Character goes to bed

>Character goes to bed
>Doesn't struggle with an ichy anus all night

I woke up with an itchy anus today

SHREK

KEK

>character doesnt wake up with some yellow stuff leaking from his anus

Gross

Either eat a better diet or learn how to wipe your ass

>character doesn't wake up with the white balls of dead skin around and in his mouth


come on i've heard of suspension of disbelief but this is ridiculous

Get out normie

Man who go to bed with itchy bottom wake up with smelly finger

>character doesn't use onion's layers to wipe his ass

>character doesn't wake up in the middle of the night and use his poopjug

>main character doesn't peel the bacterial layer off his underarm

when did cinema get rid of real character development?

>character doesnt wake himself up in the middle of the night, as a result of moving in his sleep and his lower legs getting scratched by his long toenails

It's almost like they deliberately make films unrealistic just to fuck with us

I wash mine in the bidet every night before going to bed.

you have pinworms, go to a doctor

SOMEBODY

ONCE

>character brushes his teeth
>doesn't spit out half a gallon of blood

>pinworms

FINGERED

THE RED RANGER

>character doesn't habitually pull out clumps of armpit hair

Come on now

>character doesn't regularly browse Reddit

why

WHY DO THE LAST HONEY POPS TASTE LIKE LEMON

>character doesn't peel large bloody scabs covered with green mucus from the inside of his nose
>character doesn't eat those scabs

>doesnt wake up with a boner

...

>There are people in this thread ignoring the obvious signs of a parasitic infestation
Holy fuck you disgusting neets, go to the pharmacy and get some stuff to kill the worms living inside you. Your butthole itches at night because these things crawl out to lay their eggs there.

Just get a nice comfy plug m8

What's his name?

>her

Hot. Sauce?

They make me feel less lonely.

kek

I like to pick them out of my ass when I'm taking a shit and crush them between my fingers.

that's what happens when you don't do it regularly, faggot

>character doesn'tdo anything
Fucking really.

>character gets out of bed

I MEAN COME ON

>ITCHY ANUS
>FART IT AWAY

>OP lay awake again, conscious of his ever-itchy anus. It was an itch he just could not scratch - a constant, overwhelming longing to be filled by cock.

>character doesn't tear off his ball hairs then eat them

>character doesn't masturbate while sniffing his sister's panties before going to bed every night

?????

>Character takes a fat, steaming shit
>Doesn't block the toilet with 6 rolls of toilet paper from the epic struggle to meticulously remove all the shit

>character in my favorite amerime doesn't squirt his liquid feces into a turdsack in the middle of the night to avoid his housemates

Just about done

ACTION PLEASE