You are now in charge of the Nemesis movie. What do?

You are now in charge of the Nemesis movie. What do?

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-Hire Christian Bale and make him do the voice in every line of dialogue.
-Show the gay son having sex with his sister

>-Show the gay son having sex with his sister

Hire porn actors for that hard NC-17 rating.

Hire Uve Bowe to direct, write it myself in 2 days by directly copying the dialogue from the comic, hire the most passable actors who will work for nothing. Embezzle as much of the film budget as possible.

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Make it an animated movie and hire Kevin Conroy as Nemesis' voice.

Blow the money on hookers, coke, and someone to kill Millar.

>Springtime for Millar

get the director of Crank to do it starring Statham

Run it as a Kickass Sequel. Hitgirl vs The Nemesis Corporation.

Cast hugo weaving, tarantino as director, link it with the kickass movies and add Punisher.

keep the cash, leave the country

The funniest part is that this is how you make a perfect Nemesis movie. All you need is Tommy Wiseau just to make the movie even more of a "masterpiece" than the comic.

*Tommy Wiseau as Nemesis, I might add.

>Super violent to a cartoonish degree
>mindless large-scale destruction
>Plot is a shitpile of "just as planned" convenience and illogical behavior
Zack was born to direct this movie.

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Director: Zack Snyder
Screenplay: David Goyer
starring
Nicholas Cage as Nemesis/Matt Anderson
Brendan Fraser as Blake Morrow
Gary Busey as The President

Go full Starship Troopers and make the movie a work of satire that mocks the source material.

Fucking perfect

I would rather an irredeemable film adaption

I would use costumes so cheap, 90s Nightman TV series would look like a high-budget blockbuster.

Kinda want to see Neil Patrick Harris as Nemesis.

Fassbender

Abortion bomb or something idunno. Do y'all really still think this shit is gonna happen? Realistically?

, here again, btdubbs, how awesome a punk rock band name right? Abortion Bomb? I'll have 10 tickets.

The only thing I really want to change is the fact that Nemesis didn't tie up the President and the guy's wife. If he did that, he would have had no problems. Figure out a real way for him to be outsmarted, don't just have him make an obvious mistake. I guess the ending explains why he made such a mistake though. And the President probably shouldn't survive having a bomb strapped to his chest detonated. In my experience, that rarely happens.

I still wonder why Millar did not do this already.

SPRINGTIME FOR MILLAR AND MILLARWORLD
WINTER FOR CLICKBAITING MAGS

Probably because at the time the rights were with different people. Kick-Ass was over at Universal and Nemesis got shopped around Fox (originally planned to have Tony Scott direct it) then WB, and I think now Netflix has it.

Since he knew he was going to sell the stuff to different studios he only made barest references to other books, up until the final issue of Kick-Ass 3.

I go crazy with it and base it on the first miniseries and any fucking thing he said about the first miniseries and the planned second miniseries in his interviews.

So all I would know is that first miniseries, and how in the second he planned to reveal that the Nemesis who died was some Steve Jobs knockoff.

Then we go full-on making it more unsubtle than what Millar did. Like, how Ultimates 3 made Ultimates 2 look subtle.

I go and watch Crank, The Room, American Psycho, all of Zack Snyder's films, and study them, all while saying Tarantino's quote "When people ask me if I went to film school I tell them, 'no, I went to films" over and over like a mentally disturbed person.

Then I add what Mark Strong said that Matthew Vaughn told him while filming Kingsman 2 that "No one dies in the Kingsman universe" and apply it to Nemesis.

Then I get the same cast as except I cast multiple actors as Nemesis, and switch them from scene to scene. Like one moment it's Christopher Walken recounting the "origin" to his henchmen. Then right after finishing the origin, it's Ashton Kutcher as Nemesis giving orders to his henchmen, without any explanation. Or when he's driving the car, it's Nicholas Cage as Nemesis, but then when the car changes to a motorcycle, it's Christian Bale, and he's Nemesis all the way up until he gets out of the sewer, and when the police ambush him, it's Tommy Wiseau as Nemesis. Brendan Fraser is Blake Morrow but I make sure he has the haircut that people keep memeing on Sup Forums.

And then I have a whole plan set out:

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NEMESIS: Our first movie basically adapts the miniseries. But with differences. Ever read that issue of Wizard Magazine where Millar said that his original plan was to have Obama be the President and then Millar had Nemesis off him in the first issue, but then his editor told Millar, "No, you can't do this because the Secret Service would come for us"? Well for the opening, the President will be played by Keegan-Michael Key doing an Obama impression, and then right up to the point where Nemesis captured him, then the Key is switched out for Gary Busey for the rest of the film with no explanation. Everybody in the movie just acts like there was no change at all.

Other changes include having Christopher Walken as Nemesis dancing on the outside of the airplane for no reason before attacking, the cars outside the prison combining into a Michael Bay Transformer, and Brendan Fraser having to call in Ultramummy, a Egyptian-Japanese collaboration, to stop the Nemesis Transformer.

Then at the end when the President played by Gary Busey is killed, a new President is sworn in.... and it's Keegan-Michael Key as the New President, but his name is the same as the old President, and this time instead of impersonating Obama, he's impersonating Gary Busey.

And then that sets up Nemesis II....

NEMESIS II: We find out that the Nemesis who died was an actor who pretended to be Steve Jobs (and then we find out it's Ashton Kutcher). We see Ashton Kutcher in the coffin wearing the Nemesis costume, sans mask so that we can see it's obviously him, then when the close the coffin and lower it in, you see that right in front of the mourners is Ashton Kutcher himself, not even in disguise. Other mourners are turning to him and going, "I'm sorry for your loss, Ashton. Ashton was a good man." And then Ashton is going "I know, I'm sorry I died, too, so who's going to be next in line as Nemesis?"

And then we see Keegan-Michael Key as President doing his President stuff when suddenly he's attacked by Nemesis.... who unmasks himself and turns out to be Gary Busey. Keegan-Michael Key gets electrocuted and turned into a skeleton. Gary Busey just changes from his Nemesis costume into his Presidential clothes and just resumes being the President without anyone noticing any difference. However his mistake was he didn't notice the skeleton. The skeleton gets up and escapes. The rest of the movie is Nemesis/Gary Busey fighting Brendan Fraser with money wasted on so much stupid effects and shit. However in this film, Busey loses the fight but is unarrested and remains president.

At the end credits, the escaping skeleton later takes off the skull mask, turning out to be Gary Busey underneath. Nemesis/President Gary Busey isn't aware that skeleton-Busey is alive....

NEMESIS III: PRESIDENT NEMESIS II: If any of the movies do badly, then we continue it direct-to-DVD. And if that does badly, then we do direct-to-Youtube.

Here President Nemesis Busey does crazier Presidential stuff. Canada and Mexico are now the 58th and 59th states of America. Then he paved down a city to make a forest, then burnt and razed the forest to build a city, and then paved down that city to make a forest, etc etc. Then Skeleton Busey appears, wearing a Nemesis costume. Commissioner Brendan Fraser doesn't know what to do until President Keegan-Michael key suddenly walks in without any explanation and shoots both Buseys.

Then the twist ending is President Keegan-Michael Key is also a Nemesis!

NEMESIS IV: It starts where NEMESIS III: PRESIDENT NEMESIS II left off, as Brendan Fraser raises his gun in the air and goes, "By the power of Rian Johnson, I HAVE THE POWER!" and turns into Bren-Dan, with a laser-gun-sword and shoots Nemesis-Key in the head.

Then he flies into space to stop the Nemesis Planet and its Nemesis Factories, which pump out Nemesis after Nemesis. If we have a film budget this may not be a problem, but if we have to go direct-to-DVD, then we pretend that Planet Nemesis is completely covered in darkness to "ironically" create white-costumed Nemesis.

NEMESIS V: Brendan Fraser returns to Earth to realize he arrived right before the events of the first film and wakes up in a hospital. Then he finds out the revelation that everything in the first four movies was all a dream he had while comatose, and that he was an actor and not commissioner.

By this point we may be somewhere between direct-to-DVD and direct-to-Youtube budgeting so now it's "Nemesis on a budget". Brendan Fraser travels to Japan (which is actually greenscreened in) to stop Nemesis from going on a rampage there. This time around Nemesis is played by a guy who can impersonate Christian Bale, Nicholas Cage, Christopher Walken, Ashton Kutcher, etc since we probably can't afford any of them. And we see that this Nemesis isn't very effective since he tries to attack cops but then is beat up and put in prison. Then he tries to escape but is caught, beat up, and thrown back in the slammer.

Fraser keeps acting like this is the same Nemesis that we've seen in the first four films and no one believes him. Then while Nemesis is tied up. He grins, causes explosions, and then kills everyone in the building in hand-to-hand combat like in the comic. But then we see it's all in his mind and he's still tied up. Fraser pulls out his gun and shoots him in the head.

Then Keegan-Michael Key wakes up (and if we can't afford him by this point we'll get some impersonator), shakes the person sleeping next to him, and says he had a nightmare where he was some maniac in a white costume and was also president. the person sleeping next to him moves and turns out to be Gary Busey (or low-budget equivalent if it comes to it) and tells him he had the same dream, and now get back to sleep.

Meanwhile under the bed, Brendan Fraser is whispering to himself, "The President.... is sleeping with HIMSELF?! That's impossible!"

I haven't figured out what Nemesis VI through X should be yet.

A long and elobrate sucide pact with the funds given to me, everybody who greenlit and bankrolled this abomination must die before I take my own life as a blood sacrifice to sully the name forever so it may never reach a human host in this mortal coil.

That or hire seth rogan and kevin hart, they both play the villian, exept I play it 100% strait.

Jesus, this is the greatest disaster I will never get to see, why live

Are the Troma-Studios still active? I want them on special effects.

We're going to cast Martin Shkreli in the role of Nemesis and frame this as a candid camera-style shockumentary where we're pretending that we're making up shit to make Shkreli believe he's actually taking bloody revenge on everybody who ever wronged him.

I think Troma is still around but I can't remember the last thing they did.

This it has to be way over the top

You know, I never thought they had had sex. I felt like the daughter was artifically inseminated with the brother's sperm.