Sir, you're going to have to decrypt your laptop right now

>Sir, you're going to have to decrypt your laptop right now

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imdb.com/title/tt0113243
arstechnica.com/tech-policy/2017/03/man-jailed-indefinitely-for-refusing-to-decrypt-hard-drives-loses-appeal/
youtube.com/watch?v=ypEN1ay5i78
twitter.com/NSFWRedditImage

AM I BEING DETAINED?

I forgot the key :^)

AM I BEING DETAINED?
I DO NOT CONSENT TO A SEARCH
MY WINDOW IS WOUND ALL THE WAY UP WHICH MEANS I DO NOT CONSENT TO TALKING TO YOU
I AM A SOVEREIGN CITIZEN PLEASE GET AWAY YOU ARE VIOLATING MY RIGHTS
CAN I GO
AM I BEING DETAINED
WHY ARE YOU ACTING SO HOSTILE I AM JUST A SOVEREIGN CITIZEN ENACTING MY GOD GIVEN RIGHTS YOU'RE NOT DETAINING ME SO LET ME GO
I'M GOING TO NEED TO SEE A SEARCH WARRANT

That's not an excuse, you're going to be held in contempt of court and imprisoned until you provide the decryption keys

you get shot for yelling and making the cop feel like his life is in danger.

>Laptop
What do I look like, some normie?

>Inputs wrong key n times
>Laptop deletes all data

>I DO NOT CONSENT
Makes you sound like some whiney feminist, I'd just shoot you anyway

Hidden container?

*drone stealthily appears out of nowhere and shoots the police officer faster than any human can react*

heh... dont touch my human... kiddo...

I can't do that officer
there is sensitive company data on it

I don't encrypt my hard drives since the government requires you to unencrypt them upon search, and if you don't you're held for contempt. You only lose with encryption.

>type in password1234
>let him have a look to my decoy normie OS

Not RCMP and I haven't even been tazed yet.
This is going good so far.

"Just type rm -rf in this terminal program and everything will unlock, sir."

I have a normal notebook how i doing normies shits and a hidden encrypted vm for my power lvl shit, so no problem.

>I refuse
>The officer fires
>holding up my thinkpad it deflects the bullet into the officer's vest
>i take my thinkpad, and lay a single blow against the stunned officer's head
>the skull shatters instantly mincing the officer's brain with their own shards of cranium
>their dying hand reaches for the totem in their pocket, an iPhone, but their false idol shan't save them today
>I close my car door and speed of
>another day, another victim, for i am the holder of the thinkpad.

Oy vey, antisemite.

But u are NEET.

If you were to activate ransomware on it, what would be the next legal step, assuming they don't know you put it on there yourself (i.e. you downloaded the virus knowingly)?

Sir, i have the right do not produce evidence against myself.

STOP RESISTING

BANG BANG BANG

no u

no you don't, i have a warrent

>BANG BANG BANG
Not if i have a gun too. better be jailed than dead.

Nigger, shoot on site.

>implying the blue line will take you alive

Not if i have a gan too. Better jailed than dead.

...

He won't. Because he will be dead.

I'm talking about his buddies. Departments go full ham on cop killers

Not always.

t. cop killer

For defend myself?

Officer, I forgot my password. Even if I want to, I can't access my laptop.
I will have to format the HDD and reinstall Gentoo later this day.

>not having a custom setup that when given a certain key pretends to decrypt but is really booting into a dummy OS on another harddisk while the original remains encrypted and hidden

>"Sure"
>enters password
>cop looks at all my porn
>traps and other shit
>nothing illegal though
>that's it
>who cares

"Could you give me a source on that pissing tranny webm?"

>using the smiley with a carat nose

Kek

...

SIR, STOP RESISTING ARREST
PUT THE WEAPON DOWN
*GUN SHOTS*

[YOU DIED]

lol why is he freaking out over a monitor being taken

Source?

This is a all in one from 90s.

imdb.com/title/tt0113243

Is that actually possible?

Caret

This isnt the UK u noob. 5th amendment protects you from testifying agaisnt yourself or being forced to provide evidence against yourself.

>have 2 disk
>set bios to boot for in normie os
>always in boot time press key to choose the encrypted os
>profit

excuse me, but the proper pronoun to refer to me by is "xir".

Um yes? If the cops get the wrong address and no knock you at 3 am and you kill one you are absolutely fucked.

...

B-but it's not encrypted. All my files just happen to be random noise.

Bootcamp lets you boot into OSX if you don't touch anything and the partition boot menu if you hold down a certain key.

Decrypt? I don't understand what you mean officer?? It's all here?

>mfw LUKS data is not in a partition and does not have a header attached to it
>mfw headers are located on a playable DVD
>mfw the KDF used to get the loopback decryption key for the header file has over 20,000 iterations and takes 20 minutes to run on my airgapped cluster


HAHA LOL GOOD LUCK LOL HAHA

>he really thinks the government gives a shit about your rights
You'll just end up committing suicide with two gunshots to the back of the head.

Right away sir

Good thing I use a Marutukku filesystem.

-Promptly assumes the position-

Are you actually allowed to do this meme?

Officer, I have literally thousands of files encrypted in gpg, each in a trucrypt container, all on an encrypted home directory on a LUKs partition.

My partition tables got fucked up and the cylinder blocks on my HDD are misaligned.


Will LEAs recover my files in a week's time, Sup Forums? Assume they have any user-prompted passwords.

No, they already ruled that passwords don't work like that. They can issue a warrant for your passwords and hold you indefinitely if you don't comply.

>I DO NOT CONSENT TO A SEARCH
>I'M GOING TO NEED TO SEE A SEARCH WARRANT
only valid argument unless if the cop claims 'probable cause' which is so nebulous it could mean anything

the cant compel you to tell them anything, even passwords.

proofs or fake.

They'll get those keys out of you after a day of beatings.

I will exercise my right to not say or do anything without first speaking to a lawyer. You have a right to see my identification and nothing more.

They keys are in my .gpg folder but the names are wrong. Will they know enough match the fingerprint to the file? or will they get confused that that bitUNlocker.exe isn't working?

literally purpose of a Marutukku filesystem.

>enter password
>SSD immediately vaporized by a thermite charge

No if you are in a car, police only need probable cause for cars
Yes if you are in your house, the only time you have to let anybody into your house is with a court ordered search warrant.

>Hey he's got a gun! He's reaching for his gun!
>BANG BANG

I'm white.

Watching videos of sovcits getting owned on youtube is a pleasurable past time of mine.

what if there's no decryption key?

AM I BEING DETAINED, SIR?
>AM I BEING DETAINED, SIR?
AM I BEING DETAINED, SIR?
>AM I BEING DETAINED, SIR?
AM I BEING DETAINED, SIR?
>AM I BEING DETAINED, SIR?

>Be me
>FBI rolls up in the party van
>seizes my computer
>tries to decrypt
>see this
>Police brutality.

arstechnica.com/tech-policy/2017/03/man-jailed-indefinitely-for-refusing-to-decrypt-hard-drives-loses-appeal/

there you go

>But i have no encr....
>feel hown solder heats up in your ass
>feel pain
>KGB officer asks your last time
>ookkk, password id AnimEForLife1488

straight up nazis
>The contempt-of-court order against Rawls was obtained by authorities citing the 1789 All Writs Act. The All Writs Act was the same law the Justice Department asserted in its legal battle with Apple, in which a magistrate judge ordered Apple to produce code to enable the FBI to decrypt the iPhone used by one of two shooters who killed 14 people at a San Bernardino County government building

>pig
Right after you and your kids are laying in the ground dead :)

He shouldn't talk. He needs to get a better lawyer and challenge the legality of this in higher courts.4

I dont care if the hard drive has plans to build and detonate a nuclear bomb, you cant just lock somebody up, indefinitely until they decide to (possibly) incriminate themselves under oath.

Seriously, this is Bolshevik-status stuff. indefinite imprisonment of somebody without being found guilty of a crime.

>2015
this happened during Obama's term.

big surprise.

after so many years tho they can no longer pursue the case due to statute of limitations.

They would have to release him after this term

>PHILADELPHIA (AP) — A U.S. appeals court on Monday rejected a fired police sergeant's stance that he has a Fifth Amendment right not to turn over computer passwords in an investigation.

>Former Philadelphia officer Francis Rawls has been jailed for contempt for 18 months amid his appeal. He has not been charged with a crime.

Im telling you, nazis. They have no respect for the constitution anymore

>mfw Apple still said no

But it doesnt even have a password on it.

The american gov't is basicaly owned by big business tho. The laws are made and interpreted in their favor, not we the people's.

>decrypt
Lmao I'm not a pedophile who has something to hide, dude. Feel free to take a look around, sir. My 4th amendment right isn't being violated.

mine too. They are so clueless and retarded it's almost as satisfying as watching train crash compilations on liveleak.

Lmao, im not a criminal who has something to hide, go ahead and record all of my telephone calls, read all my email before I do, open my mail, monitor my location with GPS and monitor everything I do at every moment using social media, dude.

Feel free to 1984 my life sir, I dont care about the constitution and its overly protective anyways, nobody deserves those rights, my 4th amendment isnt being violated

>do nothing
>get shot by cop
Feels american

Dude is going to headshot with a shotgun from across the map.

>youtube.com/watch?v=ypEN1ay5i78
He should have given his password

>Sure, here you go

All of my files are in the Google bot net cloud

This guy gets it. You'll never be subpoenaed if you don't own your data.

>Decryption Keys are 256 characters of random symbols, letters and numbers
>Can't remember any of them in my head, it would be impossible
>All codes are on a notepad file on a single indiscriminate DVD Disk
>Inside a CD binder of David Bowie ripped dvds
>Inside a Drawer in my house
>The Drawer is set up like how Light set up his Death Note hidden compartment
>If anyone were to find it, and open it without using the safety system, a gas lighter is activated, and burns a homemade napalm solution, instantly destroying any evidence

Your move Mr Lawman. I can't Confess to which I do not know :^)

They will still imprison you, indefinitely without charging you with a crime until you tell the the passwords

I'm not doing a damn thing without my lawyer present. I'm sure he'd LOVE to hear about how you tried coercing me at gunpoint to disclose my passwords. Lawsuits are made of thiiis...
Oh, you're dropping the case against me? Tough shit, I'm still suing you.

I wish I could but these motherfuckers want $300 in bitcoin to do it.