/brit/

how goes /gf2017/ lads edition

Other urls found in this thread:

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anish_Kapoor
bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-39716009
i.4cdn.org/b/1493192003676.webm
moneysavingexpert.com/savings/cash-isa-transfers
youtube.com/user/RSDMaximilian/videos
youtube.com/watch?v=jWrtQOgOlHY
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Commonwealth_citizen#Consular_assistance
menshealth.com/health/sleep-position-master/slide/1
abc.net.au/news/2017-04-26/more-people-than-ever-are-single-and-thats-a-good-thing/8473398
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

getting laid right now lad. fuck off Virgos

just had to chase a cane toad out of the kitchen

the existence of these horrid creatures is proof that there is no god

What's cunny?

PUA master here

you wanna get laid? do the following:

lead off with a neg and then look for IOI's, make sure you escalate quickly and keep playfully insulting while laying foundation, but don't forget to agonize her friends while giving off clarity of intent, look for affirmations (her breathing) and keep communication frequency at compliance, she will shit test you so build credibility by direct game, using the disarm approach wingman. Drop anchor, then eject while eye glazing using the implicit technique, one she's lockedout nickle back her till game over

pick up artist? more like PUKE up artist haha

just had to chase a virgin out of /brit/

the existence of these horrid creatures is proof that there is no god

Just got 4chanX, this is a bit mad

Fanny innit

for millennia my ancestors have successfully engaged with coitus, fought off numerous diseases, survived wars and natural disasters

however I, in 2017, cannot get a girlfriend

it's beggar's belief

fuck off reddit flags

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anish_Kapoor
He owns exclusive rights to use Vantablack (the blackest substance known) for artistic purposes.[15]

*hides the virgin stare*
*adopts a confident non-virgin stride*

haha alri /brit/ how are my fellow non-virgins doing?

as grandma used to say, a line a day keeps the depression at bay

This is why you should never have just one kid

The gf thing isn't as uncommon/bad. I know lads who haven't a gf but get laid.

i think she meant a line every 10 minutes

reminder girls can smell you virginity

whoa got notified when you replied, do it again

did the man kick the ball? hahaha
bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-39716009

no they can't

Australians what's it like to have a beach at your disposal any time you want with sand and sunny hot weather?

ah, I should let the record show that I do not get laid either

/16yogf2017/ goes poorly

your virginity is showing mate

very nice

Ye Olde Greggsnut

I had sex last night

just had a letter in from my bank

>your Cash ISA interest rate is being cut from 0.5% to 0.05%

Ah yes so 50p interest on every £1000 saved hmm yes excellent

...

...

pinnacle of British dining desu

Yeah I'm just saying the never having had a gf thing isn't as bad as you lot make it out to be. If you were ever asked about it, you can literally say you've never had one (up to a certain age) and get away with it.

...

did you lick it to get high?

smelly virgin bastard I can smell the cum in your balls from here

pooey bum

alri

Can you drink on the beach?

the potential-gf asked if I ever had one before, wasn't a big deal when I said no

>I had sex last night

me after a bit of the hard stuff haha
i.4cdn.org/b/1493192003676.webm

the thermometer in my room is barely on double digits

Don't even care about being a virgin or not having a girlfriend. The mental anguish is from feeling undesirable, worthless. I don't actually want a girlfriend at all. I just want to know I could get one. Every time a girl has implicitly made herself available to me, I've never felt validated or pursued the offer because all these girls have been below my standards.

>up to a certain age
which is

nice

jf scum like you trashed one of the sydney beaches on boxing day so it's permanently banned there but most city beaches you can drink before sunset I believe

very comfy

how goes /'cide2017/ lads?

some lad on /brit/ summed up my feelings perfectly a few months back:

"The reason I'm still a virgin is that deep down I consider myself to be much more desirable than I factually am.

Even though rational thinking leads one to conclude I am a 5-6/10, I cannot fundamentally accept this. For this reason, I have scoffed at all the 5-6/10 girls that I have a chance with, because on a fundamental level I have convinced myself I am worth at least an 8/10 girl.

Still, I could never see myself accepting a 5-6/10 in my life. I would rather be a virgin. I am quite fine as it is really. Still waiting for that 8/10."

22

sydneylad? fucking cold tonight, might have to wear some pjs so I don't freeze

17

what's the relationship between canada and aus like irl? quite amicale I presume since you have quite a lot in common?

sorry

so is it better to tell the truth or lie?

You can transfer to get a better rate lad

moneysavingexpert.com/savings/cash-isa-transfers

>"The reason I'm still a virgin is that deep down I consider myself to be much more desirable than I factually am.
>Even though rational thinking leads one to conclude I am a 5-6/10, I cannot fundamentally accept this. For this reason, I have scoffed at all the 5-6/10 girls that I have a chance with, because on a fundamental level I have convinced myself I am worth at least an 8/10 girl.
>Still, I could never see myself accepting a 5-6/10 in my life. I would rather be a virgin. I am quite fine as it is really. Still waiting for that 8/10."

Oh Jesus Christ, oh fuck. Reading it put so succinctly disturbs me.

I don't know, maybe some time in your mid 20s? I'm not that age yet, but it seems like you couldn't pull off
>Dude I'm a player lmao
At that point, or it would be harder to do so convincingly

Get a 6/10, git gud at sex and acquire the confidence that comes with it, to raise your value

The Australians I meet are friendly IRL, they like to work at our Ski resorts and as tree planters

c-canberra

>wearing pyjamas
Unless you have a literal vagina between your legs, this is unacceptable

Lie about what? Whether you've had a gf, or the reasons for it?

tbf it was probably more european/ english backpackers. don't really like that beach anyway but it's popular with younger people

personally hate the cunts but most people here are pretty receptive to them, a lot of people go to whistler for extended periods and a fair amount of canucks come here for extended holidays

both

I've seen posts you people wouldn't believe. Paranoid schizophrenics on drugs off the shoulder of Belfast. I watched Tim Bryne's face glitter in the dark near his rented flat in High Wycombe. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to poo.

This I sleep fully clothed ready for the next day

ha poof

what do you do on colder nights?

>not sleeping naked

genuinely think if you asked most people theyd just group them with yanks on most things
theres a bit of a warmer feeling because theyre not quite yanks but for the most part theyre indistinguishable

recently i was reading about the agreement we have with them with embassies. if we dont have one in some country we can go and use theirs and they can go to ours (most of theirs in africa, ours in the pacific). thats alri

if you dont sleep nude you have something wrong with you

I sleep? I have a duvet mate
This

don't go to the beach
hate sand and sun

last time I did that a monkey sucked me off

this seems a little accurate but at least in my case it's more that I have absolutely no idea how to approach girls, I always default to acting uninterested and don't know how to move beyond that, terrified of showing I like someone and being completely shot down

I'm 20 years old and get bullied at college and at work by people younger than me.

dont sleep nude because my dog likes to sleep right in front of my cocknballs and it feels wrong
>duvet
doona

mine isn't thick enough for cold nights

you probably deserve it

What do they do to you?

Bullied or bantered?

HATE the canuck with the weed on the beach fantasies

used to feel the same and this lad sorted me out

made me realise that you shouldn't be ashamed of liking someone, if you say you're interested in someone and they say the feeling isn't mutual then fine, just move on

youtube.com/user/RSDMaximilian/videos

Well lying about having had a gf is not ideal because eventually it seems likely that questions will come up which you'll struggle with. Of course if you just want to be with said girl for a few weeks and fuck her it won't matter.
Being honest but implying it's because of other reasons can work too, eg say you've never had a gf but imply you've been with girls. That gets around harder questions and is semi truthful. Obviously don't say
>Oh yeah I've never had a gf because I'm a loser and hopeless with women

Maybe he'd like it

I got drunk on tinychat a couple weeks ago with some Ausies from Sup Forums. Weird people but funny but they all kinda seemed down/sad.

virginposting on /brit/ and suddenly this came on my spotify heh

youtube.com/watch?v=jWrtQOgOlHY

me but without the delusion or thought of deserving a better girl. i just don't see the risk-reward being favourable to bother with a girl that's not top-tier

Weeds for gays. I'm on the liquor.

hey canadians can use our embassies too
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Commonwealth_citizen#Consular_assistance
>Additionally, Canadian citizens can seek consular assistance at any British embassy or high commission where Canada is not represented.

fucking freeloaders!

britain is a cold country so a thick duvet is needed

the log is the best sleeping position

menshealth.com/health/sleep-position-master/slide/1

mate sort yourself out if you're actually going to youtube personalities for dating advice

I'm pathetic but not that low

>liqor
foy

abc.net.au/news/2017-04-26/more-people-than-ever-are-single-and-thats-a-good-thing/8473398
Important reminder that single people are BETTER than nuclear families

sleep with a summer weight duvet all year round

don't understand people who don't sleep flat on their backs

Fucking this. I just act completely aloof and disinterested and shut down anything because I have no idea how to handle it. Remember at school loads of people were telling me some girl was begging for it and I deliberately avoided her.
HAHAH

Remember being 15 and having the chance to get my first kiss and lose my virginity but I was too embarrassed that my first kiss and first shag were so late compared to what I thought was normal (though first kiss averaged at 10 and first bj at like 12) that I didn't go for it in case she could tell and laughed and told everyone else. Going on 23 now and still a KV lmao might kill myself for unrelated reasons haha

ignore the dating advice, look at his personal development stuff

In college during a presentation of some meme pre-req class two girls spent the entire time mocking my stutter, and afterwards one of their friends sarcastically congratulated me in a "look at me ironically communicating with the deviant" way.

At work the high school students throw food at me, make black social media style insults at me for being white (they are urban and the memes aren't just online), and take photos of me and edit them.

You get sleep paralysis you stupid cunt