Achewood's "The Great Outdoor Fight" - Storytime

12 years ago today, this storyline commenced. Might as well run through it. Alt-text included.

>The Great Outdoor Fight: details forthcoming.

>Be sure to tune in next time, when we continue to Ride With Rodney!

Ah yes, the best storyline.

I always felt the ending was kind of lackluster.

>The assumption of this comic is that you all are familiar with my neighbor

>Ray Smuckles is definitely known locally as a dude you don't want to have lost a fight to.

>Carl Veldt Grimps, DQ, 2/6/73

>No dude in a million knows the fight so well

>Probably a good idea to dust off a couple Polish before the big round

>This strip relies heavily on the Gossipy Hot Dog Chef archetype

>I guess you just step on Sound and Motion's head until he looks like a god-damned religious icon

>Tomorrow: Asses become kicked, handed (to), and served (up, cold).

>Most of these guys think three dollars is a good price for wine

>Ron is so furious about his bad wife

>Ray doesn't know what he's talking about, but he also seems crazy to speak confidently about stumps

>Barry King's blog, Gasps and Giggles, is very good.

>At least he went out recumbently

>Is Teodor about to find a bunch of pillows artfully arranged beneath Beef's bedspread?

>Up through panel seven, this is EXACTLY how a honky-tonk-style blowjob goes.

>Ray had originally hung back from the Tenmen because he isn't much of a fan.

>I suppose he'd start off with something like Eye Of The Tiger

>Onward we move to day two.

>There are no side dishes.

>Off-camera, Cody Travis outlines his new album, In Christ Our Fight Is Won.

>It is recommended that the bird be in the back of a dude's car for up to half an hour.

>p'too

>We'll catch up with the English nerds later

>You can't really call yourself a cartoonist until you've penned a few Searching For Father bits

>Something in Ted's past has made him need to stuff his trousers.

>You made your bed, now severely beat your friends in it!

>The Schweitz Triplets were crowd favorites in the post-Parent Trap era

>The middle vehicle in a convoy shot must ALWAYS be doing a wheelie

>Ray based this take-down on the recipe for Steak Diane

>razed to the ground and salted!

>Barry is blogging so fast his legs have instinctively gone into a squat position

>When Uncle George was younger, he used to like jerks, but jerks are different these days.

>I cut out seventeen panels of Vlad saying, You talkin to me? You talkin to me?

Fin.

Thank you.

Achewood is one of my favorite dead webcomics.

I love how this autist straight-fag turns into a goddamn chessmaster this one time his autism is relevant. It's beautiful.

Beef has precisely two good things in his life at this point: his Fight hobby, and his friendship with Ray. Without knowing it yet, he's listening to the circumstances that led to Ray's conception. But even here, the author undercuts the pathos with "Oh man Bob Raffles was basically the worst announcer ever".

He was in talks with some indie film company to make a live action movie of this. Like all of Onstad's projects, it never even got to the next phase

No kidding. Can't imagine it being good anyway.

>I always felt the ending was kind of lackluster
That's the point. That's literally the entire point that he was going for. They built up this huge legend, everything was about legacy and myth and bloodlines, and Beef wanted to cap it off with the perfect send-off but instead he gets this downer moment with his uncle and a return to obscurity at home. It's supposed to be a huge contrast between the extraordinary and the bland, which is Achewood's strength.

Excellent. I enjoyed binging the entire comic last year. I first thought Roastbeef was the best, but now I've realized that was my empathy with him overcoming me. Ray is the best, and Cornelius has the best blog.

you are now aware achewood is a modern retelling of winnie the pooh

Legendary.

>2006
That was the year God Hand came out. That was the last year Achewood was good. That was the last really great year.

achewood was solid up until the end, man. the last year was a bit lacking but it was so comforting to be able to read a new one every week. must have done two or three solid rereads since it ended. shit gets me every time

This was one of the most magical things I read while it was happening back in the day, but sadly as with many things time has rendered it into little more than a quaint memory. Not to diminish his accomplishment in any way. You just can never go back to that magic.

You fucked up by not starting with the bit where Ray and Todd produce nutsacks for phones

THE THINGS I'VE BEEN DENIED IN THIS WORLD.