Intel CES keynote thread

CES 2018 Keynote by Intel’s CEO, Brian Krzanich

youtube.com/watch?v=RlJ9zB74G_U

experience the power of databreach

It's live

um

What the fuck is going on

buy intel goyim we have this shit

Fuck Intel and Fuck Jewish People

It's a mesmerizing performance to distract from the fact intel works for spy agencies and governments while fucking over everyone else.

Who is Intel's target demo with this shit

And do they expect people not to be skeptical?

It's distracting the fact Intel has absolutely nothing to show.
Not even the fucking roadmaps.

Literally random people who barely knows who Intel is.

Why would I want to listen to humans playing live at a concert when I could watch digital avatars playing digital music like I can get at home?

Damn I wonder how much that drummer gets paid

I want that job

THIS IS HOW INTEL DISTRACTS YOU FROM MELTDOWN AND SPECTRE

>amd announces they are launching 7nm chips next year
>meanwhile at intel

Well, their most interesting current product (KBL-G) was created from AMD having mercy on them.
Poor Intel.

damn this looks so nice I want to buy 20 8700Ks

now they are using pizzagate traffic victims to distract

Literally no one cares about this song dance shit.

yo I have this milkdrop preset

>current state of Intlel

fucking narutards in public

you're not a 80 IQ tech journalist working for some random blogsite

The retards this is for are dancing in their seats

COME ON BRIAN, GIVE ME SOME GOOD FUCKING NEWS.

>dancing in their seats
don't encourage them

meltdown then the spectre

>already on damage control about Meltdown
Fucking lmao.

Is Brian the quintessential beta male?

any stream outside jewtube? perhaps one i can use with an external player?
thank ya kindly

...

Literally down to his movements.
Just compare his to chad-Jensen or mommy Su.

mpv+ytdl/streamlink

If he says "data" one more time I'm switching to AMD.

I think he's overstating the fact not all data is worth preserving, at least in its original distilled form (i.e. outside of a trend).

shitty data art

i meant besides jewtube...

Dude it's literally a filler keynote because Intel has nothing to show.
Not even the Cannonlake (unless they have balls to admit the 2+0 abortion).

>There was one time where data was very carefully shared
AHAHAHAHAHA

>hey guys look: space

this stream so bitstarved, of all the company's to have a shit streaming setup it really shouldn't be intel, just pathetic.

Intel servers are in Meltdown

life force data is the future

so intel is releasing HMD's that dumb our brains to the cloud?

FUCKING HELL, MORE VR MEMES

But where are the products?

they are harvesting palestinian souls to put ghosts in the cloud

data IS the product!

:D! buy 8700ks thanks for coming

...

BUY OPTANE :^)

intel created minecraft jesus christ we're living now

>INTEL TRUE VIEW
Post the pic.
You know which one.

yes but Brian... WHO FUCKING CARES

new meme, voxel

LMAO

>meme

this is literally nothing

all of this tech has been around. Kinect could do this.

EA will get in on this, mark my words.

OY VEY MORE ENTERTAINING

We have also partnered with Dolby Atmos™

...

>open stream
>sports
What?

This is so stupid. Shoulda licensed trueVR with all the porn companies to get a cut. Accurate 3d models of vaginas.

*not paid or being held at gunpoint

intel is a camera company now

>there are literal teams of people working on bringing the best possible shot to the viewer
>intel says fuck you do it yourself

>Intel Sports
the fuck

>esports
>athletes

currently watching at 2x speed to catch up to the live feed

Is this how a rotten dying supergiant looks?

>watch starcraft 2 on twitch

wew what the fuck are they advertising

recap:
>space
>data
>vr
>data
>cameras
>vr
>sports
>vr
>data
>esports

at least it's actual sports rather than esports

nothing interesting don't bother

THAT'S A LONG NECK

>nfl

I wonder who's behind intels funding.

wow I totally relate to Chuck

Fat american who likes sportsball btw

S P O R T S

Imagine being a huge fucking tech company and your CES presentation is about fucking low IQ retard sports watching.

shiefs vs sharshers

>video stuttering
FUCKING LMAO

At least in esports vr actually makes sense. You can pick any camera position you want or walk along with the creeps in dota.
In this case you can just pick from a few positions where cameras are places.

Why don't they show actual fucking products?
Literally every second of this shit makes me appreciate AMD or QC approach to keynotes even more.

fantasy football VR TECHNOLOGY

the future is fucking here.

Intel is demolishing the competition like nvidia who talked about AI :^)

>MUH SPORTS

>self driving cars
>innovation

nah, fantasy football VR and how we can watch sports

>let's load a whole bunch of shit at one time so you can look at a small part of it
>fantasy shitball in VR
>video stuttering
>unidentified gaymen PC

t-thanks intlel

now, you can be, a sperm and see what its like to be in tom brady's nutsack

>Intel usb powered 7.1 surround air conditioners/space heaters
Shit they're immersing me

intel lost the auto race to nvidia since GPU is more important than CPU there.

>unidentified gaymen PC
if i recall only asus had that ugly owl eye design

I love watching sports, will my team win or lose and what huge effect that has on my life.

it's just to cater to average normie chads

I know. This presentation is pathetic. Like some schlomo retards talking about how to improve the blockbuster experience.

By the time normies get VR there will be better things to do with it than roleplay as a fucking NFL QB

you do have to appeal to normies to gain money. that's why netflix is still doing so well

Average normie chads don't watch fucking CES keynotes.

voxel tech in security cameras

netflix isn't a tech company and isn't doing sports.

This is just a filler presentation because they have nothing.

"this allowed jew as a viewer"
this dude really pronounces weird

Too much bandwidth/data/etc for it to be practical right now. Higher definition and AI is more important than reproducible arbitrary shots.

nice we're back to data

>Shitball in VR
>Intel Sports
What the fuck I'm watching?
Where are the Tech Gadgets?