1. your country and region

1. your country and region
2. worst job you've ever had
3. funniest story from your working life as a wage slave

One time i fucked off for the entire day from work and no one noticed and i still got paid at some shit wagecuck job

1. Canada, Ontario
2. Greek Restaurant (Only Job I ever had)
3. Everyday some fat lady on a scooter buys a hamburger from me.

where is ur restaurant senpai

im come to your restaurant and make a fucking mess and jump on the tables and shit and break everything and throw it at the employees working and then run away fuck you

>You'll never find me

> NSW central coast
> installing home insulation, banging my head and cutting myself in hot cramped fucking rooves
> watching a coworker lose his mind when there was a children's python in a roof

pls tell me

i will literally do it, it'll be funny as fuck

>California central coast

>work at Starbucks in grocery store chain
>this exists even though there is an actual Starbucks next door
>murrica
>management so incompetent that the only supervisor quit
>only have 4 employees trained to do this job
>nothing is restocked because there is no supervisor to order it
>work schedule becomes democratic because no one is assigning shifts
>management doesn't know how to fix situation because no one will take the job
>end up clocking in and doing nothing, still getting wage
>start telling customers to just go next door
>quit after 3 months

1.southern russia
2. Have never worked
3. Realised that getting a job=being slave

Nice Try FBI

I worked at a wharf on Boston harbor and one day I drove a forklift into the ocean.

No really.

Did I mention it was the dead of winter and the harbor was fucking solid ice? Shit hurt.

>job
>ever had

Haha, I wish.

t. 19 year old loser who has never been employed.

10/10 story

I tried to come up with a funny story but then I just got depressed.

People are violent and terrible and I hope one day the world is a better place.

1. Stralia, South Stralia
2. Security installer
3. Getting put second in charge of my work group in vehicle manufacturing for a few days. I was there for 6 months and I got to order around a bunch of grumpy middle aged guys who had been there for 15-20 years like a drill seargeant and they all hated me. Shit was cash.

>door-to-door salesman where my wage was almost 100% based on how much I sold
>tfw I had to sell a product that almost no one needed, so I quit fast

funny story? I dunno..
My recent job is in the construction industry. The poles who work with us are a crazy bunch. We caught one trying to steal a large garbage bag full of toilet rolls. He lost his job. Probably not worth it...

>southern russia
>Have never worked

I always knew you're lazy niggers even worse than hohols.

1) Flags
2) I'm a rising second-year in College, and have a job shelving books for $11.60/hour at one of the libraries. Pays decently and doesn't require much social interaction, so pretty decent.

My friend had to do that kind of work in the middle of the summer while dressed like a Mormon. He was kinda chubby too so it looked like he just did the ice bucket challenge everytime I seen him.

1. south korea
2. soldier for 2 years
3. my first monthly pay is under $75.

it's legal cuz best korea still prepare to war.
fucking north cousin...

>1. your country and region
Canada, southern ontario

>2. worst job you've ever had
galvanizing plant. This shit was something out of nightmares. No ventilation in the plant, 800 degree zinc bath made the place extremely hot (but winters were something unimaginable tortuous) and poisonous, chromic acid everywhere too. Not to mention all the heavy lifting...fuck I was desperate for money.

>3. funniest story from your working life as a wage slave
well during my high school part time job we had a guy call me constantly telling me he's gonna "rape my ass and bomb me" so we had cops on standby for months lol

3) As for funny story, the closest thing I can think of is being hired. As the first job interview I ever had, I was really nervous about my performance before the manager saw my test results and hired me on the spot. One of my proudest moments tbqh.

>my first monthly pay is under $75.
How is that even possible? You get around 1800-2000 here as an enlisted private.

Australia, north of sydney in the best possible place to live.
Worked in a very busy and popular restaurant as a cook
No funny stories because it was constant hell, I contemplated driving my car into a wall almost everyday to work so that's kind of funny.

1. USA Illinois
2. Tutoring students in an inner city
3. Nothing specific, but it led to an intense hatred of retarded black people. 95% of them are lost causes.

1. Flag
2. Maintenance at recreation centre (YMCA)
3. Some kids vomited after eating bad chips, had to clean up the whole mess

Another time there were these teens that fought and it got bloody. I had to break it up, and call ambulance

every korean men need to Military service.
its the FUCKING LAW.
and end to Military service, then need to Military Mobilization training for 6 years.

inner sydney
cleaning bedrooms at a pub on weekends

it was mostly backpackers that went through so the rooms would be full of fucking used condoms, mind you i was doing this when I was 15 and i kept getting hit on

Are you sure such conditions are legal in Canada? Sounds like something out of China, 2bh.


Yeah, I feel somewhat sorry for them, but then again, you are ultimately the driver of your own education.

Yikes

You have lodging at pubs?

Yep, quite common in Sydney for pubs to be 2 stories and have all the rooms on the second floor be rented out to backpackers or temp workers in the area.

>Are you sure such conditions are legal in Canada? Sounds like something out of China, 2bh.
Of course they're not. Inspectors come and they get a 15k cheque to stfu every year. No one is gonna report this shit because half the town's crackheads work there to make a living. In the end, you might think it's awful but to get hired you literally show up and get a job instantly. So it's sort of a necessary evil.

They got unionized about a year ago, wonder how it's doing now tbqf.

Oh, and the best part was they paid you off if you got injured at work. If you wanted to report an injury, you basically would get completely fucked over because it would effect everyone else's pay and youre on the sure path of getting your shit kicked in. Like you said, China tier.

1)Flag
2)NEET
3)Crying wagecucks

>rape my ass and bomb me
At my work my Bangladeshi coworker constantly poked my bum and was just a very weird person. I'm pretty sure he as joking but when he looks like pic related it's kind of uncomfortable.

how did that even happen

needless to say, it was an indian guy calling from some sort of voip service

They have a signature creepy tone.

he wants that ass whitey

Accidentally backed it over the edge of a dock m8

Shit was anything but cash.

I am 20 and never had one too.

Was close to getting one last week, but they asked for references at the end and the only one I could give were some old shit I volunteered for in highschool and whoever I volunteered for probably doesn't remember me. If the guy contacts them he'll just be greeted with "WHO?"

desu you can use me as a reference and i'll pretend i've worked with you.

Sounds like you're just a shitty teacher who couldn't do anything to help your students.

22 here and never had one.

They do all seem to have that weird unaware personality I find. It's hard to describe.
But the other Bangladeshi and the one Indian that worked at my restaurant were total bros though. Granted both were a bit weird by western standards but they were a good laugh.

>Jersey
>Pizza Express

First job when I was 15 - I worked night shifts because it was busy, which meant continuous work shifting trays, loading the main oven and moving stock. It was hard but the easy day shifts bored me out of my mind. The only non Polish employee aside from the manager who is unironically called Mario.

>all big Polish guys and ex military
>qt Polish waitresses
>never allowed breaks
>had 5-10mins to eat lunch/dinner depending on shifts, if it was busy you didn't eat
>I did 12 hours but some of those cunts were doing 14-16

Worst job I ever had, but the best people.

>one guy who sang all the time even though he was terrible and everyone knew it, but was always entertaining
>one waitress always wore tight pants and we would just watch her bend over cleaning the tables from our counter
>supervisor always gave me shots of vodka under the counter - said it helps get through the day and makes the girls prettier

One of the waitresses came up one day to give an order, says something to me (can't remember) and supervisor leans in
>"You think he's good looking yeah? he's a good guy" (directed at me)
>"sure, maybe, its none of your business"
>"he's half your age you know"
>"[polish curse], he's not"
>"You're 29 right? He's 15"

She looked a little shocked and walked back to go to customers, then my supervisor turned and said "don't worry, she still wants to sleep with you"

And that's how just before my 16th birthday I lost my virginity to a Polish woman with a big ass and tight waist 14 years older than me

>And that's how just before my 16th birthday I lost my virginity to a Polish woman with a big ass and tight waist 14 years older than me
Lucky fuck.

I will give a story from my time at the grocery Starbucks.

>literal ogre walks in
>6'5" / 2m tall
>at least 300lbs / 136kg
>Monster energy shirt
>black hat with flames on the sides
>wearing swimming trunks and swim goggles indoors
>it approaches the counter and exposes its teeth
>every single tooth is crooked or in some way fucked up
>"gibme thuh zambl. they know."
>holy shit what the fuck
>fill a sample cup with coffee
>"i lovb that whipp crem. giv me the strawberry"
>we have literally never carried strawberry whipped cream
>dump disgusting raspberry sweetener into it and hand it to him
>he drinks the cup of scalding liquid in less than two seconds
>"at home i sleep on the groun. it's comfier."
>he leaves

Unlucky in another way because I'll probably never get a lay as good ever again. Peaked at the beginning

Better than being a Virgin.

Irish girls are pretty cute though, so many redheads

>tfw you will never have a qt3.14 ginger Irish gf with a cute accent

Wrong, that is a fantasy. Red heads are are in Ireland and tend to be ugly, Irish women tend to be ugly and cuntish.
If you do meet a good looking nice girl here you marry that bitch straight away.
Most Irish women are like British women but have an Irish accent.

Think about it this way, I would imagine every aussie girl is a blonde busty chick who loves the outdoors and has a cute accent but I doubt that is true now is it?

Rare in Ireland*

10% of redheads are stunners and the rest are all 3/10 or worse. Anyone from the UK will tell you the same

The Aussie accent is never cute.

>Mexico, Mexico Valley
>barman/waiter at some hipstery cafe
>i almost got stabbed by some cholo but got saved by the fact i served them 2 days earlier
They even gave me a $200 tip but they later realized they dodnt had money to pay so they untipped me

It was fun tho, i always kept my tips and even got to meet a junkie hoe and the manager always gave us free beer after the shift ended

Right now im working for the biggest bank in mexico as a customer service assistant telemarketer, i want to kill myself

exact same here

just had an interview recently though that went decent

And theres fuck all redheads to begin with.
A qt redhead tends to sadly dye their hair.

Well there you go but that is the fantasy, we all watch home and away and think Australia is the land of cute surfer blondes.

1. USA, California

2. Working as a stocker/cashier in a 24/7 store. Had to deal with lots of niggers, sketchy people and douchebag chads.

3. My manger chased some nigger who stole wine and they like some fucking duel in the parking lot. The whole store froze while you could hear them screaming. My manager "won" with a small fucking box cutter, heh. It was funny at the time.

Did they ask why you never worked before? I am kinda worried about that.
I never had an official job but worked on a farm and shit.

I have never laughed harder in my life.

What the fug? Was he like a real life American Bear?

Im 20, have a minor in management, had 2 jobs and been trough three internships

>tfw no gf
>tfw not in uni
B-but at least i have a better CV r-right?

Can be t bh but aussie and kiwi girls are the same as brit - just act too masculine. Euros are much better

I have volunteering work and a pretend retail job on there

Maybe it's just cause I've been exposed to it for so long that it's almost irritating.

Think I may be fucked but my friend told me he would get me a job once I graduate.

>Malaysia, Sarawak
>Macca wagecuck
>Get into fight with mainlander Chink with family because he unreasonable demands.
>I win because he attack me first
>although I quit the job on my own few weeks later.
Seriously, do not have business with mainlander chinks.

>MMXVI
>accepting military draft laws
lol kys

Nah, I've noticed it since I was young. Anglo girls are the best girl mates, because they're practically guys. But for the same reason they often make terrible girlfriends

Moscow
Courier
When I have to deliver stuff to Golyanovo, I feel so bad. It's usually far from the next metro station (and I have no car), the sky is always gray, the atmosphere is depressive, and the customers are assholes. I had to explain for thirty minutes to one dude why his Parker costs higher than in the rest of the shops.

I actually feel bad for you, no joke. Sorry to hear that, russianbro.

>Netherlands
>Worst job: have had only two jobs, working in the library was best, working in the mail room was worse, but not bad
>Funniest work story: one day a man asked me if we had "The Panini Mystery" instead of "The Bernini Mystery [Angels & Demons]"

>we all watch home and away
What the fuck. That show airs outside of Australia?

Interesting.

Huh, sounds like America from the 1850s through the 1930s, 2bh.

Dude Home and away and Neighbours are super fucking popular in Ireland and maybe the UK too but Home and Away has a cult following her in Ireland, my 32 year old brother will not miss an episode.

I only got my first job (as a book shelver for a library at my College) a year ago at 18, so you're still okay right now.

>work in retail for a chain of large department stores
>on the tils
>hasidic jew brings toy boat to counter
>ring it up and give usual pleasantries
>thatll be £39.99
>he pulls a face making a ooh noise
>"how about i give you £15"
>"the price is £39.99 "
>"yeh but lets make a deal"
>"sorry m8 i cant do that, thats £39.99"
>"ok ok ill pay £20"
>holding line up at this point so supervisor comes over
>explain situation then jew says very loudly
>"£25 No more no less"
>supervisor then talks to this fella for a half hour about company policy
>finally jew get angry
>"ALL YOUR STUFF IS CRAP ANYWAYS"
>storms of muttering something
>later on laugh about it with coworkers
>almost get suspended because i made an antisemitic joke about it

>said it helps get through the day and makes the girls prettier

thats true a good "grzdylek" can keep you going for some extra time

Assembled spare parts for big chains
Worked 35h/week, pretty physical and exhausting

Was paid only 200€ for 4 weeks of intensive labour and more than 3000 parts build

>be me
>be 29
>never had job in whole life
kek'd

1. USA
2. Used youthful underage looking body and cammed for money
3. Had wine bottle in background. Had to fuck myself with neck of a winebottle. Ass was always sore, but the rent was paid.

What do you even do?

what do you sell?

I don't do it anymore. I quit over a decade ago.

study and go to europe to study sometimes

How rich is your senpai, senpai?

The Australian government pays you 10k each time you want to go overseas to study. It's called 'OS-HELP'.

1. Flag and Scania.
2. I haven't had a job yet.
3. If I don't find one by next month I have to kill myself.

what did you sell?

>and makes the girls prettier

Jag säljer gasol och gasoltillbehör.

Whats so funny

>installing home insulation
I reckon I knocked a good 5 years off my life with that shit doing it for a couple of weeks.

>38-40C, crawling around on scaffolding 10m up
>putting it into a drop ceiling
>even through the biohazard suit
>itching
>dehydration
>more itching
>how much am I getting paid?
>reeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
>ITCHING!

>vehicle manufacturing
i'm sorry, user

1. USA, America
2. Renaissance Faire Character
3. I had to jack off the King's horses each morning at dawn and I only got a 25 minute lunch in the middle of the day

>Los Angeles California
>work at juice bar in a rich white area
>weekends it's super busy, lines out the door, customers wait half an hour for their god damn smoothies and acai bowls
>working the register one Saturday
>this fucker in all Adidas gear and covered in tattoos walks up
>"Hello how can I help you?"
>not looking as I ask
>fucker replies with a British accent
>Look at his face for the first time
>It's David Beckham
>Fucker proceeds to order 5 complex acai bowls
>these things take like 5 minutes each to make if not prepare previously
>he wants a unique one for each member of his family
>single handedly holds up the entire store for 20 minutes
>doesn't tip
I fucking hate David Beckham

It was alright, just a bunch of light labour with some machinery work, nothing hard, mainly time management while working. Could have been doing worse for nearly $35 an hour

Not the worst job I've ever had though, the worst one was an "alkaline water" store, it sold water with a basic pH and was all about "aligning one's chakras. I study chemisty and it was all total bullshit, they had posters saying lemons weren't acidic. But I'd do almost anything for some money.

I didn't mean that it's bad work, just that they're outsourcing all of it.

I did it for about 6 months, it's hard to explain to people what it feels like to be somewhere between uncomfortable and in pain from the moment you wake up till the moment you fall asleep. Plus all of the blokes that worked there were depressing cunts, especially the guys who had been there for years. They just used to talk about depressing shit all day every day.

I reckon I am a morning person too, but 0630 starts can go fuck themselves.

That's gotta suck 2bh

I'm still a student but I live on a farm so I guess shoveling shit is the "shittiest" job I ever had.

One time I stopped one of the depresso brothers from falling 3 metres off a ladder through a pane of glass, he didn't even say thank you...