Sir, I'm going to need you to unlock your phone and laptop

>Sir, I'm going to need you to unlock your phone and laptop

Other urls found in this thread:

nytimes.com/2017/02/14/business/border-enforcement-airport-phones.html
elsevier.com/connect/what-are-your-rights-at-airport-screenings-and-checkpoints
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

> unlock
Maybe in GB. They may want you to power it on, seeing the lockscreen in enough for them.
> and laptop
You need to be a really dense faggot to carry a laptop in your hands in an airport.

>nytimes.com/2017/02/14/business/border-enforcement-airport-phones.html

>Mr. Elsharkawi, 34, an American citizen, said in an interview on Monday that officers from the United States Customs and Border Protection repeatedly pressured him to unlock his cellphone so that they could scroll through his contacts, photos, apps and social media accounts.

>He said they threatened to seize the phone if he did not comply.

>Eventually, he relented, and a Homeland Security agent looked through his phone for about 15 minutes, he said.

LAND OF THE FREE

My files are stored encrypted on my server anyway. So I can decrypt my laptop no problem.

Go right ahead

>implying I'm stupid enough to carry a non-wiped phone or laptop with me knowing this scenario is possible

>he doesnt have a server he can ssh into for his files
>he doesn't keep his machines free of files except applications

here's a (((you)))

Get your hands off me you dirty cuban nigger.

They'd just stuff you into a coin locker and not take you out until the airport gets renovated.

Nothing to hide! Nothing to hide!

It's okay, I don't have anything volatile on my devices. Everything I have saved is on a server, to which there's no link, because I've memorized it. When I need to connect to my porn folder full of big fake tit bitches I just open a VPN connection to my server and do whatever I want.

On my phone I'd just save messages to my server and delete everything before going. Naturally I'd delete all social media apps too so fuck you TSA.

It's not very hard, but I see why they do this. Dumb sand niggers don't cover up anything so all the terrorists get caught.

>Sure thing officer, right after you sign this official NDA statement.

>agent sees a clean phone with no apps
>raises suspicions
>notes down IMEI and MAC address of your devices
>now flagged by the NSA and subject to more investigation

My work has offices in Fatistan and UK, and the company is autistic when it comes to guarding trade secrets. It counts as gross negligence if I take my laptop through US border.

Got around it by having a desktop with identical hardware in two countries, and carrying an M.2 SSD with me. They unlock my phone but I don't care about the stupid shit on my facebook.

Here's your NDA

DENIED
ENTRY
STAMP

>and carrying an M.2 SSD with me

hope you have that m.2 ssd shoved way up your ass

WHAT ARE YOU DOING SIR
PLEASE PUT DOWN THAT GUN
SIR

BANG BANG BANG

>buy cheap flip phone
>shove in sim
>travel without trouble

>Elsharkawi
there's your problem

Sir, please calm down.
I just need to verify that Portable Electronic Devices,
brought on US soil belong to you and/or they are functioning correctly

This isn't an erotic roleplay board go back to r/femdom

I worked for airport security for Canada.

The most I ever recall being asked of passengers was to turn on their laptops and nothing else.
OK cool it powers on, please go right ahead.


Everyone was aware it was all just for show, we know the rules are stupid, but we do follow them or our asses get teamed about it.
We tried to get people through with the least hassle, I don't ever recall seeing anyone being pulled aside for further interrogation in my short time there.

>"Sorry sir I do not know my password. I use what's called a password manager to store all my passwords. No sir I cannot unlock my password database as it is secured by a keyfile which I do not have with me"

I'm an Egyptian sandnigger with the 2nd most common mudslime name (i was born in merrica) and I've NEVER been stopped at the airport, not once.
I calmly put my thinkpad running arch on the xray thing with everything else, pass through the scanner and go on my Merry way.

What the fuck is this fear of the TSA that Sup Forums seems to have?

And I'm going to have to ask you to remove yourself from my property, "sir".

>YO, HOL UP CRACkA US CANTZ DIDZ DAT TO AN AFRICAN AMERICAN DAYUM

>O-ok, I apologize mr. Tyrone

Desu it's mainly because a lot of tards are ripping out computer pieces and filling that shit with drugs and then lining the walls with fake shit to get around scanners.
They only really escalate once you start objecting and acting sketchy. I don't get why for some people they think the best way to act around authorities who can ruin your life is to be some smartass.

This. I've never had to do more than power on my laptop.

>mfw had a shit one on one trip and it took two minutes to turn on/off

Absolutely fucking spaghetti

>Carry dumbphone with your sim card in it
>Ship your phone and laptop to your destination before hand
>Get stopped by security faggots
>???
>Profit

It's in my luggage, no one cares about a tiny pcb

just never leave the US.

TSA doesn't need to stop you because NSA already has you on a list

I fly outside of Europe at least once a month and within the UK and Europe twice a month
In most airports, they just ask you to turn it on and that's it

...

is it just because they don't want laptop bombs?

>>Ship your phone and laptop to your destination before hand

>customs opens your package as it enters the US
>FBI knocks at your door an hour later

>"You have randomly been selected for further investigation. Please follow us".

how do you plan to use your laptop then dumbass

>take the cyanide hidden in my fake tooth
nothin personel, police(wo)man
haha get it?
cuz hes a pussy

...

>Sorry sir, you think it's encryption but it's actually /dev/urandom

you can store it online and access it on another machine at your destination or just lie about the keyfile and because they have no way of knowing whether you actually use one

This laptop and phone belong to my company, not me. I'll give you the numbers for our legal, IT and security teams so you can officially request access from the owners.

>proceed to waste their time

I neither own a phone nor a laptop. And before you ask - yes, I am virgin by choice.

>Elsharkawi
>American citizen
sure bud

>You need to be a really dense faggot to carry a laptop in your hands in an airport.
I do this all the time. I don't ever leave the house without my laptop. You would be a fool to trust the luggage people handling your cargo.

Thats rude. We arabs are American immigrants just like you

>wasting THEIR time
>as you try to catch a flight
fucking brilliant m8y

>there are people here who don't wipe their phone / laptop when travelling

"No"

If you're born in a country, you're not an immigrant.

>adblock logo on the right

What would actually happen to me as a person with no social media or phone?

What if my battery doesn't work and I don't have a charger instead planning on buying a solar panel and DC-Dc converter once I arrive?

Neither my phone nor tablet are locked. Knock yourself out.

>Tries to search browser history so he and his buddies can laugh at my choice of porn.
>"What's Firefox Focus user?"
>"It means your done. Give me back my shit and go back to your placebo airline security".

if your parents were here illegally, you need to be sent back with them.

"Sorry, I'm not carrying any electronics."

I flew for the first time last week at a major airport, and I was surprised at how little TSA cared. I had an external hard drive in my carry-on, and they didn't even want to check if it worked.

If you're a citizen, hop the border or gang-rush across the line. They're not going to capture and *deport* an American Citizen once they've processed you criminally (for illegal entry) and determined you ARE a citizen.

>LAND OF THE FREE

Free enough for me to tell the cop I don't have to show him anything without a warrant, and if he breaks the law by forcing something out of me I have a reasonable chance of winning the legal case I'll bring against him.

Turns out that even the president can't just write off the constitution, and the constitution applies to all people inside the U.S. whether they are citizens or not.

>Ctrl+alt+F2
>Login: xguest
>Password:
>xguest@apollyon:~$ id -Z
context=xguest_u:xguest_r:xguest_t:s0:c0
>clear && history -c

Here you go, officer.

This

>DHL tower to location
>Carry on internal HDD
>The looks from that security team
Priceless

They can check for that by popping the back off. They don't need your login credentials for that.

>A hour later

>Later that year...
We, the jury, find former agent Pastrelli guilty on all charges of attempted homicide, dereliction of duty, gross incompetence, and conduct unbecoming an officer.

>Not posting the hansen version

What if your phone and laptop died and you can't power it on

>We apologize for the inconvenience sir, but you'll need to come with us for a moment.

Best shit I've seen in awhile

> he doesn't spoof his IMEI and MAC
Asking for it

Too bad Sup Forums doesn't allow sound

If you were born inside the borders of the US, you're legally an American citizen. Cry about it.

>I have the right to fly on an airplane.
Nigger, get real.
boot off a usb into an encrypted luks partition
>Havnt installed windows yet, sir :3

>and then everyone stood up an clapped
>and then the tsa agent fainted

Im 2nd gen and both my parents have an American nationaliy.
Why? I pay my taxes.

Whats the source movie/show?

Why would I bring anything with that government agents may want to snoop at with me on a plane? Hell, if the Trump administration gets what they want, then we won't even be able to bring any electronics larger than a large smartphone on a plane anyways so it's not like I'd be able to bring my laptop unless I wanted to pay more for checked luggage. Not that I ever plan on flying anyways, driving is cheaper and has less bullshit to put up with.

The Core (2003)

>No you aren't.

I doubt he meant he has the right to fly but that he has the right not to be searched without a warrant

>*boots up*
>Fans whir up like a screaming banshee
>Custom anime bios screen appears
>Still booting
>Finally waifu starts loading
>Graphics hiccup because waifu takes a lot of processing power
>Fans whir even louder, heat is blasting out the side,
>And we have command line
>Waifu is running just fine in the background
>attach throat mike and headset
>'waifu-chan please unlock my computer'
>fans are now as loud as a jet engine
>heat is blasting out the side
>TSA agent says something, can't hear them over the fans
>the waifu's response is finally rendered
>'but sensei...'
> the wall begins to melt from the heat
> 30 minutes of weeb chat later
> computer finally unlocked
> there is no more security line
> everything is on fire

KEK

Fake news.

Well not really. Some states allow "stop and frisk" searches, and airports are considered "border areas" so rights are limited. I dont agree with these policies 100%, but thats tbe way it is right now. If one were to refuse a search, they would be (best case) refused service by the airline.

As per electronics:
>[...] searches of electronic devices fall under the standard for suspicionless property searches at the international border (United States v. Arnold, 2007). Under this position, the government asserts that it can open, access (via login or password), and search through all electronic information stored on travelers' electronic devices. CBP officers may also make copies of the files contained therein or may confiscate the electronic device for further study.
elsevier.com/connect/what-are-your-rights-at-airport-screenings-and-checkpoints

We wouldnt need these policies in a white ethnostate

Get tsa precheck idiot

Every fucking time I get my laptop swabbed. I fly about 8 times a year. What the fuck am I doing? I know it is for drugs since the laptop is around dangerous chemicals constantly and they are never followup questions

this is why you get a travel laptop and phone and leave your usual shit at home
god damn this country, that used to be advice you'd give out for people entering fucking China

I only ever take my credit card and passport when I travel. Buy some cheap clothes, a cheap phone and a cheap laptop if I need one. Costs a lot less than you would think, and no luggage to worry about.

Have fun cracking AES.

DOWN ON THE GROUND FUCKO

>going to need you
are you fucking retarded?
Everytime you make this shit thread you make this incorrect. Are you some kind of butthurt shitskin who got rejected and forced back into his shithole on US border?
kys

>land of the """free"""

AM I BEING DETAINED?
AM I BEING DETAINED?
AM I BEING DETAINED?

>No.
>Sit around for a few hours while you wait for your lawyer to show up
>Re-enter the country despite the bullshit "border exception" because as a citizen of the united states you cannot be barred from entry unless citizenship is revoked
Stop playing into scare tactics.

>turn 360° and walk away

>pop the back off
I take it you havent seen the majority of consumer laptops

>if your parents were here illegally, you need to be sent back with them.
So deport all white people and leave the land for native americans?

Don't forget to plug it in. Battery will only last a couple of minutes.

> the constitution applies to all people inside the U.S. whether they are citizens or not
Lol

Wee took it over, native americans lost.

Now we are the holders of the america and shall try and defend our land from illegal immigrants via Sup Forums posts