Open task manager

>open task manager
>"Wow user, are you hacking?"

"No? Do you not know what task manager is?"

>frogpost
>"Wow OP, are you a faggot?"

>open anime.jpg
>Wow user are you a weaboo or something?

>be me
>buying a coke from the vending machine with my phone via paypass
>security guard tells me to stop hacking it

>open cmd
>"user STOP HACKING!!4"

>open stupid thread on Sup Forums
>"Wow user, are you retarded?"

Source on gif?

something something ladybug

>cd..
>cd ..
>cd code
>cd kode
>ls
>dir kod
>dir kode
>tree
OMG YOU'RE HACKING

It's a Pretty Brazen thing to do, user, to Open a Computer's Task Manager and view the DE-BUG information of the Operational SYS.tem.

>obligatory computer class in university
>know next to nothing about software or coding
>cute girl from my department sitting next to me has no clue what she should do with excel
>open cmd and type cd something something, ping google.com, clean etc.
>she looks at me with a begging face for help
>help her with a distant-to-technology attitude
>get to know her that day
>get laid next month at her place

>she looks at me with a begging face for help
and this is where the lying began

In that moment user, you were her everything. You stepped in for someone to help their sweet daughter in a time of need, and it was all based on a lie. This is why you're now on Sup Forums saying """university""" without a fucking pronoun instead of watching your children grow.

>open up emacs
>"Wow user, are you gay?"

I love taub

nice

Why are you typing like an idiot?

yeah mate. i already knew her from some of my classes, i just had to proceed.
what do you mean by without a pronoun? i'm not from an anglo country.

I had several people ask me if I was hacking the NSA while I was compiling Firefox. Why are people so fucking stupid?

They were just taking the piss because you're such an autist that you compile software in public.

>get laid next month at her place
Sure.

And he wonders why he has no friends.

>lying on the internet

KEk'd

>open up reddit
"Wow user you inow all these funny sites"

MIRACULOUS LADYBUG

>launch tmux session
>run three panes.
>weechat, htop and cmatrix running simultaneously.
>Fuck it. One more pane. I'm gonna run cowsay
>"Wow user, are you hacking?

Does anyone still have the adobe pasta?

>exploiting glibc vulnerability
>logged on ssh as root on remote host
>"Wow user, are you making screenshots for a desktop thread?"

...

> booting linux
> log on using command line
> "damn stop hacking pentagon"

"No? Do you not know what feminine penis is?"

>see roommate looking at my screen
>open cmd
>ping 8.8.8.8 -n 60 for shits and giggles
>"Holy shit user are you hacking the NSA?!"
>"Yeah I'm extracting classified information bit by bit."

>Open terminal
cd code
cd..
cd..
cd..
cd ..
ls
cd code
cd ..
cd

>Entire world thinks I'm koding

you should join our startup

>open cmd terminal
>"wow user are u hacking????"

>women

REEEE MANCHILD VIRGIN!
Women can program just as well as men!

Nonetheless, she has zsh and vcs plugin and git.

>that trashcan next to her computer is supposed to be food

is this what causes numales and nuwomen to be so shit at everything?

lmao

>change terminal to white background black text
>nobody thinks I'm doing any work any more because it's not "hacker colored"

...

>outsourcing tech support not just to pajeets but to fucking mutant ferret things

Someone post the #kodewithkarlie about guy code vs girl code

...

Can someone tell me if the codes on the left and right have different functions or do they mean the same thing?

It's fake, but left is fast inverse square root. Right is a broken max{} function.

The code on the right is a meme
note else if(a > b && b < a)

lies.

Left does a very often used calculation extremely efficiently.
Right is just a joke.

this is triggering me so hard I cant even explain why. not only the fact that my code autism makes me physically hurt looking at this code its also that the tweets at the bottom actually believe the right code is better. I know this is a joke and bait but god fucking damn it the face that anyone on the planet wants code to look like the one on the right makes me incredibly mad for no apparent reason.

>sees "float" in code
>ITS AIRPLANE SOFTWARE
Gets me every time

Is that Paul McCartney by himself?

Just him hanging out with George and John

Back in the day when I still used 2 CRTs as a monitor instead of 1 LCD (ok this was only like 7 years agoish) a parent told me I looked like I could hack the pentagon, just because I had 2 screens.

>starts writing fast on class with my impressive 200 words/m typing skills
>wow the nerd is trying to impress someone

yeah, that and it returns 5 if a equals b

>200 WPM
Wow, you don't even know how to sound remotely realistic in your fantasies.

She clearly has some code on the top window, it's just a hello world, but she isn't lying

>run sudo dnf (or apt) update
"user are you hacking?"

Hacking what? We're in a fucking college psych class, what the fuck would I even "hack"

>200 WPM
Lmao no

>obligatory computer class in university

Don't be idiots. He's clearly a robot.

>open terminal
>start typing commands
>nobody cares

"No user, that does not exist"

Sextape or it didn't happen.

"No, What is a task manager?"

aaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyy

now I'm sad

What the fuck is going on in the left please help. I know it's carmack code but what is a q_r square root?

...

When would you need to get the inverse of a square root?

calculating lighting for muh gaymes

le revolutionary doom meme

>help girl with tech problem
>get laid
yeah found things that didnt happen, 12th july edition
throwing yourself at a girls feet to help with tech problems actually decreases any chance you had with her

But I think its great that you just turned half the future comp sci autists in this thread into those mouth breathing betas

WHO
ARE
YOU
QUOTING

@61333582
dont reply to bait posts

FIZZ

B U Z Z

kill
your
fucking
self
back
to

>activates ad blocker
>"Wow user stop stealing..."

>be only male at work
>constantly get called for tech support
>"wow user you should consider IT"
>tfw don't feel accepted as a male at work

>friend asks me to give his user acc, permanent admin access.
>open cmd to do it.

"YOU ARE NOT GOING TO BE HACKING ON MY PC user"

>realized I was friends with a retard