I hope you're not playing as an elf, user

I hope you're not playing as an elf, user

I'm that guy that always chooses to play as a human in a game where there are other races to choose from

>picking elves ever

...

There is already a Skyrim thread.

Found the altmer

Nah, Dunmer-fag.

>here's your elf

Why would I when khajiit are one of the best races.

>killed by elves
>couldn't even finish off umaril
>had to come back as a ghost and ask some asshole to do it for him and that person is potentially an elf

This, everyone in my party is human too with the occasional dwarf

>pointy ears
>HAIRY ELF DETECTED

>point metal ears
Geode elves must be purged.

Khajiit aren't mer please stop genociding them Pelinal

Doing God's work, user, keep it up

He didn't even fight against all elves anway. Fuck it, the Alessian Slave Rebellion had even Ayleid nobles among their ranks.

haha deus axe bro

To be fair, Pelinal did basically halve the entire elven population by then.
And Umaril cheated.

You left out the part were
>purged so many wild elves by his own hands the entire race ended up going extinct
>Umaril was such a pussy he sacrificed the last remains of his army just to stop Pelinal, handing humans their conquest of Cyrodiil

>And Umaril cheated
And Pelinal is a time travelling robot with laser beams from the future. They couldn't even find a regular human to do this job.

I don't know about during the rebellion, but a few remaining nobles were allowed to join the human ranks as advisers AFTER men had won

Nah, it seems that was already going on when the rebellion was happening
>Although Ayleid rule over all of Cyrodiil was indeed broken in 1E 243, this was only one of the most obvious stages near the end of a long decline. The first two centuries of the First Era saw increasing strife between the great Ayleid lords of Cyrodiil. Alessia appears to have taken advantage of a period of civil war to launch her uprising. Imperial historians have traditionally attributed her victory to intervention from Skyrim, but it appears that she had at least as much help from rebel Ayleid lords during the siege of White-Gold Tower.
>The Last King of the Ayleids

Genuinely the best elf race in all of fixtion

I actually think this guy is alright as far as elves go. He fights jews and doesnt afraid of anything

>handing humans their conquest of Cyrodiil
temporarily

Could Pelinal beat Corvus aka Elf Doomguy in a fight?

same, even in tabletop
i take great joy out of being a generic soldier
there's something incredibly satisfying about being just some guy, as opposed to being a fancy something.

...

Eh, I would still place Noldor above them.

>boots clipping through the robe

Actually that model is perfect. You're just seeing things

>can't play as an elf in dwarf fortress
>can't breed elves as dorfs in dwarf fortress
why?

No, Todd, look, it's right there

adventure mode

I love being IN a fantasy kind of world with a lot of different or unique species, but only play as a human

It's an illusion spell you little shit

Listen pal, I don't take kindly to people making up obviously fake lies about my games. Go to the store and buy Skyrim for the Switch at full price and MAYBE i'll let you go.

I just want to make an enormous elf breeding facility where I forcefully breed elves to make more elves and then always take a sample of the elves and breed it with dorfs to create the derlf ubermensch

>Tainting the pure dwarven seed with dirty elf genes
If you wanted to breed them as an easy meat supply then maybe that'd make sense but you're talking absolute madness

>Not setting up brothels filled with elves, where the fat uddered fucksows can be used as the pathetic living fleshlight cunts they are.
Their bodies were designed for sex and nothing else. Longer life without visible aging? Fuckmeat stays pretty longer. So many of them are old, implying greater regeneration abilities? They will just get tight again faster and can stand up to rougher abuse.

Every single think about elves points to them being nothing but nature's fleshlights.

I thought pelinalposting was already katana-tier edgy.

Illusion spell, is this why there's two of you? And I don't even have a switch. The only Bethesda game I ever bought was New Vegas, I pirated every single other

>pure dwarven seed
dwarves only become pure after years of suffering or being bred in a factory.

>And I don't even have a switch. The only Bethesda game I ever bought was New Vegas, I pirated every single other
WHAT?

Same I make it a mission to kill elves in games I played
Except Rune Factory 4, i married the Elf

Your games are shit, Toddyboy

I just want to create the superior hybrid
grace, stunning good looks, long life, agility and charisma of elves combined wih the strength, durability, endurance, alcoholism and ingenuity of the dwarves
alternatively the result is approximately human sized mutts that are dumb, feminine faggots with poor motor skills and a stunningly ugly face
I'm alright with either

man, has there ever been a sword fight that was done well in a movie? they all look fake as fuck and horribly choreographed

What was that?

i want to say house of the flying daggers but really the only thing i remember is actual damage being done to the blades when they clash together not so much the choreography itself.

I'm pretty sure I pick dunmer all the time because as a kid I thought Raziel was the coolest thing ever.

your games are SHIT, todd
SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT

Seven Swords, Hero or Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon come to mind, although they are extravagant. Otherwise, Hara-Kiri is a good one if you're a weeb, but there's not much swordfighting in it.

...

Quit associating Templars to your stupid elf hate, user.

Pelinal was literally called the divine crusader, knife ear

>Breton
He'd look down on me for being a rapebaby halfbreed but he'd probably be willing to strike a truce if he heard my opinions of the thalmor

Dunmer are the only acceptable elves.

he was also a gay robot from the future, milk drinker.

You forget Templars are not crusaders. Templars protect, crusaders go off to fight. Plus, any type of fighter can a crusader.

that and the fact that the crusades were financially motivated and the religious aspect was only to get the dumb proles on board.

Can someone give me a quick rundown of this crusader?

only house Redoran bros

whats up with youja
ya'll nwahs don't even drink skooma

Same

Gay knight doesn't like Mer. His butt boy slave gets killed by them and he goes on a homo rampage to genocide Elves. They killed him but he comes back as a gay cyborg ghost from the future.

Ancient hero of Man, said to be a spirit, was already around kicking High Elven ass by the time Alessia got her shit together, becomes the champion of her cause, literally wrecks the Ayleid witch-king, but the fucker comes back because he was just banished to Oblivion or some shit. The Champion (You) have to kick his ass physically and spiritually with this guys armor and mace and the blessing of Talos

Elder Scrolls lore is fucking wacky

Wiped out most of the elf population then died. Also killed a bunch of furries because he thought they were elves.

>Redoran
>not Indoril

it gets more graspable when you realize it's actually science fiction, not fantasy

>killed a bunch of furries because he thought they were elves

I giggle at this everytime I hear about it

Post apocalyptic science fiction

>kill a bunch of furries because he thought they were elves
>hang around with a minotaur and spend 5 minutes as a decapitated head to have last words with it

well there are multiple apocalypses to consider and not all of them occurred during a time when time was linear

>illusion spell
That actually explains a lot.

Let's not forget the race of elves that migrated over from a dying timeline that the redguards ended up committing genocide on so fucking hard that they don't exist in any timeline anymore

>novice acrobatics

Holy shit, I think that is unironically the worst fight scene I have ever seen.

>Indoril
>not Dres
you might as well not be dunmer

i'm playing as a half elf but i'm pretending i'm human because I like the body height more

Fucking Imperiaboo

Dres can't even handle an Argonian Invasion despite being the least invested in Vvardenfell when Red Mountain erupted.

The House of Nerevar and the Hands of Almalexia are far more worthy of the honor of being dunmer then a bunch of lizard fucking degenerates.

>half elf

ILL JUST TAKE HALF YOUR HEAD OFF INSTEAD OF THE WHOLE THING

>bunch of salty farmers
>good anything

>tfw genuinely think Reguards are cool but most people only know them as the token black guys and CURVED SWORDS ROFL xDDDD

Every race is cool and it's perfectly okay to like any of them for a variety of gameplay, aesthetic, and lore reasons. It's just banter. I guess a sword singing nigger wouldn't be able to handle it without getting violent.

House Dres was too busy getting their kwama mines and plantations worked by nigger lizards and cats tho

Anyone who plays or unironically likes Bosmer or Altmer are scum.
TESO only made that more obvious with the Aldmeri Dominion playerbase.

Altmer are actually the best race though. It's not really racist when your race has a +50 magicka bonus.

>It's just banter
Except Pelinal spammers. These make a political stand out of it.

>not liking lore Valenwood
>not liking Wild Hunt, cannibalism and reverse vegetarian

>minmaxers
>not scum

Breton are the worst then?

Well they idealize an autistic robot who spent his free time invading the butt hole of a prepubescent boy, so who fucking cares what they think?

N-No sir, I'm j-just playing as a goblin, minding my own business.

yes, just look at the Reach ffs
damn gay ass half elf fucks
being all like "ooga booga nigga we got magic and hagravens n shiiiet"

They are about on the same scuminess level as Altmer, but yeah.

Elves are for marrying.

As a pelinal spammer, it's 100% banter.

The Bosmer are the most /bro/ teir elves in TES. They don't share the views of the thalmor, and they aren't racist dicks who hate everything and everyone like the edgelord dunmer.

They're just inquisitive, weird little cannibalistic goblins