This is what is coming next

Anyone want to short-circuit this by meme'ing a ton of these and making them soooo ridiculous/absurd that they become an ongoing joke?

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=C7zEibNcejA
youtube.com/watch?v=M2p_8HEZd7w&t=15m3s
twitter.com/NSFWRedditVideo

It could be like all of those
>it was my privilege"
memes, where men would do things like pay for women's dinners as an act of dominance and make them cry and shit, but in the opposite direction.

You need to put up obviously fake posters in universities.

Think Brass Eye levels of stupidity but something idiots will still fall for. Be subtle.

Today I was raped by a pack of Trump supporting niggers wearing stolen Maga hats so I got on the quickest plane to Australia and currently posting from an abbo hut in Darwin surrounded by petrol and dead Australians send help

I Think even the onion levels of stupid would go unnoticed by these idiots

I have been having moments like this all fucking day. These women are actually crazy. I watched a woman scream sexual assault while 10 other dudes watched her continuously and aggressively confront a man who "hit her with his car"

seriously feel free to just beat the fuck out of these protesters.

I was at a farm in Ohio and a cow jad a MAGA hat on and he kicked me in the shin and called me a faggot and told me I was a poop nose. I'm scared to live in this country.

Today, I went to go stock up on maple syrup, beaver tails, and bagged milk. I got off my moose and made it halfway to the Inuit trading post before an illegal American liberal immigrant in a "I'm with Her" shirt grabbed me by the toque and whispered "Are you privileged now, you fucking while male?"

I thawed. I skated back to my moose once xe walked and rode straight home. I need to remove the male genitalia from my moose, to be safe. I don't think I'll feel safe in this country ever again.

brilliant!

Underrated 10/10

>Thawed
Sides gone

...

If I had a dollar for every time this has happened to me, I'd have zero dollars. Coincidentally, if I had a dollar for every time this has happened at all, I'd have zero dollars.

>things that never happened #6435

What's with all these fake stories?

What are these idiots trying to achieve anyway, set the US/whole world on fire? Because that's what's going to happen if they persist in their unfathomable and relentless stupidity.

Kek

>not also buying poutine

Funny, because it's all true.
I'm still afraid to go to Tim Hortons for a Double Double.
Damn you Lena D.

Get Ryan Gosling involved.

Maybe we should pitch in and start spewing out similar crazy stories.

this one is already pretty ridiculous desu

>thawed

It's the fucking goobergator stories all over again, who has that comic saved?

Nevermind, didn't take long to find one.

We need a FB fan page and Twitter account named something like "Abuses of Donald Trump Supporters" or something similar

Sounds like a porno scene.

Today I went to stock up on chocolate globbernaugts, meat water and breaddystacks. I got out of my motorised rollingham and made it half way to the shop when a man grabbed me and whispered "are you scared now, you British cunt."

>thawed

fucking lol

When I think of roving bands of conservatives harassing every liberal in sight, I think of Los Angeles, a place where democrats outnumber republicans 75-25.

I saw a truck with two Mexicans while filling up gas and I started them down and they started speaking Spanish and I shouted"HEY we don't do that here anymore!"

and then she had the most powerful orgasm in her life

>A man in a MAGA hat
>Los Angeles

come on at least be realistic

...

Liberals don't use the word MAGA, change that and you're good.

GJ leaf

??? Do people believe this shit?

yes well done, leaf

>I work [...]
nobody believes that

i think we should meme JUST ONE death of some total anti-trump faggot
you know i had an idea of that earlier but now i don't remember who i had in mind

If you see sides flying by, those are mine, I'll need them back.

I went to the store today and when I got out of my car a tough woman with short hair wearing a MAGA hat grabbed my penis and said are you scared now you coon, why don't you come with me so I can use my strap on to crotch punch your fartbox

so I did it was awesome

Why the fuck are they making up such blatantly false stories?

Someone should stop those crotch grabbing homosexuals and take away their right to marry and adopt

Today, I went to go stock up on feijoada, caipirinha, and cocaine. I got off my monkey and made it halfway to the crack house before a coxinha Temer supporter in a "Fora Dilma" shirt grabbed me by the chinelo and whispered "Are you feeling impeached already?"
I froze. I ran in flipflops back to my monkey once he walked and rode straight to my barraco. I need to remove the PT star from my monkey, to be safe. I don't think I'll feel safe in this country ever again.

>seriously feel free to just beat the fuck out of these protesters.

don't do that, just get their plate and sue them or call the police and say they seemed to be intoxicated while driving

>I thawed
Okay, that was pretty good.

345 people seemed to.

id really wonder how they would react with these "reversed" stories,
"waahhh i feel oppressed by minorities coz im white"
showing the hypocrisy and how easy is to be feel a victim

I'm game

i wish - HR is shit nearly everywhere

Oh those were great. Does anyone have some handy?

>It's 11/9/2016, 9:00
>be me
>progressive liberal demi-gender pangender trans academic
>get in car go to buy a pack of magnums for my genderqueer black boyfriend and myself
>car is smashed, on fire with slashed tires, a giant swastika is painted on the hood next to the words America Is Great Again!

This is so sad I can't believe it's all real!

My sides just voted "Leave".

Thank you.

Was filling up my gas tank today & a bunch of guys in MAGA hats kept yelling "TRUMP" over and over again.

When I told them to stop, they called me a stupid nigger.

I'm not even an african-american what's up with that?

This is fucking gold based Brazil

I gave birth this morning, and as I held my newborn baby in my arms, zie (obviously I won't assume gender) looked up at me and said, "who won the election, Papa?". I fought back the tears as I had to tell zer the racists had won and elected Fuhrer Trump. It broke my heart to see the optimism vanish from zer bright eyes. I asked what I could do to make it all better and received the reply, "Put me back in." I hope you're happy, Trump supporters.

Gold!

>mere hours after Trump is elected he sends word to sleeper agents all over the country
>commence the Grabbening
>men everywhere now free from years of feminist whining stand up and sniff the air
>they begin to beat their chests and slap the ground chanting grab the pussy, grab the pussy
>soft at first but louder and louder until it's a deafening roar
>they burst forward from manhole covers and jump from offices where they earn one dollar for every 79c a woman makes
>flooding streets and parks with infallibly rigid erections
>men run from woman to woman hooting and furiously grabbing pussy
>tights and yoga pants everywhere are shredded by the kung-fu like pussy grip
>there are casualties
>men develop carpal tunnel from so much pussy grabbing
>fingers are raw and blistered from having to grab untold volumes of pussy
>fat women blog angrily that no one is grabbing their pussy
>days later bodies are strewn all over the streets, there is no pussy left to grab
>men with bloody stumps for fingers lie exhausted propped up against cars and lamp posts
>Trump had finally seized the means of production

Today, I went to go stock up on Miller, beef jerky, and menthol Grizzly. I hopped out of my Chevy and made it halfway to the Rutland Maplefield's before a pale scrawny flatlander in a plaid shirt grabbed me by the beard and whispered "Where can I buy a house, you hick?"

I chewed. I sauntered back to my truck once he walked and rode straight to the farm. I need to remove the safety from my .308, to be safe. I don't think I'll feel safe in this state ever again.

I was walking back from my day job as a transsexual model when a fucking leave voter came up to me, and grabbed both my penis and vagina simultaneously, saying "Why didn't you want to remain the same gender like you did the EU!" All of the leave voters around me joined in, groping my male breasts, sucking the milk out of them (yes, I lactate. Get over it, it's 2016).

I don't think I'll ever feel safe around white males ever again.

>and jump from offices where they earn one dollar for every 79c a woman makes
That's where I lost it completely. Great job m8

>work at nigger infested company
>niggers constantly talk shit
>tell them you're glad Trump won
>get reported to HR for made up muh racism stories
>get fired
I believe that they actually fired 50 people.

>outrageously high number of people respond to a vitriolic and emotional election
>we decided to fire four dozen people
>fuck the logistics of that and how departments would suffer firing that many people so quickly

>this definitely happened

is everyone telling their friends "bullshit. we don't believe your story"..?

Bump

This arvo, I went to go stock up on vb, snags, and shrimp. I got off my kangaroo and made it halfway to woolies before an abo in a "the greens" shirt grabbed my by my blue singlet and whispered "ayyy you fukken white dog this aaar laaand"

I shitposted. I wandered back to my roo once the abo passed out and bounced straight to the pub. I need to bin the fuck off we're full sticker from my roo, to be safe. Don't recon ill feel safe in this suburb ever again

On the way to the library to check out my favourite book Mein Kampf and a diverse, multicultural group of middle class white millennials stopped me and asked if I'm with her. I told them no and that I thought Trump represented hope for the long ignored, much beleaguered white working class whereas Hillary represented the corruption and war which was destroying the western world. They began to shout "white fucking male!" over and over along with telling me they were having panic attacks while sobbing uncontrollably. One shook so violently their thick rimmed, ironic glasses fell off. I don't feel safe in this country anymore.

Today, I went to go stock up on cottage cheese, garlic and golden teeth. I got out of my motorized outhouse and made it halfway to the Garbage Dump Emporium before an illegal cygani emigrant back home from a 3-year London deployment, in a brown-stained tent grabbed me by the rags and whispered "Are you privileged now, you fucking white-ish-kind-of-but-not-really male?"

I stank. I stole right back to my motorhouse once it walked and shat straight home. I need to remove the gypsy-baby-horn from my poopiemobile to be safe. I don't think I'll feel white in this country ever again.

ten/10.

>Chickens tell me to kill myself for being a nigger again.

>What are these idiots trying to achieve anyway, set the US/whole world on fire?

Actually, yes.

Problem (that they create), reaction, solution

I'll give you a hint, the solution always involves more state power, and/or further infringement upon your liberties

hilarious

I feel oppressed by minorities because they're more likely to commit violent crime.

I had just left the orphanage where I volunteer. A bald headed man with a swastika tattoo on top of his head wearing a MAGA hat approached and spat in my face. When I turned to run, he pulled down my pants and pushed me over. That's when all of his friends wearing MAGA hats and chain wallets rushed over and started kicking me, calling me a pickle tickler sissy faggot. Finally a tall African American man came running to my rescue. They all ran off at first glimpse of this real man. That restored my faith in humanity but a Trump presidency still frightens me.

It is a joke. Saw it after BREXIT, lefties will throw out a lot of made up stories for a few weeks and shut up when no one listens to them.

Kek

is there a hashtag on twitter for stories like this ?

if not, we should brainstorm something, something related to the "the us sucks because of trump" feeling.
>these are the people trump dumps on us
>us is now a garbage "trump"

>US is not his #GarbageTrump

i duno, it need work

>tfw you realize social media was made to deceive the masses

>I thawed

Based leaf

It's like the Brexit result all over again. Expect more Facebook anecdotes.

Apex kek

...

This thread has obliterated my sides, gj lads

...

10/10 based canada

>90k people liked this

Today I went to the Coop in Rosengård to stock up on pickled herring and glög wearing my customised "Make Sweden Great Again" hat. The gypsy begging in front of the store grabbed me by the meatballs and said, "ge mig alla dina småpengar, din fascistisk jävel!" Since it's just about impossible to get physical money anymore, I swished him 500 kronor on his brand new Iphone 7 plus (which I was a little jealous of, as I only have an Iphone 6) and drove straight home. I need to remove the Sverige Demokraterna sticker from my bumper, so well as demolish the shrine to Jimmie Åkesson in my bedroom. I never felt safe in this multikulti hellhole to begin with

no need. i saw a video earlyer of a bing of blacks beating up a man, and stealing his car, And screaming : DID YOU VOTE FOR TRUMP ? its on live leak somehow google does not want it in youtube.

Found it burgers. You own me a green card.
youtube.com/watch?v=C7zEibNcejA

And so, the redemption of Canada has begun.

At work all day today my coworkers were playing Pink Floyd's The Wall in a threatening manner. I had to spend my lunch break in my car. I don't feel safe at work anymore.

hook me up with one of those rerelease Sega MegaDrives and I'll call it even.

Carl the cuck.

I was walking down the street in Manhattan when all of a sudden a plane flew by me, and into a building. It was wearing a Make America Great again Hat and grabbed the north tower by the pussy. She couldnt scream rape, the poor soul.

What a disgusting America we now live in, This is Trump's America

it's projection

trump supporter at an anti-trump demonstration got sexually assault by one of these retards.

youtube.com/watch?v=M2p_8HEZd7w&t=15m3s

lmao, I just kekked out my spleen. Capped for posterity

remember leaf. if you thaw your enemies, they win

...

man what i wouldn't have given to have been there with a baseball bat. they would have been cleaning up nigger brains for days.

>thawed
Kek based leaf let's must start also spreading lying stories on fb

Holy shid