Confess, Sup Forums

Confess, Sup Forums

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I confess that last night I watched the movie Flubber and then masturbated to the thought of my grandfather's feet covered in Flubber.

I once did this but to Gary Oak's sister

I really hate GOT season 5 and 6. I have no doubt that GRRM will handle Hodors death scene better than the show. Still...I choked up and my lip quivered when he died. Also, I need anal stimulation in order to have a great orgasm.

the GoT show is such complete trash now but I can't stop watching it, help me repent

>I used to steal candy bars from gas stations
>I hate my daily life
>I'm a disappointment to my family
>I failed out of college 3 times
>I haven't had sex in 10 years
>I enjoy National Treasure
>I went to a Kesha concert
>Hot dogs are my favorite food
>I post memes on instagram
>I shitpost on Sup Forums
I-is that enough High Sparrow?

Yes, now do the naked walk of sha...wait, you like National Treasure? Cut your throat from ear to ear, dog.

I yelled at a midget.

I hope the High Sparrow and the Faith Militant wins and overthrows the feudal monarchies of Westeros in exchange for a theocratic oligarchy of the Most Devout. They would rule with an iron grip, and the populace would strictly adhere to the teachings and punishments of The Seven-Pointed Star. Kinda like Saudi Arabia under Islam with the Quran, but with no degeneracy.

I like to imagine that this republic would fail due to the tradition of one ruler over one realm. Instead of being overthrown. The Most Devout would just hand total control over to the High Septon ( except for choice of inheritance, of course ) .
A fan can hope.

I am Septon Unella. The High Sparrow is incapacitated with wine at the moment. I will judge you through the seven at his behapst or something. I laughed at a vietnam vet with one leg at the zoo when I was a child and he gave me the look of death. So you're not so bad, let it go. Don't ask what vietnam is.

I the Sparrow to win for those reasons. It gives the faith of the seven a hand in the final war of the religions (White Walkers vs Lord of Light vs Many Faced God vs Old Gods). Its obvious the story is shifting into religions becoming the end game conflict.

My girlfriend is pregnant and I can't deal with it anymore

This threads off to a good start.

I've been lurking for almost 2 years and I still don't understand half of the memes that are on this board.

Unella, Septon, again. If you're dealt a bad hand, fold. Sneak off to Braavos. If she finds you their, she won't recognize you. No alimony!

National Treasure is awesome

Why do I get the feeling that you're not lying?

youtube.com/watch?v=5EjybY__oDQ
Once when I was a kid and had a bad fever I fell asleep with my TV on and this was on when I woke up. Forgot about it until a few years ago at a Primus concert when they played a few Popeye cartoons onscreen between sets and this one came on. I remembered the goons being way more like deranged cannibal humans.

I greentexted on FB once. May the lord have mercy on my soul

Fuck me I posted this in the wrong thread. Carry on, nothing to see here.

My first reaction to almost everything people say to me involves the word "implying." I think Sup Forums is starting to seriously affect me mentally.

I sucked a man's dick... and I liked it.

I recently finished reading a book that made me realize that my life is empty and that I will die numb and alone. I plan to kill myself within the next few months.

>I blew my cousin when I was 8 and he was 10, just the head though, and he didn't cum
I swear I'm not gay.
Shame.

>Starting
You have no idea. Gtfo while you can
you probably won't. Thry all stay. Forever

i have a folder with over 600 jordyn jones noses

It's just a phase,bro. Someone pls post the pepe timeline pic

Yeah, I read the novelization of Flubber too.

I call everyday people who dissapoint me plebians. (unironically...ugh)
Kill me.

I masturbate to amateur gay porn, and no one else knows about it.

I frequently criticize movies that I haven't even watched just because I don't like some minor detail about them.

I've jerked it to amateur bro rape before. Nothing gay about it imo.

Why amateur?

>wrong image
>fixed it

I have a few clothing fetishes and if children are wearing said clothing then I have no qualms fapping to them

Because if someone is being paid to do it, it's likely that they aren't actually enjoying themselves. It is simply work for money.

good thing you're not gay though

I haven't had sex in five years. It's gotten to the point where I'm seriously considering fucking a dude in the ass with my eyes closed.

I shitpost so intensely that I sometimes argue with myself

I think season 10 of the trailer park boys kinda sucks. Nothing like the first few seasons. Private dancer character is stupid. Why the fuck are snoop dog, jimmy kimmel, and that other shithead in the trailer park? (Like why was that written into the script/unnecessary) Bubbles still cool, that's pretty much it.

Netflix killed tpb.

Also, south park sucks after about s07. They shifted humor a tiny bit, changed up animation style some, and kinda stretch for plot sometimes.

I unironically enjoy current WoW and even play Hearthstone and Heroes of the Storm. I main Malfurion, play a resto druid and use a druid theme deck to satisfy my autism.

I thought season 8 was a good effort, and ultimately better than 5 through 7, but 9 and 10 were shit.

Just hire a prostitute if you're that desperate you fag

Oh yeah

I've lost my virginity to a prostitute

I regret nothing.

I confess that I beat off to trannies. I confess that I want to fuck one very bad and I am 100% straight.

I stopped watching Game of Thrones a couple years ago and just powered through seasons 4, 5, and a couple eps of 6 (but not all the eps of 6 that have aired).

Why are they allowing these High Sparrow faggots to have the run of King's Landing again? Would it be mad-king tier political suicide to round them all up and have them arrested?

I think they lost that small-time feel. It's less mockumentary, and more scripted and you can tell.

nothing gay about fucking a tranny
infact, i would suck on that bulge right there

wew lads

>WW
>religion

u wot m8

It is obviously leading to Jon Snow X Dani Vs the White Walkers

National Treasure is good

>100% straight

Plenty of studies have proven it's not gay to be sexually attracted to transgender women. People don't understand that sex and gender are different. Trans women = women, 100%

Pic related is trans, I'd blow her in an instant and swallow any sweet nectar she might give, then I'd fuck her senselessly. Now, technically speaking, and I'm not into it, but even if a transwoman fucks you in the ass, again.. it's not gay, it just isn't. Gay = attraction to masculinity and sex organs really are irrelevant. I'm not into men at all, just women.

The Lannisters stupidly blessed them with power. Now that they have power, they'll be harder to uproot than the Christians during the Caligula era. Killing them only makes more of them.

Son, i'm kingdom of lordran

I got very drunk one night several weeks ago and confessed my darkest secret to my little sister. I don't know why I did it. I just brought it up out of nowhere.

I told her that I want to kill myself, and that it's the only thing in life that I look forward to anymore.

She got angry. Since I moved out I haven't seen her much. She stopped talking to me that night, and we haven't spoken since. I doubt we will ever reconnect in this life.

I don't seed torrents ever, not even on private trackers.
I've had sex with several traps so I'm a closet bisexual.
I used to masterbute by stroking my 11 year old dick on my sisters panties 11 years ago.

>I told her that I want to kill myself, and that it's the only thing in life that I look forward to anymore.

I had thoughts like this for a period in my life. Around when I was 16. Then they went away.

Now, I'm still a loser. In fact, I have more reason to kill myself now than I ever did previously. But... it all ain't so bad. These things pass sometimes.

I literally only come to Sup Forums to look at what the newest meme is, then i help force it both here and on many other boards on Sup Forums. I also screenshot any post with more than 5 responses and spam them en masse on r/Sup Forums.

why would your sister stop talking to you at a time when you obviously need family nearby

When I was 10 I stomped on a fallen bird's nest full of chicks in front of my friends to be edgy.

>traps looking like the girl from super 8
Just end my life already.

Stop harassing nature, faggot. Nature didn't do anything to you.

I guess that's why they call this board Random looool

but im afraid that i, well i may have faked it and I wouldn't be caught dead in this place.

I find movies to be incredibly boring these last few years. I'm sick of superheros and remakes.

Same with TV shows, the only one I follow anymore is Game of Thrones and I hate that even.

You fucked up two of my favorite boards and I hope you lose a finger at some point in your life for it.

that's cold bro

>snuffing the life out of innocent creatures for a reaction
How are you not a serial killer by now?

its weird how I can be nostalgic over the worst years of my life because of a song lyric

Sup Forums is the most casual board.

You are retarded!

The worst part of this is that I believe it.

The sound of them crunching would probably still haunt me to this day

Powerlevel offenses are the worst. Shame, user.

I kind of have to agree. How can you not get Sup Forums memes? They're stupid, and they're exactly what you see. There's nothing more to them. How could you be here for two years and not understand them?

sucks that nice elle tranny cock

Hodor dies.

So you're that Fred posting faggot ruining my Pepe threads.
Kys

i didnt enjoy no country for old men

I came from a land down under

I pan everything. I haven't enjoyed a movie or tv show in years. I come here to shitpost.

This post is full of shit. Disregard.

I absent mindedly smiled at a little girl once.
never again

He's telling the truth! There's been studies!

Is there any OTHER reason to come here?

Go to bed, Jared.

I haven't had a decent boner in like two months :(

>amateur bro rape
The heck? Is that a thing?

>I don't seed torrents ever
people like you disgust me. How hard can it be ? just let the torrent on at least 1 week

Who is this Boner Donor?

My sex drive died. I can still get hard from sheer willpower, but I can't cum anymore. It's been like this for a couple of months. I've given up on using my dick. I don't even feel aroused by anything anymore.

I haven't told anyone this.

>stole underwear from a girl in my building because i was bored and got away with it,
>accidentally corrupted the family's pictures of my boss because i thought it took too much place in his hard-drive,
>spent two thousands dollars on micro-transactions only to play with poor people hating MT with their guts,
>really hope that Daenerys die or doesn't end up on the iron throne since she's so much of an entitled cunt it's just painful to watch.

Watch Bloodline on Netflix. See The Good Guys and Florence Foster Jenkins and Green Room.

Last week I ran over a dog while on the job and just kept driving. If I called it in or stopped to help I'd have to report it to my store and do a drug test which I undoubtedly would have failed considering I got mega high like three days earlier. RIP pupper ;__:

Why is this bad?
You have time to do shit now instead of following your dick to failure & poverty.

Sounds like you're feeling guilty about something. What is it, user?

It creates a really awkward situation when this girl in my Calc class tries to come onto me and hit me up on Tinder and shit and I can't explain to her that I have zero sex drive. And I'm already steeped in poverty and failure.

You did nothing wrong, dogs are a pest.

SHAME! The high sparrow would never drink wine, he doesn't like the taste!

SHAME!

SHAME! SHAME!

I've been using my roommate's toothpaste for the better part four months now. He has to notice that there isn't any other toothpaste but he doesn't say anything so I just keep doing it.

I burned my brother for playing with my toy knight. I didn't even care about it, I just hated seeing him enjoy my things.