Writefag general

Share here your cartoon project, plots, wip, scripts, lines, animation, even art for your show...Anything as long as it's OC.

>In order to keep the thread lively I suggest you to comment on the work posted just above your own.

Other urls found in this thread:

pastebin.com/dMwSJ4zT
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Ninja story of 5 sisters seeking revenge against a demon who cursed them to be forever together, but forever apart. All 5 share one physical form and transform between the 5 sisters.

I spend my spare time designing a capeshit universe with no Super-Villains. Everyone with super-powers is a hero in their own eyes. The conflict comes from all of the heroes having their own idea's of what constitutes "Best for everyone"

Title: 10X

Meet the Xavier brother. They were born decuplets but they are more different that you may think. Follow up their hijinks in and out of school, as these ten identical twins mess around with the "oneys".

How to motivate myself to write more?

Also where have these threads been? Don't see them around much and they're not nearly as popular as they used to be.

Title: Magic Tricks
Plot:Three bumbling rival magicans try to get their kids to follow in their footsteps, but the kids refuse.
Characters: The three kids, named Mark, willy, and Emily, are typical kids. They're slightly nerdy, and I'm still trying to make them stand out. It has the typical 2 boys 1 girl trio. The magicians are over the top, bumbling, but not idiots, just overly arrogant. Mark's magician dad is married to his lovely assistant, who would probably be MILF waifu bait if this show was a thing. There's also the mayor's daughter, who actually wants to be a magician, but fails, and has a crush on Mark. She's bubbly, and doesn't let her wealth make her greedy, but she is also over-confident. Mark's family also has a pet rabbit, Willy has a divorced family and a slightly cynical little brother, and Emily's dad is a clown.
Humor: Whenever I've shown people any of my scripts, they tell me it's a hybrid of early Spongebob and Phineas and Ferb. It definitely has a joke focus, with some emotional moments thrown in for good measure.

I've spent years outlining my original fiction but the instant I try to put pen to paper I freeze up.

I don't have this problem when writing fanfiction so I don't understand what's happening

Defining the rules of your universe and having your audience understand them is a big deal.

When I was doing fanfiction I could introduce a lot of concepts and know with confidence that my audience would get it. Now I find myself locking up wondering whether I explained something too much or too little and if how I explained it would affect the quality of the story.

You have a villain strong enough to rip human beings apart like paper and has major anger issues and minimal self-control.
How do portray the consequences of such character's temper tantrums believably without straying too much into puerile edge territory? I'm not very good at dancing around gore.

The World is basically, very grounded and realistic. Human beings are only capable of so much, this isn't a fantasy world of dreams and wishes. This is reality. Cold, harsh, cruel reality. This is not a cartoon, this is not a video game, this is not a comic book, there are no superheroes in capes flying around to save the day. Those are impossible dreams that are never going to happen, so wake up.

This is the reality that everyone is forced to accept and live in. No ifs, ands, or buts about it. That's simply what is.

But it's an illusion. A program that everyone is unknowing dialed into. A false reality blocking out sight of the truth.

Nothing is impossible. You can do anything, you just have to believe. Magic, the Supernatural, Psionics, ghosts, monsters, angels, other dimensions, gods, all of it is real. But it's been lost, and hidden, for ages. It's been locked out of the World's consciousness and perception, as everyone is hardwired into the Matrix that governs everything.

And then, here's our main protagonist.
Dan Cruezer.

A boy that loves cartoons, comic books, video games, anime, manga, and all sorts of fictional media. He lives and breathes it, and fantasizes day in and day out about living a life of adventure and being a super hero, doing impossible things and saving the world.

He's very high energy, free-spirited, and upbeat, but everyone considers him to be "crazy" and "insane". But he's fully embraced that label of madness, playing up that unpredictable and chaotic nature as he dances to the beat of his own drum, acting almost out of touch with the reality that everybody else lives in.

(continued)
Dan is a kid acting like a Toon, in a world that's grounded in realism and restriction.
But, what happens when he ends up on a life-changing adventure, encountering the hidden mysteries behind the veil of the virtual reality the rest of the world perceives, through supernatural artifacts and entities?
What happens... when he stumbles upon secrets that may validate his very hopes and dreams? His belief that anything is possible, and his desires to be a like a cartoon and a superhero?
And what would this mean for the rest of the world...?

That sounds like something inherently gory, if the strength is specifically directed towards ripping people apart.

Dead Thread?

Dead thread.

Going to be graduating Uni next week, so I'm pretty excited to have more free time to write and read at my leisure.
My latest big idea that I've been brainstorming is a Joan of Arc alternate history where she isn't burned at the stake.
Basic setup for most of the plot is that France has invaded England and aren't doing well, Joan has been sidelined at the Court because her voices aren't helping them invade England (Heaven only sanctioned the removal of the English from France, not to pursue further aggressions), the members of court are plotting against her because of her influence over the king and people.
Eventually a disgraced English knight starts hearing instructions from demons (like how Joan has with the Saints) and starts kicking French ass. This new actor spurs the voices to intercede and rouses Joan into action to once again defend France.

I don't know much about French history, but that seems like it could be interesting, if pulled off well.

Here's my thing I'm doing:

an idea for a show starring an eccentric and spacey little girl with unkempt, ankle reaching orange hair, who wears a hospital gown and a pair of soft slippers. She gets committed to a gloomy old mental asylum with nights lasting longer than days and bizarre architecture. She adjusts pretty easily, but she adamantly insists that she's perfectly sane, though she does sometimes doubt her own sanity.

The show would try to take a relatively family-friendly look at things like mental illness, and have an overall macabre yet light-hearted tone.

How's that sound?

The interesting thing is that Joan is one of the most well-documented people from that time period, royal or otherwise, because of the prevalent court documents. There's a lot of information out there. I've only read Mark Twain's book about her so far, but I plan on getting others soon.
I've seen you post about this idea before, and I still like it. Seems like something good for a webcomic. Bunch of little short vignettes and such.

The thing I'm planning to pitch it as eventually would be a show, and I think 11 minute episodes would work best for it. I've written a few potential scripts already

Tell me about the rest of your cast.
A show built around only one insane loli cannot survive.

pastebin.com/dMwSJ4zT
I wrote this for my uni writing course
It's essentially the final 20 minutes of The Dark Knight, except extremely silly

I actually had thought about the rest of the cast.

Mostly, the other recurring cast members would be the other patients and the asylum staff. I've put a decent amount of detail into them, but some of the basics include a hippie who also has severe OCD, a ghost girl who's technically considered a patient because her spirit's confined to the asylum and she's not sure how to pass on, and an overweight British boy who's too embarrassed to say that he's in the asylum for treatment of an eating disorder.

Some of the staff include the head (and only) nurse, a girl around the protagonist's age hired on a whim because her grandmother retired recently and they couldn't find anybody else around remotely qualified, as well as the head guard an orderly, a hulking brute of a man with a spiked ball replacing his right hand. There's also the asylum's cook, who's probably the most unhinged person in the building, including the patients, and the head of the asylum, an elderly Russian doctor who's very adamant about what's sane behavior and what isn't, despite having several odd quirks of his own.

I remember this from a few threads ago! Neat idea, hope to see more of it soon.
I spent most of November trying to turn my vaguely-superhero-y story ideas into a novel, so that was fun. I didn't end up finishing sadly (about 15k words shy of the 50k goal, so that's something right?) but honestly, it was just nice to get my ideas on paper finally.

And at the very least I think I have all the world-building/lore/character stuff cemented down so hey, that's a plus!

A quick summary of the story is "government group called the Mutant Affairs Division (M.A.D.) protects the identities of mutant/super-powered folk around the world and aids them in learning to use their abilities to help people in secret; mutants start disappearing however, including the protagonist's family, leading her to travel across the country with her assistant trying to learn more about the being that's 'collecting' mutants and why they're doing it". A little boring but hey, I don't think its terrible for a YA novel.

I've got an idea/setting for a robot noir detective story, but I haven't seen a lot of noir stuff, what's the best of the best to get my feet wet?

Well, Dick Spanner's a noir cartoon starring a robot detective.

Does anyone have anything to say about this? Does it seem like a good premise for something?

I've been working on a cyberpunk/post-cyberpunk novel about a master criminal along the lines of Fantomas or Diabolik, the first three chapters are done and I'm going to start sending out copies to friends and family to see what they think.

What exactly is Cyberpunk? All I know about it is futuristic cities.

It sounds potentially decent

It has been a long time since the last thread.

>Title: Way back home (On rentre)
>Genre: Sci-fi/Adventure
>Plot: Two siblings abducted by aliens must try finding the way back to Earth, on their own accross the Milky Way, despite the dangers and the language barrier.

Pastebin (English)
>pastebin.com/p3vp7Hcv
Pitch Bible (French)
>docdroid.net/aWdaibc/prebible-internet.pdf

Getting a show started is more difficult than I thought. Fortunately I don't need to renew author rights until 2021. Until then I'll try maybe launching a kickstarter and continue to meet with producers.

Lately I have been busy searching for jobs and learning anatomy/color theory/shadow/composition in order to improve my drawing skills. So I didn't wrote enough new to translate yet.
If the project get on tv some day, it will be in a decade at least, but I keep confident.

This is a rough sketch.

>you can do anything, you just have to believe
I'm pretty sure I've heard a manga about this concept.
Your MC sounds very nerd-self-inserty. Not to say that that kind of character can't work, but you need to make it work.

It was one reason why I would call myself a Dead comrade

what makes this stand out from the rest?

Write a fanfic for your own unwritten story.

Actually, the character is based on one of my best friends. My own "self-insert" is the Main Character's best friend. The two of them are meant to have "Jay and Silent Bob" or "Phineas and Ferb" type of dynamic, but the focus is still primarily on the MC.

Dan's character is meant to be very hyperactive, energetic, loud, talkative, comedic, and very crazy and insane. Sort of like Deadpool and The Joker but super heroic and good, with the 4th wall breaking, physics defying, and reality altering nature of a 'Toon. He's also a lot like Sonic the Hedgehog, in the sense of being a very free-spirited and adventure-seeking type of guy who lives life by his own whim and just goes where the wind takes him, he just does whatever the heck he wants. Overall, he is a very chaotic character. He's so chaotic that if you were to ask him what his alignment is, he'll say Lawful Good.

>Jay and Silent Bob
>Phineas and Ferb
>Deadpool
>The Joker
>Sonic the Hedgehog

>What makes this stand out from the rest?
Sorry I don't understand your question. Can you be more precise?

What I mean is, the character is very silly, wacky, goofy, crazy, loud, talkative, impulsive, always on the move, free-spirited, thrill-seeking, energetic, adventurous, strong willed, strong spirited, unpredictable, and above all else, someone heroic that wants to do good, help others, save lives, and hates evil.

What I mean is that he's probably going to be an annoying, messy amalgamation of shitty pop-culture references and not nearly as clever as tiy think 4th wall meta writing.

The last general really gave me some ideas. All i did was change up some names and countries. Mainly Avatar Korra
Genre:Medieval/Fantasy
Plot: After centuries of bitter strife the seven powers dividing Anglia have fought each other into an uneasy truce. Or so it seems. In the West a new king has been crowned.
King Cyrus has made his ambitions clear: World Conquest through force of arms. He seeks to restart the great war, which once desolated the land.
Sensing the conflict to come the Balance Bringer Karen seeks to maintain status quo and preserve this fragile truce.
Yet the Tyrant King is not Karen's only enemy for all across the Seven Kingdoms, dangerous adversaries have assembled, all of them seeking insure their kingdom emerges the sole victor in the oncoming war.
Can Karen defeat The Tyrant King before his ambitions can be realized? Will the Tyrant King realize his dreams of World Peace and end the 500 year war?
Victory means a legacy of peace for a 1000 years, defeat means the death and extinction of ones entire clan. As there is one Sun in the sky, one Balancer, so can there be only one Emperor.
One King to rule them all.

I mentioned before that he's based on a real person, one of my closest friends. I just describe him like those characters because that's pretty much the way I do things, I see similarities, parallels, and connections between things. If I know someone who's similar to a fictional character, and I then made a character based on that person, I would draw inspiration from the character they are similar to.

The Old War: First Age
The Novans are a galaxy-spanning empire, who have as much power over the other space-fairing races because their method of harvesting raw-energy (the galaxy's main energy source, magical blue swirly shit) is the most efficient.
The twist: No species has developed modern warfare. They all use medieval/ancient methods of warfare and weapons mixed with space-age tech. There are no bombing runs since their flight-tech is like that of pre-WWI but because of raw-energy they can space. However, they have paratroopers and power-armor.
The Sar-Kuhn are a yet un-encountered empire who developed tech similarly to our own, without raw-energy. They used their planet's naturally rich deposits of iron and gasses to get their ships into space with just shit loads of blackpowder.
The Novans are a very raptor-esque race physiologically. Imagine velociraptors that stand up straight, not tails, smooth skin, flat faces, and hair and stuff. Their heels are raised and give the bent-backwards look, and their skulls are more oblong and their eyes are slanted. Their tactics are very Roman/Medieval European, massive pike hedges, shield walls, and siege machines that might as well be artillery. They are strong and solid, yet adaptable to most if not all terrain and environments of the many colonies. They are however not as quick to deploy, difficult to maintain, and not very mobile or flexible. Novans can't be scattered or separated or cut off, they require strength in numbers or solid formations.
The Sar-kuhn are reminiscent of the Mongols and Celts. They are fast, scattered, and individually strong. They are vicious and wear very little armor. They can deploy onto a planet in half the time of the Novans, and catch you off your guard if you're not quick enough to set up a defense. They are however terrible in large numbers or any pitched battle. Working together, if the numbers get too great, disputes among their own ranks can occur as different members

Smut mostly

well from what im reading he's gonna need alot of character development.
If this is cartoon show then he won't need much because everything resets to the status quo.
But if its a book than he comes off as rather annoying. a good half of those traits can be kinda intolerable. But if done right it can be really interesting you have a hard road ahead of you user i don't envy you.

>he's based on a real person
You say that like real people can't be cringy, annoying reference douchebags.

compete to vi for power (very tribal mindset). They also can't counter-attack effectively, since their tactics require "momentum" in one direction that can't be easily re-routed.
While the Novans will conquer your planet and force you to obey their rules under threat of force, they will never genocide your or take your resources. They don't have the type of government system that taxes anything either. They also don't try to get too involved in planetary politics of other races.
The Sar-Kuhn will never try to rule you, they'll mostly leave races alone. But if they want something, they're going to take it, either by negotiation or force.
When these two races first met, there was a fifty-year war which the Sar-Kuhn lost. However, after decade long reconstruction era, the Sar-kuhn come back with more advanced tech, better weapons, a larger army, more resources, and new genetically altered battle-beasts. How did they get all this?
The Cataclysm, a black cloud of some sort of dark matter that has existed since the dawn of the universe. Most believe that is the manifestation of nothingness. It is intelligent and seeks to consume all matter. Planets, stars, comets, anything.
Before the fifty-year war, the Novans had discovered and were the only ones with the military might to actually combat the Cataclysm. In their second encounter with, the entirety of the Novan naval might was sent to destroy it. Less than half returned, but in victory (this also helps explain why the Sar-kuhn were able to fight them for so long).
After remaining dormant for half a century, the Cataclysm returned and struck a bargain with the defeated Sar-kuhn. Allow it to consume as it pleases, and it will feed them the resources they need to fight the Novan empire.
Thus, with the invasion of the agricultural colony Mulcibus, the Three-Thousand year war between these two races began.
The First Age details many battles and incidents and scenes that took place throughout the first

thousand years from the perspectives of either side of the war as well as different civilizations that got caught up in it. It highlights how the constant conflict shot forward the entire galaxies technological progression faster than anyone had seen before. Suddenly new advancements were coming out every five or ten years.
It should also be noted that in this galaxy, most races live up to 300 or so years, so this helps explain the lack of medical technology and advancement in general.

Questions, thoughts, criticisms?

>While the Novans will conquer your planet and force you to obey their rules under threat of force.
>They also don't try to get too involved in planetary politics of other races.
That seems contradicting if there enforcing their rules it kinda means they do care about politics.

Here is the basic idea of the universe so far:

A single being of unknown origin travels the world, he is known simply as "The Wanderer" some believe he is some form of messiah, others think he's the opposite. All that is known is that, if you find him, if you ask him for power and tell him how and why you want to change the world for the better, he will grant you the power to do so.

The only exception to those granted power directly by The Wanderer are those known as JC's, or "Jack's Children." See, the first man The Wanderer ever granted power to was from Gaul in the days of the Roman empire, who wanted to be able to have children, despite his infertility. The Wanderer granted him this power. Nobody knows exactly who this man is, but he has since become known as "Jack the Lad" as he used his power to impregnate barren women. Every so often, children are born with some minor super-power. These people are believed to be descended from Jack and The Wanderer is still providing power to his bloodline, though to what end, is unknown.

Although, not everyone granted power is a hero, specifically. Sometimes, the Wanderer grants people the power to choose champions to fulfil their ambitions. There are several teams of a nature like this:

The United Knighthood of Justice, usually shortened to UKJ or The Knights, are a team of Superpowered beings that patrol the world and try to stop war, keep peace and generally help where they can. Each member of the team is granted their power by a magical weapon that is forged by their founder. A Blacksmith from England that was granted immortality and the power to make these weapons when he asked The Wanderer for the power to create Knights that served the people, rather than the Lords and Kings.

When I mean they don't get involved I mean that they only do anything if they see you getting upity. They won't influence votes or decisions or any policies 99% of the time unless something REALLY obvious is going on.
Hell, even if you start manufacturing more arms and armor they likely won't say anything because they are confident could quell any rebellion.

What rules do they enforce?
Why bother taking a planet just to do nothing?
I like it.
>designing a capeshit universe with no Super-Villains
and now im worried villains are what creates conflicts even if you dont want to create villains the very act of having your heroes engage in conflict means sooner or later one group is gonna be a villain.
If thats your intention then alls good but if you don't want any villains at all you're fighting an uphill battle.

Mainly just "don't fucking fight anyone". The Novans like everything running smoothly, so they mainly seek to just stop all large-scale conflicts.

That's just what is told to the common people. Turns out, there's a secret society of a military industrial complex within the Novan trading companies that constantly influence military decisions with falsified evidence and bogus rumors. This is mainly how the war last so long, they saw a cash cow in the Sar-Kuhn and milked it for 3000 years.

an enjoyable reason and twist.

Thank you. I appreciate the validation, usually I don't get any responses.

id watch it.
Needs more drama
what kinda magicians? Stage Magicians or real one.

Stage magicians. I don't know enough about real magician lore but I've gone to several magic shows growing up to make fun of stage magicians

I meant like in Hogwarts with witches and wizards. its definitely an interesting concept. Really like the non-spoiled rich kid needs to be more of those.

(continued)

The Spiders are a group of assassins that stalk the world under the watchful eye of The Black Widow, a mysterious, shapeshifting figure that can see the future. Usually taking on the form of a woman, she doesn't see just THE future, but ALL futures. She see's the future's where Earth becomes the center of a utopian society where war, famine, disease and even death are little more than legend, and future's where Earth is little more than a smoldering crater, a hellscape that nothing in its right mind would ever attempt life. She is determined to create the former. Her assassins kill key targets that slowly push humanity towards utopia. The Assassins are powered by Symbionts, creatures that enter the assassins and grant them, not only unique powers, but also grant them the sum collective memory, knowledge and skills of those that the Symbionts formerly inhabited. The only overlying ability that all symbionts grant is access to a giant Were-Spider form.

Peregrine is one of the few solo heroes. A former Spider that rebelled against the Black Widow and wants to guide the world towards utopia without the spilling of blood. The Wanderer changed his Symbiont to allow him to take more of an Angelic form, spouting a brilliant golden set of wings. Although, Black Widow assures him that his goal is impossible and he only serves to get in the way of paradise, he is, nonetheless, determined to find a way, refusing to believe that Utopia can be built on a graveyard, and that if it has to be, then Humanity shouldn't accept that anyway.

TBC

There is a difference between a Villain and an Antagonist. The idea of the stories in this is to make the audience pick a side that best suits their views on morality.

>Thousand years before Aang, but a thousand years after Wan.
>Earth Kingdom is shattered into a series of states, with warlords battling for supremacy a la the Sengoku Jidai or the Warring States of Post-Han China.
>Avatar is off solving this crisis and nowhere to be seen.
>Story is about a single village ravaged by this conflict.
>Most of the men are dead or conscripted.
>Bandits plague the village
>Story is basically Seven Samurai meets High Noon.
>Water bender is a daughter of a caravan merchant who is murdered by the bandits. Is out for revenge and has only just recently discovered her ability to bend.
>Fire bender is a old noblewoman accompanied by boy toy valet, making a trek back to her country. she's a disgraced member of the elite
>Earth bender is a mute, an ex-criminal who's tongue was torn out by a local lord.
>Air bender is a disgraced drunkard of a monk who has lost connection with his spirituality, must regain his connection to train the waterbender

I'm imaging the Kambei Shimada of the group might be the village's defacto mayor, a scheming middle aged mother meets Littlefinger. I like the idea of staying true to certain realities, like language barriers and vastly varying customs while answer the question why would these random strangers protect this village.

It's weird how writing fan fiction has kind of freed me of the insecurity about my writing. "Who cares if its bad, it's just fan fiction!"

yes i meant antagonist sorry. Well im enjoying the premise so far and your comment and second group put my mind at ease. Best of luck

The SSSS, or Secret Society of Super Saviors, a team of JC's that are little better than Cosplayers and UKJ wannabe's. Headed by people such as Captain Monochrome, with the power to turn monochrome at will. The Engineer, a man with the power to look at an engine and tell you exactly what is wrong with it. The Nuclear Inferno, who can set parts of his body on fire at will... But has no natural protection from fire... and Vine, the plant whisperer, who can talk to plants (Unfortunately, plants aren't smart enough to communicate back.)

That's pretty much as far as I have for solid players in the game, I have a few more idea's but they need better fleshing out.

i had the same idea but on a more global scale
see

Never seen so much autism in a single thread.

Lets see what you got

Another idea that I had was a team of Ultra Patriots. Who want to make every country in the world "As great and free as America!!!" Sort of like Team America, but played dead serious.

kek although in the current climate that can be a death sentence

Truthful statement is truthful. If I'm not sure I try to plant another, simpler character throughline in the scene so the scene isn't wasted even if the audience loses the track of the conversation.

"This wasn't like the games. People's insides were pink and yellow and pale blue, once the blood drained off. And blood dried brown. He hated that brown, which you could see even when you looked away because it was EVERYWHERE. It was best to leave while it was still red and everything was unreal like a video game. And for gods sake don't slip on anything solid."

How's that sound?

(All names are working names)

In the far future, the sprawling metropolis of Starlight City is protected by the advanced superhero, the mysterious masked golden colossus known as Overman. Overman is adored and respected by the gentry of Starlight City due to his high-profile public appearances and his relentless war against the criminal element of the Undercity that threatens the good, middle/working-class people. The police and the city council love Overman, and all respect his judgement unilaterally.

Of course, this is all an illusion, to some extent. In reality, Overman is a machine, a robot created by the team of Dr. Hand and Dr. White. The goal was for Overman to eventually become the perfect leader of Starlight City, but soon Dr. White finds himself questioning why Overman is such a hero to the upper classes, while letting the lower classes in the Undercity rot away. In the eyes of Dr. White, Overman is more or less a soft tyrant, using his position as a "hero" to structure the city so that the forgotten underclass is written off and disposed of. Dr. White comes to a simple conclusion: if the Undercity's situation is going to improve, they need a hero of their own, too.

Enter the Night Rider, Dr. White's second creation. Not as advanced as Overman, Night Rider is built to be the dark savior of the Undercity, fighting to improve their condition. As Starlight City slowly becomes more and more tyrannical with Overman's guidance, Night Rider becomes a symbol of hope to the Undercity, their own masked hero who will save them from poverty and oppression. Soon, Night Rider decides for himself that there's only one way the Undercity can be saved: Starlight City's government must be overthrown, and Overman must die.

(cont.)

And so the rebellion begins, as the oppressed lower classes of Starlight City spill out into the streets of the upper city, led on by Night Rider to take back what's rightfully theirs. They're outgunned, but not outnumbered, and slowly but surely, they push the police back to city hall, where Night Rider finally comes face to face with Overman, and the two machine men finally have their fated battle...

...which is a resounding victory for Overman. Years of upgrades and technical improvements at the hands of Dr. Hand has made Overman stronger than ever before, and he trounces Night Rider with little effort. Night Rider isn't just effortlessly destroyed, he's exposed as a cold machine, not a man like his followers believed. Brokenhearted with the death of their hero, the rebelling Undercity dwellers are easily routed, dispersed, and massacred by the police. Horrified at the carnage his creations have caused, Dr. White leaves Starlight City for the dead, empty wasteland beyond the town.

As time passes, the brokenhearted Dr. White builds a brother to Night Rider, another machine man, this time just to be his assistant and his son to keep him company as he lives out his days in exile in a wasteland shantytown. Meanwhile, Overman and Dr. Hand slowly push Starlight city into increased automation, disenfranchising the lower classes even further as the city becomes increasingly under the control over machines. The class divide becomes even greater, as the living conditions in the Undercity become worse and worse.

Dr White believes that it's too late for Starlight City, and the world isn't worth saving. His "son", however, an almost-identical copy by the name of Day Rider disagrees, believing that it's not too late to finish what Night Rider started, and save the city. One night, ignoring his creator's wishes, Day Rider flees the shantytown and returns to Starlight City, hell-bent on being the hero the people need.

When he arrives, Day Rider has a hard time fitting in and finding a place, since he's not technically human (as much as he looks the part). However, when he saves a little old lady from a construction robot gone berserk, she lets him move in with her in her undercity slum. Slowly but surely Day Rider follows in the footsteps of his older brother, fighting both common criminal rackets and berserk machines in the Undercity. Like Night Rider before him, Day Rider becomes a beacon of hope for the people of the Undercity.

However, the problem of robots going berserk is getting worse and worse. Led by a mysterious cloaked figure, robots everywhere in Starlight City are going rogue, attacking anyone around them and fleeing to parts unknown. The police and Overman can only do so much to fight them off, and slowly but surely, the terror threat is growing. It all comes to a head as the renegade robots seize control of a major power plant. Realizing that the damage would be catastrophic, Day Rider sets out to defeat the robot army once and for all.

Day Rider arrives at the plant just in time to see Overman defeated and cast aside at the hands of the mysterious red figure, having defeated him without raising a finger. He makes mincemeat of the figure's minions and confronts him in the core of the plant, only for the figure to remove his cloak and reveal himself to Day Rider and the rest of the city- it's Night Rider, still alive after all of those years.

Night Rider explains that after his "death", his remains were unceremoniously dumped in a landfill outside of town, where a long-forgotten AI, one of Dr. Hand's first creations, found him and merged with him to bring him back online. In line with his new AI friend's omnicidal ambitions, Night Rider believes that the city doesn't deserve a hero, and only deserves to be destroyed. To that end, he reveals a bomb implanted in the core of the plant.

Day Rider tries his hardest to talk his older brother back to his senses as the two fight, but Night Rider refuses, explaining how in his dying moments he watched his followers immediately abandon him and give up. He says that humanity no longer deserves to rule, and that the future belongs to the machines. Of course, this goes against his AI companion's belief, which is that all life, man or machine, should be consumed and destroyed. The internal conflict causes Night Rider to go haywire.

The police arrive, and one officer warns Day Rider that Night Rider is preparing an attack on him. Without thinking, Day Rider strikes a blow that mortally wounds his brother. Damaged and dying (again), Night Rider tells his brother that this is what humans do. However, for the machine's sake, he tells Day Rider how to disarm the bomb. Day Rider consoles his brother as he dies, taking a piece of his red cloak to make into a scarf.

The policemen, having discovered a defeated Overman and having witnessed Day Rider kill Night Rider, celebrate him as their new hero, congratulating him for killing his vile terrorist brother. Infuriated and disgusted with their lack of empathy for his ordeal, Day Rider flees the plant with his brother's body, leaving the police behind. The bomb goes off and the plant goes critical, destroying a significant portion of Starlight City and the Undercity. The truth about the blast is kept under wraps, as a new Overman is introduced as if nothing happened to the original. While Day Rider isn't directly blamed for the incident, the city administration names him as a "person of interest", turning both the regular city-dwellers and the population of the undercity against him.

Brokenhearted and disenfranchised, Day Rider buries his brother in the wasteland. No longer is he interested in saving the people of Starlight City: now he only intends to avenge his brother's death on the city's tyrannical administration.

Later, Dr. Hand visits Night Rider's grave, impressed that his first creation, an incomplete failure, managed to turn Dr. White's creation into the proper manifestation of Hand's vision, a machine that belived itself superior to mankind and eager to replace it. He notes that the damage caused by Night Rider's second insurrection has set back his agenda of replacing men with superior machines, but only temporarily. He off-handedly remarks that at some point he'll have to come back and resurrect Night Rider, making him on par with Overman this time (with Overman previously having been defeated by a virus injected by the AI). The story ends with an amused Dr. Hand declaring that the future is looking brighter than ever.

So yeah, that's the plot of what I would want to be the first volume in a series of graphic novels. Obviously the Protomen were a major influence, but I fiddled around a bit with the story of the first album and added in bits of the second alongside my favorite parts of Spider Man and X-Men lore to make it distinguishable. In terms of character designs. Japanese Tokuatsu is a larger influence. I have some (really bad) character art concepts that I did more as a reference for myself and any artist I'd manage to sell the script to, but IDK if they're really worth posting.

Thoughts on the overall story? Critiques, complaints, compliments?

I wrote two different science fiction stories. The first one is basically Guardians of the Galaxy with a bit of The Force Awakens and the second is basically The Defenders but even sillier, if anyone is interested.
ao3 . org/works/12975225
ao3 . org/works/12489456
I didn't base the villain in the second one off of Trump, honest.
Also, I like writing romance.

I wanted to write a story about an OC Lantern that works for a multiverse-patrolling United Lantern Core, but all their rings are gimmicky original ones instead of the real ones. Also, while it seems like kiddy DB Xenoverse-inspired stuff at first, it starts to seriously examine the morality of a multiverse-patrolling organization that trains soldiers from birth and sends them out to "Fix" universes and the "Most important" planets in them from a young age.

It's kinda fun but the prose isn't fancy enough. It feels like it'd be better as a comic.

enjoyed it

>tfw just started working at a new cushy job
>have plenty of time in between dealing with people to bring my laptop and start writing
>thinking about just doing this and starting this week
I really need to just sit down and write something. I love writing but I have motivation issues. A lot of the stuff I want to start writing I also won't have a real chance to really write unless I get a job at DC or something. I have ideas for Zatanna stories in my head for example but I'm not even close to actually realizing them.

I want to get started on my magical girl cheerleader idea already.

>I want to get started on my magical girl cheerleader idea already.
Also speaking of, I have my characters' abilities all fleshed out but I'm not sure what the source of their powers should be and I've been stuck on that few a while now.

Figured I'd bump with my art since I decided to sit down and do some sketches for what Overman would look like. Yeah, I know it's bad, but again, it's just a reference for other writers. Top row is Day Rider on left, Night Rider on right. Bottom row is AI on left with a corrupted construction bot, more of Night Rider on right.

Thanks! Anything in particular stand out?

Topic for conversation: things you want to write, even if you never expect to get around to writing.

Okay so, I have a few ideas, please let me know if any of this sounds interesting:

1) A show about the everyday life of a teenage girl and her friends who have arrived aboard a generation ship to another solar system to build a colony. The sci-fi stuff isn't very futuristic though, and the tech is not far from what we have now. That's because the ship was built in the near future, out of necessity, as a last ditch effort to save humanity when a series of catastrophic events fucked life on Earth. The show has a hopeful and lighthearted tone, it mostly revolvs around the usual problems a 13 year old kid can have, while in the background it can explore more serious topics, such as the organization of society or the existential questions and the nature of life. It's a slice-of-life kind of thing for the most part, but there are mysteries to solve and a bit of adventuring to do exploring the exotic flora and fauna and discovering the ruins of a long gone civilization.

2) An early XX century-like low-magic fantasy setting. A bunch of teens meet by chance on a train. One is a son of the chief of the state security service. He's helping his dad with the investigation of a recent series of terrorist attacks (or more like investigating on his own in an attempt to prove himself). Another one is a princess of a small neighboring state, exiled after a revolution. She can sometimes see visions of the future and has other minor magical powers, and she's accompanied by the ghost of her mentor. The third one is a redhead tomboy who loves chemistry (explosions in particular) and doesn't like staying in one place for too long because of those pesky law enforcement guys who hate fun and take property rights too seriously. Her parents are in jail for assisting the local branch of the revolutionary movement that dethroned the princess's family. Also, she meets the princess before boarding the train, and the princess kinda saves her life. Anyway, the last one is a big guy who can turn into an even bigger demonic guy and is pretty angsty about it for some reason (probably because it's a side effect of his deal with an ancient god that he accidentally made back at the orphanage).

Turns out that they're all headed to the same city to the same event (a festival). When they get to know each other a little, they all form a strong friendship that lasts forever. Lol nah, they all distrust each other, but decide to stick together for their own reasons (e.g. the first guy suspects that the tomboy could be connected to his investigation). Intrigues ensue, but in the end they do become allies and friends.

3) Orlando Furioso as an action cartoon. The setting is early medieval Europe (and elsewhere), muslims are invading France and Charlemagne's paladins are fighting them. Except there are also sorcerers, hippogriffs and whatnot. Paladins (as well as the greatest Saracen knights, and some others) have superpowers channeled through their helmets and/or weapons, each with their own abilities, special effetcs and the like. The plot is pretty much what it is in the book, but with some added fluff: Angelica (it's an alias) is a Chinese princess that almost every guy falls in love with (that's cause she was magically genetically modified for that). She came to Europe with her brother who then challenged everyone to a joust for her hand in marriage (this was a part of a Chinese keikaku for an easy world domination). Anyway, Angelica is not very fond of being used like this, and eventually she runs away, while Orlando, Charlemagne's best paladin, loses his shit over his love for her. His paladin powers activate hulk mode and he goes wrecking everything around for, like, the rest of the story. In the end, Astolfo, another paladin, has to fly to the Moon in an ancient spacecraft to find the cure for Orlando's madness.

Tom n Artie
-Two interdimensional best buddy mercenaries from different worlds. Each contract they take is a wildly different zany adventure as they meet strange and interesting characters to fight and trick.

I actually used to post about this project alot in these threads a few years ago. It's only until recently that it's actually happening and I'll be pitching it to a publisher soon.

Rather enjoyed the beginning and climax. Not so much the names though but like you said thats a work in progress

The Day Rider/Night Rider thing reference the color schemes and are an Always Sunny gag. Obviously I'd never name the protagonist Day Rider, that's really dumb. Not sure about Overman now that I've more or less cemented his design (gonna touch up on it) but I'd like something a little less overtly sinister.

Touched up Overman's design and added it to the final compilation.

The Rider brothers have superhuman strength and agility, as well as a "molecular disruption" device that emits a field capable of disintegrating anything it touches on a molecular level and is charged with kinetic energy. Their helmets are also mounted with laser cannons.

Overman has superhuman strength and agility, genius-level intelligence, flight and general electricity powers. He has multiple generators stored all over his body and can deliver charged punches, apply general sheev-style lightning, and fire electrolasers from his eyes.

forgot the actual compilation!

Don't hesitate to criticize and give your opinion on text and pictures, even harshly.

What's the relationship of your protagonist and antagonist? Friend turned enemies? Chosen hero vs ancient evil? Enemies because of circumstance?

Naive childlike villain convinced the hero is their best friend and constantly infuriating them, hero has to put up with it because villain's powers completely hard counter the hero's but also because they actually are their only friend despite the fact that they would never admit it

10/10 if done good

Kind of working on this Doc Savage style pulp action adventure story set in a pseudo late 19th century era landscape, but with original nations and history of my own creation loosely based off of real history. I plan on developing the story from heroic expedition adventures into a theater of war based off of world war 1/2. Centered around a man named Nigel Renegade who abandons his career and education at an illustrious military academy to pursue an active heroic ideal of mythical heroes of the past that he believes has been lost in the rapidly modernizing world, and out of disillusionment in a future as a member of the military bureaucracy.

Man, I remember reading about this one all the time in these threads. Crazy to see it actually evolving

Yeah feels weird that all the pieces began falling into place. I worked on other smaller projects for a while and worked with the artist who eventually joined me on Tom n Artie.

Can you tell us how did you get a foot in the industry?

Also can you tell what I must change in my project to make it more marketable?

You could make your characters not ugly as sin, for one thing

They used to be even uglier (pic related) but you are right. I haven't settled for a style yet, because I really started into drawing only since 2017, until the I was too busy writing.

If you want to see the latest art, take a look at the pitch bible:
>docdroid.net/aWdaibc/prebible-internet.pdf

Thank you for answering.

Writing a comic about the world ending but some office towers survived and have been made into little communities where people live in them, and there's an arena that they use to determine legal shit. grudges, etc
The main character's husband was the last human alive in a previous time line so the god of the universe gave him the chance to go back in time and stop it, he ends up possessing his wife's arm as a kid. They end up failing to stop the end of the world so we follow them as they deal with all that nonsense.
It reminds me of Stan from American Dad for some reason

More for the husband, the "full power" design isn't going to look like this in the comic itself, this was just design drafts.

I had an idea about a 10 minute cartoon format about an old and senile Indiana Jones type finding a boy and girl at his door who claim to be his kids. In reality they are gnomes sent out by Jones' nemesis, who's goal is to slightly annoy Jones. Hilarity ensues as the 'kids' find a liking in Jones as a parental figure and are doing their best to keep up the illusion.

But I scrapped the idea, there are enough shows with uncles or grandparents taking kids on adventures.