ITT: Red flags that a piece of software will be shit

ITT: Red flags that a piece of software will be shit

>it's not free

Java required

You somehow missed .

>analblasted java codemonkey

>Every time you launch the software they ask you to donate to them
>The message is accompanied by an image of the devs

>It's made in JavaScript, we used "hybrid technology"

>based on electron

>hosted on github

>it comes pre-installed

>have to download from sourceforge

This.

>fake endorsements from news stations with logos on website

This.
Meh. Slack's pretty good

>artisinal

>eye-raping white background
>no comfy dark theme

>created by or for "code artisans/mavens/ninjas"

the website where it's being pimped doesn't allow comments from the users.

>images on website of hipsters and females "coding"

>"Awesome" "Javascript"

this

>Meh. Slack's pretty good
It's a pretty laggy piece of shit, that what it is Morty. Also on their server site, if you revert back to a lot messages from a lot of people.
And an application like that should be 15mb max.

Not worth mentioning that chatting applications shouldn't have a high typing latency that electron typically introduces.

"minimalistic" UI

>you have to install java
>you have to install Flash player
>made by Apple
>have to download it from a 3rd party website
>need a 3rd party program to launch it for no reason
>the requirements to run it are too high, which probably means it not optimised correctly
>nobody made a review, or the site which contains the software has obvious fake reviews
>forces updates
>forces you to use an Internet connection/connect to a server (obviously communication software is an exception)
>you must register before downloading for no reason other than them to push ads on you
>you must go to an ad infested site prior to downloading (such as adfly)
>has the word "legit" anywhere on it's page, description or inside the program itself
>has built in ads and if you disable them yourself the software no longer works
>is Windows 10

>recommended by Sup Forums

>installer wants to install chrome, pc cleaner, toolbars
>creator tries to force you to pay

>install 3rd party software as your default search engine

Made by chinesemen

>program is basically chrome with a javascript extension for the UI

When they institute their own file explorer GUI instead of the one natively available by the OS.

DELETE THIS

>flat design
>material design
>contributed by freetards

>window before the main window

>made by Apple
CUPS is pretty good.

Well, there are good reasons for doing this.
For example, the folder selection dialog in Windows sucks big time.

What about Minecraft?

>desktop program
>made with HTML/JS/CSS

exactly

/thread

Not only is the game terrible, it is slow as fuck just because of java. The c++ counterpart being made is 5 times faster.

Closed source

It's open source

Closed source, obviously. If the code was not shitty they'd have no problem showing it off

>"Certified by (insert huge tech company here)"

Pretty much guaranteed the certification is fake or meaningless, just trying to trick retards into installing trash.

...

it ends with .exe

>opusenc2.exe

Marketed to gaymers
see discord or any razer software

It has philosophy

...

Node.js and similar shit

>written by a woman

>GPLv3.txt

>it's a windows program

such as:

Open source

There are women/pajeets on the dev team

>Reviews from Jason, Sally and Tom on the webpage

The version people recommended to install is not the current version

>has GUI

Closed source. Usually indicates horrible codebase

Mind if I save that funny meme?

Instead of being listed as compatible with "Linux", it's listed as being compatible with "Ubuntu".

If it's a Go program or library that depends on more external packages than you can count on your hands.

Too many GitHub stars/forks yet just a few contributors.
Badges.
Code of conduct.
Screenshots under Mac OS.
Describes itself as "awesome", "modern", "for humans".

these

splash screen
special snowflake fonts
custom window frame/buttons
custom control elements (checkboxes, dropdowns, etc) or other look&feel mods
GUI that does not model and display the relevant data correctly, is not straightforward or intuitive, is not "smooth" but requires a convoluted order of operations for every process (e.g. repeated, linked checkboxes on individual subitems when it should be a dropdown on the parent item to choose 1 subitem from because you can only pick 1 anyway)
irrelevant photos of grinning people, children, etc everywhere to elicit positive feelings in onlookers, especially on the website or splash screen (this pisses me off so fucking much, people who work in marketing are the cancer of society and should be hanged)
outdated gui concepts (round corners, bezels, gloss effects, trying to make things look like they have a 3d shape like the glass window buttons in win7)
32bit only
engrish
unclear/unexplained(and often unnecessary) abstractions (particularly annoying example is a partitioning tool of which it's not stated if it recognizes gpt or only mbr, and the UI itself neither seems to particularly mention gpt nor throw errors about not recognizing it... motherfucker, do you or do you not work with gpt? you neither say you do nor spaz out about it when I expose you to it)
marketing lies and exaggerations ("this junk file cleaner will make your pc 50% faster", "this screensaver is good for the environment", "this new driver ensures the optimal performance for that new videogame released yesterday")
bundleware (ever tried installing a printer driver? enjoy all the sideloaded junk)
duplicateware or otherwise reinventing the wheel, i.e. software that serves no original purpose but just duplicates existing stuff, like I seriously once saw someone's laptop with windows that came with a systray wifi applet preinstalled that literally just did exactly the same thing as windows' own systray wifi applet...

>Describes itself as "awesome", "modern", "for humans".
basically any attempt at "being hip"

Has an "update checker" that's always running

Laughed loud in public

VIVALDI BTFO

it's good tho

does everything chrome does, but also actually has a decent ui that doesnt look and feel like horseshit, and it exposes a ton more settings

>this

one thing I disagree with is everyone's hate for java. Performance of it is good enough, and it's actually a good idea to use it because anything written properly in java is automatically cross-platform. You just need to install the jre. Why does everybody bitch about the java runtime but not e.g. the 5000 visual c runtimes in windows, the python interpreter needed to run python scripts, etc? Fucking bandwagon morons

If your reason is that most java progrms you've seen are shit, blame the pajeets and other shithead retarded devs. There are good and bad programs in everything

>I want to have to read a dozen manual pages and memorize a bunch of key combos and shit, and then write out long-ass commandlines in the specific jargon and format this one particular tool works with to get any basic task done, even for one-off tasks, instead of a gui that explains itself and all its features, options and data in the blink of an eye, validates/previews/whatever all your input in realtime while you enter it so you can't make mistakes and you can experiment with it, doesn't suffer all those stupid special snowflake nuances that every commandline program ever suffers (like different formats of passing or parsing parameters) and generally has 0 learning curve

The program was made by a women or anyone other than a white male in their 30's or older.

So I guess you're using a text mode browser for everything, using curl to directly http post your posts to Sup Forums.org, viewing all your images like the one you attached as an ascii-art interpretation in your terminal, and your desk has no mouse on it

Classic sign of an autist to whom neet points are more important than actually getting shit done like an adult

It is good, but is the exception to the rule. You will also notice lag on it on a low range machine despite the 1994 level graphics.

you have to download a "download manager" before you can download the actual software you want

Flash, Silverlight or Java is required
Propiertary
Made by Adobe, Apple, Microsoft, Google and other botnets
Flat UI
Download not trough SSL
Ends with .exe
No native GNU/Linux support
Cant select dark/light theme
Does not have a licence
Recommended to download through Softonic or other places like that
Site has 3 big buttons displaying FREE DOWNLOAD when legitimate download button is 3x smaller
Suspicious results through virustotal

These are a just a few

gtk3 dependecy

>no license
you're free to reverse engineer the source code

>being made
and never finished

Though I agree - the java version is garbage. On my home machine it allocates gigs of memory only to then run the world freeze garbage collector, freezing the game for several hundred milliseconds. memory graph looks something like >pic related

where did the kung foo chicken fit anywhere is shrek.

>4kb pr. instance

is this shit real`?

hosted on cnet

>made with java

>poorly translated English
>its icon is slightly pixelated
>fake endorsements and blurbs
>it's literally just a white background with standard text with links and images scattered about
>automatically installs other, unrelated programs

>freemium overdrive: you can download the app, but can't do jack shit with it until you pay for something

Sup Forums, everyone

Nope. There's never a good reason for it. It is always shit. It always looks like shit. It always functions like shit. It will always be shit.

Has a splash screen.

Splash screen is visible for more than a second.

There's no visible feedback/loading bar or anything and the thing takes like a minute to load up completely.

There's a loading bar but it doesn't actually show any progress it's one of those ones that has a bar goes from the left to the right constantly which defeats the entire purpose of a loading bar.

Software uses its own widgets for the titlebar/buttons.

Only available on windows.

Any piece of software that requires gtk on windows is an automatic yellow flag at least.

I got some red flags for you

> ""Offers"" to install other programs and has the checkbox selected by default

> Either contains advertisements as a part of the basic program or installs adware.

Isn't it illegal to make a better minecraft now that it's owned by Microshit?

Just don't name it Minecraft. There are variants on the Windows Store for shit's sake which are very similar but with radically different names.

>inb4 why are you using the windows store
It was an example

Also, the C++ counterpart they mention is made BY Microsoft and is available on aforementioned Windows Store. It is free if you already own Minecraft for the PC.

Can any of these clones connect to regular minecraft servers?

>made by MICROSOFT
Oh, so Loonix users are stuck with the awful java version?

And the only thing that is good from Apple

>doesn't use OS's UI
>checks for updates before starting
>checks for updates automatically
>doesn't start until update check is complete
>hosts ads
>proudly uses anything with "java" in it
>doesn't ask for installation directory
>installs in appdata/home directory
>has/is a self extracting zip.exe
>hosted on a site that "noticed you are using an ad blocker haha"
>program is a "hub"
>designed to do only one task, which does not require external drivers or permissions but still "needs to be installed"
>needs "verification"
all guaranteed trips to either a vm, sandbox, or the fucking trash