Yoga Hosers trailer from Kevin Smith starring Johnny Depp

youtube.com/watch?v=3VsG1xtIwSk

christ

what the fuck

kevin smith is going legit crazy

> entire cast is a bastion of kikewood nepotism

Kill me

That might be twe worst thing I've ever seen.

Kevin Smith needs to stop.

the fuck

It kind of makes you want to reassess your opinion of his earlier works, doesn't it?

>Kevin Smith criticised BvS
I legit can't even KINDA respect him

I'll need to instagram it!

>it's a kevin smith thinks he can still direct episode

>start watching the original clerks
>acting is fucking terrible
>stop watching it

That's a joke, right?

... Right?

>brazis: bratwurst nazis

is this real life?

No. Jokes are funny.

If you guys give me your autismbux I'll go beat the shit out of Kevin Smith.

Looks fun

weed has turned his brain to mush

This is just sad. Please Kevin, JUST FUCKING STOP.

>Brazis

So is the fact that that is fucking stupid supposed to be cool?

...

I just can't get the idea behind that title.

Is yoga as a concept supposed to be funny?
Is it 2008 again and is this an episode of King of the Hill?

The ever living fuck?
Even Rob Schneider would have too much self respect to do this shit.

This is what feminism does to society.

That trailer gave me no understanding of what the movie is about.

>does a handstand and squishes a bunch of little men with her ass

Oh boy here we go. Do you think Kevin Smith made his daughter do it, or is it Depp's kid?

>Lily-Rose Depp
Well, that explain why Johnny is in it.

>Harley Quinn Smith
Oh God fucking damnit, Kevin.

this is what happens when you let nepotism into your movie.
aka the godfather 3 effect.

Nobody's going to mention the fact that this has both Depp's and Smith's daughters in it?

Even Will Smith wouldn't do this to Jayden.

Also, Johnny Depp + Vanessa Paradis = hot stuff.

>thick

It's Harley

>Depp's character from Tusk is not only an official part of this fucking universe, but a main character in the movie

OH FUCK

Kevin Smith is the definition of "DUDE ITS BAD ON PURPOSE I DIDNT EVEN TRY SO I DONT CARE WHAT YOU THINK"

Then why the fuck does it exist? The "intentionally" bad thing you wrote, shot, directed spent a 1000 hours on? Why does it exist if you straight out say its not worth watching

Just because critics hurt your feelings years ago and your spirit tapped out doesnt give you the right to make "criticproof" films

Erf

NEENER NARNY?

>Harley Quinn Smith
>Harley Quinn

That poor soul.

He's also going to be the Quint in MOOSE JAWS probably

>Okay, honey. In this scene you need to sit on these little men until they squish!
>Why do they all look like you, dad?
>JUST DO WHAT I SAY. PUT ON THE TIGHT PANTS THAT DADDY LIKES.

Up through Dogma I think he was still a legitimate filmmaker. Sure some were rough around the edges, but he wrote with a purpose and was trying to say something. This though? This is pure garbage.

Yoga Hosers is kino! KINO!

Goddamnit Kevin, you're not Canadian, leave Canada alone, we never did anything to you, fuck off.

>introducing Lily-Rose Depp and Harley Quinn Smith

You're marooned to a desert Island which plays only one movie and only one movie on a loop for ever.
You have two buttons that will start the loop. If you don't press a button, you will die. Once a button has been pressed, you can't change your selection. There are no other form of entertainment on the island.

Option A):
>After Earth

Option B):
>Yoga Hosers

Which button do you press?

>johnny depp is in this
have i accidentally slipped into an alternate dimension again?

Red State was good

Yeah, and you need quints to go back.

so whats with his recent obsession with canada?

Yoga Hosers. At least there's women in it that use their asses as weapons.

after earth was a nice sci-fi national geographic program

At least fucking Tusks had Michael Parks, what is this shit now?

If I don't press a button, would I die?

Option C):

hockey and weed dude, his whole personality is encompassed by that

Lily Rose and Harley Quinn in yoga pants

Yes as mentioned in the sentence
>If you don't press a button, you will die

...

Well the guy has been wearing an Edmonton Oilers jersey everyday since 1986

Option C is being spit roasted by Gary and Jake Busey

>If you don't press a button, you will die
You made it too easy user

feel the bern

It would be extremely painful.

>Option C
is the entirety of the Big Bang Theory played at 25% speed on VLC.

Now you're talking

I feel sad for those girls, I'm pretty sure they think this is an embarassing piece of shit but couldn't be honest with their dads

That looks terrible.

Is "filmmaker" the only career where the longer you do it the worse you get?

I don't know shit about hockey

So... what's this actually about?

Feels like something Smith made to put his daughter in and because he's a huge Canadaboo.

He made it bad on purpose guys, you just dont get it losers

A

M Night is still a better director than Smith.

What the fuck

I can't wait to see how terrible Clerks 3 is. He got high and wrote the script in one night. I want him to do something unforgivable.

KEK

>It's a Kevin Smith movie starring Johnny Depp
>Kevin Smith's daughter is starring
>Johnny Depp's daughter is starring
>Kevin Smith's daughter is starring
>Kevin Smith's wife is starring
>Jay will probably make a cameo
>Amber Heard will probably make a cameo

is this officially Nepotism: the Movie?
it's very apparent that Depp does not give a flying fuck about his credibility as a serious actor anymore. I know that should have been clear after Mortdecai and PotC 4: the Search for More Money, but this is just the final nail in the coffin.

DUDE WEED LMAO I RIGHT WORDS ON MY MAC AND THEN SOMEHOW GET FUNDING

Is there a legit way to live in a parallel universe because this is just fucking insane.

What if it's a misleading trailer and by some bizarre stroke of genius it turns out to be amazing?

Kevin Smith clearly lost his mind a while ago, back when he started wearing Blue and oranges hockey jerseys daily just because it was his lucky color.
I really want to know what event in his life turned him crazy.

The only thing that would be amazing is if it's released in more than a dozen theaters.

>kevin smith is a christan

Your move, alt-cuck

What if the entire movie is just Kevin Smith and Johnny Depp's daughter's wearing tight pants and using various yoga and wrestling moves on miniature men? There would be extended scenes where they take turns sitting on one of the mini men and smothering him with their crotches to get information out of him, of course.

Whoever is giving Kevin Smith money needs to stop.

He's from Jersey. The fucking guy feeds fast food to his dogs and dropped 30k to fix Jason Mews teeth.

He's always be a little wacko.

I liked Tusk and this looks just as much confusion and funs as it was. True kino.

Johnny Depp or Kevin Smith?

Does Kevin Smith gap to his daughter?
Does Kevin Smith post in cunny threads?

So the two girls fight off Nazi sausages? I don't think I quite get this.

let's not forget about Kevin's podcast buddies

Did you hear that, kids? Instagram! That's a popular cellular phone application that you kids seem to love! There doesn't need to be a joke, just a direct reference! YOU should Instagram it too!

I think Kevin Smith wants to fuck his daughter.
Also what fetish's do you think Kevin Smith has?

What loving father would let their daughters first starring role be this.

MENTION TWITTER NEXT

...

>like his early movies
>embarrassed when cop out and red state came out
>see this
I guess cop out wasn't that bad

Not gonna lie, I'm a little confused

wat

I don't understand this trailer.

So, two girls are invited to a party, where they're going to be used for sex, which they don't like, so they visit some French stereotype in prison who has an army of little sausage men? And they learn yoga to fight them?

I'm sure I could maybe understand if I watched the trailer a few more times but I really don't want to.

Remember when that was already done two years ago?

he took it back after watching it again

>Does Kevin Smith gap to his daughter?
He posts her pics on his own facebook page.

To think I was actually hyped for this trilogy at one point, what the fuck happened to you Kevin?

Yoga hosers, at least that has fap potential, as there will be no other method of titilating myself while on the island.

When will he ever stop with that retarded staring

Also I feel bad for Justin Long

You know, an actual reverse gender teenage gender Jay and Silent bob would be entertaining. Should had done that instead of trying for pg 13