Get cs degree

>get cs degree
>still cant program

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>Get a BA in software development, after cs
>Still can't program

>getting into CS to program

>studying computer
Kys's you useless fucking retards

...

Don't worry, you don't actually need to be able to program to make a career in programming.

Just become a project manager :^)

...

...

I think you mean pajeet manager.

>Arts degree in software development

>get a cs degree
>don't like programming

bane?

>get cs degree
>don't like programming
>don't want to program for a living

>love programming
>drop out of Cisco CNET degree because don't want to be used as a slave by corpie gluttons and found the work too easy
>made me want to kill myself because of how easy it was
>thinking about taking cs degree this year
>don't know what to do with my love for programming
Fucking niggers

then go do it, you should be able to get a junior job even without a degree if you have cool projects to show off.
I like programming but don't like it as a job, it's fucking miserable

What companies don't want to hire mindless cattle that will work their asses off and burnout simply for a profit?

sad thing is it's not only the mindless ones they want to exploit

>get a gender studies degree
>still can't get laid

FUCK, my parents money down the shitter

Great, so basically my only option is to fake schizophrenia (runs in the family) and leach off the government or be exploited in hopes of one day exploiting. It's true that only psychopaths make it in this world.

Why don't you launch a start up or go indie game dev

yea you can take this route just don't expect any decent money any time soon

>going to college for anything but healthcare

>implying software development isn't art
philistine

>study CS
>expect to program and learn about how computers work
>instead learn dry abstract math

Fuck STEM desu. No idea how people make through it. It's mental torture. Also I have no idea what is going on in the brains of people who actually find it fun.

why cs and why not a programming degree???

what's a programming degree????

>study physics
>still cant fix an elevator

If you want to be a code monkey, of course you sure as hell don't need math.


sage

>get CS degree
>know everything there is to know about data structures, algorithms, etc...
>know nothing about actual programming
It's like applying to learn about carpentry and only learning about the science of wood. The fact that you can get onto the dean's list and still be a fucking terrible programmer in the end is pretty astonishing.

>thinking CS is about learning to program
you guys know you don't actually need to go to uni right?

>studying CS
>finding programming boring and mundane
I really dont want to be a codemonkey

>Have a BA in CS.
>Only know how to write "Hello World" program.

so now that I've fallen for the programming meme and want out, where do I go next

>Have an AS in Programming and Analysis
>Only good with C++ and SQL, hate Java
>Currently working on BS in IT.

Admittingly I am a bit divided on the whole, do I want to be a technician or a coder.

>be undergrad
>can't program but still got a job
>get cosc degree
>learned to program, make shit ton of money

>ITT: people who got shit degrees from shit universities

This is why I quit that shit :D

Learn powershell.

Stupid easy, most morons havent caught on yet. You can easily script your entire job then learn how to properly program with all your free tiem.

The only person in that group with the qualification to fix an elevator is the engineer.

>took 3 years of Java
>still don't know what the fuck an interface is supposed to do
JUST

retard

>59463088
nigger

Implementing an interface is a guarantee that a class will have the methods in the interface.

That's literally it.

You should have gone into computer engineering.

>Get Msc in CS
>Spend a lot of time learning how to write functional code, how to create complex systems, but also how to write assembly, FPGA designs and routing PCBs. Even lead a team of 20 students for a student competition.

It's been a fucking mountain of hard work, but if you do it like this you end up with an amazing education. Only thing I really feel like I'm missing is mech eng knowledge.

>masters
>qualification

lol!

>no cs degree
>can program quite well
>but can't get hired for good jobs because no cs degree
>no school-leaving qualifications either so path to any degree would be a long and complex one
>all these grads who can't code are being considered before me

then get a degree if you're that good

Are you really that good? If you are then you should have some projects to show off, if you haven't got an education and you have no projects then you're not as good as you think you are. Remember, you don't need to have a vastly complex project to put it on github, a neat program that performs its task well is often good enough.

>Programming doesn't follow the scientific method
>CS classes doesn't follow computing architecture

It's just a fancy word for algorithm classes user

>can program quite well
Then you show people projects you worked on you lying idiot.

This

Real fun doesn't start until you can make a farting machine out of an arduino

CS majors are dorks

>Get computer engineering degree
>Get job offers left and right
>Fast tracked to promotion
>Get awarded a retention bonus and a performance bonus
>Employer fearful of me working with devs from other companies because they're always giving me offers for higher pay
>Get to pick and choose what projects I want
>Offered promotion that goes to most people with at least 10 years at the company within 2 years
>Clients love me so much I work from home 90%.

How have I done?

for starters you elected to not fall for the retarded memes on /sci/, good on you

I want one. I'm seriously considering it, actually. There are quite a few barriers which stand in my way but I could overcome them if I truly dedicated myself.

I currently have some remote-freelance code monkey webdev work. I'm Western and producing solid code but getting pajeet pay.
>that good
I'm not exactly John Carmack, but I've built full-stack commercial webapps which are currently in production and I actively manage/maintain them. I'm writing a software rasterizing 3D engine in my spare time which I'll eventually release.

Despite the above it's very likely that companies will go for graduates instead of people like me and I do understand why.

industry?

>Get certified to work in IT

>Still feel retarded at work

Software engineering.

What retarded memes?

Where are you at? I'm not going out of my way to be mean here, but you need to reconsider if the stuff you have put out is good, or if it is merely working. It's often hard to tell what you're bad at when you're working alone. I've met people who think they are hot shit who were garbage coders, (of course I've met people who thought they were hot shit, who were in fact hot shit). Keep at it, just be critical of your approach and you'll eventually catch a break.

memes about comp sci/eng being "meme-degrees" and the other drivel you hear from retarded nuke freshmen and biologists.

lol all that shit is taught in second year engineering programs

that's pathetic my nig

meanwhile mr shekelstein, owner of university of faggots, is enjoying a nice 20 grand in extra revenue for every retard like yourself that gets shoved through the system.

>We were taught relativity theory in high-school, thus I conclude that all physics majors are retards

t. you

>Being this dumb
user pls

Wasn't my point at all

>Where are you at?
I'm a britbong, if you mean geographically.
>you need to reconsider if the stuff you have put out is good, or if it is merely working
Very good point. To give you an idea, I'll talk specifically about the webapp I built/am currently maintaining. I will admit that it's definitely not optimally designed- it's getting harder to maintain as it scales, there is some code duplication, and there is nowhere near full test coverage. Ideally I would refactor it and build in a lot more automated tests.

However, there have been no security issues and no showstopper bugs in production, I'm always responsive to roll out fixes for minor problems, and there is a rigid manual testing system at staging before anything goes to prod. Overall I think it's a competitive product and the client is happy with it.

Again, I don't claim to be hot shit. I claim to be a competent developer who would bring value to a full-time employer.

Yeah, but it gives a good 4 years to help decide whether we want that shitty job or not. Or to switch to something like business.

because they are pointless. you need to overwrite them anyways, just let the interface out

>get engineering degree
>program instead of engineering

this
what the fuck was I even supposed to use my CE degree for anyways?
All the focus was on programmig, the only subject that was embedded-related was complete shit

>sign up for compsci university
>professor wants us to use a proprietary Windows-only program

dropped out the same day, I won't put up with this bullshit

>First year CS student
>Have been able to program for 10 years
eat shit

>get physics degree
>program better than cs majors
>build circuits better than EE majors
>do math better than math majors
>do statistical analysis better than stat majors
>do philosophy better than philosophy majors
why aren't you majoring in physics, Sup Forums?

>this is what physics students actually believe

good for you, bud

>do multimedia design at uni
>get out of study
>work for myself a year
>year of front-end webdesign of html+css (barely any javascript)
>get hired as a coder by a friend of the family, can't say no, dead broke
>can't program, don't know shit about C++
>everything I do I just make up and/or copypaste/tutorialize from the internet
>nobody says anything about my barely functional code
>get complemented for writing such neat code
>mfw copypasta from github and other sources
>tfw making an actual living pretending to be a coder

Fake it 'till you make it. As long as you can earn a living it doesn't matter.

Ah that meme. Yeah I also get a kick out of the plethora of EE undergrads talking about how they'll be inventing the next computer architecture and how much harder the major is compared to CS... but no one will hire them to do anything outside of circuit analysis and synthesis for fry cook wages with only a BS and a 3.6+ GPA.

.. I wind up interviewing a person that graduated in EE for a junior software position on a monthly basis.

There are plenty of embedded projects out there. They just don't trust you to work on them yet.

>Computer Specialist
>Don't like computers

:^)

>sign up for compsci to learn how to make games
>end up learning about boring shit like sorting algorithms

what the fuck

>Can program super well
>Become a system admin instead because higher salary and rarely do anything serious

>discrete maths degree
>hired for a Java role because I'm competent
>8 months in they have me doing Node.js and no other bank will touch me because I'm out of touch with Java
>obsolete already

If I can already program and want to prove it, is this distance learning degree worth the paper it's printed on?
open.ac.uk/courses/qualifications/q62#course-details
(Just choose any country when it asks)
There is only one mandatory maths module and two completely optional algorithms modules. The rest is stuff like "Software development with Java" and "mobile technologies". It's probably better than nothing but it certainly doesn't look like an equivalent to a real CS degree and seems unlikely to be worth spending 4 years on.

More like
>I had to supplement my physics degree with high school biology in order to get a job.

having sex with highschool students doesn't count as highschool biology

If you can already program and want to prove it, post your shit on github if you're worth a damn.

At least I've had sex you fucking nerd

you say that like it's an insult

jokes on you I'm two years away from wizard powers

Hey fags

I had a career in sales (regional sales manager for an automotive software company) but lost my mind and couldn't talk to people anymore. I then started drinking vodka and doing blow until I ended up in rehab. Just got my first ever degree in Network Engineering while trying to figure out how to not be a complete shut-in my entire life. I'm 40.

How fucked am I?

at the end of the day only learning how to program will make you be able to program
no teacher
no degree
they can help but that's about it

if retirement is a goal start saving a LOT

Maybe you should have actually done your homework. If your university's CS program was even half-decent, you would have had programming assignments. The only way you would have been able to walk out with a degree and no knowledge of how to program whatsoever is if you cheated and had someone else do them all.

runderdated

Hey Faggots,
My name is Bill, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day coding stupid ass Java®. You are everything bad in the world.

Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any pussy? I mean, I guess it’s fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than jerking off to pictures on facebook.

Don’t be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I’m pretty much perfect. I was CEO of Microsoft, and wrote my own BASIC. What software did you write, other than “jack off to naked drawn Japanese people”? I also made billions of dollars, and have a banging hot wife (She just blew me; Shit was SO cash). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.

Pic Related: It’s me and my bitch

My programming experience consists of freelance work and random personal projects, none of which are impressive by themselves. I'm sure an employer isn't interested in trawling through a bunch of boring repos, so you're essentially saying I need to work on large FOSS projects to prove my worth.

That makes some sense but it still seems unlikely that some code on github could be seen as equal to a degree.

Just cut and paste as much as you can from stack exchange and if you have a problem you can't solve isolate the code and make it into an opensource project and get some 13 year old to write it for you.

t. facebook employee

>tfw in electrical engineering but love coding
>appy for few coding student jobs (small pay but still...)
>"lol u electrical engie, shudup feg"
>can't find a side job either way
>not even as a janitor
>"hey bro can you fix my phone?"
>fix few phones for extra cash
>another guy gives me sony xperia z5 with broken lcd
>literally an hour of work
>oops, part of touchscreen doesn't work, must have jammed the cable too hard and bent a pin
>go back and fix it
>now screen doesn't work
>turns out I might have shocked the phone with static
>400$ phone
>no money

remember, if you fuck up in code then you just go back and rewrite it

>"lol u electrical engie, shudup feg"

I fugging hate this. I have a BS in "Electrical and Computer Engineering" and I had so many job interviewers ask me if I even know how to code because they assumed all I know is circuits and shit. There was even one guy who asked me this in the middle of me explaining how I learned Python and Java in high school.

Next job hunt, I'm going with just "Computer Engineering".