Help me pls

>be me in 2010
>do well in education, nerdy, loser
>see the social network in cinemas and become inspired to learn programming
>buy a dumb "teach yourself python" book and find it boring, barely go through it
>2011
>do a non CS stem degree and enjoy the programming in the courses more than the actual subject
>still don't learn anything in my free time
>summer 2013
>buy an O'Reilly Java book and try to make myself go through it while typing all examples and find it incredibly boring
>go through half of the MIT MOOC on intro to CS and enjoy it but still do nothing in my spare time
>know deep down that simply diving in to practical stuff is the only way to learn but have no initiative
>2015 to now
>try to go through multiple O'reilly javascript and CSS and PHP books by typing every example but it is INCREDIBLY BORING and realise I am being retarded
>sporadically go through SICP and find it long winded as fuck
>realise the reason I don't do any programming is because I fucking hate having to google how to do shit and fear of failure in general
>also feel like I have to go through SICP or else I'm doomed to be a code monkey forever
>know that even when I go through SICP I will feel like I have to learn tonnes of other stuff like algorithms and data structures (I don't mean looking them up when necessary)
>if I had just dived the fuck in and experimented with shit in 2010 without going through boring ass books I would have produced lots of shitty code and then less shitty code and then good code
>instead I let myself waste all my free time on the internet - I didn't even have a social life due to being an ugly nerd beta autist loser
>7 years of potential expertise building down the drain and I got a STEM degree but had no interest in it either

How do I get the balls to just do stuff? There are probably ten trillion teenagers who code stuff and make thousands online while I dither and feel guilted in to going through boring SICP?

get a job and learn about the workplace
you can always quit if its not your thing

>I fucking hate having to google how to do shit
You're fucked mate. Do yourself a favor and stop thinking about programming.

OP here.

I feel like a lazy, docile, pathetic little creature hewn for wagecuckery through the school and university system.

I used to get near perfect grades but now I feel prouder for doing the minimum on my degree and getting a 2:1 and also for putting low effort in my jobs.

Maybe a slight exaggeration.

maybe go on a lsd trip or ayahuasca to shock yourself back

Idk you might be a bit older. I never feel like a nasty niggy if I fuck up / need to ask for help. Most of the spaghetti boys are too concerned with helping Asian girls with their shit solutions they procrastinated to come up with while the chad extroverts already slammed that gook snatch after they finished the homework the day it came out

It takes a certain mindset and way of thinking to be a good coder. Some people just don't have it. I'm one of those people. I'd like nothing more than to sit on my ass at home, writing code and getting paid for it, but reality isn't kind. I could become a coder, but if I insisted on walking that path, I'd never be a good coder, I'd be spewing out spaghetti code and people would hate me. Why contribute to the problem when I know that I'm not suitable for the role?

...

Don't listen to this "coder" homo I don't even need to finish reading his post to tell he's a goofy

Actual programmer here who got hired after 1.5 years of applying and will be fired soon cuz I suck,


Books are kind of worthless. For the basics (variables, functions, classes, structures like arrays, etc...), it's all on YouTube. Once you've got that down. It's time to dive into real code written by real engineers on GitHub. Fork some open source projects, get them running locally, study the code, find out what it's doing (use google, read docs, youtube...) and why it was written that way (meaning learn about the design pattern of the language. For example, if you're looking at React code, you'll see the code organized into containers and components), then fix issues/add stuff like new features or documentation.

You'll only get good by trying stuff and hammering through it

This. People are NOT created equal. Some people's brains are suitable for coding, they enjoy solving problems and doing math (how the fuck can someone enjoy doing math?). If you aren't one of those people and try to brute force a coding career, you will still be just as miserable as you were when you were jobless, though you'll at least have some money, until you get fired for being a shit coder.

Honestly same here, trying to get through the book CODE right now.

Actual programmer here who got hired after 1.5 years of applying and will be fired soon cuz I suck,

My experience is that, yeah, those people with the good spatial reasoning brains have a great advantage when it comes to programming. They have an easier time breaking down the complexity of a problem. They're able to take in a giant cluster fuck and somehow translate it into a neat drawing, then write bug free code for it in a few hours. It's unreal.

Just to keep up, the rest of us have to live, like, perfect lives so that our brains are as sharp as they can be.

... and as you can imagine, very little people are able to live perfect lives. Pretty much, if you've got just one personality flaw, it's gonna catch up to you and crush you.

all you need to know is stuff like:

define int
x = x + 1
if then
print

maybe how to define and call a function if you are really sophisticated

congrats! you are now a programmer! start by making a text adventure or something, its a classical first application for many. as you said, after you know the basis its all about working on practical stuff.

>I fucking hate having to google how to do shit
as a programmer you constantly google the stuff you want to do. its bread and butter work of any programmer. literally enter stuff like "check NULL vs empty string" "javascript" in google, an a nice selection of depth stackoverflow pages comes up.

> fear of failure in general
programming is a constant cycle of thinking something up, trying it, seeing it doesn't work, fixing the mistakes.

the problem though is that i have to tell you that. normal people figure all of this out by themselves when they are 14 years old.

Nigger, if it were that easy, it wouldn't be called computer science. Learning a language is easy as ABCs but implementing different data structures and algorithms and carrying it over to a real paradigm is precisely why it's an entire topic in university and graduate school. Not every programmer is a retarded front end dev, now more than ever, full stack developers are wanted so you HAVE to be versatile, even with brainlet languages like Rails, Python and JSON, and the problem is that the big meme words change every couple of years: the blockchain, deep learning, big data, IoT of the now will NOT be the same in a decade, and you WILL LOSE YOUR JOB. CS in industry is NOT worth it, period. If you want to do something real in CS that won't be swallowed up in the next big trend, you go into academia, there's no other way.

I do support because it means I don't have to code but I still get paid a lot because I have to understand the inner workings of a large complex product. I thought that enterprise level developers and admins would be smart but they're all just monkeybrained morons struggling to not get fired

Bump

It's because you're still inexperienced enough that you have no conception of function of certain things. It's like how math is boring to kids when it's taught to them straight up, but if you teach them physics or drafting first they might understand the utility of it better, and things like algebra and calculus become more intuitive when you understand it's solving for missing pieces and calculating rates, which is applicable when you want to figure the size of something or solve a basic moving problem.

My recommendation is to just dive into it. If you know java try making a website where people can make an account and keep a "library" for books. Simple, but perhaps you will feel more motivated once you're done and you understand the usefulness of certain things once you've actually had to use them to solve problems. You can use spring boot or w/e, I think that's the new standard. There is conceptual stuff to learn when making a website but you'll learn it as you go

No you wont.

>, full stack developers are wanted so you HAVE to be versatile

Are you retarded? Full stack is like 80% java + javascript + frontend (html, css, etc). rest is javascript full stack (node, javascript, front end). There's basically nothing else. At most node might grow a bit more but java backends will be around because old and large companies are entrenched and/or need something more powerful than node for services beyond I/O. In fact, I'd say Java fullstack is so stable if you learn it you'll probably be okay for the next 2 decades with a little bit of continued learning, which larger companies will give you time for since they play loose with management as long as you meet deadlines, many will even offer you internal courses.

It sounds like you like the idea of programming more than actually doing it. In my case, I enjoy programming, but pretty much only when it's to solve a problem for myself. General studying and example problems don't keep me very motivated; I need an actual, practical issue to resolve.

In short, you need a real reason to program. Just the idea of being a programmer and earning money apparently isn't enough to sustain your interest. What sorts of issues in your daily life can you fix with the knowledge?

It sounds like you were always destined for an internship or bootcamp but got meme'd hard into chasing degrees and academic textbooks that you weren't wired to appreciate. And rather than attempt to get into practical side of the industry you made up for your years of stasis and underachievement with undeserved arrogance about not wanting to be a code monkey.

You don't need balls to do stuff. You need someone to step on your balls and tell you what to do at this point, and you get it from some school you pay to attend.

do what i did and just give up

>and you WON'T get it from some school you pay to attend.

fixed

>>R9k