ITT: Favorite Simpsons Quotes

Wahoo!

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Thank you, please return

I'll see you in hell

Exemplary...

What the deuce?

B'OH!

That's from Super Mario not Simpsons

Annoyed Grunt

Homer: NEVER! Never, Marge. I can't live the button-down life like you. I want it all: the terrifying lows, the dizzying highs, the creamy middles. Sure, I might offend a few of the bluenoses with my cocky stride and musky odors - oh, I'll never be the darling of the so-called "City Fathers" who cluck their tongues, stroke their beards, and talk about "What's to be done with this Homer Simpson?"
Marge: Look, just get rid of the sugar, okay?

Well well, look at the city slicker pulling up in his fancy German car.

This car was made in Guatemala!

Okay, I'll tell ya. You are the worst person I know. You constantly hit on your best friend's wife, the man pays for your food and rescued you from certain death, and this is how you repay him? And to add insult to injury, you defecate all over his yard. And you're such a sponge. You pay for nothing, you always say "Oh, I'll get you later," but later never comes. And what really bothers me, is you pretend you're this deep guy who loves women for their souls when all you do is date bimbos. Yeah, I date women for their bodies, but at least I'm honest about it. I don't buy them a copy of "Catcher in the Rye" and then lecture them with some seventh grade interpretation of how Holden Caulfield is some profound intellectual. He wasn't! He was a spoiled brat! And that's why you like him so much, he's you! God, you're pretentious! And you delude yourself by thinking you're some great writer even though you're terrible. You know, I should've known Cheryl Tiegs didn't write me that note. She would've known there's no "a" in the word "definite." And I think what I hate most about you is your textbook liberal agenda, how we should "legalize pot, man," how big business is crushing the underclass, how homelessness is the biggest tragedy in America. Well, what have you done to help? I work down at the soup kitchen, Brian. Never seen you down there! You wanna help? Grab a ladle! And by the way, driving a Prius doesn't make you Jesus Christ! Oh, wait! You don't believe in Jesus Christ or any religion for that matter, because "religion is for idiots!" Well, who the hell are you to talk down to anyone? You failed college twice, which isn't nearly as bad as your failure as a father! How's that son of yours you never see? But you know what? I could forgive all of that, all of it, if you weren't such a bore! That's the worst of it, Brian. You're just a big, sad, alcoholic bore.

>97430750
here's your (you) get out

NO!
AAH! Hey, get off my sugar! Bad bees, bad!
Ow! OWWWW! Oh, they're defending themselves somehow!

Exactly...

>johnny tight lips, where ya hit?
>i ain't sayin' nottin'.
>well, what do i tell the doctor?
>tell him to go suck a lemon.

Cowabunga, dude!

Hey, don't buy a pig!

Post and create Simpsons gifs

frinkiac.com/

>This isn't a very happy birthday for Rex Banner.

...

I SENTENCE YOU TO KISS MY ASS

>failing to quote
fucking kek

I always liked this piece of dialog from Family Guy, in context it's pretty dumb, but by itself you can really feel the hatred. Besides, The Catcher in the Rye fucking sucks. So that's a plus.

If anyone wants me, I'll be in my room

I felt bad for him. He was just trying to do his job.

Shut up, Lisa.

He wasn't wrong about it all, he was just also awful. At least he stayed mostly entertaining. Brian became insufferable over time. Especially after he became an anti religious ass (despite being well versed in the bible and not afraid to quote it before), and the show just moulded itself so he would appear "correct" all the time.

TRAMBOBOLEEN TRAMBOPAPALEEN
Say what now?

Eeeh-Ye-e-e-es?

youtube.com/watch?v=XsNIFD7TxwU

>At least he stayed mostly entertaining
Not really. At some point Quagmire stopped being the funny pervert and became 'i'm-angry-all-the-damn-time'. That was okay in a few jokes (like the 'quagmire always gets pissed at sports' running gag) but they started overdoing that.

Plus the speech has the same impact as a baby fart has on a tornado given how much shit he did (including some shit he complained about brian too). Hell, even some random one-off character would have been better than him to give the speech.

Well, pardon us, Mr. Gucci loafers

I was saying boo.

I bought these shoes from a hobo!

For all the people out there who claim Lisa was never daughteru material.

Well la-di-da, Mr. Park Avenue manicure.

...

>he's my dad so I have to defend his bullshit
that's bullshit, if you have a shit dad then he's a shitty dad, not your fault. Relatives have no obligation to like or love each other, those things are earned.

du-oh!

>the context of the scene and the episode
>thinks an 8 year old girl would react this way at all

Lisa was such a different character in the first two seasons.

...

¡Ay Carumba!

Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to stop playing with that children's toy.

In America.
First you get the sugar.
Then you get the power.
Then you get the women.

Disney is about to own the Simpsons, you all know that right?

What, are you afraid they'll make it worse?

Well y....
I....

mm-hmm, go watch your cartoon show, user

They'll do a couch gag about it at best and move forward.

Disney knows better than to fuck with a formula that already makes money.

Prepare for the sudden influx of people who say that the entire Al Jean era was concentrated gold, and that Disney Simpsons was a mistake.

>people who say that the entire Al Jean era was concentrated gold
Thankfully those people don't exist.

Kek.

But Marge, that little guy hasn't done anything yet. Look at him. He's gonna do something, and you know it's gonna be good!

By far one of Krusty's best lines
youtube.com/watch?v=BOKaqBfhcIE

20 dollars, aww I wanted a peanut
>20 dollars can buy you many peanuts
Explain how
>money can be exchanged for goods and services
Woohooo!