Going to the UK for a bit this summer...

Going to the UK for a bit this summer. Anyone know some things I can do that will scream "I'm an American" or preferable will be seen as overtly offensive to British people? I was thinking of wearing a shirt like pic related, or even better one of those douchey American tang tops, and I'll also say "f a m" and "bro" a lot. That sounded like a good start but was hoping you guys could help me out some more.

Wear a MAGA hat, then travel around a majority Liberal city while consistently congratulating them for leaving the EU. Also ask them why they haven't built a wall around the English channel. Wear that shirt, too.

Amerifats are noticable anyway over here because they are load, stupid and don't know how to pronounce words properly

The only wayyou will offend us is with your blinding ignorance and general stupidity

When in Rome, do as the Romans do.

Don't be an embarrassing dick.

I ment loud not load, well ima go kill my self

I figure they won't give a fuck.

Be sure to tip your pub bartender.

>don't know how to pronounce words properly
actually you have it the wrong way, but yes stupid american is sort of what I'm going for

I'd respect the whole no tipping thing a lot more if I didn't have to pay for water and to use the toilet everywhere

Wtf don't bully Britain they're cool, even though I keep getting bullied by them routinely, but I always remember that they are our cultural overlords and immediately cease to defend my country in an argument because of it.

In short, I am a proud cuckold for Britain and I prep the BBC quite often.

Would you clue me in about the tips while we're at it? I mostly pay with a card, gratuity is not always available, what do I do?

I rarely have more than a couple of pints in the same pub.

Somebody's going to punch your lil bitch ass out and I'm going to laugh.

>Don't be American

You're most likely a spic therefore the Polish will think you are a churka or turk and the English will know you are a dirty foreigner that has come to exploit their country.
You don't even have to wear anything offensive, because you will offend people as you are a shitskin. They will fear for their daughters virginity and fear for their wallets

Pubs actually have to give you free tap water by law, as does any establishment serving alcohol.

I was joking, don't tip in a pub you'll just get laughed at.

Come to Scotland and point out that you too are Scottish. Wear your contrived clan tartan and ask people if they know Ewan Mcgregor. Make sure to tell everyone how good you think Nigel Farage is and that Scotland would benefit from more golf courses from Trump. That should get you noticed.

Not in my face anyway. And they should be accustomed to tourists in Soho.

Thanks for the tip.

>amerifat so stupid
.can't pronounce cheque
>change spelling to check just to help ever dumbshit amerifat
And that is one example of which there are many. You can't use the pronunciation of fucking krispy kreme as an example, that is just stupid

A towel around one's head and/or a bath robe and sandals make a tolerable disguise, especially around Knightsbridge.

great ideas, maybe I'll start talking about "muh heritage"
not of latin american descent, just your regular ignorant american

SPBP

You can spot an American in a croud easily.

Fat and loud and stupid doesn't need a t-shirt

Just do as you do at home. They will notice.

>Liberal
You seem to forget that outside of America, your political buzzwords don't mean what they think you do.

Beat up some Pakis and a lot of people will secretly like you.

You'll also get pussy

Disregard all the """"advice"""" in this thread
Heres what you do, you go to a small working class town in the midlands.
Then you wait outside one of the care units in your ford mustang, wait for all the English women to come out for a fag break.
Then you approach the best looking one, she might be slightly chubby but this is fine its the average size here.
You tell her you have come to whisk her away from her shit life here, as she earns minimum wage and works 12 hour shifts
She will come with you, you accompany her to town then tell her to strip in the town centre, give her a sharpie or permanent marker and tell her to write on her chest
"I love american cock"
Tell her to sing the The Star Spangled Banner, and ask her to shout "English cock is pathetic, I would always open my legs up for yank cock"
The onlookers will be very offended, feel unworthy and ashamed by how you have defiled their image of britannia in all her glory.

Then you just leave her there, maybe say that you're a radical muslim that will really hit the message home.

Just act as if you were from LA.
Being black is a plus.