Uses a death spell that doesn't work against the baby Harry

>uses a death spell that doesn't work against the baby Harry

>so instead just retreats like a retard instead of just stabbing, smothering, or physically harming the baby Harry.

Is Rowling the biggest hack?

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harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Sirius_Black's_knife
twitter.com/AnonBabble

>AHHHHHHHHHH MY SPELL BACKFIRED AAHHHHHHH HERE IS A DETAILED LIST OF WHAT I EXPECT YOU TO DO WHILE I RECOVER OOOOHHHHAUUUUGHHH WHATEVER YOU DO DON'T KILL THIS DEFENSELESS BABY

Was Voldemort actually a good friend?

wizards in that world don't understand how "normal" things works

"knife" is an absolutely uncompherensible concept to a wizard

He lost his body. There wasn't anything he could do to harm Harry right after it backfired. For all he knew, attacking him in his body-less form might end him for good, and he feared death above all.

wizards of old used swords all the time, surely at least some modern ones would as well

the curse bounced off harry and killed Voldemort's then-current body you idiot

He couldn't do much of anything until someone gave him a body to do it with

Is this an epic new maymay I'm not familiar with?

Of course she was, she created the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises. Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

he was immediately taken to the dursleys where he was protected as long as he called that place home or was not of age
some stuff, no. but they do have weapons like sword of gryffindor

Why are there so many adult children on Sup Forums now?

i mean, we can see when he's attached to quirrell that he can't even touch harry. it probably would have actually killed him as you say.

>Implying Dobby didn't get stabbed.

>"knife" is an absolutely uncompherensible concept to a wizard
Except when Wormtongue used one in his Warhammer Khorne ritual in the fourth book, of course. Or the knife that even has it's own wiki page -
harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Sirius_Black's_knife

...

>"knife" is an absolutely uncompherensible concept to a wizard

Knives will soon be an absolutely uncompherensible concept to most Brits

and when belatrix kills dobby

checked
and yeah, I got nothing then

that's a shard of glass, but yeah.

as was said above, the protection spell that lily gave to harry as she died would have protected him from any further voldemort attacks.

>Knives will soon be an absolutely uncompherensible concept to most Brits

How do they cut the beef at Hogwarts dining room, then?

cutting spells?

Never understood why he didn't just shoot harry with a gun or got an assassin to shoot him

kek, what in the actual fuck

>would have protected him from any further voldemort attacks
So let's say Voldemort sets up a bomb on the bus that Harry takes around that village he lives in with Dursleys. It's pure Semtex, cooked up by Irish wizards so you know it's good shit. Does he survive that too?

kino

Most retarded part of the series. The Dursleys never loved Harry. Surely Lily's magic should have worked based on love, not just blood ties? Wouldn't Harry have been safer with someone who loved him? Lily sure as fuck wouldn't have wanted her son to live in an abusive household.

Also how is Harry that special? Surely Lily is not the first person in the history of the universe to have intercepted a killing curse (or bullet or arrow for that matter) aimed at another person? Rowling could've at least showed us one other person protected in a similar way.

It's British, so everything is boiled until it becomes mush - it doesn't need cut.

no it was actually a knife. dobby does knock the chandelier down and sends glass everywhere but belatrix kills him with the knife she held to hermoine's throat

Yes.

It's fucking magic, nigga.

They would but the Ministry has made any blade longer than three cm illegal.

You're telling me Harry Potter can survive being incinerated?

In the absence of spears, black Londoners stab each other with kitchen knives at slamming rates

this is perfect
throws such a curve ball into
>so what, should we also ban kitchen knifes too?
argument

I read the entire pasta every single time.

It's not enough to just intercept a spell, you need to be given the choice to live and still choose death to protect the person in any way. If Snape hadn't pleaded with Voldemort to let Lily live Voldemort wouldn't have given Lily the choice to just give him Harry. Without that she would have just been killed and Harry would have been killed soon after. It was when she had the choice to abandon her child but chose to stay to protect him in what little way she could even when it meant her own death that the spell triggered.

Same way when Harry chose to be killed at the end. He knew he'd die but did it anyway to protect everyone else. This made everyone else protected from Voldemort, except it was diluted.

i agree harry never considered the dursleys house "home" anyway. like voldemort harry's first true home was hogwarts. That was stupid and I feel like the only reason Rowling did that was to try to figure out how Harry would leave for the burrow at the start of deathly hallows and be attacked by the death eaters.

What makes Harry special is the that voldemort chose him. By taking the prophecy seriously he made Harry into the threat that he feared him to be. I do agree that events similar to Lily protecting Harry would probably be something that would turn up once in a while though out History, but not extremely common. Voldemort told her to leave but she wouldnt and was killed for no purpose other than to stay with her son.

He wouldn't be incinerated. The magic would shield him. Because it's motherfucking magic.

They were abusive because Harry was a Horcrux, not because they were bad people. Everyone who lived with Horcruxes was turned completely fucking insane, and it's a pretty big accomplishment that the Dursleys were as mild-mannered as they were all after living with a Horcrux for that many years. Which is also why he had to die to break the Horcrux that was himself.

Ok what about a nuke then?

By intercepting a spell you are by definition making a conscious decision to die instead of live.

Also explain to me how Hogwarts was protected when half of the students and staff fucking died.

why doesn't hairy pooter live up to my adult standards?

top fucking kek, underated.

I think that rather than survive being incinerated Harry would somehow avoid the situation altogether - similar to how felix felicis makes things happen. Look at how stupidly lucky Harry was throughout the series. He has very little talent considering all he accomplished

Still doesn't mean they loved him, which is what my argument was.

Agree with you user. Also I think it was because Rowling started out writing books for kids and when her writing got more grimdark towards the end, she had to backpedal on that "mean wacky parents" trope.

>this is no sacrifice any wizard parent has ever made before in any war
Why are Wizards such shit parents?

You're not given a choice by your killer. It's not a "no I can't leave so I'll sit here and die rather than live without my son even though there's no way that it'll save him" moment. If you jump in front of a spell you're counting on your body blocking the spell. It's not a futile act where you choose death after being presented with a way out, with the knowledge that your death will change nothing.

Because they were only protected from Voldemort's spells. Also because of how it was diluted over all those people all it really did was make them able to talk even after Voldie cast a spell to silence them.

i dont think it works like that. Never was there any mention of feeling shitty in harry's presence. Also when you look at the locket only the wearer would be affected by the horcrux.

>beefius carvicus

mind blown

Of course they have. Otherwise Dumbledore wouldn't have known how it worked.

Unless you're a Sikh of course, because carrying a knife is a tenant of their religion.

In that case why is Voldemort s dumb when this exact scenario has presumably happened to death eaters working under him before, seriously diminishing the value of the killing curse?

Voldemort could pilot the death star and he still wouldn't be able to take out Harry. Because fundamental magic>>>science every time.

Diffindo

>tenant

kys

Why the fuck would deatheaters be giving people chances to walk away? The only reason Voldemort gave Lily that chance was because Snape begged him to, and Snape was important enough to make him do it. If it wasn't for Snape's begging he would have just killed Lily in a heartbeat. So would all the rest of the deatheaters when dealing with other enemies. Because they're fucking deatheaters.

3 > 6 > FBAWTFT > 7 > 5 > 8 > 2 > 1 > 4

why I come to these threads

So you only trigger the sacrifice if you get it written in triplicate after a witnessed verbal agreement that you don't 100% have to die for the sake of your loved one?

magic

Ok, what about anyone else then? What if Voldemort gets Harry and says to his friend, "OK, blast him with the RPG". What then?

3 being the best is such a meme.

Was this a power play? He knew harry was inexperienced. Did he just wanted to show him who is the boss because harry seemed to have forgotten it?

why didnt the muggles just shoot wizards or train muggleborns to do it for them?

teleport in, shoot lucius in the face, teleport out
ez

I had a dream where I was bullying Voldemort a few nights ago; I was just humiliating him, I took off his cloak and gave him a wedgie, I threw water balloons at him - I even pushed him into a pond. I woke up strangely satisfied and excited. I hope I dream about him again soon.

You're a wizard, Harry

Basically, yes. Hell, it might even be crucial that it's a mother who dies protecting her child.

Harry dies. It's a pretty important part that they're relying on Voldemort needing to kill Harry himself to salvage some of the fear and respect he lost when he was killed trying to kill him the first time. If Voldemort's second in command killed Harry then that second in command would be the guy who could kill Harry Potter when Voldemort couldn't. Voldemort can't have that shit, because his position in the group is based on fear and power.

TRU

is he just sore he aint got no nose?

>Hell, it might even be crucial that it's a mother who dies protecting her child.
But Harry does the same thing later

I'm going with my "literally every wizard is so selfish and cowardly that they never saw this coming before" theory

what is this garbage?

PROPHECY

IT'S A FUCKING PROPHECY

EVEN BY WIZARD STANDARDS THIS WHOLE HARRY / VOLDEMORT CLUSTERUCK WAS "IT'S MAGIC, I DON'T HAVE TO EXPLAIN SHIT"

Actually he got fucking disintegrated by the killing curse bouncing back in his face.

Nice try Australia but this is your knife laws.

Trash that plastic.

'But the more logical answer is that wizards are cowardly selfish untermenschen

It's best to assume every plot hole and inconsistency is due to every wizard being an absolute retard in some way.

It's just easier.

Wizards eat Irish children.

And it's way weaker than when his mother did it. Could be why. But yeah, probably doesn't require a mother.

Everything about it was a one-in-a-million shot. That's why Voldemort didn't see it coming and why there was a prophetic vision of it all happening.

I'm sure this has been said already, but you are a fucking idiot.
The Killing Curse rebounded and fucked his shit up.
>inb4 you bitch and complain how stupid or gay that is

But don't they use forks and spoons and shit to eat? Surely, they use fucking knives to cut meat and shit.
In other words, BULL SHIT.

why don't the wizards have guns?

wouldn't they be more effective in most situations?

Huey Lewis saved him.

That's stupid and gay.

Guns are a foreign concept to wizards, the guy announcing Sirius' escape has no idea what they are and is describing them like he's been given the first line of a wikipedia article about them

>uses a death spell against Harry
>it fails
>uses the same spell again
>it fails
>again
>it fails again
>the same spell again
>you know how it ends

Really smart guy.

Ohhh you sure showed me, bud.
So, a squad of Navy Seals vs Hogwarts. Go.

>So, a squad of Navy Seals vs Hogwarts. Go.

IMPERIO

"kill each other"

one

Stupid and gay tbqh

They'd have to spot them first. Reminder that retarded kids regularly slip out of the castle grounds.

You know what I would like to see?
A dark wizard that uses weapons and technology from the Muggle world in tandem with Dark Magic.
Like if Voldemort had mailed a letterbomb to Harry at Hogwarts.

She's British.

They can slip out because they're using secret passages that are literally impossible to use unless you know they're there and know the magic word.

The Navy Seals wouldn't even be able to approach Hogwarts, though. The wizards literally has a Muggle Fuckoffus spell that causes regular people to just decide to walk in another direction without thinking any of it.

That's the thing about magic. It's OP.

>britain
>stabbing
>knives

>be british/american government
>find out there is a completely separate class of people out just fucking living with magic powers while you're busy trying to figure out a way to fees your growing populace
>keep tabs on known wizards
>goon squad a few, beat them until they do whatever you want, work way up food chain until you get high-level wizard from ministry of magic who can feed you all the intel you need about magical schools and dark forests and shit
>have people working around the clock to reverse engineer revealing spells
>neutralize high value targets, rescue children that have been indocrrinated by wizard cult
>send them to an actual school so they can be productive members of society
And that's how the government saved the English isles from a cult of pagans that indoctrinated children into their society.

>I post this pasta in 2017

Wow.

>English isles
>Hogwarts is canonically in Scotland

Doing god's work, keep it up buddy

>frank
Fuck you.

what is the best one?

6 or 5.

3 is entirely mediocre even by HP standards.

>Not writing your name close to the tip of the sword so you can make them see your name before executing them.