HOL UP!

HOL UP!

wite wiminz

honkey mahfah

Jesus christ this looks fucking awful. Essentially unrecognizable from the books.

"Lesser" actors have cut 50 fucking pounds for cheap Brendan Fraser History Channel movies, just to look authentic, yet this giga nigga A-list great actor couldn't slim up for the role? Inexcusable.

Sad to see Will Smith like this

>Roland is constantly described in great detail as a clean cut Not-Clint-Eastwood with bombardier blue eyes
>LET'S MAKE HIM BLACK SO WE CAN STIR UP CONTROVERSY FOR OUR MARKETING TEAM THAT REALLY WORKED GREAT FOR GHOSTBUSTERS

Just, why?

What the fuck? Why does he look like he walked right out of a costume shop ready for ComicCon?

And the revolver is too small... I figured something closer to Walker Colts in size...

That's some nice form you got there.

Why the fuck is his gun so small.....

>described in great detail as a clean cut Not-Clint-Eastwood with bombardier blue eyes
>hmm, a mysterious character with a gun...... BETTER RIP OFF CLINT EASTWOOD

I love King but the man can be a hack.

WE

>Roland is constantly described in great detail as a clean cut Not-Clint-Eastwood with bombardier blue eyes

Kek. Find me a source, cunt. I've read them 4 times.

Did the producers even read the books? It looks like lazy capeshit so far

in book one they made it sound like his guns were hand cannons, but in 2 its said they shoot 45 long colt which is a pretty big cartridge but not as big as i thought they would be.

Casting = Good

Costume = Terrible

This holy shit.

That gun is way too small.

Yeah, they're just standard turn of the century revolvers. I'm not sure why people think they need to be enormous.

>Did the producers even read the books?
Maybe you didn't notice that they got a meme black actor to play Roland fucking Deschain.

does this mean hes going to be a shit shot because he cant remember the face of his father

He needs a MAN's gun, not some leetle seessy gun.

>source
The Dark Tower series, books one through eight.

Looks like a Remington 1858 conversion.

Not a great design, the Colts looked more robust. The taper makes the Remington look a little faggy if you ask me...

Hell, they could have just done a custom, big frame Single Action Colt and called it a day.

>5 minute cheesy intro with hammy voice-over narration about how Gilead fell to wow the audiences with magickal cgi explosions and so on
>in modern-day New York there's a vigilante on the streets, an urban legend, a boogeyman called Roland. he's street-wise and the community likes him but he seems to appear and disappear out of thin air
>Shia-type fast talking Eddie and a sassy young woman who need no man stumble onto him and get to know him better
>Shia-type due to cirumstances starts to learn about how to be a gunslinger, sassy girl learns some stupid magic crap
>Evil Rust appears and starts to upturn police cars and summons a dark thundering cloud over NY and he wants to merge this world with Roland's world which he already corrupted(!)
>he is defeated by the trio, each showing off their strength
>in the end Evil Rust talks to his boss who tells him not to fail him again
>the trio enters the portal to Roland's world "to set things right"

kek
they should've got Matthew McConaughey to play Roland and idris elba to play the sorcerer

No, find an actual quote you dick. The only time Eastwood is brought up is by King himself in a forward.

And black people can have blue eyes.

His race is almost completely irrelevant. It plays a minor role in a later book.

You're autistic if you can't move past this. Literally.

WHERE DAT NIGGA AT

...

you are retarded and didnt even read the books probably. half of book 2 is about detta hating roland because he is a white honkey

It was in Book 2 that there was an Eastwood reference too. Reference to the cop who was watching a film later and saw the main character (Eastwood) and stood up screaming because he remembered his run in with Roland or something...

>literally nothing special or remarkable about fabled heirloom last-of-their-kind firearms

cmon king, you didnt have to let them destroy your magnum opus

>can't look more authentic than lowly Walking Dead
Bravo movie industry! Bravo blacks!

That would be racist.

literally this. are you a fucking idiot

And it's completely unimportant. A minor part of the story that certainly won't fit into the movie.

I hope this movie bombs. Ghostbusters set the SJW shitheads back. More and more bombs will continue to fuck them over until, eventually, their corrupting ideology is powerless in cinema.

WUZ

Racist ass BLM supporters have bitched about less whenever something gets "white-washed", apparently it's ok to black-wash, yellow-wash and brown-wash but god forbid anything is white-washed for an audience that is primarily white people spending loads of money.

Cool

Find me a quote where his fucking "bombardier eyes" matter.

Exactly, should have worked up some custom made Colts.

They're fucking characters as much as any of the other meatbags in the story.

The revolver in the picture looks like a standard, entry level replica you can order online.

who is this semen demon

shut up
th-they wouldn't do this!

Directly from the books, they're just blued .45s with sandalwood grips. They are unique because nobody else has firearms and they are old.

There is nothing otherwise unique or magical about them.

...

>the rare white character whose race actually matters to the story and other important characters
>OMG IT'S UNIMPORTANT AND IT CAN BE IGNORED

They're unique because they're made from Excalibur, you retard.

oh wow of course a black guy with a gun how fucking racist

GOOD! Race doesn't matter, honkey!
*watches 12 Years A Slave, Django, and Precious*
There's only 1 race and that's the human race.

>negroids can have blue eyes

Hahahahaaaaahhhhhhhaaaaahhgahahahahwheebrfhdehehehehohohohahahhhaaaa

Ok? And? They still aren't ever described as being anything but .45s. You want some big ass sword-gun or something?

Pretty sure I remember more elaborate descriptions of the guns than just 'blued 34's w sandalwood grips, nothing special'.

He's the Gunslinger. Those are his signature arms, heirlooms, not some shit you pick up at a random gun show.

There are sentient trains, succubi, and dudes with bird heads in the books and Dr. Doom who throws sneeches and uses lightsabers

A black dude with blue eyes ain't that big a stretch.

HAHAHAHAHA

Not all revolvers chambered in .45 Colt are created equal.

Some look much more badass than others.

Some filmmakers actually care about their work.

This just looks sloppy and gay.

Now that you mention it, a Gunblade could probably draw in some weeb ticket sales.

Hodge Twins
Elliot Hulse

They're special because nobody else owns guns any more and hes good with them. The actual description of the guns is very limited.

wow, this really makes you think about fatherless homes in the black community

Great casting.

Why is Rick so perfect?

this is a negroid to you?

if only we were living on a different level of the tower

mixed race

Yup. A truly genetically gifted one. I'm pretty sure neither of those fitness channels have white parents or grandparents either. Very particular coincidence.

So glad this is gonna flop. The Dindu Tower novels aren't even faggot King's most popular books and the fans are going to be put off by an Affirmative Action hire to play Roland.

What could have been if King were dead.

What could have been if King weren't a white suburbanite liberal.
FTFY

I mean.

Does it really matter what his race is?

Idris Elba is a legitimately good actor so I don't see the problem here. It's not like his race mattered in the book.

It's not like they got chris rock or some other goofy ass bad black actor.

I have 0 problems with Roland being portrayed by Idris, my problem is the background. What the fuck is wrong with it? I always imaged The Dark Tower as taking place in the stereotypical Old West. What the fuck is going on with this?

King doesnt matter at all. He has fuck all say in any of the movies. He had 0 influence over The Shining, IT, 1408 or even The Mist.

At least IT looks promising. Georgie's bedroom with the stuffed turtle and the UFO hanging over his head is kino.

I am confident you are incorrect, but I do not have any evidence with which to contradict your assertion.

>It's not like his race mattered in the book.
You can just admit you've never read the series.

They are running their own timeline set after book 7.

We are getting expensive fanfic.

>not like his race mattered in the book

It was only one of the most important issues over almost an entire book and critical for the character development of the protagonists....

Yeah, no big deal.

STOP THEY MIGHT BE READING THIS

Dude when Kubrick was making The Shining, he didnt even consult King. He did what he wanted. Thats why King was salty when it was released saying it didnt match the narrative of the book (which it didnt but still).

Authors are only there for consultation and to collect royalties. They spout opinions but they sure as hell arent in charge of anything in the movie.

I knew about The Shining, but I'm pretty sure most of the other adaptations had some level of input from King.

so have the characters call him a nigger instead of a honky

reeeeee im so mad right now

Yes they do but like I said, only at the consultation level. To decide who directs, acts or anything else important in the movie is not up to them. They can only suggest.

Good idea for a joke, just poorly executed. Have a (you) anyway, fellow book reader.

You can just admit you got BTFO, user. We'll still like you.

WUZ WASTING QUINTS

It was executed fine, but this is Sup Forums, not /lit/ so you, me, and he were the only ones to "get" it.

Books will almost never translate well into movie adaptions. There's too many forces pulling at every direction to change it into something well what you have.

Dark Tower is just another perfect example and Stephen King pretty much gave up on any good adaption and just collected the money.

H A I R
L O S S

in the book they're described as being huge and intimidating. The metal for the guns that the Gunslingers use are literally made from the sword of King Arthur.

Tiny gun looks tiny.

Probably the worst part of this mess.

That sounds awful enough to be real.

Honestly the casting thing isn't that bad. But there's no way the adaptation will be anything but awful.

I'm not seeing it.

It hasn't receded in the past 13 years or so, I think he just got shit luck with a really high hairline.

its confirmed that rolan has the horn of eld in the adaptation, likely the movies will take on a different path than the books

>A Sony Pictures Entertainment production

They're huge and intimidating because nobody else owns firearms. And being made from Excalibur means fuckall. They aren't magical.

It honestly isn't that big a deal. Detta doesn't trust him for like half a book. But Susan does. You could remove those aspects from the boom without making any impact.

>genetically gifted
>5'6

Hahaahha

I honestly don't understand how anyone dissapointed by Elba's casting is automatically branded racist and a Sup Forumsack.

I'd be just as irritated if they had made John Coffey from Green Mile or Jerome Robinson in the upcoming Mr. Mercedes adaptation or Mother Abigail from The Stand white, because the races of those characters are important.

I honestly didn't mind turning Red black in Shawshank because his race wasn't all that important in the story (not to mention Freeman knocking it out of the fucking park). Similarly, I wouldn't have cared if they'd made Dick Halloran white in The Shining, because the race of that particular character wasn't integral to the story.

These people will soon make the term 'racist' the most useless ad-hom in the book. I wonder how many people who would otherwise be sympathetic to their myriad grievances just absolutely can't stand them now because of shit like this.

I think Idris has the stoic demeanor, gravitas, and screen presence to play Roland. That said, it's still a blatant slap in the face to fans of the source material.

Aren't gunslingers supposed to remember their father's face?

Only because negotiations broke down. Chris Rock was THIS CLOSE to signing on the dotted line. The studio was about to put in a call to the agents of L.L. Cool J, Snoop Dogg, and Dave Chappelle but then one of them remembered that he'd done a really cool BBC cuck-scene with his wife and Elba so here we are.

But it was so close....