/got/ General

Tormund Teaches Us How To Fuck Edition
youtube.com/watch?v=TUu0PNw3HqY

Old:

friendly reminder N + L = J is happening bros

>You know, I asked him about who Jon Snow's real parents were, and he told me. I can't say who, but I can tell you that it involves a bit of a Luke Skywalker situation. It will all come to fruition eventually. The whole thing with all the fight over proper succession is partly inspired by the War of the Roses in the late 1400s, and back then, to ensure pedigree, the monarchies were kind of inbred. It's definitely fucked up, but it definitely happened back then, so that's why there's incest with the Targaryen line. It's toned down, though.

>Parris did come up with a few alternative suggestions for Jon's parentage that George wouldn't comment on, but apparently one suggestion did provoke one of George's 'evil smiles' (apparently deployed whenever he has come up with an extremely cunning plot twist). However, absolutely no amount of persuasion or bribery would get her to reveal what that theory was.

based GRRM

>it was an "accidental" creampie.
>i mistook her for someone else!
>we must never speak of this!
>fuck me harder ned!
>give benjen a turn ned
>brother brandon won't like sharing me ned
>promise me you won't forget me. promise me, ned.

>Reminder Bran will warg baby Jon at TOJ and Jon was actually Bran all along.

will jon die again then rez??

Who is the face of harrenhall?

Why would the Umber's betray the Stark's for Jon's actions? He's a bastard. Most nobles seem to believe bastards are inherently fuck ups. Why would the Umber's forgive the Bolton's for the Red Wedding just because Ned's bastard did something they didn't like?

if dubs N + L = J is true

if trips I'm winning the megamillions tonight

harren hall is off the table

Ned...

Ollie is a cunt

glad he's dead

>tfw your based brother will never ask renowned beauty Ashara Dayne out for a dance on your behalf

Is Jaime even aware Cersei was locked up? And why she was locked up?

I think its more of a umbers just siding wth boltons because they are afraid of the wildling army, its a bit dumb they are betraying the starks but i guess they are desperate.

ish off teh table

You must have missed the discussion this week, there is 2 theories

>It's all a ruse and Umber's are gonna betray Ramsay

>D&D are hacks

>Jon lying about not coming back to set didn't work on anyone except the dumbest normies

>Rickon saying Shaggydog is really dead and Smalljon betrayed them will get people to believe that and the lie will actually work this time

Ollie did nothing wrong, fuck the Wilding savages

Second one is not much of a theory.

aside from how it makes no sense
-For Ned to want Lyanna
-For Lyanna to want Ned
(they're clearly not the right 'type' for each other)
-For Starks to do incest

Even if somehow they just lusted for each others and didn't care about the incest...
What is the promise?

>Promise-me... That you won't tell people this baby is born of incest?
Yeah she'd really need to remind him right, else he'd just go around telling everyone he fucked his sister while married to Catelyn Tully, and could screw up the alliance!

There is no promise me that makes sense, aside from a promise to claim babby as his own to protect him from Robert.

>this morons thinks the Umbers are master rusers

Yeah this is something I don't understand, the only logical conclusion is that he somehow doesn't know

He is probably not ok with being a cuck

The fact that someone involved actually said anything about the theory at all makes me all the more certain It's a ruse

any /lightninglord/ in?

>Bastardbowl
>Bolton fucking shits have the advantage, Stark loyalists on the defensive
>Ramsay presses the attack, surrounds the Stark army
>all seems lost, Bolton army moves in for the kill
>suddenly, howls tear through the cold air, drowning out the sounds of combat, all combatants stop and turn their gaze south
>Nymeria crests a hilltop, followed by her pack of wolves
>thousands of wolves
>Bolton army BTFO by the natural fury of the North
>Ramsay devoured by Ghost, Nymeria, and Shaggydog since the Northern Master Plan is fucking confirmed
>post yfw

Umbers are siding with boltons, no way theyd give ramsay the real rickon if they weren't. Unless dnd are hacks.

I mean they are hacks, but in this case it would confirm they are even worse

Actually the second one is a theory, the first is the hypothesis.

Tyrion doesn't tel him about Cersei whoring. Lancel didn't, though he did tell the High Sparrow.

So... DOES JAIME KNOW? Someone, call D&D

Not really.
Just one more time, only the dumbest normies.

>mw you thought anyone would read that block of autism

he didn't say anything about the "theory". Just that Shaggydog is actually dead. Do you idiots think the Umbers have direwolf heads laying around?

the lie is already working

>Unless dnd are hacks.
Seriously?

>DABIIIIIID RICKON GIVEN TO RAMSAY TO FLAY DABIIIID

Ollie was a fucking retard.

>there's 1 million wights and WW heading for the wall
>there's literally 100 members of the Nights Watch
>everyone's ignoring their requests for aid
>even Stannis eventually fucks off to Winterfell
>literally the only force remotely willing to help is the wildlings
>b-b-but muh mum and potatoes

Fucking retards the lot of them.

here is a master plot twist: he knows and is ok with being a cuck

when you thought it wouldn't get any worse

please tell me how rasmay will distinquish a direwolf head from a big wolf head

>giving D&D more credit than they are worth

...

>he thinks D&D know what their characters know/are doing

top kek

They didn't even know Samwell was a PoV character while shooting for the season based on the book with Samwell PoV chapters.

Jaime can't become a humanized character until he finds out I think and separates from Cersei

Umber's pulling a ruse doesn't make sense. Even if they have some master plan they'd be risking Rickon's life by handing him over to a unpredictable nutjob.

>implying /got/ isn't 100% concentrated autism to begin with

Pretty sure he does know.

He had a scene with the High Sparrow where he asked why charges weren't brought down against him yet.

This is next level delusion, almost on the same tier as people who still believe Stannis is still alive.

First for delicious pies

>a big wolf head

top kek user. It was totally just a big wolfs head

That image needs background

>grrm promises stuff about nymeria's pack
>probably nothing will happen on the show because they gave arya her eyes back before she even wargs

replaced with refugee PoC ''northern'' house

Exactly, if it was a ruse they'd hand over some farmboy and a larger than average wolf head.

You have never left your basement, but all joking aside how many wolves have you ever seen up close? Living where they do Ramsey has probably seens dozens of wolves and knows exactly what they look like.

Lancel was a qt twink in Season 1

He should team up with Jon

Yeah the NW reasoning for killing jon in the show is so fucking dumb, they all know theres an army of dead cunts coming to fuck their shit up and wildlings are only ones willing to help because no one else would believe them south of the wall.

I mean my boy CIA did the same last season with Sansa, you never know with D&D man

Either way the whole situation is pretty stupid to begin with

Shh. Do you know what I hear? Nothing. No snowfu up the stairs, no mannis out the window, no clickety-click of little chaosh. Do you know why I can't hear any of those things, Branny? Because right now, the treecogs can't see a thing.

I think the idea was that they still don't believe that there's Others and Wights, that it's just made-up fantasies by Jon and other Night's Watchmen to make themselves popular.

>had a ready-made plot for Arya that would actually have been interesting to see
>instead, we just get three episodes of her getting the shit beat out of her by the waif as more and more interesting personality traits are ablated from her psyche

why though

Wolves aren't that big. Many breed of dogs are bigger.

He and Jaime look like shit with short hair.

Man, usually the green screen in this show is pretty good but it was so obvious here it took me out of the scene

Did she fuck anyone except lancel in the show? Also what did she confess to in the show?

>Ramsay sees a direwolf's head
>'Oh you're Rickon Stark'

theres a bit in it where jon goes savage on like 8 people then gets downed and pushed into mud and insects

This was Wyman.

That's how D&D works.
1 line from Wyman.

Euron had 2 lines from his speech on his scene with Balon.

Tower of joy had 2 lines from the dialogue.

That's all you get.
"The north remembers" *die*
That's your Wyman.


And Septon Meribald will probably have 1 line like "You know I marched off to war once... Seen terrible things. War sometime turn good people into beasts".
That's Meribald's speech on the show.

One of the main reasons I could not bring myself round to watching the series anymore. Manderly is so based. After reading his chapters I liked him even more than The Mannis himself. Still guttered he did not fit the D&D narrative.

>Night's Watch gets BTFO at the Fist of the First Men
>heaviest casualties the watch has seen in generations
>all survivors have the same story
>"lol ur lying"

that makes them even MORE retarded

Why are summer islanders such a miniscule part of the ASOIAF universe? Is casual American racism dripping through?

here's a wolf
direwolves r extinct in GoT so he might knows how wolves look like but he doesnt how exactly direwolves look like
he just knows them as big wolves

Id believe this if at any point alliser or any of nightswatchmen denys the existence of the others and the wights.

What about all the wildlings? I mean, propaganda and "they're retarded savages" can only explain so much, thousands of them survived hardhome and saw some srs shit.

Your main problem is that not all the characters have the insights that the reader has, you moron

why do you call him CIA

The Show's Main Mystery (seasons 1-4): how are these characters gonna get themselves out of this mess?

The Show's Main Mystery (seasons 5-6+): how are these showrunners gonna get themselves out of this mess they built for themselves.

Why did you quote me you piece of shit

wolves r massive dogs that can fucking rip u apart

WE

...

I wish your were right user but common

You know the normie audience would have no reaction to the Umbers saving the day, it would make no sense to them, they dont think about any other houses other than the startks and boltons

>will never see my waifu on screen
It hurts

Jew & Jew.

...

AY YO

What is Meera up to?

they literally all know about wights and don't question the existence of either them or white walkers

Stop this racism or I will alert the moderators of this sub

...

>they literally all know about wights and don't question the existence of either them or white walkers

[citation needed]

WUZ

Couldn't they go to some reneissance hall instead of bluescreening that sceen?

HOL UP

>Damn aint no kfc finna fix dis shiet

unfortunately u r right
i want to believe tho and i want to hope

When have they questioned the existence of either?

welcome to /got/

dont care about the show enough to really discuss it but Tormund is probably my favorite character, he isn't well written, erudite, interesting, of affluence and he's even gimmicky but he still brings a smile to my face

Yes, but compared to direwolves?

Look, let me destroy the argument once and for all:
The Karstarks HAVE seen a direwolf. They saw Grey Wind. And god knows who else in the Bolton's employ have seen a direwolf. They can tell if it's real or not. Hell, someone might have even seen Shaggydog.

Being seduced by Bran judging by that pose he's pulling.

It is known

>Mods gather, and now my shitposting begins. >It shall not end until my ban.
>I shall take no waifus, hold no trips, father no memes.
>I shall wear no names and win no screencaps.
>I shall post and get banned at my post.
>I am the user in the darkness.
>I am the watcher of the board.
>I am the shield that guards from realms of reddit.

>I pledge my austism and pastas to this board, for this night and all the nights to come

>tfw no gf to lick all over her face
>tfw no wolf