What defines a cake?

What defines a cake?

>Being a woman over 25
>Being a hot MILF yet nips don't want to touch you because "muh shit taste"

These are the things that make a cake, normally.

popping a cherry on top

Unmarried woman over 25. Any other traits typical of cakes are secondary, and are not necessary to fulfill the bare minimum requirements.

Best girl always

milf and cake are diffrent though,cmon son

>sexualizing armpits on anything but lolis

Disgusting.

>milf
>no child
KiLL YouRSeLF

>Over 25
>Virgin with no dating experience
>Latest twitter nigger maymay not even twenty posts in
This is going to be great thread.

>implying a cake needs to be a virgin with no dating experience
purity fags fuck off, she just has to not have kids and be over 25

yeah fan the flames BOI

Isn't it no marriage but she's already 25? BTW are unmarried men also keki in Japan?

Is the term still used in japan?

yeah it is also unmarried, I'm silly for not mentioning that

From what I've seen online, New Years Noodles is the new Christmas Cake, so 31 is the new 25. The idea behind it being that Nips and Orientals in general give eachother Noodles on New Years Eve, because long noodles are supposed to represent a long and happy life.

>31 is the new 25.
Shit, 31 is better anyways 25 is too close to my age to sound old ;-;

I still wonder why we can't have cake harems. Why do they always have to be teens?

Women got 6 more years then, unless they are 31+ already. Does this mean people marry later in Japan?

That's another mans wife.

The picture would be perfect with some armpit stubble.

>attractive woman over the age of 24
>permanently single, usually due to personality defects

See Taiga from Fate

Forgot my pic

>Does this mean people marry later in Japan?
Yeah, that's exactly why Christmas Cake went out of style: women in general marry later due to increased workforce participation. You can already see this in some modern "christmas cake" manga, where the women in general tend to be around 31 years old.

Fertility starts to nosedive after 27 so cakes according to biology should be 27+

It's not like Japs are breeding like third worlders, so decreased fertility and use of fertility drugs should balance out just fine.

who drew this?

...

otochichi, enjoy

thanks

25 or older unmarried NO CHILDREN woman
-may or may not be a virgin, however she DEFINITELY was never married and never had children.

as a result a Cake may be a slut, but she will NEVER be a MILF, TRAP or GILF.

>she just has to not have kids and be over 25
Wrong.
A cake must be unmarried, divorced doesn't count, and over 25.

Ruling is out on the virgin part, but that it probably going to be the case anyway (for example you're not going to call AV stars cakes).

>she has my birth date and age

Are you a cute cake too, user?

>this is what they call a birthday cake?

Holy shit, you are retarded beyond help.

No
;_;

Captcha

>latest
>over 6 months old
Is every dumbass shitposter here trapped in a time capsule?

...

If a woman is over 25 and a virgin and has never been married or had kids it's understandable and attractive.

If a woman is over 25 and not a virgin and has never been married or had kids she comes off as a slut who probably fucks alot and is just on birth control.

When I think of anime cakes I sure don't think of promiscuity.

Why can't cake's win in any harem ever? It's always some shitty teenager.

She's not a cake if she's been married before. Part of being a cake is that she's unclaimed. No man has wanted her for more than some fuck. If she's been married then someone wanted her enough to put a ring on her.

They're cakes for a reason.

But at least 25% of the time it's the cake deciding to just give up and leave.

Just think about how amazing it would be to have a cake harem. Every single one of them desperate to have you put a baby in them so they'll do anything to keep you around.

Who would you have in your cake harem Sup Forums?

...

Shiroe from Log Horizon has 2 cakes in his harem and he does nothing with them.

>attractive 25 years old woman
>virgin

Even in fiction this is impossible to happen.

Thanks for letting us know, nigger.

It happens in Japan cause no one there wants to fuck anymore

One of my friends was a virgin until 23 and she was hot.

Shit.

>I still wonder why we can't have cake harems. Why do they always have to be teens?
You are looking at the Tenchi Muyo multiverse then. The author loves older women with younger men and the age gap had gotten wider over the years.

>>attractive 25 years old woman
>>virgin
>Even in fiction this is impossible to happen.
It is entirely possible for a woman to be hideous in some other way than physical.

Cakes are all shotacons.

Sorry I cut myself on your edge but tell us how you really feel.

You seem rather upset.

I was watching the one on Toonami, GT, I think? It was fun.

no user, thats not whats happening down their despite whatever sensationalist headlines you hear.

that would explain her being unmarried/not in a long term relationship, but she still wouldn't be a virgin user

a miserable piles of lies

Read rule 1, newfag cancer. Lurk for 2 years before posting.

In 2D all women are attractive, some will stay virgin possible due to competition. Go be 3DPD somewhere else.

It could also be like Umeko-sensei from Majikoi, where they could only get to 3rd base before the break-up.

is the last chapter out?

Lots and lots of frosting.

yeah but still untranslated
mom best grill

...

disgusting boobs.

Im dating a cake right now. Shes cute. She says she doesnt even have friends. Shes really nerdy and introverted yet does fine in social outings.

D soon

Are there any flat chested cakes? I need examples for reasons.

do you count lolibaba?

By the time something becomes a meme, it is already old. And shitty.

Unmarried woman over 13

an item of soft sweet food made from a mixture of flour, fat, eggs, sugar, and other ingredients, baked and sometimes iced or decorated.

And here is our literalist post of the night.

I really hate that crappy art
What a crappy cake

ITT: People not knowing what a cake is like always

>they don't know how to catch a cake

so is it JUST anime that is cake?
is everything else milf?

the fuck is the definition?

you need to get out more. plenty of attractive female in real life arent married or are in a relationship beyond 25. be it too strong of a family attachment or the more common unreasonably high standards or prioritizing career, Christmas cakes arent fictional.

no cakes are specifically big boobs and round asses.

...

My first experience with a cake was Nanako in Lucky Star. Was that the originator of this comparison or just a comment on it?

>tfw when me in 6 months
;_;

You missed by far the main issue here: religion. If a chick is even a 5/10, cake age, and a virgin, it's because of religion. Period. No amount of shitty personality or anything will change this. She has to use iron will to fight off the D flying at her from all angles and religion is far and away the reason why she'd do that.

Surely you all realize a single-bagger cannot leave a bar alone if she even sort of gives a signal to a random sadsack. Worst case.

this user gets it

why is that boy wearing a skirt

There's still hope then, after all