"

Isn't that Tarantino's thing?

hopefully it was the joker, by batman

Feminist = shit
poser feminist to get asspats = ungodly shit

I'm fine with some feminism if its done right and more about empowerment instead of tearing people down. Some of Wonder Woman's "woohoo girl power" comics are awesome.

> Joss "If you want to spread those batwings, spread those legs" Whedon.

>Villian cracks a lot of jokes and is generally kind of a not threathening emo boy

Other DC books may get a panel or two of retardation (like some mention of ''mansplaining'') but they're drawfed by the sheer amount of shit of this one.

Real life is not tumblr, if a black guy start to talk about white privilege to some random white guy in public the other blacks will think it's ridiculous.

You can't simply show your insecurities to other people like that, that's being weak.

Excuse me, where is the SJW propaganda in that page? I'm not seeing things like people going around screaming "LET'S OPEN A CONCENTRATION CAMP FOR EVERYONE WHO IS NOT A BLACK LESBIAN!"

I still don't get it.

>Marvel releases funny movie
>WAAAHHH I HATE QUIPS TONY STARK SHOULD BE A SUPER SERIOUS VIGILANTE
>DC releases serious movie
>WAAAHHH IT'S TOO SERIOUS I WANT BATMAN MAKING QUIPS ALL TIME

There's such a thing as a middle ground.

Is joss wedon a gril?

Meanwhile in Pakistan and India trannies are being burned alive. I bet marvel/DC won't ever do it on them to make it seem more "sensitive"